Scarface Jerry (1.15.11 #48)


Uploaded by DividedAsOne on 18.01.2011

Transcript:
» [Door closes]
» BRUNO: I can’t believe how hot it is.
♪ ♫
It’s 11:17 AM, and it is 81°.
And we are in January.
» MIA: I’m sure a lot of people would be happy to trade, though.
» Oh, yeah. Wow, that’s actually kinda painful.
Who wants to guess what we’re doing at Target?
» [Wind blowing]
» BRUNO: Can you believe how windy it is?
You’re not gonna get blown away, are you? » Hope not.
» [Child whining] » BRUNO: Somebody needs to shut up.
» Most of the people in the store need to shut up.
» Anyway, we’re getting a vacuum.
If you guessed we were here to get kitty litter for Moochie, you are right.
We need a new vacuum ’cause it’s not picking up the Moochie moochies.
Boy, caring for some stray cats sure is expensive.
» Especially when they’re Moochies. » Especially when they’re Moochies.
» BRUNO: Jerry got hit with a branch.
Wow, look what he did.
That’s crazy.
Well, despite ripping your face open, you did very good trimming. » JERRY: Yeah!
» BRUNO: And the cretins are throwing out their Christmas tree.
Mia and Jerry are in the hospital, figuring out if that’s the right place or not.
» MIA (On phone:) Hey, um, we’re at the emergency section.
The guy has no idea about urgent care. So where are you?
» Oh, so that’s not right for Jerry? » MIA: This isn’t right.
The guy was completely helpl— you know, unhelpful.
» So what do we do?
Well, it’s open-ish.
» Well, it does say “Urgent care: 206.”
» BRUNO: Jerry, you want to check it out?
Well, they were nice, but they were concerned that…
They can do stitches, but Jerry would have a scar on his face,
so we’re going back to the ER ’cause his insurance might actually cover it,
and they might have access to a plastic surgeon, or something like that,
so he won’t have a scar.
We went to the place across the street, and they could have done the stitches
but worried that there could be a scar on Jerry’s chin.
I’m glad they told us that ’cause they gave Jerry the choice
of having a scar or not having a scar or ‹maybe› not having a scar.
‹Hopefully› not having a scar, although if he had a scar, we could call him Scarface.
I don’t think I mentioned yet, we’re getting a tenant today.
Our tenant is coming— moving in today, I think. She’s supposed to.
I’d probably obey the speed limit in a residential neighborhood
when I’m towing a boat, but that’s just me.
Health insurance is one of the things I got rid of to save money.
$500 a month and I have never been to the…
I’ve never once used it. Never been to a hospital or…
I’ve just never once had to use it.
So for five years… Well, it started out $129 a month,
and then it just kept going up. The last two years, it was close to $500 a month.
Close to $500 ‹a month› for something I’ve never used.
Of course, it just takes once to make it worth it,
unless you just take all the money you were paying every month
and put it aside somewhere and just use that if you were ever… I don’t know.
I’m gonna go home now and wait for the tenant
and continue cleaning up ’cause now the house is a mess.
That’s a good place for the Christmas tree.
Just you? » JERRY (On phone:) No, both of us.
» Mia wants a ride too? » JERRY: Yeah. » Oh, okay.
So what happened? » JERRY: I have stitches.
» Yeah, did you get a good doctor? » JERRY: What?
» Did you get the good doctor? » JERRY: Huh?
» Did you get the good doctor? » JERRY: I guess so, yeah.
» Okay, so it should heal nicely? » JERRY: Probably.
» BRUNO: How ’bout a signal? How ’bout a signal?
How ’bout an— how ’bout a signal? How ’bout a signal, asshole?
How ’bout a signal? How ’bout a signal?
No? Okay. Just checkin’.
Just bein’ silly.
Mrs. Mia. » They fixed Jerry.
» BRUNO: Oh, good. No more defective Jerry?
» JERRY: Um… » BRUNO: Uh-oh.
» JERRY: Well, I’ll be fine eventually.
» BRUNO: ‹Partially› defective Jerry.
» I’m at McDonald’s. I just came from the ER,
and I got stitches in my chin.
Five.
» BRUNO: Grumbles is looking at us.
Oh, these guys are goin’ at it.
Okay, my diet starts ‹now›!
I had to finish all the cookies-’n-cream ice cream to get that tub out of the freezer,
and then Jerry wanted to go to McDonald’s.
I said, “Jerry, can’t we go somewhere where there’s just, like, a nice salad or something?”
He said, “No, we have to go to McDonald’s, and you have to have a Big Mac.”
I said, “But Jerry!” He said, “Talk to the chin.”
I said, “Oh, okay, I’ll have a Big Mac.”