CHRYED - C & S story 32 (2/2) - july 2 2009 - ENG SUB

-Ah, can I get you a coffee?
-I'm not staying, um...
Do you know if Zainab's in a good mood? -I have absolutely no id...
Oh that is a flaming cheek! -Who is he?
-Naz, the chef from the Argy Bargy. He thinks he's a Bangladeshi Gordon Ramsey! Look at him he's checking our prices! Oi! Naz!
-Don't make a fuss, not on your special day. Let me deal with this.
-Christian!
Make sure that skinny bloke gets the big one.
-Fattening him up for Christmas, are you? -No. No appetite, no mates, he's our winner alright. Chop chop!
-Right, ladies and gentlemen, it's the moment you've all been waiting for, it's the search for the 'golden meal' ticket!
-Wahey! -The winner will get a slap-up meal for themselves and their mates
Now, you should all be holding a complimentary cupcake, beautifully crafted by the wonderful Mrs Masood.
-I ain't got a cake! -Christian...
-Here you go -Thank you. -Now, the technique here is to nibble.
Okay? Because we don't want anybody choking on their 'golden meal' ticket!
So, without further ado...1, 2, 3...nibble!
-Here! I've got it! I've got a golden ticket!
-Everybody we have a winner!
Come back sometime next week and I'll sort you out with a burger, yeah?
-No, the terms of the competition are a free meal for the winner and their friends. Here.
Now in fact, this flier is so naff, it doesn't even stipulate how many.
-Yeah, um, I think you'll find if you read the small print... -What small print?
-It's...on the flier...um
Bloody Tamwar! -"Win a free meal for you and your friends." Well I think everyone here is my friend!
-Oh, that smells good, doesn't it?
-Yeah, it really does. -Hiya!
-Where's Amira? -I don't know, but wait until you taste the food. The dall is perfect.
-You don't like my dall? -I don't mind it. It's just that, well, you know...
-Please! Don't embarrass me by comparing me to your mother, Tam.
I hope one day that my food, and indeed everything I do, will bear comparison.
I look forward to learning at your side. Please, sit! Eat!
-I hope you're happy now. This little lot has cost me a fortune. And why Mitchell, right? Anyone but Mitchell.
-Exactly! Anyway you should be thanking me. Something which you've forgotten to do all day.
Because this lot will be back, and they'll pay next time.
-Is that a compliment? -As close as you're going to get!
-Mmm, that was really good. Really good. Truly excellent.
-Delicious. -Please, you don't have to say these things to make me feel better.
-What can I say, extraordinary!
-Ahem! Yes, Amira, you have done a...a very good job here. I should stay out of the kitchen more often!
-What on Earth are you doing? -Forensic analysis of the meal, alright?! Syed said that she couldn't cook
and all of a sudden she metamorphoses into Madhur Jaffrey. I'm telling you, she's hiding something!
-She's not hiding anything, you lunatic!
-Ah ha ha, there we go. I've found it, chakra-phool, -Ah?
-Star anise. Now how do you explain that when I know for a fact that we'd run out? -Oh!
-You're right. Which is why I nipped to the shop. -Amira, you...just
-No, it's fine. I never really was much of a cook. Never had to be.
But I really tried tonight and, if I was okay, I guess I just got lucky.
-You were the one who said that she couldn't so much as cook as fish finger!
And wouldn't you be suspicious as well when all of a sudden, she's making gourmet fare?
I don't believe that one for...
Syed?
-Look, she wants to impress you, Ma. Don't you get it? She wants your approval. I don't know why she bothers!
-Sixty quid you said? Good.
That's it, check that.