Jon Benjamin LIVE with Beth Hoyt - 8/8/12 (Full Ep)


Uploaded by MyDamnChannel on 08.08.2012

Transcript:

BETH HOYT: That's a good margarita.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
BETH HOYT: Hi, guys.
It's me, Beth Hoyt, and welcome to another episode of
My Damn Channel LIVE.
We've got a jam-packed show today, with lots of video
premieres, including the latest episode of Status Kill
and a very special Save the Supers bonus episode featuring
Felicia Day, and even some new Gilbert Gottfried for you.
But now it's time to welcome our first guest.
He's the star of Bob's Burgers on Fox.
He's on Archer on FX, and the creator of Jon Benjamin Has a
Van on Comedy Central.
You guys, please welcome Jon Benjamin.
JON BENJAMIN: Hi, hi.
BETH HOYT: Hi.
JON BENJAMIN: Thanks for having me.
BETH HOYT: Hi, Jon.
JON BENJAMIN: How are you?
BETH HOYT: I'm--
I'm--
I'm great.
I am--
I mean, I'm surprised.
I've never seen you in per-- this is a surprise to me, yes.
JON BENJAMIN: Yes, I am--
BETH HOYT: You're wearing a, um--
JON BENJAMIN: I am bald, yes.
BETH HOYT: You know, I knew that.
But not quite.
But this is the--
JON BENJAMIN: Well, I'm definitely receding.
BETH HOYT: The thing that's really just sticking out to me
that's shocking--
JON BENJAMIN: Oh, the chin dildo.
BETH HOYT: The chin dil-- is that what it's--
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: Is that what we're going with?
JON BENJAMIN: Well, I'm going around promoting my movie,
Chin Dildo, so--
BETH HOYT: Oh!
JON BENJAMIN: --that's why I'm wearing it.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
I didn't know.
JON BENJAMIN: It's really riding up right now.
BETH HOYT: Oh my.
Is that--
JON BENJAMIN: It's [INAUDIBLE].
BETH HOYT: OK, so you're promoting a film that's called
Chin Dildo?
JON BENJAMIN: Yes, a film I just made, Chin Dildo, which
hasn't had a release.
It doesn't have a release date yet.
It's an independent film.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, so--
BETH HOYT: Wow.
JON BENJAMIN: --I have to wear it for promotion.
BETH HOYT: OK, sure.
That's part of the--
JON BENJAMIN: I'm not totally into doing it this way, but
I'm really proud of the film.
BETH HOYT: It sure is intriguing.
It sure makes it intriguing.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, it's a little gimmicky for me, but
I'm fine to do it because I think the film is great.
And so I'm happy to promote it.
BETH HOYT: You're--
I mean, you're seeming na--
natural with it.
JON BENJAMIN: Well, yeah.
I mean, I have a lot of practice, because filming was
about seven weeks.
And--
BETH HOYT: Wow.
JON BENJAMIN: --I was wearing it pretty much the whole time,
except when I slept.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: Actually, we have a clip, I'm hearing.
And I would love to see this, because again, I've never
heard of this film.
I'm sorry, I was unaware.
So would you like to set up this clip for us?
JON BENJAMIN: Oh, sure.
I think the clip you're gonna see, basically it takes place
in Upstate New York.
And this scene, I think, is pretty bad times have fallen
upon this family, this Frank Gormand, who I
play, and his wife.
And they have two kids.
And this scene, I think, is an argument between my wife,
played by Ann Carr.
BETH HOYT: OK.
Let's take a look at it.
JON BENJAMIN: It's when things are going really-- starting to
really go down.
BETH HOYT: Oh, well, I'm sure.
Here's a scene from Chin Dildo.
ANN CARR: I--
I--
I just don't know anymore.
I feel like everything's slipping away.
JON BENJAMIN: Because it is slipping away, Charlotte.
That's the whole [BLEEP]
point.
It's a fucking mess, all right?
But you just want everything perfect.
ANN CARR: You're not listening to me!
You're not listening to me!
JON BENJAMIN: And you expect it to be that way!
ANN CARR: That's not what I want.
JON BENJAMIN: That's what you've been doing!
That's what you've been doing!
ANN CARR: [CRYING]
JON BENJAMIN: You wanted this whole thing in the first
place, because you think I can't do it, right?
Because I'm--
because I'm a [BLEEP]
mess.
Because Frank's a [BLEEP]
mess.

