Live with RETTA & Beth Hoyt! - 9/20/12 (Full Ep)

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BETH HOYT: Hashtag, happy Parks and Rec day!
RETTA: Ooh, OK.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
BETH HOYT: We're living the hashtag, you guys.
I'm here with Retta.
It's Retta day.
RETTA: Yay.
BETH HOYT: Retta, AKA Donna from Parks and Rec, is here to
hang out, answer your questions, and talk about the
season premiere, which airs tonight 9:30
Eastern, 8:30 Central.
Welcome back, Retta.
RETTA: Well thanks, Beth Hoyt.
How are you?
BETH HOYT: I'm good.
Oh, no.
RETTA: Uh-oh, uh-oh.
BETH HOYT: That's how you classily solve it.
RETTA: Cheers.
BETH HOYT: Cheers.
All right.
That's the show.
We're going to drink now.
No.
OK.
We already have a comment from YouTube.
RETTA: Oh, is that right?
BETH HOYT: Before my question, let's answer one of theirs.
Pawneegoddess, "Question, anything about what Donna is
up to during today's episode?" So not
giving too many spoilers.
RETTA: I get to make fun of Tom.
That's all I can really say.
BETH HOYT: How do you feel about that?
RETTA: OK.
It's cool.
I like making fun of people.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
RETTA: I love that you give me champagne.
BETH HOYT: Well, I like that when you come on-- because I'm
like, well Retta's coming.
We need to get champagne.
That's just the thing that we do whenever Retta comes.
RETTA: This boozy chick.
She likes to drink.
BETH HOYT: Well, so do I. And I mean I couldn't
say that you do.
But it's also just like, I'm glad you're here.
And also it was just really fun last time.
Did you guys hear the last episode when Retta was on?
RETTA: Oh my god.
We were dancing.
BETH HOYT: We danced.
We had a big choreography session with the Smash
choreographer.
RETTA: Lot of work.
BETH HOYT: It was crazy.
I had a break down.
RETTA: Speaking of Smash, can't wait
till that comes back.
BETH HOYT: What do you-- how do you have your count--
how do you count down to that?
RETTA: I don't even know the day.
What's the day?
BETH HOYT: You don't have a count down.
RETTA: I don't.
BETH HOYT: It's better because if you're counting,
it's just too much--
RETTA: It stresses you out.
BETH HOYT: Do you watch Breaking Bad?
RETTA: You know Jonathan Banks just appeared on our show.
Mike Ehrmantraut.
BETH HOYT: Oh, yeah.
RETTA: I love him.
BETH HOYT: Wait.
Just-- as in the season five episode?
RETTA: We just shot it last week.
BETH HOYT: Because I was like, did I miss something?
RETTA: No, no.
We just shot it last week.
BETH HOYT: What happened?
Did he ever giggle?
RETTA: He plays Ben Wyatt's dad.
BETH HOYT: Oh my gosh.
RETTA: Yeah.
So he comes to town.
And I got to meet him.
BETH HOYT: How was that?
RETTA: At first, I think he thought I was a little bit
crazy, because everybody was kind of geeking out.
And they brought him to set to meet the director.
And then they introduced us to him.
And the first thing I said to him was like, oh my god.
My favorite line-- and I know he was like--
BETH HOYT: What does he do?
RETTA: My favorite line is when you say, it's a big
world, Walter.
Lot of meth heads.
He was like, yup, that's great.
That's great.
I moved on.
BETH HOYT: Have you seen the episode--
I just want to give you a spoiler alert.
RETTA: Yes.
I was--
BETH HOYT: If I was seeing him, I'd be like--
RETTA: --devastated by it.
He was my favorite of last season and this season.
And then when he says--
I mean if you haven't seen it yet, I'm sorry.
BETH HOYT: We'll put a big spoiler alert on there later.
RETTA: But when he says, shut up and let me die in peace.
I had said that.
I had said that.
BETH HOYT: Oh my gosh.
RETTA: I was like, shut up, Walter.
Let the man die in peace.
And then he turned and said it.
I was like, oh my god.
I love him.
I love him.
BETH HOYT: I was just crying.
RETTA: It was very sad.
