Beer Grylls goes Dutch - Man vs. Wild parody

Uploaded by heineok on 23.02.2011

I'm Beer Grylls
I served with the britisch special forces, climbed the summit of the mount everest...
drank seven litres of beer in one hour and crossed the frozen oceans of the arctic.
And now, I'm in the Netherlands.
A country of extreme urban jungles and godforsaken open lands.
Each year hundreds of people need to be rescued from this harsh landscape.
This country has home to several dangerous species...
such as the rabbit...
and the guinea pig.
I'm gonna take my sixty eight manned cameracrew with me...
to show you the skills you need to survive
That was dangerous but fun!
I'm dropped in the woods nearby a great city called Utrecht.
Here live dozens of dangerous animals. So i wanna get outta here and fast.
The first thing i gotta do, is finding my bearings.
The easiest way to do that...
by smacking my head against a tree so hard that i black out.
The direction my head false will be pointing north.

When you know one direction, you'll know them all.
I've been walking around for hours...
and now it's time for some food.
Look over there!
I just found something.
It's a sheep, which contains a lot of protein.
It would be a real bummer to let this one go.
The main priorities to survive are water and food.
In the worst case scenario you can last for three weeks without food.
In survival situations however...
You won't last for two hours without the effects of dehydration.
So water is high on the list.
Over here, look!
It's a... Argentia Margenata.
And it is poisonous.
So I better not eat that.
Look, it's like an animal highway
This is a perfect spot for a trap.
Let's see what I have.
I've got some rope...
and a lot of branches.
Let's see what I can make.
It's already getting dark. The first thing I wonna do is, set up camp...
make a shelter for my self and go to bed.
How about that?
I'll show you that it is not difficult to make your own shelter in the wild.
there's a lot of stuff you can use.
F*** it, give me the tent!
[camera man] Come on Beer!
F*** you!
You can sleep in the f***ing motel, over there! F*** you!
Now that's easy! F*** you!
Good night! F*** off!
Look at that!
Look at that. That is awesome!
Never seen that before...
but it looks useable...
and it's my way outta here.
Eventually it was a thing called a bike. A vehicle often used in the Netherlands.
After some practice I managed to use this bicycle which helped me a lot.
After falling off for several times, I finally managed to use it at it's finest.
I don't know how these crazy Dutchmen came up with it, but now it's my way outta here!