Let's Play Shadow Man Ep. 1: The Most Amazing Performance I've Ever Seen


Uploaded by AquatakatII on 25.07.2010

Transcript:
>> RYAN: Hello, Internet people. My name is Ryan and today we are playing Shadow Man for
the PC.
I heard it's a good game.
[electrical sounds]
Oh god, what the hell is going on?
>> SHADOW MAN: For many thousands of years the Shadow Men have protected the world of
the living against threats crossing over from the spiritual plane known as Deadside.
The place where everyone goes without exception when they die.
>> RYAN: Ooh.
>> SHADOW MAN: Michael LeRoi is the current heir to the mysteries of this ancient lineage:
bearer of the Mask of Shadows.
When darkness falls, he becomes the walker between the worlds,
immortal voodoo warrior, taker of souls, lord of Deadside,
the Shadow Man.
>> RYAN: OK.
Anyway, I heard it was good. I hope it actually is good.
Tried this on the Nintendo 64.
>> RYAN: That was a... >> JACK: The ninth of November, 1888.
>> RYAN: unmitigated failure. >> JACK: By my deeds am I known and I am known
as Jack, Springheel Jack, Jack the Ripper.
By my deeds am I known, and they are truly bloody.
I took them all to my heart.
Mary Ann Nichols, Annie Chapman, Elizabeth Stride, Catharine Eddowes, Mary Kelly...
and loved them, truly loved them all.
But the immortal power I sought within the sordid confines of their bodies, the still-beating
organ of the soul, was not to be found.
The ritual of the knife was to no avail.
I am bereft and must, therefore, perform that bloody ritual upon myself.
>> Stay your hand, Jack and listen to what I have to say.
>> JACK: How did you find this place? Who are you?
>> LEGION: My name is Legion, for we are many.
The immortal power that you seek does exist.
It does, indeed, lie within the soul, but only within certain ones.
Certain... dark souls.
>> JACK: My god!
What are you that you can produce such things from thin air?
>> LEGION: Merely an explorer, much like yourself.
>> JACK: What is it that you want from me?
>> LEGION: You are an architect by trade, are you not?
>> JACK: I am.
>> LEGION: Then I would have you build a cathedral to pain.
A place where you and I and others like us may join together.
A place of asylum for all of the unique and misunderstood individuals that will follow
you as the time of armageddon approaches.
And at the heart of asylum, we shall construct a great dark engine powered by souls of equal
hue
and we shall harness their power to create an immortal army
to punish and cleanse this pathetic world.
>> JACK: And where might I build this cathedral of yours?
>> LEGION: Across the veil...
in the darkness...
amongst the restless spirits of those who have passed beyond.
In the place known as Deadside.
>> JACK: Then, if I am to join you, I must die!
>> LEGION: It is prophecy.
We cannot fail
for we are many.
>> JACK: For we are many!
[wet choking noises]
>> RYAN: That's acting, folks.
>> LEGION: Amen to that.
>> RYAN: Acting. That was amazing.
Greatest cut-scene ever, all time.
>> ... Sooner than you think!
>> Come to mama, baby!
>> Hey there! Face the...
>> Catch me if you can!
>> For we are many.
>> RYAN: What's going on?
>> NETTIE: There's a darkness coming.
>> RYAN: Oh.
>> SHADOW MAN: What's the problem, Agnetta?
>> NETTIE: I had a dream, Shadow Man.
A real bad dream.
A Deadside dream.
The five are here: the heralds of the apocalypse.
Deacon's file confirms everything I feared.
The end's coming, Shadow Man.
An ancient prophecy tells of the return of a great evil to Deadside.
A terrible force gathering dark souls to its darker heart
and using their power to cross over into this world and bring about apocalypse.
>> SHADOW MAN: I must stop this evil from bringing about the end of all things.
>> NETTIE: Only you can do it, Shadow Man.
You are the walker between the worlds.
I can't go Deadside and Jaunty's next to useless in both worlds.
You are the only one who can do anything about this.
>> SHADOW MAN: As it ever was.
>> NETTIE: But you ain't never confronted anything like this evil.
It's so pure not even the ancient protectors of the dark souls could destroy it.
They could only banish it from Deadside.
They knew it'd come back one day, hence the prophecy telling of its return.
The power of the ancients is all but gone now
and the dark souls that evil desires lie unprotected.
What you go to do, Shadow Man, is to go Deadside and recover the dark souls.
Take them into your own protection before evil gathers them to its terrible heart.
>> SHADOW MAN: OK, so let me get this straight.
If I don't recover these dark souls then the world's going to end. Am I right?
>> NETTIE: You got it.
>> SHADOW MAN: Shit.
>> NETTIE: Look, I got to go. I've got a lot to do.
Take Deacon's file and meet me at dawn at the church on the hill.
I've kept your stuff safe for you.
>> SHADOW MAN: I hate this shit.
Just a pawn in Nettie's master plan.
She moves me in mysterious ways, and brother, sometimes she really does move me.
>> RYAN: Ho ho!
>> SHADOW MAN: Can't do nothing about it since, nice as you plase, she knitted my ribs into
the Mask of Shadows.
I got nothing left, anyways.
It's my fault Luke's dead, and mom and pop too.
I deserve everything I get.
Every bad thing that comes my way.
Can't live, can't die...
Deadside's the perfect hood for me.
A nowhere place.
The asshole of the universe.
>> RYAN: Would you believe me if I told you that they somehow crammed all of that cut-scene
into the Nintendo 64 one too?
>> SHADOW MAN: Now where the hell is that church?
>> RYAN: I remember seeing this when I was cocking about earlier.
OK!
So...
Church.
Churches are important.
Churches are where my stuff is kept.
And I like my stuff I think.
That looks like the church over there.
[swamp animal noises]
[wood cracks]
Seriously?
[swamp animal noises]
[more swamp animal noises]
Oh yeah, that's right.
When I was... you guys would probably enjoy this.
I, uh...
What button did I push to do that...
I drowned myself earlier.
I think it was on the Nintendo 64 one which is a bit less, uh, a bit more picky.
But, uh... I drowned myself in these pools of water.
It was embarrassing. It was horrible.
By rolling around in it, I drowned. It was... rather hilarious.
Anyway, I think I better, uh, you know, make that a video before something interesting
happens.
You come back, now!
You come back soon!
Something interesting will happen, for the kingdom!