BETH HOYT: Man.
Although I don't think the crying happened until after
because it was like--
and then after the show ends, then I deal with all--
I'm like, what is happening?
I'm so full of emotions.
All right.
We have a question from Twitter.
It's from vanessagene.
"Funniest moment on set this season?" On set of--
for season five of Parks and Rec.

RETTA: God, there's so many.
But I can't really say what they are.
BETH HOYT: What about one from-- a recent one that
doesn't have a spoiler alert?
RETTA: Well, one of my favorite things of last season
was the water fight, because I was the only one
that didn't get wet.
So I got to stand outside with the hose pointed at Jim
O'Heir, AKA Jerry Gergich.
And Aubrey was chasing Rashida around the office.
And she kept trying to throw water balloons at me.
And I was like, no, bitch.
I see you.
And I was like juking and jiving.
So I was the only one that got away without
having to get drenched.
BETH HOYT: Gosh.
RETTA: It was nice.
BETH HOYT: That sounds fun.
I always wonder about-- so one of my favorite scenes ever is
when Jerry farts.
RETTA: That's another thing I can tell you.
Jerry farts again this season.
BETH HOYT: Oh, yes.
But I mean you're already set up in that.
That's just a wonderful scene.
It's set up so well that you guys can't laugh and can't
make fun of him.
Did that make it like-- were you then--
was it easier because you're already acting on top
of that, kind of?
RETTA: The first time we did it, it was a surprise because
we didn't know they had given him break-away pants.
And so they made a bigger sound than we expected.
So the very first take you see our faces.
The very first take, I was like--
was that real?
And Aziz just lost it.
He just lost it.
And after that, we were OK.
BETH HOYT: That's the best.
Oh, we have another comment from YouTube.
And it's from VloggingLuverr.
"Hey, Beth and Retta!"
RETTA: Hey.
BETH HOYT: "What are your favorite colors?" Red.
RETTA: I love red.
I'm in between bright, bright yellow and hot, hot pink.
I'm getting ready to add some hot pink to my bedroom.
(MOUTHING) Expensive.
BETH HOYT: I'm surprised you don't already
have a hot pink bedroom.
RETTA: I just redid my bedroom.
So I'm adding it.
BETH HOYT: Good.
That sounds about right.
RETTA: I hear if you build it, he will come.
I'm building it.
So he better freaking come.
BETH HOYT: [LAUGHING]
I love that.
Are you with your girlfriends like the way you are on Parks
and Rec when--
how you're so good at being like, don't call him back.
I find that I'm really-- whenever someone likes
someone, I'm always just like, you know, try it.
I'm really bad.
I'm a bad friend that way.
RETTA: Well if somebody--
if they should get out of it?
BETH HOYT: Yeah, or just even if it's like, maybe they could
have a date or two, and it wouldn't be that bad.
But Donna's so good at being like, don't
even waste your time.
RETTA: Yeah.
Yeah, no I'm not as--
I mean my friends always make fun of me, because I don't
give people a chance.
And I'm like, are you kidding me?
I'm like a desperate whore.
I let everyone in.
What are you talking about?
And they're like, no you don't.
You're always--
but I'm always the one to be like, yeah, I'm sorry.
All that craziness, he's got a pager still?
No.
He's got to go.
He's up to something.
BETH HOYT: Well, I mean I would do-- the pager.
I'm a whore, though, too.
Let the right one in.
But then--
only so far.
Next tweet comment is from Hollie1245.
"Hey, love you, Beth and Retta.
Reply."
RETTA: Sure.
BETH HOYT: So, can I see that face again?
If you love us, ask a--
so I think it was the face with the D. Yeah.
I'm figuring out emoticon faces.
I think that one is--
yeah.
RETTA: The one I don't get is the one where they do just the
X with the D. And I'm like, is that--
BETH HOYT: Oh, I know.
RETTA: What is that?
Is that--
I'm not sure.
BETH HOYT: I know.
I just figured that out too.
I think it's this.
RETTA: Oh.
BETH HOYT: Which is just when you're hoping
to just catch flies.
RETTA: You know what I didn't get for a while was when they
just typed letters, like just random letters.
