NO MORE NBA SEASON & WHY I DON'T CARE


Uploaded by sxephil on 15.11.2011

Transcript:

Hello lovelies, welcome to the Tuesday show
if you're not familiar, my name is Philip DeFranco
and this show really isn't a show
it's just me talking about some of the stuff that mattered in the news to me
and the first thing we're going to talk about today
is something you guys have been asking me to talk about for about a week
and that is the NBA lockout that is now
turned into a possible cancellation
of the professional basketball season
and I know what you're thinking "How can America survive
without professional basketball?"
and also why am I screaming?
good questions, but the only reason I bring up this story
is because you asked me to and I mock you for it
now I might not care about basketball
because I'm from New York and we never really had a good team
because we're always destroyed by like Michael Jordan and Miller
that guy should've just been called the Indiana Monsoon
because he just rained threes
non-basketball loving people, don't worry I'm getting to you in a minute
because ultimately it doesn't come down to basketball
it comes down to greed
it is a negotiating battle between millionares and billionares
so excue me for not giving a fuck
one of the key negotiating points
is the split of basketball type revenue
between players and owners
the old deal, players got 57%
in the new deal they get 50%
and that's the thing, I could give a shit at this point
like people are literally arguing over
money that mean like they get another pool
or another Ferrari, honestly
they can all go fuck themselves, I will take
pleasure in them squirming as they see
another decimal move over in their bank account
and they think to themselves "Oh shit, I used to have
$12,000,000 and now I only have $9,000,000. Oh noes"

so main point, let them squirm and fuck this NBA season
if you want to be an overpaid athlete, learn how to swing a baseball bat
and we move on to our douchebag of the day
an Illinois man by the name of Michael Skopec
Michael returned home to evening we're talking about
very drunk and very angry about an iPhone that would not work
so Michael did what any smart would do
and called 911
repeatedly, Michael apparently angry that the first
911 operator was unable to help him
probably because she was in India somewhere
called back several more times and the best part
the audio of those calls have been released
to the public, so enjoy
911: Do you have an emergency sir?
Michael: Yes I do, my emergency is my fucking phone don't work
911: What's your address sir and we can someone
come over and help you.
Michael: That's a really stupid response, he can't help me
911: How do you know?
Michael: Becaue they'll shoot me with a gun
911: What am I supposed to do if I get a call on 911
Michael: Well you know
911: and you're not
Michael: you know what you're wasting my time to begin with
911: you're the one that called me sir
oh Michael you douchebag
the police did finally end up sending an officer over there
and they arrested Michael for obstructing/resisting an officer
/being one of the stupidiest people in Illinois
that should be crime, although on the sad side
there is no report if his iPhone has been fixed yet
so main point, alcohol
multiplies douchebaginess and now you know

What is the stupidest thing you or someone you know done while intoxicated?
leave your comments down below
and of course we're throwing something at your face today and it is
a copy of Assassin's Creed Revelations
if you want that thing to possibly pelt you in the face, of course
all you got to do is leave a comment on this video
and after that, of course, if you want to like favorite of share this video
in anyway, I love your face Nation
thank you very much, but of course that is everything
that mattered to me this Tuesday
as always, my name is Philip DeFranco
and you've just been Phill'd in
and I will see you tomorrow