"Untitled Web Series..." Season 1, Part 1


Uploaded by sivartis on 10.09.2012

Transcript:
You are watching British Television.
Well done!

(Theme Song)
(mysterious music plays)
(BOOTH sound grows louder)

Ah, well, you're going to love this place, Piper.
I am looking forward to a little peace and quiet.
Saving that civilization of Dog People from certain extinction
Was harder than I would have thought!
Yes, well, nothing at all to do here, except explore and relax your worries away!
Well, where are we, Inspector?
Ah ah ah!
Right, right, I always forget.
WHEN are we?
Ah, yes, well, we are in the year Three Thousand Million, and this is Second New Old Earth Seven!
Second-- Wait, what was that?
Second New Old Earth Seven! Oh, it's marvelous!
See, when YOUR Earth became uninhabitable, Humans colonized other planets.
But the name kept being passed on, from Earth to Earth
and Seventh Earth was considered to be the absolute pinicle of Human civilization and enlightenment!
And so, round about the rise of Earth 42... ugh...
OLD Earth Seven was created as sort of a living museum!
Like Bletchley Park!
No, not at all!
But, the corporation that ran Old Earth Seven went bankrupt, and the rights were purchased by another,
Who did a major redesign, and launched NEW Old Earth Seven!
Oh, that was a party...
Until a slight miscalculation in the orbit caused it to crash right into its sun!
And, well, you know what they say about omelettes and eggs, so here we are,
SECOND New Old Earth Seven. The most peaceful planet in the universes,
Where absolutely nothing could ever, ever go wrong, ever.
Crikey, Inspector...
But... why does it look SO much like my Earth?
Ah, well, there's a very simple and completely satisfying explanation to that, and it all has to do with--
Circuit Chaps.
What? No, it has nothing whatever to do with--
No, Inspector, Circuit Chaps!!
INTEGRATE! INTEGRATE!!
Circuit Chaps! Why didn't you say so, Piper!
My sworn enemy, whom I've battled clear across the stars!
The most ruthless and dangerous beings in the galaxy, who'd just as soon spit on your mother as even look at y--
Piper: Inspector!
Hmm?
Shouldn't we run?
Oh! Oh, no, no. I have this.
(Optic Pocketknife activates)
Good thing you always carry your optic pocketknife!
Yes, well, be prepared, that's my motto.
Oy, a regular boy scout you are...
Inspector: Yes, well, I invented the Boy Scouts.
Wait, what was that?
Yes indeed, peaceful, peaceful, peaceful, peaceful planet.
And you know what they say, two bad things can never happen in a single adventure!
Who says that?
I did. Just then I said it. Shall I say it again?
(door creaks and slams shut behind them)
(alarms begin to blare)
Yes, I think you'd better had!
Announcer: Are the Circuit Chaps always so easily vanquished?
Why even have an alarm system on the Universes's most peaceful planet?
And did Piper say, "Dog People"??
Every single one of these questions might or might not be answered next week!
Same Space Channel!
Same... Space Time!
(Theme Song)