Off the Curb - Olympics (Ep #2)


Uploaded by MondoMedia on 29.07.2012

Transcript:
[John:] London, that sh**'s coming up quick.
[Fred:] That's right. We got the Olympics coming. 2012.
Gotta have some new sports though, y'know,
like, uh, holding your breath.
[John:] Man, that's crazy. [Fred:] I try to hold my breath
for an hour a day. [John:] Ha!
[Fred:] Just as an exercise.
[Cedric:] It's good for your brain!
[John:] No wonder you're so crazy.
[Willie:] And you think somebody's gonna want to watch
a bunch of athletes sittin' around holdin' their breath.
[Fred:] Well they did! (Cedric coughs)
[Cedric:] I been trying to hold my breath,
y'all didn't even try to save me.
[Fred:] Try it one more time, you can do it.
[John:] Ready? ... now hold it.
Hold it.
Hold it.
Let's leave him here.
C'mon, let's go.
Let's stick him with the bill.
[Fred:] Oh that's a great idea.
[Willie:] Just cuz he's holding his breath y'all don't mean he's deaf.
He can hear us.
[John:] What- That don't matter, he's stupid!
[Cedric:] *cough cough* I was dying! [Fred:] I thought you just fell asleep.
[John:] Man, that's crazy.
[Fred:] You think Pac Man should be in the Olympics?
[Willie:] I think Pac Man ain't got no legs, he'd get disqualified.
[Cedric:] I would like to see Pacquiao fight Pac Man.
Pac Man gonna eat him.
[Fred:] Abacus. [Edilberto:] Uh, hello, uh...
[Fred:] Who do you think would win in a battle?
[Edilberto:] I think that the Pac Man doesn't have arms so
Manny would be punching him in the face all the time
and maybe the Pac Man would eat his boxing gloves
but I think that Pac Man would be allergic to the leather
and develop a rash and his throat would constrict, therefore
I have to say that Manny Pacquiao would win that fight.
[Wille:] The best thing he said, Pac Man is all face!
That's all he is, a big face!
He's gonna get punched everywhere!
[Edilberto:] Does anybody need anything else from me?
[John:] I need you to go away.
(laughing)
Hey y'all, if y'all were to win the Olympics,
I would sing for y'all.
Amaaaazing graaaace
[John:] Errybody bow your head.
[Cedric and Fred:] How sweeeee-
[John:] How sweet!
[Cedric and Fred:] -eeeet the sound.
[John:] How sweet the sound!
[Cedric and Fred:] That saaaaa-
[John:] That saved!
-aaaaved the riiiii-
[John:] A-men! Say the rest!
[Cedric, Fred, and Willie:] -iiiich like meeee. I waaaaa-
[John:] And a motherf***** falling down the hill
with his head smashed up!
And then somebody get knocked the f*** out!
And then...
this mother***** run into the horse
and he hit the thing and hurt hisself.
[Cedric:] My naaame is C.
[daRell:] That was a beautiful song.
[John:] Well that the nicest thing you've said, motherf*****.
[daRell:] America the beautiful.
[John:] What? No! (Laughter)