ANN CARR: Frank.
I can't anymore.
JON BENJAMIN: All right.

Charlotte, maybe I'm--
I'm pushing you away because I'm afraid I'm gonna fail.
ANN CARR: So don't push me away.
JON BENJAMIN: Come here.

ANN CARR: Love you, babe.

JON BENJAMIN: I'm sorry.

ANN CARR: OK, babe.
JON BENJAMIN: All right.
I'm gonna go check on the kids.
They've been crying a lot.

BETH HOYT: Wow.
That is not a comedy.
JON BENJAMIN: No, no.
BETH HOYT: I'm really surprised.
I was expecting a comedy.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, no, it's really the story about this
family in Upstate.
We shot in Poughkeepsie.
And sort of they got caught in the midst of the subprime
mortgage crisis, and it hit them very hard.
And the house is being foreclosed on.
And it's really just about the American Dream falling apart.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
Wow.
But then also you're wearing--
then also the chin dildo.
JON BENJAMIN: The chin dildo is not a huge part of the
movie, even though I'm wearing it the whole time.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: OK.
It's just the title of the film, and it just adds on.
That's just why I thought it was a comedy.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, it's something that the director,
Felix Gordonstein--
who's a brilliant young director and wrote the film--
something that he decided on.
I'm not sure why.
But we talked about it a lot.
And I think there's something about a metaphor.
BETH HOYT: OK.
I haven't heard of him, so I guess a new career for this
young director.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, he's very, very young.
I think he's, like, 15.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
I'm sure that'll also help the press.
That's an interesting--
I mean, that makes the movie even more intriguing.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
But I think he'll be a huge--
he started making movies when he was, I
don't know, like, two.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
JON BENJAMIN: You know, like, short films.
So he's like a little Spielberg kind of kid.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
Was that what you drew you to this film?
Is he [INAUDIBLE] the role?
JON BENJAMIN: Well, I wanted to play a dramatic role.
I definitely wanted to break out.
I've sort of traditionally done comedy, and so I think
this was a good chance for me.
And when I read the script and when I saw the title, I was
really intrigued, because I do own the chin dildo, so--
BETH HOYT: Oh, really?
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
This actually was mine.
We used mine in the movie.
BETH HOYT: Really?
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: So then this must be comfortable for you.
Can I just feel just how tight this is?
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, it's tight.
BETH HOYT: Oh, that sure is.
It's really on there.
JON BENJAMIN: It's not--
BETH HOYT: Whoa, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to--
JON BENJAMIN: It's all right.
It's not form-fitted for me.
I mean, this is generally the way they come.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
I didn't know.
It's news.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
It definitely got uncomfortable while shooting,
because we did long days and--
BETH HOYT: Oh, sure.
JON BENJAMIN: --we'd have to wear it the whole time.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
It probably made a little implantation
on your skin there.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
And there's sort of a TMJ [INAUDIBLE].
BETH HOYT: It's like being in a period piece and wearing a
corset all day long or something like that.
Here, we have some copy for you.
I think it's about your film.
I think you should read that.
It has your name on top of it.
JON BENJAMIN: Oh, yeah.
But if people want to support us, the film, Chin Dildo, they
should visit www.chindildothemovie.com.
And you can download a high-res copy of our poster
and show it to your friends or hang it up in your bedroom or
in the bathroom, or hang it up around town.
And just help us get the word out about Chin Dildo and about
independent film in general.
I think we need to support--
BETH HOYT: Absolutely.
JON BENJAMIN: --independent movies.
BETH HOYT: I see that you've already been at some festivals
and gotten some good acclaim so far.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: How are the audiences in those screenings?
JON BENJAMIN: They've been really supportive, although
very small.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
Sure.
So is this a family film?
Is this something you can bring the kids to?
JON BENJAMIN: I wouldn't say it's a family film.
But I'd say if you--
BETH HOYT: Sure, because of the, um--
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
But I don't think if you were, like, seven or eight, you'd
know what this is.
BETH HOYT: Sure.
JON BENJAMIN: So I think you would just ask, and then the
parents would come up with some--
BETH HOYT: Then you'd be forced into it too soon.
JON BENJAMIN: It's not necessarily a movie I would
say a kid would like.
But I think later in life, if you saw it when you're nine,
and then when you turn 18 you'd find out what chin
dildos are, you'd laugh about that.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
JON BENJAMIN: Like, oh my god, I remember that movie.
BETH HOYT: That's true.
Oh, I see that you're working it into your everyday life.
This is really exciting, and really something.
I'm excited to see you in a dramatic role.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: And I'm sure you guys have questions for Jon
Benjamin about Chin Dildo.
I do.
Or maybe about Bob's Burgers or Archer or anything else.
We'll be talking with you guys right after this.

