Beth responds to your comments LIVE! - 7/10/12 (Full Ep)


Uploaded by MyDamnChannel on 10.07.2012

Transcript:

BETH HOYT: What?
Oh, what's that?
What?
Oh my gosh.
It's dirty.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
-Oh, I didn't see you.
Just kidding, I saw you.
Just kidding.
I can't see you.
That--
that's not how cameras work, Just kidding, that is how they
work if you're Skyping.
Just kidding.
I don't understand how Skype works.
That's-- that's all magic to me.
What?
OK, enough kidding.
Let's hang out.
You guys, it's me.
It's Beth Hoyt.
Just hanging on a Tuesday.
That sounds like a bad line from an '80s pop song.
Right?
You with me?
I'm hanging on a Tuesday.
Hanging by a thread.
Boo.
Wow.
That is--
that is a bad song.
I am-- aren't you guys so glad that was never actually
written and recorded?
Wow, that would have ended bad.
It would probably still play on the radio on '80s on 8:00.
So thank goodness that that's not happening.
We're going to spend some time today
responding to your comments.
But first, let's check out a little vid, which is a cool
way I like to shorten the word "video."
I'm sorry, I'm still talking to children.
Remember that from yesterday?
I'm still doing that.
I apologize for treating you like two-year-olds.
OK, this vid is called Co-op of the Damned.
It's a Co-op of the Damned video.
It's called "Rosemary's Other Baby."
-Hey, silly.
This was in the bedroom.
-Oh, how goofy.
[DOORBELL RINGING]
-Oh, guests.
-Hi, welcome to the building.
-Thanks.
I'm Shawn.
This is Carol.
And you are some sort of cult?
-Accurate.
-Tell me, have you and your wife
considered having a child?
-You mean like for you guys?
You guys are satanists!
-Totally.
Count us in.
-Just like that.
-Shawn, can you imagine me carrying the spawn of Satan?
-Your sister is going to be so jealous.
Let's call her now.
-Yeah.
-That felt a little too easy.

[DOORBELL RINGING]
-Hey, look who's here, guys.
Who wants snickerdoodles?
-We thought now might be a good time to talk about
logistics and stuff.
-Yeah, like when your boss is going to go to town on my
fertile crescent.
-Also, have you guys talked about baby names yet?
-Uh, we're pretty set on Damian.
-OK.
Sure.
Yeah, we could trickle back to that.
-OK.
Well, we should go actually.
-Oh, where you going?
-We have this thing that we do.
-Oh, OK.
Did you get my ovulation calendar I sent you?
-Oh my god.

CAROL (OFFSCREEN): Never too early to think about it.
-Guys.

-OK, so once you have the baby, we'll take it from
there, simple as that.
-What the hell is going on here.
-Ew.
-Yeah, who's the shiksha?
-How the hell did you get in here?
-Are you guys backing out?
Shawn, do something.
-Just explain what's going on.
-All right.
Jesus Christ.
We looked into it and the mother of Satan's baby can't
have gone to ASU.
-It's the number one party school.
-And then on Facebook you friended the, uh--
-Extreme Couponing.
-Twice.
-I like that show.
-And you put that out that outfit and you looked at
yourself in the mirror this morning, and you thought, yes.
-Why are you so afraid of looking pretty?
-And do you know your SAT variables are lower than your
credit rating?
-And snickerdoodles.
Really?
Do we look like Mennonites?
-What we're trying to say is we're just not that into you.
-No!

-I'm still cool, right?
-If it's a boy, can we name him Maverick?

