Deaf Family Finds Themselves Torn Between Deaf and Hearing Worlds (Part 6)


Uploaded by Paro77777 on 05.12.2009

Transcript:
Well what are you doing now? Marian when I saw the kids at that school I realized that
because of their sign language, their language and writing abilities were equal to the hearing
kids. You may be 100% correct. Maybe it's the best school for the deaf in the world.
My feeling? You are moving your family away to escape an issue that's going on here. Cochlear
implants. Ma. I know how you feel about the cochlear implant. But I don't want the implant
for Heather. That's it. That's my final decision. And Maryland will have more interpreters,
more opportunities more communication. Deaf people are accepted there. Living in Maryland
will be better for our kids. We're a deaf family. Peter and I grew up deaf. We know
what it's like growing up in a hearing culture. We can do better for our kids. You don't understand
deaf people's feelings. One way. Deaf way. There are both worlds here. You only want
deaf world for your children. They have to live in both worlds. You why did you go for
a cochlear? Why? She was curious. Curious? That's bull. She said to me I want to be the
same. I want to hear the music. I want to dance. That's wantign to live in both worlds.
So you're saying we're limiting our children? That's ridiculous. We'll give them the best
of everything. I feel so much pressure about this. I've had enough. Because you don't want
to accept it. You are running away. Are you running away because I'm pressuring you? No.
Come on Mom. If you wanted the best for your kids future you would be giving them a cochlear
and the opportunity to have both worlds. I feel like your mother keeps stifling me. I
feel like she's controlling us. I want her off our back. I know honey I know. Ignore
her. You're the Mother. We're going to move on with our plans. She's only the grandmother.
Just ignore her. I thought your parents would be proud of us. That they would at least trust
that we're doing the right thing. But they think we're making the wrong decision. That's
my parents. That's who they are. If my father see that we're right he'll be alright with
it. But my Mom is just being so heartless. I tried to share how I feel. She wouldn't
let me. She just kept putting me down. It made me so angry. I tried so hard. Just ignore
her. You take it too hard. When we get to Maryland you'll bemuch much happier I promise
you. We'll meet a lot of new deaf people there. There's a big deaf community there that will
accept you for who you are. What's most important is our happiness. You've been through so much.
Come here. You know my picture is going to be blasted on a dartboard and the NAD's going
to be throwing things at me because we're the posterchild for what not to do according
to their rules. If you think things are negative now when you go to do this the response of
those deaf members of your family are going to be extraordinarily strong at that point.
And the obvious reason for that is you're taking a member of their society and culture
and you're pulling them out. And all of that stuff like what's the matter we're not good
enough for him? What's the matter you're ashamed of us? What's the matter this is not the best
like for him? We've done perfectly well as deaf people. We're proud of being deaf. We're
happy people. Why do you have to feel compelled to do this? In a couple of years when Peter
is responding his cousins will be turning around and asking a lot of questions so I
feel that that's when the real fury is going to come up is when the questions are going
to be raised and how do you deal with something like that? When you see Peter with the implant
will that make you change your mind and want it? No. I don't want it. You don't want it?
Why? I don't want a cochlear implant. That's fine. It's your decision. Whatever you're
comfortable with. You told me you decided. We decided together, remember we agreed? Ohhh.
Hello Doctor how are you? What time did you get up? About three 'o clock. But why couldn't
you sleep? Because I didn't feel like it. I'm old. Were you up all night worrying about
the implant? No. I was worried. I was up all night. Well I don't feel worried. I feel calm and
relaxed. Well I feel worried. Yes. I really do. It will be fine. When my children were
born I would've never dreamed we'd be sitting here today waiting for my grandson to have
his surgery on his ears to make him hear. What if we lose deafness in the future and
there's no more deaf people. That's why you're upset and I understand that. And Peter and
Nita I'm sure feel the same way. People will never forget what deafness is about. Because
it's going to be history. If I gave birth now to Peter. I don't mean to hurt you but
I would definitely have the surgery. Because I know what it was like to raise deaf children.
Tough. Very tough. Hi everything went real well. No problems. No problems. This makes
me want to cry. A new begining. I'm afraid he'll make fun of me. No he will never make
fun of you. He will talk so well and then I'm afraid he'll hurt me. Ohh. I feel so hurt.
I'm going to go up to see him now. Wait. If you give birth to another deaf child would
you have the surgery again? Yes Mom, I would. I'm going to connect up the external transmittor
here. It's just going to stick right on. Put this right here. There we go. Let me begin
by telling you some new things. What we're going to do is we're going to start to increase
the current a little bit on the most low frequency electrode that we've got. One of several things
may happen. We may not see anything at all. We may see a negative response. We may see
some sort of searching or blinking or any of that so we're going to be paying very close
attention in terms of watching him because that's what we really need to see, okay? Even
though you've waited a long time for this and he's waited a long time his ears were
just born today. I'm going to go, one, two, three, go! ::Noise:: Hi! That was so good.
You did a great job! Good boy. This is still relatively low. One, two, three Go! ::Noise::
You couldn't ask for anything better guys. I hate to tell you. Okay guys, right now he's
been listening to each of the electrodes which really is nothing very interesting although
he's been great. We're going to turn the speech on. One, two, three.. "Peter!" Peter. Peter.
Hi Peter! Hi baby boy. How are you? Hi buddy. His ears are exactly five minutes old. So
that's really a critical thing at this point to expose him to as much sound and to make
him very happy about it. Chris this is amazing. He's turning to her everytime she speaks.
Peter hi! Hi! Hi! Hi Peter! Mamamama It's Mommy! Peter. How big is Peter? SOOOO big!
Good boy. You hear Daddy? That's my boy. Can you copy Daddy? You hear Daddy? It's unbelieveable.
The cochlear implant is providing my son with freedom and opportunity and the key to the
world. That's the opportunity that I'm providing for my son. Deaf culture as they know it is
done. Maybe it's true. Deaf people will become extinct. And my heart will be broken. Deaf
culture is something to value and cherish. It's my culture. If your hearing culture was
wiped out hearing people would cry and feel lost. Well, so would I.