[MUSIC PLAYING]
GOD: No, no, no.
That's not for you.
I mean, I guess if you want.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

MALE SPEAKER: If you guys are going to stick around for a
little while, keep rolling, because I could use this as an
instructional video.
And there's some positions I may want to check out later.
Just hold the front of the pole there.
Baby, just hold the front of the pole.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Oh, sorry.
MALE SPEAKER: Come down.
Come down, and slide the pole.
Oh, great.

BETH HOYT: Right, we're back with Jon Benjamin.
Let's take some of your questions and stuff.
But first up is a comment from YouTube.
And this is from grassyassmariana.
"oh no a coworker just saw this on my screen.
what do I do?"
Well, I mean, once she contextualizes it for a
coworker, telling her, I think as I thought,
she assumed it was--
you know, she just saw the dildo and made assumptions.
JON BENJAMIN: Well, it depends on where she works.
I think if she works at a chin dildo factory--
BETH HOYT: That's a really good point.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: That's a really good point.
So then she could say, I'm doing research.
JON BENJAMIN: Right.
Or then she could be proud.
Or I don't know, it depends on where you work.
BETH HOYT: That's true.
We need more context for that answer.
Next comment from YouTube is from Danielle Marie.
"did you ever meet hugh laurie from house?"
JON BENJAMIN: Is that for you or for me?
BETH HOYT: For you?
JON BENJAMIN: That's for me.
BETH HOYT: Well, I'll just say, I haven't.
JON BENJAMIN: Why?
Why do you ask that?
I don't get it.
BETH HOYT: She just really wants the two of you to meet.
Maybe you're supposed to meet.
JON BENJAMIN: I've never met Hugh Laurie from House.
BETH HOYT: Well, maybe you should.
JON BENJAMIN: No.
I've never even seen House.
BETH HOYT: Maybe you should meet him and then
tell us about it.
JON BENJAMIN: All right.
BETH HOYT: OK, next comment from YouTube is from
Doughboy072.
"Oh!
Ask Jon if he ever plans on producing a Home Movies
feature film."
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, when I make $5 million.
BETH HOYT: So go see Chin Dildo, everyone.
JON BENJAMIN: Well, yeah.
I mean, obviously Chin Dildo is a movie that
can break out big.
And I do own a piece of it.
But if I did, I wouldn't take the money to make a Home
Movies movie.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
I would do something fun with it, like, I don't know.
BETH HOYT: Like what?
JON BENJAMIN: I don't know, like have a
cash bonfire or party.
BETH HOYT: Oh, fun.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, I'd buy a house and then
burn cash in the back.
BETH HOYT: That's a great plan.
So again, go see Chin Dildo.
Next up is a Tumblr question from katieiscreepy.
"what ever happened to jon benjamin has a van? that shit
was funny." That shit was funny.
JON BENJAMIN: It wasn't funny enough.
It got cancelled.
BETH HOYT: To the certain people.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
So that shit was not funny.
BETH HOYT: But to me and katieiscreepy, and a lot of
us, it was.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, no, I wanted to do more of them, but
they said no.
And they--
BETH HOYT: They have the money that you need to burn.
OK, Twitter question is from BudCort, Brian Mann.
"How does Jon pass the time when he's on set?" Oh, that's
a good question.
There's so much waiting around.
JON BENJAMIN: Well, specifically on Chin Dildo, it
was a pretty intense movie, so everything was really heavy
when we were doing it.
So we would definitely try and lighten
things up when we stopped.
So we would smoke a lot of pot.
And then we would do stuff fun with the-- we used
to play ring toss.
BETH HOYT: On this?
JON BENJAMIN: Yes.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
I We have a bunch of toys and games here, and
we have some rings.
[INAUDIBLE].
Thank you.
Right here.
JON BENJAMIN: Wow, you have--
BETH HOYT: Can we?
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
BETH HOYT: Can we play this?
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: I mean, we like to play games here.
JON BENJAMIN: Well, basically, the way we did it--
BETH HOYT: Cool.
JON BENJAMIN: --was you'd toss the ring.
BETH HOYT: So I'll stand back here.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
So I would go, like-- yeah.
I'll do this.
BETH HOYT: Oh, my.
Oh, wow, just sticking it right up there.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: This is great.
Oh, my gosh.
So this is also very Olympic-y.
I mean, I'm really into sports.
JON BENJAMIN: So three and you win, basically.
BETH HOYT: All right.
These won't hurt.
They're really sort.
JON BENJAMIN: But I can't stay here.
This lying is really tensing my muscles.
BETH HOYT: Well, it might take me a long
time to get to three.
So you said--
JON BENJAMIN: Well, just throw one.
BETH HOYT: You said up to three.
JON BENJAMIN: Because why are you waiting?
BETH HOYT: OK, I just prepared myself.
Here, we have a Twitter question.
Yes!
JON BENJAMIN: Nice, nice.
BETH HOYT: Do we leave it there?
Yeah.
This is from lizzzzz.
"who has been your favorite character to voice? mine is
definitely Mixed Vegetables from Wet Hot American Summer."
Can of Vegetables.
JON BENJAMIN: Oh, I should stay?
BETH HOYT: No.
We can make it easier on you.
Let's try it this way.
JON BENJAMIN: I would say--
BETH HOYT: I did get that one, though.
You guys saw that.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, that was good.
One out of two.
BETH HOYT: Thanks.
JON BENJAMIN: One out of two.
BETH HOYT: Oh, my.
JON BENJAMIN: I would say--
BETH HOYT: It's so shocking when it looks at
you straight on.
JON BENJAMIN: Can of Vegetables was the least
amount of work I've ever had to do, because it was, like,
three lines.
So I liked that.
That was good.
BETH HOYT: That's a good day at work.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: Our next comment from YouTube is from PSdanidi.
"did u get a tan line from the straps? it seems like you
would-- since it's summer--"
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, well, we shot it in the winter.
So fuck you.
BETH HOYT: Watch out, though, on this press tour.
You know?
If you're walking around.
I don't know if you're putting it on at
home and then traveling.
And you biked here, right?
JON BENJAMIN: I did, but I didn't bike.
When I have to do publicity for the movie, I'll put it on.
Like, I put it on before.
I didn't wear it out.
BETH HOYT: Oh, I just wasn't sure how long this takes.
JON BENJAMIN: It takes two minutes to put on, or less.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
I suppose you're getting probably better at it.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
I mean, sometimes I can put it on, like, really quickly.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
OK, so one thing I want to talk to you about is some
breaking news from yesterday on Archer and
Bob's Burgers crossover.
Can you tell us anything about that?
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: It's really exciting.
JON BENJAMIN: It is gonna be I think the first episode when
Archer premieres that Archer is--