And I was like, do I check-- because it was always like,
J-K-D-J-K-D. And I was like, what does that mean?
And I would look it up online.
And I didn't get it.
And then it just meant they didn't know what to say, and
they just hit all the letters on the thing.
So someone had to explain it.
I was like, what does this mean?
BETH HOYT: Well, you just explained it to me.
Thanks for relaying that.
RETTA: Glad I could.
BETH HOYT: I'll tell someone else that didn't know.
And we'll just keep passing on.
We have a comment--
RETTA: I love that you keep filling it up because I'm
drinking it so fast.
BETH HOYT: Retta, I'm with you on this.
I'm not trying to--
RETTA: We drank that much.
BETH HOYT: But we have full glasses.
We didn't drink it yet.
We will drink that much.
RETTA: It's about to be on.
BETH HOYT: Next comment from YouTube is from SieraBeagan1.
"Hey, Beth and Retta.
Are you guys going to get drunk?"
RETTA: Looks like it.
I'm already sweating.
So I'm on my way.
BETH HOYT: I get cold.
RETTA: Do you really?
Ooh, I get really warm.
I'm so jealous.
Your hands are freezing.
BETH HOYT: I know.
I have bad circulation.
I'm touching something cold.
I'm just--
it's bad.
RETTA: I need to ask you to put it here to keep it warm.
But that'd be really weird, right?
BETH HOYT: Well, that's what I do.
So I turn yellow.
I have bad circulation.
And I pit them.
RETTA: Do you really?
BETH HOYT: They're really good.
I knee pit them with guys sometimes, their knee.
I'm just like, do you mind if I just borrow your knee pit?
But I mean with girls, it's like the best.
I've discovered that that's the best place to quickly warm
up your hands.
So much good human warmth happening, not with me but--
next comment from YouTube is from wickedlyobsessed.
"Retta, what are your latest Buffy thoughts?"
RETTA: We were just talking about Buffy.
I was telling them, season one--
BETH HOYT: So you're in season three right now?
RETTA: I still have to watch the last two of season three,
the graduation.
I tried to start it the other night--
BETH HOYT: That's not a good sign.
RETTA: --but I fell asleep, and then I've been working.
So I haven't had time.
BETH HOYT: That's not a good sign.
RETTA: But season one, I was like, this is lame.
It's too cheesy.
Season two was when it started to get decent.
Season three I'm enjoying.
And hopefully, it'll keep rising.
I really like the personal stuff.
The supernatural stuff, eh, I could live with.
I could live without it.
You know what I'm saying?
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
RETTA: But--
BETH HOYT: I keep debating if I should start that one.
RETTA: --it's OK.
BETH HOYT: Do you watch Doctor Who?
RETTA: No, but everybody keeps tweeting me that I should.
Have you watched it?
Do you watch it?
BETH HOYT: I started.
I started with two episodes that were recommended to me,
one of them by Nate.
And they were good episodes.
RETTA: You like it?
BETH HOYT: I'm into it.
It's just, again, I get overwhelmed when there's a
bunch of seasons to catch up on something.
RETTA: Right.
No, see, I enjoy that.
BETH HOYT: So, yeah.
You--
I'm going to burp now.
You just say, I'm going to start watching this show.
Well, it helps that you're so good at Twitter that it gives
it like a purpose.
For me, I'm just like, so just so you all know, I'm going to
be watching a lot of TV.
RETTA: It's almost like work.
And I know that there will be certain people who will tune
in to the Twitter because of it, because they love it.
And they want to see how I react to it.
But I like having the whole thing, knowing that it's going
to end, not waiting till the end of the season and being
like, oh, they cancelled the show.
You know?
You're like, ooh.
BETH HOYT: And that is a really good way to go into it.
RETTA: So I like watching a full series like that.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, I watched Breaking Bad, the first
seasons like that.
Like, I was catching up on them.
And then so this last season was kind of different to watch
it week by week.
And I wonder if--
RETTA: Yeah.
It was hard for me too, because I
always watch it on DVD.
So I could get through it.
I hate waiting a week.
BETH HOYT: Just days and days of just getting involved.
RETTA: And then you're all in it.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, man.
RETTA: Body and soul.
