The Guild - S5 Ep7: Downturn

CODEX: Big decisions.
Big life decisions.
The past few years-- well, you've heard me whine.
You know they haven't been great.
Finding the Game and the guild was a lifesaver for me.
It was a safe place where I didn't feel like collapsing
all the time.
But lately, I just, I've been drifting.
And if I quit the Game, will the guildies
be my friends anymore?
Was Floyd right?
Were they even real to begin with?
Without Codex, who am I?
That's what I have to find out.
I hate being an adult.
I'm hungry.
I might order room service.
Why is room service so expensive?
[THEME SONG PLAYING]

TINK: Oh.
Whatever.
Too many people were mistaking me for the Asian
girl from any show.
Going to change.
I'll be out of here quick.
What next?

I made all these myself.
CODEX: Are you kidding?
TINK: Pretty good for a premed major, right?
CODEX: Yeah.
TINK: I'm not premed anymore.
I've been getting a costume design degree for the last
five semesters.
CODEX: Wow.
TINK: Yeah.
But, catch.
My parents have been paying for a premed
degree for two years.
They have no idea I switched majors.
CODEX: Why don't you tell them?
TINK: I'm adopted.
I can't be the screw up.
That's like a bad indie film.
CODEX: Oh, you're adopted.
That's why you have white sisters.
Not that there were a lot of other options.
TINK: They were so excited that I was
going to be a doctor.
Don't want to disappoint.
So every time I get a text message asking, does this mole
look cancerous, dear?
I have to press the Ignore button.
That's why I was avoiding Lara and Tara last night.
Check out my Gaga.
CODEX: Glamorous.
Lara and Tara?
Twins that rhyme?
Ew.
TINK: Yeah.
Ridiculous.
CODEX: Oh, nice Chun-Li.
You should tell them.
I mean, hard decisions are hard to decide, but they make
you feel better after.
Kind of.
TINK: Are you kidding?
I've been basically stealing from them.
No thanks.
Lying and avoidance is better.
I didn't mean to tell you to get a life earlier.
CODEX: No, no, you're right.
I need to live life less sadly.
I just don't know what that is.

BLADEZZ: Uh, hey, Vork.
Buddy.
You're filming the wrong thing.
Magic's happening here.

Dude, your gaze on for Miss Milf over there
is hard as a coconut.
VORK: Madeleine Twain was and is a goddess
of the small screen.
She played the intrepid assistant Charity Maddox to
Chuck Boswell's Professor in the seminal sci-fi adventure
series "Time Rings," 1992 to 1997.
BLADEZZ: So before even my mom's time.
VORK: I was the head of her mail order fan club, which
consumed my early 20's.
Then she betrayed us all and quit.
Her departure was so abrupt, they couldn't compensate,
canon wise.
Her character, Charity, was simply abandoned in a Roman
era episode, never to be referred to again.
"Time Rings" was canceled half a season after.
Curse you, Madeleine Twain.
BLADEZZ: Um, so, you hate her.
Why are you trembling?
VORK: She is still so beautiful.
BLADEZZ: OK.
VORK: Whoa, freeze.
Freeze, boy!
NEIL GAIMAN: Look, "Sandman" finished 14 years ago.
These kids have no idea who I am.
The convention's given me the biggest room in the place.
This is going to be embarrassing.
Your Seat Savers network is my only hope.
ZABOO: Sure, sure, sure.
You know, your stuff's OK if you like universally acclaimed
awesome graphic novels and such.
But uh, I don't know.
You know, a few million Twitter followers is not going
to get Mega Gamaramacon excited about a writer.
NEIL GAIMAN: Look, "Sandman Zero" is coming out next year.
I'll get you a signed set.
Personally signed to you.
ZABOO: To exploit the network for a panel?
Got to run.
So much to do.
So much to see.
So many things going on, you know.
NEIL GAIMAN: I'll put you in the comic.