it starts with him being--
I don't want to give the whole thing away, but I guess I just
did, right?
BETH HOYT: No.
That's good to know.
It's the first episode of Archer when it premieres?
JON BENJAMIN: It's basically like a Bourne
Identity kind of thing--
BETH HOYT: Oh, cool.
JON BENJAMIN: --where it starts with
Bob, but it's Archer.
And Archer works in the hamburger store?
BETH HOYT: That's exciting.
JON BENJAMIN: Hamburger place.
And he's dressed like Bob.
And he has a wife who's played by John Roberts, who is my
wife on Bob's Burgers.
BETH HOYT: Sure, Linda.
JON BENJAMIN: Then he has to try and find out-- excuse me.
I had a lot of seltzer.
BETH HOYT: Oh, I know.
I go through that, too.
JON BENJAMIN: Then he has to try and find out why.
He realizes he's incredibly adept at
spy skills and fighting.
And he tries to find out why he--
BETH HOYT: Now you're starting to give us the whole--
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, I did.
Sorry.
BETH HOYT: But I did read the stuff before that online, so
you didn't give away that.
JON BENJAMIN: I was the one who gave that away, too.
And I just hope people aren't--
BETH HOYT: No, that's good.
We want that.
We want to be told the exciting things.
So I can't wait to see that.
JON BENJAMIN: I think it is exciting.
I'm gonna give my dildo a little--
BETH HOYT: Oh.
JON BENJAMIN: Like that.
BETH HOYT: It doesn't ruin it?
JON BENJAMIN: Mmm.
BETH HOYT: Oh, OK.
JON BENJAMIN: I just like to water the tip a little bit,
because it looks better on camera a little shiny.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, some people are used to
seeing it that way.
JON BENJAMIN: And then see the drip?
See that?
BETH HOYT: Mmm.
Wow.
That's fantastic that you came here and promoted this here.
This is really exciting news.
You guys, help get the word out about Chin Dildo.
Visit chindildothemovie.com.
Download the high-res copy of the movie poster and watch
that amazing clip from the film we showed you earlier.
We're going to be giving away a signed copy as well, but
you'll have to wait until the end of the show
for details on that.
Thank you so much for being here, Jon.
JON BENJAMIN: Yeah, thank you very much.
BETH HOYT: It was really nice.
JON BENJAMIN: It was really great.
BETH HOYT: OK.
Thanks.
JON BENJAMIN: You're welcome.
BETH HOYT: OK.
JON BENJAMIN: It was nice to-- um--
BETH HOYT: I bruise easily.
JON BENJAMIN: Sorry.
Obviously, it's like--
BETH HOYT: It was kinda hard.
JON BENJAMIN: --hard to work with.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, that was difficult.
I apprec-- that was-- thank you for being here.
JON BENJAMIN: I mean, I can take it off.
BETH HOYT: Oh, thanks.
OK.
Oh, that was better.
OK, you guys love Save the Supers, right?
Of course you do.
What if I told we had a special Save the Supers bonus
video starring Felicia Day in the cat suit.
Did I break the internet with the dildo and the cat suit?
OK, let's get to it.
This is Panthera, you guys.