BETH HOYT: Yup.
You go out to get coffee, and you're like, get off me.
RETTA: That's how I was with The Shield.
BETH HOYT: Oh my god.
The Shield.
RETTA: Oh my god.
The Shield is deep.
You know, The Shield is from the guys from--
well, one of the writers from The Shield created Sons of
Anarchy, Kurt Sutter.
BETH HOYT: There we go.
RETTA: And The Shield was deep.
Like, I remember--
BETH HOYT: She's telling it.
She's telling it.
RETTA: I watched it way late, and I remember I would like--
who can I call? (WHISPERING) Who watched this?
Who watched this?
BETH HOYT: Oh, man.
That's funny because after Breaking Bad, you're like,
where do I go now?
And so that's where I'm going next.
We have a comment from YouTube.
And it's from ThanksAnyway.
"What cast member makes everyone break the most?
My guess is Chris Pratt.
Good question.
RETTA: Chris Pratt is really good
because he gets everybody.
He gets Nick.
Nick Offerman is hard to break.
And Chris Pratt is the one person that can break him.
But Amy and Nick--
because Nick is always so serious--
sometimes he'll say something so blue, so filthy that we all
have a moment of--
and Chris and Nick are good for burping and
farting in the scene.
And you're like, what, I'm supposed to keep
talking while you have--
BETH HOYT: So how often does it happen that an actor
decides to do something to try and crack everyone up?
Because I mean, I suppose it would have to be after you
know you have a good take.
Because then they must feel guilty for
taking everyone's time.
I wonder how that-- when you feel like you have enough
confidence to be like, I'm going to ruin this take.
It's going to be a great story, and everyone's going to
love it but like--
RETTA: Usually, you've done a couple where you have it.
And sometimes you do it just so you can mess somebody up,
enjoy that moment.
BETH HOYT: That's fine.
RETTA: Oh my god.
I'm burping, too.
BETH HOYT: You guys, it's nature taking its course.
Next comment.
RETTA: I need a fan.
It's hot.
BETH HOYT: Nate, fan her.
We have a comment from YouTube.
It's iamsostokes.
"You two should watch Teen Wolf."
RETTA: I get that a lot, too.
I get that a lot.
BETH HOYT: You're going to have to take a break.
If you watch all of Buffy, I don't think can go
right into Teen Wolf.
RETTA: Well, do you watch TVD?
BETH HOYT: No.
RETTA: The Vampire Diaries?
BETH HOYT: Oh, no.
RETTA: It's so good.
It's like the best writing on--
some of the best writing on TV.
No joke.
Like, really good writing.
I mean it still has like that teenage, camp-- a
little bit of that.
BETH HOYT: I like that.
RETTA: But mythology-wise, there's been maybe two
episodes in the-- what, four seasons--
that at the end of the episode, that I
didn't go, oh my god.
Like, or how are they going to--
that's how every episode ends.
It's so good.
BETH HOYT: Selling this again.
RETTA: It's really good.
BETH HOYT: I like this.
RETTA: I like it a lot.
BETH HOYT: Would you guys like that if I watched that?
I want to watch things that you guys want
to talk about, too.
I know Doctor Who, we need to-- it's still, though, do I
start from the beginning?
I just discovered, though-- you know how Doctor Who is
played by different actors?
Maybe I can tell you this.
RETTA: Didn't know that.
BETH HOYT: So Doctor Who's played by different actors.
You guys, excuse us for this moment of recapping on what
Doctor Who is all about.
But he--
and I thought it was like-- because everyone talks about
how David Tennant is gone.
And I thought that they just got a different actor, and
there was a big conspiracy.
But Doctor Who regenerates because he-- is
that the right word?
So it's a-- they planned it.
And then so every two seasons, he--
because he's an alien-ish.
So he's an alien.
So he comes back as a different-- but he looks kind
of the same.
But it's like a different version.
It's like a switching of a Becky type thing in Roseanne.
It's like it looks kind of like him.
But I think that's a really smart thing.
I'm like, I like that this is a planned thing.
But that must be hard to get booked.
Like, you book Doctor Who, and then you're like, this is a
short stint.
RETTA: Exactly.
