Versailles - HOLY MOTHER OF GOD! with William H. Macy - Versailles


Uploaded by MyDamnChannel on 22.05.2011

Transcript:

INTERVIEWER (OFFSCREEN): Mr. Macy, is it painful for you to
recollect that incident with Evelyn Anders?
-No, man, I want to talk about it.
Because I've been reading all this stuff in the papers, and
it's crap, most of it.
One, she was invited to teach that class at the university
where I met Evelyn.
She was invited.
She didn't wander off the street.
That's crazy.
Two, she invited a lot of people to her hotel
room, not just me.
I don't know why the rest didn't go.
Three, I willingly was drinking.
I know I was 16, but I was willingly drinking.
Maybe it would've been better for my first sexual experience
if I'd been conscious, but that's not her fault.
And then finally, that whole thing with the policemen and
the firemen, the jaws of life, totally excessive force.
We--
she--
I think would have ultimately let them in.
I think.
I dream about it a lot.
I have dreams.
But I don't blame her in the dreams.

It's my mother.

My mother.

[HUMMING QUIETLY]
[KNOCKING]
HOYT (OFFSCREEN): You ready, honey?
-All set.

-[SIGHS]

Did I ever tell you that a while ago, I married the most
beautiful girl in the world?

-Really?
-Mmhm.
-And who would that be?
-You.

[RETCHING]
[TOILET FLUSHES]

-Uhhh.
Huuuuh, huuuunh.

Eerrrnh.
-Our first guest is a familiar face to people here in
Versailles.
He's the pharmacist out at the Rexall on M-74, so many of you
may know him from getting your medications.
I get my medications there.
What you may not know is that he's a
champion badminton player.
So please join me in welcoming local badminton
legend Robert Sprague.

Bob.
Now you've been playing badminton
all your life, right?
And you've won championships?
-I was champion of the Rogers Lake Badminton
Tournament last fall.
-I imagine this is a fairly strenuous sport, right?
And there's--
it's a mental game, too.
There's a lot of strategy.
-Oh, yes.
It's important to stay cool under pressure.
-Perhaps you could tell us a little bit about the history
of the sport of badminton.
-Yes.
The game of badminton as we know it originated in India
where it was known as pune.
-Pune?
-Yes, pune.
-And was a pretty much just played the
same as modern badminton?
-Uhh, I don't know.
-Now when you play your championship games, is there a
strategy you use that gives you a competitive advantage?
-Well, I basically just try to put my cock where
they can't hit it.
-You were going to demonstrate some serving techniques.
-Yes, uh, deceptively simple.
Round the head four.

-For those of you thinking of picking up the wonderful sport
of badminton, we have a wide away of--
a wide array of badminton supplies at Hoover Hyde and
Sons in downtow--
[BREAKING GLASS]
Versailles, where my husband Hoyt and his friendly staff
can help you.
-Oh, oh.
-Holy mother of God, he's peeing himself.

Didn't you hear me calling you?

-I was reading.
-Just reading?
-Yeah.

-Have you been drinking?

-No.
-Let me smell.
Let Summer smell.
-Mmm.
-Let Summer smell, sweetite.
-No.
-Let Summer smell.
-Nmmh!
-Let Summer smell.
You are not gonna screw this up for me, Colin!
-Mmm, mmm!
-Oh!
You get--
-Agghh, helllhh--
-Unnnggh, bitch!
-I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.