BETH HOYT: Hey guys-- boom, we're back.
Do you want more Co-op of the Damned?
Do you want it?
I know where you can find it.
You should go to our Co-op of the Damned playlist on
youtube.com/mydamnchannel.
That's where you should find it.
This is hard backwards.
I failed.
I failed at that.
Let's just get into your comments.
OK?
Let's do that.
All right, first up is one from hohum891.
"The James Vanderbeek interview was painful to
watch."
That, um--
that's referring to when I did the red carpet at the Young
Hollywood Awards and I was suffering from a concussion.
Neck brace and I was bleeding from the head.
I'll tell you what, hohum.
It was painful to do.
It was real painful to do.
Slight--
just a shock, a shock, slash, a dull throbbing up and down
my entire spine.
That was going on.
I don't really remember the interview, but it was painful
to watch when I came back from the studio.
You see the look of terror in Dawson's eyes, and
it is hard to watch.
Um, but I'm recovered.
I don't think he is.
And you know, the one thing that I can find solace in, is
that no one really knows how to spell his last name.
Is anyone 100% sure that they know how to
spell Van Der Beek?
And just how many words it is?
I think it's three.
That person thinks it's one.
You know?
We win.
Five.
Next comment is from BruceMOable.
"Do you think Beth Hoyt ever competed in beauty contests
when she was younger?" And then three thumbs up.
Is that encouragement?
Is that like, they may be wondering as well.
I'll tell you what?
I never did.
I did go to high school every day.
Does that count?
I put makeup on and like thought about my outfit.
Tried to be pretty in high school.
And middle school.
So that kind of counts.
But I never did actual real competitions.
Do you think I should?
I am too old?
Is there-- there's like a window.
They always look older than they are because they have all
the makeup.
Maybe I'm--
I'm going to go with the fact that I am not
too old, and I have--
I can tap dance a little bit.
They don't seem like too talented in the talent
competition, right?
It's like, I can kind of squeak by with this talent.
Maybe I could like, play tennis.
Will that work?
Would I be Miss Wisconsin?
Or Miss New York?
I have so many questions.
I need to check this information out.
And then maybe get into that competition.
And then maybe have to have a guest host that day.
While I'm off winning Miss America.
God, this is going to be exciting.
OK, we're going to be right back with some more comments.
But let's take a VB.
That's--
again, I've just-- that's video break.
This is The Jon Friedman Internet Program with "Snooze
Button."
FEMALE SPEAKER (OFFSCREEN): It's The Jon Friedman Internet
Program on your World Wide Web.
[DIAL UP INTERNET]
-Uh, 19 I think.
-Yeah, 19.
Here it is.
-Oh, there it is.
-Sorry I'm late.
Let me explain.
FEMALE SPEAKER (OFFSCREEN): It's The Jon Friedman Internet
Program on your World Wide Web.

-Hi, I'm Doctor Fred Wilson, and I'm here to tell you about
Med Fax, a new app that diagnosis all of your medical
symptoms in just a matter of seconds.
Sounds crazy, right?
Well, say you want to check your temperature.
All you have to do is open the app, load the page, and then
stick it up your butt.
-Oh, 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit.
Cool.
-Yes, that is cool.
But what if your throat hurts?
-Just put it in my mouth?
-Oh, not so fast.
Before you do that, you're going to need to go ahead and
stick it up your butt.
-Wait.
I put the phone in my mouth after I stick it in--
-That's right.
Before you know it, you'll find out if you have
bronchitis, strep, or just a simple sore throat.
-Huh, strep.
I guess that's kind of cool.
-What happens if you want to take a chest x-ray?
-Does Med Fax do that too?
-Sure does.
Just place the screen of the phone on your
chest for five seconds.
-Oh, nice.
-Now stick it up your butt.
-What?
-Podiatry.
-I think I can take a guess.
-That's right, just stick it up your butt.
-Gynecology.
-But I don't have a vagina.
-Doesn't matter, just stick it up your butt.
-Urology.
-Right.
-Stick it up your butt.
-Proctology.
-Oh.
I got this one.
Stick it up my butt.
-No.
Press the phone against your lower back.
Hold your breath for five seconds and then wait for the
beep.
-OK.
-Then stick it up your butt.
-Jesus Christ.
Are we done here?
-No, there's more.
Now you can get Med Fax on your tablet as well.
-No.
No.
Absolutely not.
Not going to happen.
-Med Fax, just stick it up your butt.