FELICIA DAY: On the Parthenon, the columns must be
purrr-pendicular.
FLEET FOOT: Oh, I can use my laser level
that I bought on SkyMall.
All right, let's see.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

[MUSIC PLAYING]
FLEET FOOT: That was weird.

FELICIA DAY: Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.

FLEET FOOT: Mmm.
FELICIA DAY: Yum.
FLEET FOOT: Mmm.
FELICIA DAY: Yum.
FLEET FOOT: Mmm, mmm.
FELICIA DAY: Yum, yum, yum.
FLEET FOOT: Mmm.
It does taste better this way.
FELICIA DAY: Mm-hm.
MAD TAGGER: [GASPS]
Oh, I'm the Mad Tagger, and you're watching My Damn
Channel LIVE.

BETH HOYT: OK, a cat suit definitely helps if you're a
superhero or supervillain, I get that.
I don't have a cool suit like that, but I do have a lobster.
I have a lobster.
And my lobster gives me special abilities.
Like, when I'm wearing her--
it's a she--
I have the power of 10 small crustaceans.
So basically imagine the power of 10 lobsters, and you can
see what we're dealing with here.
What basically that does for me is I am scared of lobsters,
so imagine how scary I am right now to me.
Also wearing the lobster, it allows me to know when I'm
moving around too much because it rattles.
And it kind of just creeps up on just how scared I am.
I'm suppressing all my fear, and I'm just too scared.
OK.
Working on it, you guys.
Up next is another familiar face on My Damn Channel LIVE,
but a very different voice.
And thank God for that, because Aladdin, it just
wouldn't have been the same without this man.
We love him.
We love his hilarious views on things circling the web.
Here's the latest Gilbert Gets It.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
GILBERT GOTTFRIED: Hey, folks.
Gilbert Gottfried here.
So there's this company that for $10,000 will launch your
DNA into space as an interplanetary backup.
I get it, you're smart enough to plan ahead, but incredibly
stupid enough to think that Martians are going to
want to clone you.
One small step for man, one giant waste of money for
self-involved douchebags.
There should be a money-back guarantee.
If in 50 million years the Earth is destroyed and an
alien race doesn't regrow you, you'll get a full refund.
And why even spend $10,000?
I shoot my DNA into the air for just the cost of my
internet connection.
Meanwhile in California, the world's heaviest woman is
crediting sex with her ex-husband with helping her
lose 100 pounds.
That Sacramento woman tipped the scales at 643 pounds.
But thanks to sex up to six times a day, she's lost almost
two Olsen twins.
When asked how it was going, her ex-husband said, for god's
sakes, let me be on top for once.
Look, I get it.
When you and your hubby divorced, you said you wanted
to bury him.
But does that mean it has to be under you?
The last six men this woman had sex
with are still missing.
What happened to traditional weight-loss methods, like
willpower and bulimia?
Finally, an Italian company has developed men's underwear
that enhances the roundness and tightness of the buttocks.
Just what every man needs, a badonkadonk booty.
Look, I get it.
You want to show off your ass to distract from how
tiny your penis is.
This is the perfect gift for fathers everywhere.
Why not get him the ass he wishes your mother still had.
Just make sure if you buy one of these you
don't commit any crimes.
This is not the underwear you want to have on when you're
sent to prison.
I'm Gilbert Gottfried.
Follow me on Twitter, and enjoy life.
But try not to be too stupid, OK?
[MUSIC PLAYING]
BETH HOYT: Gilber Gottfried, you guys.
