Detective Conan Abridged (parody) Episode 8

I used to love her.
but I had to kill her
I use to love her
But I had to kill her!
I had to put her
6 feet under
And I can still hear her complain!
Hey Conan, didja hear?
There's supposed to be a haunted suit of armor at the museum.
Conan: That's nice
Can we go? plea~~~~se!
[laughter]
You're so naive.
What would a suit of armor be doing in a museum like that?
Ran [thinking]: But I wanna go!
Well, I'm off to the bar.
And, I'm gonna go play soul silver.
HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!!!
If we don't go, your nuts will be next!
Wow it's so cute!
I wish I had one!
So... I heard you like mudkips.
I once played an entire game, with nothing but a mudkip!
Ummm... who are you?
I'm the director... Ochiai.
How facinating.
Don't forget to stop by the giftshop when you're done.
Kibota!
How many times must I tell you to wear gloves
when handling Chio-chan!
I-I can't count that high
I don't have enough fingers.
[brittish accent] I can't stand walking into this place.
Anime. What a disgusting sub-culture.
Come generic employee.
We must continue converting this into a NORMAL museum.
Ran: Is... what he said true?
You see... anime museums don't get a budget
since people prefer to illegaly download their anime.
Shinichi: You can download merchendice?
Ochiai: Feel free to compleatly ignore the rooms that have already been remodeled.
Aww, I wanted to see what was down there!
Unless I'm mistaken, this room's already been changed.
So no fanservice for me.
I hate museums I wanna go ho-o-ome!
NEED ALCOHOL!!!
Quit your whining!
Hey, the sign is gone. Let's go!
[evily] Unless you'd rather watch the 4kids version of One Piece.
[Laughs]
That's not fair!
Ran: They call THIS culture!?!
"Devine Punishment." La~me!
Awesome it's Manaka!
What the hell are you doing here!?
Dragged in here by my daughter, sir!
Megure [thinking]: That's nice.
So, any witnesses?
Not one.
Well, there's a camera over there!
Megure: Alright, we got picture.
There's the victem...
Now where's the murderer?
Conan: He was compleatly butchered!
'tis just a flesh-wound!
Hey wait minute...
It looks exactly like the painting in there!
And they say only videogames inspire murder.
Come to think of it... there was a sign that said.
"Go away. There is no crime being commited here."
But I'm sure it had nothing to do with this case.
Why didn't you say anything sooner!?
Ran: It said there is no crime being commited!
THAT'S A SURE SIGN OF INNOCENCE!
Ran, I am dissapoint.
Conan: Hey, what's Manaka doing?
Megure: He just grabbed the tag... BUT WHY!?!
Conan: He's writing something.
Kogoro: H-hey, how'd the camera zoom in and change angles like that?
Megure: Shut up. We-we gotta check the body again.
Here ya go, lassie!
Ki-Kibota!?
IT WASN'T ME, I SWEAR!!!
Then what's your alibi?
I-I went to see "How to Tame Your Dragon"
Megure: So it's safe to say there'd be no witnesses.
Kibota: But, what about the lobby?
So it's safe to say there'd be no witnesses.
Hey inspector, I found a pen!
Great!
It must belong to Manaka.
That pen, is exclusive to our musium.
Only those who work here have one.
Yep, it's a match.
Shinichi: This doesn't add up. Kibota's a bumbling idiot!
Not only that, but if it was him, this case would be WAY to simple.
All the cases in this show are supposed to be overly complex
Making me look good.
Eww, that's gross!
Reminds me of your girlfriend!
'scuse me!
Get outta here kid!
We're busy doing important... guard-like things.
Inspector Megure wanted me to tell you guys that you're fired.
Awesome! Now I can apply for welfare!
Race you to the post office!
Shinichi: Suckers!
Conan: Hmm, let's see.
Suprised reaction...
...throws the pen away.
Hey wait a minute. When I found the pen
it was retracted!
WAIT, I'VE GOT IT!
Hey! Yoink!
Shinichi: Just as I thought!
Inspector, look what we found in Kibota's locker!
I swear, I'm being set up, IT WASN'T ME!!
Right. And Stephen Segall is a good actor.
Shinichi: Make all the obscure refrences you want.
But there is only one truth.
Well Kibota... I hope you like orange.
No, please no. Let go of me, I didn't do it NOOO!
I GOTTA PEE!
Pottypottypottypottypotty
Mister, where's the bathroom, hurry tell me!
It's just outside this room, on the left.
I can't remember any of that.
Draw a map!
As I said, it's just outside this room and
OVERDRAMATIC REACTION!!!
Conan: Why aren't you writing?
Oh I get it. You knew the pen wouldn't work even before writing.
You must have ESP or something!
So that means...
...Koizumi's the killer?
Shinichi: Wrong series you idiot!
I-it looks like somebody tride to scratch something out with a pen that doesn't work.
[chuckle] I get it now.
See.. the piece of paper already had "Kibota" written on it.
But Manaka knew it wasn't him, so he tried to change it.
Unfortunately for him, THE PEN DIDN'T WORK!
Looks like the pen we found still works.
But wasn't it retracted when I found it?
Now who would take the time to retract the pen
just as they're about to be murdered?
I've had worse!
Well couldn't Manaka have had a case of OCD?
Ochiai: Okay, I confess.
I killed him.
He wanted to turn my anime musium into something a little more...
conservitive.
That's sad...
It should have been turned into a casino or something.
And I chose to frame Kibota because...
...well he's an idiot and nobody will miss him.
But alas, my plans were spoiled by a small knight of justice.
What do you mean by "small?"
I guess you don't have to use the bathroom anymore, do you?
I uh, uh.
[laughter]
So the Anime museum's gonna stay open?
Mitsuhiko: That's a shame.
I was looking forward to some real culture.
Oh hey! You remember that story about the bear
wondering around the school?
Yeah I heard about that
I was the one who started the ru-
Genta: This sounds like a job for the detective boys!
C'mon Conan. Before you lose the game!
[Sigh] I don't like the game.
Captions by martialmichael126
Next Conan's Useless Hint
Conan: NINJAS!
I hate Naruto.