-Is that a wrap?

BETH HOYT: Ha, stick it in your butt.
That's what she said.
Wait, that would be-- that would be impossible.
Or very impressive.
I'm picturing it, are you?
OK, back to comments.
You guys, if you want some more--
first of all, if you want some of those Linked Out videos
like that one, go to our playlist, all of the playlists
we have on youtube.com/mydamnchannel.
I am training you, like I potty-trained my nephew.
Well, I did once.
I took him to the bathroom one time.
Does that count that I potty-trained a child?
All right, OK.
A couple of more comments are from Thethilucas.
"Thet-hi-lucas." That's probably it.
"heey, why the ocean is not moving."
Hey, it's because-- this is from I think the vacation
video we did last week when we were on vacation.
It's 4th of July.
I did the video in front of a green screen.
So you can't really go to the ocean and do it.
We could but there's sound issues.
We'd never--
you know, the sand in the camera.
Basically everything in here, it's all CGI.
Like this is not-- this isn't real.
This is CGI.
So, I mean, it looks like I'm doing that.
But that's--
that was $3,000 for that little stunt right there.
Sorry, guys.
[INAUDIBLE]
later.
Let's--
so that's-- that's how that works.
Nothing's real.
I am a little boy, actually.
So, wasn't supposed to tell you that till next week.
Anyway, next comment.
mrmagoo3112, or 3112.
You like that?
I am a little boy.
I don't know numbers yet.
It's 312.
"Why did you censor bikini top?'
Let's see, um, because I am a lady.
And because to CGI that--
well then we have to get more permission from--
I have a woman in mind.
I have someone in mind who I would use.
But I don't know if she'd agree to that.
So that's a whole other thing.
Maybe next time.
If I get her permission, she's the ones I'd want to use to
CGI in there.
So maybe next time.
That'd be exciting.
OK, another comment is from mothertheworld.
"I
love you." Thank you.
I love you, too.
"You are making me nauseas just watching though.
How in the world can you be so gorgeous and so pathetic at
the same time.
I hate female french toilets that attack-- awful.
Let's go on a rampage and jackhammer them out of all the
hotels."
OK, so mothertheeath, that's because I felt-- the reason I
got the concussion before the red carpet is that I fell off
my beday in my hotel room.
So we could jackhammer them all out.
Although, I'd rather just learn how to use it.
But that is a compliment, but also that's I'm pathetic.
So, thanks.
And you think it's hard just watching that
for a little bit.
I am her, you know?
So I am that person every day.
So that's harder for me.
But I'm glad that you're sticking with me on that and
that you still love me.
Because you started off with that and that
was a strong start.
So thank you mothertheearth.
And another comment is from Sobretts.
Hey, my nephew's name is Brett.
OK, let's stop talking about that, Beth. "It's raining
today like most days in the UK-- depressing!
But then I saw your video, smiley face."
That's so cool and sweet, and I love hearing that.
That is-- made my day.
Because it's kind of hot and I was kind of like in
a tired, like -ish.
And that comment made my day.
So thank you Sobretts.
And just so you guys know, whenever it's like raining and
you're feeling a little bit, ptt.
Put this--
put our show on.
And I guarantee you to have about, at least a 14% better
time during that--
that's a pretty good guarantee.
That's it.
That is good.
That's all the time we have, you guys.
But tomorrow's show is going to be really special.
We have, live in the studio, the creator of You Suck at
Photoshop, Troy Hitch.
We're going to talk about his series and working with Dane
Cook, and all sorts of fun things.
And we have a really special My Damn Channel series
premiere tomorrow.
It stars Sandeep Parikh of The Legend of Neil and The Guild.
We are so, so super proud of this and I'm real excited to
show you guys this video tomorrow.
You're going to love it.
Tune In for that.
Don't forget to subscribe.
And until then, until tomorrow, I'm just going to--
I'm just going to keep on living.
You guys do the same.
Seriously, don't die.
That would really bum me out.
OK?
Bye.
[MUSIC PLAYING]