And as you said, no one can replace the great Pete Fineman, but l will do my best.
l have to say, l am so proud to be a part of our local community of Buffalo,
and l think, in a lot ofways, a great city is like a great recipe, really.
You take hardworking citizens, add some caregivers,
- maybe a few nuts, - [ Both Laughing ]
[ Wheezing Laughter] all sprinkled with the love and support ofgood families.
Ultimately, that makes one sweet place to live.
- That was amazing. - [ Evan ] t meant it.
- l wish l'd written something. - And now let's go live...
to that wacky Bruce Nolan out at Niagara Falls.
Hey! Wacky Bruce!
Bruce? Talk, Bruce. Hello?
- Talk, honey. Talk. - What's going on?
- We got a Walt Disney. - He's frozen solid. - We may not have audio. Check.
- We may be having a bit oftechnical difficulty. - Feed's good,Jack.
Move. Come on. Come on. Come on. Talk, Bruce, damn it!
- All right. Get ready to pull the plug. - Come on, baby. Say something.
- Say something. - Bruce, talk.
- Hi, Susan. - Oh, thankyou, God.
Bruce Nolan here dbodrdthe Maid ofthe Mist in fabulous Niagara falls.
First off. Iet mejust add another congratulations to Evan Backstabber--
Pardon me. Bastard. Baxter, rather. It is good to see what someone with talent can do...
when great opportunities are given to them instead ofme. [ Chuckles Nervously]
An_ay, l'm here with Katharine Hepburn's mom.
Tell me. Why did you throw the blue Heart ofthe Oceanjewel over the railing ofthe rĂt_nic_
Did you feel bad at all letting Leo DiCaprio drown whileyou were safe, floating on the door?
Could you have taken turns, orwereyoujust too afraid to freezeyour big, fat ass off?
- [ Gasps ] - Hmm. l guess that's how life is, isn't it?
Some people are drenched, freezing to death on a stupid boat...
with a stupid hat, while others are in a com_ news studio, suckin' up all the gloy.
- Oh, well. No big deal. - [ Man ] Oh, boy.
Oh, look. It's the owner _5the Maid ofthe Mist.
Let's have a talkwith him, shall we? Come on in here, Bill.
No, no, no, no. No, no. Come on. Let's have a talk.
Come on. What areyou doing?
Bill, you've been running the M_i_ofthe M_st for 23 years now. Tell me.
Why doyou think l didn't get the anchorjob?
ls it my hair, Bill?Are my teeth notwhite enough?
Or like the great falls, is the bedrock ofmy life...
eroding beneath me?
Eroding! Eroding! Eroding!
[ Blabbering Incoherently]
Go to black. l'm on it.
l'm Bruce Nolan 5__ Eyewitness News. Back toyou, fuckers!
- [ All Groaning ] - Oh, boy. - Oh, myGod.
[ Grunting ]
That is perfect. That is the motivation that l needed!