BETH HOYT: All right.
Next comment from YouTube is from T4YL0RPH3LPS.
I think Taylor Phillips.
"Do you have a favorite cast member to hang out with after
hours?"
RETTA: No, I don't really like any of them.
No.
I like Chris.
Chris Pratt and I--
I'm a drinker.
And Chris likes his spirits.
So Chris and I will get a drink every once in a while.
But my homie, my ace, my [MAKING SOUNDS]
is Jim.
So we end up at--
BETH HOYT: I like that that's real.
RETTA: --different events together.
We end up at, you know--
I'll be like, what time you getting there?
Because sometimes we hate those things.
And so we're like, you're going, right?
I'm not going if you're not going.
That kind of thing.
BETH HOYT: Do you ever put your shows on your phone?
And when you're at an event, and you're
like, I have an hour.
Can you do that?
Or are you like, I settle in, and I watch-- when you have
eight seasons of Buffy to catch up on.
RETTA: No, no.
I can't do it on the phone.
BETH HOYT: I appreciate that.
RETTA: I can do it on an iPad, but those are on DVD.
So I don't really do it like that.
BETH HOYT: I like that.
That's good.
Next comment from YouTube is from CWWH12.
"Retta, have you ever watched Alias?
Get on it."
RETTA: Yes, I've watched that.
I own the box set.
BETH HOYT: She's on it.
RETTA: I have over 2,000 DVDs.
BETH HOYT: So you like watching them through DVD?
I like that, too.
RETTA: Because I watch a lot of movies.
I'm also a movie freak.
But if I haven't watched the series, and if somebody says
it's really good, I'll just buy it.
BETH HOYT: I like that.
RETTA: I started Alias, and I just couldn't keep up with it.
And so I just marathoned it one month.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
Have you watched 24?
RETTA: Yup.
I have all those DVDs, too.
BETH HOYT: What's making me just think about 24?
I watched something made me really put 24 on the mind.
I don't know.
Anyway, I kind of miss--
I liked that show.
It was like a good cadence.
I had a good drunk weekend of watching a lot of
two seasons of that.
It was a good weekend.
I didn't leave the apartment.
It was really nice.
I don't know if I like the show or if it was just a
really nice weekend.
Next comment is from SieraBeagan1.
"Where did you guys grow up?" And then, you know, that face.
Which is a weird face, afterwards you grow up.
Are you--
RETTA: They were like, that's a stupid
question but whatever.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
Wisconsin.
RETTA: Jersey.
Dirty Jersey.
BETH HOYT: Where in Jers?
RETTA: I was born in Newark.
And in second grade, we moved to Edison.
And then in high school, we moved to Cliffwood Beach.
So I went to Matawan High.
BETH HOYT: Is some of your family still there?
RETTA: They're all still there.
BETH HOYT: Cool.
So when you come to the East Coast, you get to--
sometimes if you're here for a long enough time--
RETTA: Sometimes.
Usually, they'll come up and see me in New York.
But I don't usually get time.
I go there for Thanksgiving and Christmas.
That's about it.
BETH HOYT: What's your favorite part of Thanksgiving,
of the meal?
RETTA: Of the meal?
It's a toss up between the mashed
potatoes and the stuffing.
But my mom's a really good cook.
Everything is really good.
BETH HOYT: My mom--
I'm sorry, mom, if you're watching this.
But she didn't make real mashed potatoes.
I didn't really realize how good they
are until after college.
I mean she did a lot of other things.
And she cooked dinner every single night.
But I didn't know what I was missing, which is better that
I didn't know.
RETTA: I just brought my family last year for
Thanksgiving.
And because everybody knows how well my mother cooks,
people were kind of inviting themselves.
BETH HOYT: Oh, so you're family would come to LA?
RETTA: Yeah.
I brought my cousins, my brothers, their girlfriends,
and my dad, and mom.
BETH HOYT: Awesome.
RETTA: And so there were people that
were like, so I hear--
I'm like, are you trying to invite yourself to my house?
OK.
Sure.
I mean all right.
Bring something.
BETH HOYT: I don't know.
Yeah.
I think--
I still haven't tried any real mashed potatoes.