I like those underwears.
And hey, look who's here.
It's the star of Status Kill, Ayinde Howell.
AYINDE HOWELL: Ahh!
BETH HOYT: Your aura, it just blew me out of here.
AYINDE HOWELL: Yeah, [INAUDIBLE].
BETH HOYT: Ayinde, thank you so much for coming by.
AYINDE HOWELL: Thanks for having me, Beth.
BETH HOYT: You're welcome.
I know our last episode of Status Kill was about how
annoying Facebook invites are.
AYINDE HOWELL: Oh, god, I hate those.
BETH HOYT: But I really have some good ones.
I just want to make sure that-- because I don't think
we are Facebook friends yet.
AYINDE HOWELL: No, we're not.
BETH HOYT: I just want to make sure you get my invite.
AYINDE HOWELL: Well, we could just be--
BETH HOYT: I'm just gonna--
AYINDE HOWELL: Whoa, whoa.
We could just be real friends, though.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, but it's just so much easier to send the
Facebook invites.
AYINDE HOWELL: But I'm here, though.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, but then I want to make sure you know the
details of the invite.
So I'm just gonna add you.
I have about--
I'm gonna add you to the five groups that I want to add you
to, just to send you invites.
So if you want to tease up the new episode that
they're about to see--
AYINDE HOWELL: OK, sure.
So in this episode of Status Kill, my character, Denton
Sparks, is trying to capture the evil villain called the
Mad Tagger.
It's pretty intense, so check it out.
BETH HOYT: OK, so I've got you in four different groups.
AYINDE HOWELL: Dude, just.
BETH HOYT: It's gonna be--
AYINDE HOWELL: No.
BETH HOYT: Updates from me are gonna be coming.
Enjoy the video.
We'll be back.
AYINDE HOWELL: Getting tagged in a photo that you might not
want anyone else to see is ridiculous.
And it needs to stop.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
FEMALE SPEAKER: Agent Sparks, your mission is to capture the
Mad Tagger.
If you get tagged and your cover is blown,
you're as good as dead.
DENTON SPARKS: Copy.
MAD TAGGER: That's the funniest thing
that I've ever seen.
And now you will forever be in my database.
Think there'll be consequences?
You think [INAUDIBLE] that they picked on me?
Well, there are, because now I have your photos.
You're tagged.
You, you, and especially you, Martha.
Martha, Martha.
Jeffery, Jeffery Quinn.
39 years old, a loser still.
Lives with his parents.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Tagged.
MAD TAGGER: Uh-oh.
Big Bad Randy Knox.
Big Bad Randy Knox thought he could take my lunch money.
Well, guess what, sucker.
You've been tagged.

[ALARM]
MAD TAGGER: Got you.
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.

Oh yes, oh yes.
Oh no.
Well, look who it is.
FEMALE SPEAKER: You've been tagged in a photo.
MAD TAGGER: I got ya.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Is this you?
Should I post this on your wall?
MAD TAGGER: [INAUDIBLE].
FEMALE SPEAKER: Do you need a moment to decide?
You have 60 seconds to untag.
MAD TAGGER: I control the photos, not you.
I control the photos.
FEMALE SPEAKER: 50 seconds to untag.

40 seconds to untag.
MAD TAGGER: You can't escape the Mad Tagger.
More, more, every tag, everyone I tag.
Tag, tag, tag, tag, tag, tag.
FEMALE SPEAKER: 30 seconds to untag.
MAD TAGGER: Oh, oh, look at this fat ass
walking down the street.
[LAUGHS]
Oh, the tags keep on rolling by.
Everybody gets tagged.
FEMALE SPEAKER: 20 seconds to untag.
MAD TAGGER: [LAUGHS]

FEMALE SPEAKER: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
You have been untagged.