ZABOO: Cover.
And give me muscles.
NEIL GAIMAN: It's not that kind of a comic.
ZABOO: Make it that kind of comic.
OK, maybe like, special thanks or something.
NEIL GAIMAN: Yeah, we can do that.
ZABOO: 2:00 PM tomorrow, room 5A?
NEIL GAIMAN: 2:00 PM tomorrow, room 5A.
ZABOO: I'll alert the network.
Just this once.
NEIL GAIMAN: Look, I'm, I'm really grateful.
Thank you so much.
ZABOO: It's a new convention, comic man.
And the Seat Savers rule it.
Spread the word.
Quiet-like.
NEIL GAIMAN: Don't, don't do that.
ZABOO: Sorry, Neil Gaiman.
BLADEZZ: Hey, sexy.
My handler would love to meet you.
We're the guys in the popular corner.
VORK: Bladezz, stupid pirate.
MADELEINE: Oh, you boys are so busy.
I mean, the enthusiasm of the fans is admirable.
One can't help but miss being that popular.
BLADEZZ: Oh, well, it's not that hard.
And you know what?
I think Vork could hook you up in return for a little face
time, if you know what I mean, chicky.
[MAKING DONKEY SOUNDS]
RICHARD HATCH: Hey, Madeleine.
Good to see you again.
MADELEINE: Hi.
RICHARD HATCH: Hey, guys.
Tell me how this, uh, Twitter thing works.
And how is it good for me?
VORK: Ugh.
BLADEZZ: Can I get a photo with you for MyFace?
My gay aunt will flip.
RICHARD HATCH: MyFace?
Know what that is.
Met a woman on there once, definitely not your aunt.
Could be.
Uh, why don't you guys come hang with us tonight?
BLADEZZ: Um, did you mean us?
Like, other faces I recognize and hang out?
Like talking, and coolness?
MADELEINE: Uh-huh.
I would love to learn about this new technology frontier,
and you guys are the experts.
BLADEZZ: Vork won't go.
He's not impressed by the puppet people.
No offense, guys.
VORK: Madeleine there?
Be together?
Same room?
Lady--
[GROANING].

BLADEZZ: Uh, might be a yes?
RICHARD HATCH: Sounds great.
MADELEINE: Yeah.
RICHARD HATCH: Suite 304 at the Westin across the
street, 7:00 PM.
BLADEZZ: OK.
Well, um, let's go back to our corner, get you wiped off, and
we'll see you guys tonight.

CLARA: Diddit, diddit, diddit.
Sounds like a woodpecker.
I said wood.
And pecker.
-You have talent there.

-And she cannot mix a proper laudanum, either.
Disastrous.
ALINA: And her chloroform, ineffective.
-No response on the Ouija board, and because of the
pregnancy, opium and absinthe sipping are out.
-'Tis a right shame, but you are absolutely unqualified in
any of the poseur fields.
Won't do for a costume contest.
Simply will not do.
We must create a respectable mise en scene.
Understand?
CLARA: Um, how difficult can it be?
Get a costume, act all snooty, done and done.
ALINA: Are you trying to undermine our faith?
Steampunk is a unique look and lifestyle.
And it--
[GASP].
-Alina.
Your staise.
Your staise.
-Steampunk is steampunk, describable
only by the word itself.
ALINA: [GASPING].

Thank you, darling.
I owe you a tonic at dinner.
I'm sorry, dear.
Though your efforts are admirable, if you don't get
it, you simply can't be a part of it.

[OLD TIMEY MUSIC PLAYING]
CODEX: Like I was saying, I've been disillusioned about the
Game and the guild, but your confiding in me upstairs, it
really meant a lot as a friend.
So I wanted to do something for you, not about me.
TINK: Ew, walking greeting card much?
CODEX: Yeah.
-April Lou!

LARA AND TARA: We're so excited to see you!
-Look at you, as pretty as ever.
CODEX: April Lou?
TINK: I take it back.
You're not OK.
You are dead.
[LAUGHTER]
-It's alive!
[THEME SONG PLAYING]