I live in New York, so it's--
RETTA: Wait, you still haven't tried any?
BETH HOYT: It's easy for me to just hop over to New Jersey
any time to really taste mashed potatoes.
I mean--
RETTA: Oh, you're trying to get invited.
I was just trying to understand what was
happening just now.
BETH HOYT: No big deal, I'm just--
RETTA: Yeah, we might be doing it this year, so--
BETH HOYT: It's no big deal.
I live here, and that's so close.
Next comment from YouTube is from pawneegoddess.
"If you could choose to play any other character from the
show, who would you choose and why?"
RETTA: To play any other character?
Chris Pratt, I would love to do anything.
Just to be able to be that silly and--

BETH HOYT: It is like-- yeah.
Anything could happen tomorrow for him.
Yeah.
RETTA: Or I could play April.
And then I get to make out with Andy.
Not so bad.
BETH HOYT: Or if you are Andy, you could make
out with your face.
RETTA: Or that.
BETH HOYT: How's that?
RETTA: Sure.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
We have another tweet from--
this is from velick, Matt Velick.
"Should we see Retta's brother Levondrious, and what awesome
talent would you want him to play?"
RETTA: What awesome talent would I--
BETH HOYT: Let's see that again.
"What awesome talent would you want to play him?"
RETTA: Oh, Levondrious.

I don't know if we're going to see Levondrious.
But I think I would like my friend Craig
Robinson to play him.
That would be fun.
And I'd love to be angry at him all the time and just like
hate on him and just be able to just be very,
very rude to Craig.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
RETTA: And it'd be OK.
BETH HOYT: I want that to happen.
I think that that could happen.
RETTA: It could.
You never know.
I mean Craig's on Office, and Greg
Daniels created The Office.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
Well, I mean you're in the same network.
It's just it's--
we got it out there.
We just all need to start that petition.
Do it for Retta.
RETTA: Please.
BETH HOYT: Next comment.
We have one more comment.
Alyson Shave, "What's the most recent thing you treated
yourselves to?"
RETTA: What's the most recent thing you've
treated yourself to?
BETH HOYT: I mean really recently, it's this.
RETTA: This, exactly.
BETH HOYT: If we're talking real recent.
RETTA: The redesign of my bedroom.
BETH HOYT: Oh, yeah.
RETTA: I just redesigned my bedroom.
BETH HOYT: Also, you flew in on a red eye.
Whenever I take a red eye, I majorly treat myself.
It's like, I deserve three breakfasts.
Did you have a good meal when you finally
woke up or came to?
RETTA: Well, no, I had--
BETH HOYT: My body's always like--
RETTA: I had half a burger melt before I came here.
BETH HOYT: Just the half?
RETTA: I didn't have a lot of time.
BETH HOYT: And then did did you Auto-Tune your reaction?
(SINGING) Damn.
RETTA: (SINGING) Damn.
Damn, damn, damn, damn.
Oh my god.
It's so good.
It's so good.
You guys got to watch that.
Five guys Auto-Tune, check it on YouTube.
BETH HOYT: And we want you to do a--
RETTA: I want to do it.
BETH HOYT: --remix with him.
And do some sort of--
RETTA: (SINGING) Damn, damn, damn.
BETH HOYT: Because I watched it for the first time in the
green room, and Retta was singing along with the video.
And I was like, this is what makes it is Retta singing it.
You guys, also-- sorry, one more.
This is not a tweet or--
because it's from my mom, and she doesn't know how to tweet
or respond on YouTube.
But she, my mom--
Mom Hoyt just texted in. "You lie like a rug.
I always make real potatoes and sweet potatoes."
RETTA: [LAUGHING]
That's hilarious.
You lie like a rug.
BETH HOYT: But here's the thing--
I don't think she does.
Anyway, that's all the time we have.
This was really fun.
Thank you so much for coming by.
RETTA: Thanks for having me.
BETH HOYT: Anytime.
Tune in tonight, 9:30, for the season premier
of Parks and Rec.
Thanks so much for being here.
See you guys tomorrow.
You're my favorite.

RETTA: Cheers.
Oh, you need to match it.
[MUSIC PLAYING]