You've been tagged, tagged, tagged, been
tagged, been tagged.
MAD TAGGER: You camera whore.

BETH HOYT: Wow, what an episode.
So that episode of Status Kill is over, even though it
doesn't look like it, because you're
still looking at Ayinde.
AYINDE HOWELL: I'm--
BETH HOYT: Guess what, he's really here, you guys.
AYINDE HOWELL: Yeah, that's--
BETH HOYT: Sorry.
AYINDE HOWELL: --unnecessary.
BETH HOYT: To prove it, let's look at a comment or two, and
then he'll answer.
And then you'll know that he's live, rather than me just
hitting him.
Here's a comment from YouTube.
And this is from sexyanimator.
"Ayinde, aside from acting what do you like to do?"
AYINDE HOWELL: I'm actually also a professional chef.
BETH HOYT: Really?
AYINDE HOWELL: Yes.
BETH HOYT: Actually, I heard this.
And I heard you're a vegan chef.
AYINDE HOWELL: Yeah, I'm a vegan chef.
BETH HOYT: That's really incredible.
AYINDE HOWELL: Highly specialized.
Matter of fact--
BETH HOYT: Are you vegan?
AYINDE HOWELL: I am a vegan as well.
Been a vegan all my life.
I know that's weird.
You can poke me again to make sure I'm actually real.
BETH HOYT: He didn't fall over, you guys.
AYINDE HOWELL: I didn't.
BETH HOYT: He's been vegan all his life.
AYINDE HOWELL: I am not a stick.
Yeah, lot of good stuff happening on that front, too.
BETH HOYT: Cool.
What's your favorite thing to make?
AYINDE HOWELL: I'm a breakfast guy.
I love waffles, because you know, I like the ladies, too--
so, breakfast.
BETH HOYT: Oh, I see.
AYINDE HOWELL: You know what I'm talking about?
BETH HOYT: I see, getting the whole package there.
That's good.
OK, here's another comment from YouTube.
This is from PSdanidi. "when people like stupid photos--
and its all over you're status feed" I don't--
do you understand this?
AYINDE HOWELL: No.
Can we see that again?
BETH HOYT: Can we see that again?
What's the spa-- what's the--
AYINDE HOWELL: When people--
BETH HOYT: What's with this bar at the end?
AYINDE HOWELL: Is that a blank stare?
BETH HOYT: OK, "when people like stupid photos-- and its
all over you're status feed"
AYINDE HOWELL: I think that's blank stare.
BETH HOYT: I'm gonna give it a blank stare, too.
AYINDE HOWELL: Let's both do a blank stare.
Here we go.
BETH HOYT: I think we nailed it.
AYINDE HOWELL: Nice, nice.
BETH HOYT: OK.
So where did you shoot that in that factory?
AYINDE HOWELL: Upstate New York.
BETH HOYT: Cool.
AYINDE HOWELL: Yeah, crazy.
BETH HOYT: That's very interesting.
OK, you guys, so that episode takes tagging to a whole new
level of annoyance.
We can all relate.
Ayinde has compiled a list of the worst
kind of Facebook tags.
Let's take a look at them.
The first one is when you're accidentally in the background
of a picture.
Gosh, it's like those are your people, their arms around each
other, smiling, and you're at the side, staring
or eating, of course.
And just because you're there doesn't mean you need to be
tagged in the picture.
AYINDE HOWELL: That apple good?
Number two, the unflattering photo.
Just because a camera takes a picture doesn't mean it needs
to live on Facebook forever with my name attached to--
BETH HOYT: Why?
I mean, you're coughing.
AYINDE HOWELL: Why?
BETH HOYT: Let's leave it off.
OK, number three.
Any picture taken of me after 2:00 AM.
If you think I won't remember it happening, just don't tag
me on Facebook with it.
Don't do that.
Oh, there's one of you.
AYINDE HOWELL: Whoa.
Number four.
BETH HOYT: Swilling it.
AYINDE HOWELL: The phantom tag.
Look, it seems like it was a great time.
Wish I had been there, but it's pretty clear I wasn't.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, so you're tagged in the sun there.
That's not--
AYINDE HOWELL: Yeah.
BETH HOYT: Would have been cool if that--
AYINDE HOWELL: I'm someone's son, but I'm not--
BETH HOYT: That's so weird when that happens.
And number five is the mistag.
Does that look like me?
I mean, I'm flattered, but that's clearly Mememolly.
So that always happens.
Ayinde, thanks for being here, leading us through that.
AYINDE HOWELL: Thank you for having me.
BETH HOYT: We love you in Status Kill.
AYINDE HOWELL: I love My Damn Channel.
I'll say it again.
I love My Damn Channel.
BETH HOYT: We'll say it again.
I hope that in some episode, you get to kill.
AYINDE HOWELL: Well, yeah.
Well, we have to watch it and see.
There is a lot more coming up.
The rest of the season is effing amazing.
BETH HOYT: Yeah, I can't wait.
I have no doubt.
And good luck on all the cheffing.
And you guys--
AYINDE HOWELL: Thank you.
BETH HOYT: --you can watch all the Status Kills on
mydamnchannel.com.
Up next is another My Damn Channel original premiere,
right now from Junior Varsity, Linked Out series, this is
"Intimate Broadcast."
AYINDE HOWELL: Agh.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
FEMALE SPEAKER: What do you want to do?
I probably shouldn't have called him over.
MALE SPEAKER: I don't care.
I'm about to make a half-baby in my pants.
[BABY GIGGLE]
MALE SPEAKER: Boob touch.
FEMALE SPEAKER: I don't want to become a lonely cat lady.
[MEOW]
MALE SPEAKER: I hope she can't tell I'm a virgin.
I got a little treat for you.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Yeah?
MALE SPEAKER: Oh, oh.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Oh, ah.
I could be watching Law and Order right now.

MALE SPEAKER: I should have just shown up naked.
Oh, oh.
FEMALE SPEAKER: OK.
MALE SPEAKER: Shit.
FEMALE SPEAKER: OK.

MALE SPEAKER: Come on, come on.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Ouch.
MALE SPEAKER: Come on.
FEMALE SPEAKER: I should have played with my pet rabbit.
[VIBRATION SOUND]
MALE SPEAKER: You wanna help me out?
FEMALE SPEAKER: Yeah.
MALE SPEAKER: Unleash the beast.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Do you have a condom?
MALE SPEAKER: Yes.
How the hell do you put one on?
FEMALE SPEAKER: Go get it.
I don't want you to catch my depression.

MALE SPEAKER: What the fuck.
I'm gonna put it in, OK?
FEMALE SPEAKER: Ow.
MALE SPEAKER: Ah.
I'm sorry.
That was my bad.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Epic fail.
MALE SPEAKER: Is it in?
For the win.
[WHISTLE]
FEMALE SPEAKER: Oh yeah, give it to me.
MALE SPEAKER: Now tell me how hot I am.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Oh, you're so smokin'.
I'd like to thank the Academy.
[APPLAUSE]
FEMALE SPEAKER: Oh, baby.
MALE SPEAKER: I feel like you're inside of me.
[SQUEAKING]
FEMALE SPEAKER: OK.
MALE SPEAKER: Think baseball.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Oh god.
I'm adopting 10 cats tomorrow.
[MEOW]
MALE SPEAKER: What are you doing for the
rest of your life?
I wonder what our kids will look like.

JERRY: Darling, did you know we're live right now?
FEMALE SPEAKER: I did.
It's fantastic, Jerry.
MALE SPEAKER: You know what else is fantastic?
I had the boys in the back rig up this virtual sensor bar I
can throw across your mouth if you want to start swearing.
FEMALE SPEAKER: Oh.
JERRY: What's your favorite cuss word?
FEMALE SPEAKER: Well, fu--
JERRY: I'm so sorry.
I'm terribly sorry.

BETH HOYT: That's our show today, you guys.
Thank you to Ayinde Howell for stopping by.
Thanks again to Jon Benjamin.
Everyone, go see Chin Dildo.
Please support our artists.
And go to our Twitter pages now to find out about our Chin
Dildo poster giveaway.
Otay, tomorrow--
Otay.
Tomorrow, Daily Grace is here with the YouTube star,
SoundlyAwake.
We've got our weekly ep up on Friday.
Next Wednesday is our final Olympic blowout show, you
guys, featuring Chris Gethard and many of his cohorts from
The Chris Gethard Show, along with Dan Rollman and the folks
at RecordSetter.
We're going to be breaking records and
making dreams come true.
Thanks for watching.
Bye, guys.
[MUSIC PLAYING]