Creature Comforts Christmas .mov

I like seeing friends
and just, sort of, taking it easy
and sort of, being comfortable but not extravagant.
I just like sitting down, eating, drinking and being merry really
There is that as well.




Christmas is celebrating
something to do with God, yeah? But then again,
do you believe in God? You know.
It all goes around that sort of thing, like. So I think Christmas is a time
where people just goes out and just goes mad and buying people's gifts and stuff like that.
Christmas is
Jesus's birthday, I think, but I think
it's not the exact date. I think something else happened
on that day but I'm not exactly sure.
Christmas... I go everywhere at Christmastime
with my mistletoe attached to my glasses, and then I can kiss all the chaps
that I come in contact with. I managed to get the caretaker,
Well, I didn't manage to catch him because I had my mistletoe on
and he was in the carpark, and I went up to him, and I showed him my mistletoe
and he ran, and he's a really fast runner, and I couldn't catch him!
It's just the excitement.
The excitement of actually, er, you know, I still get a bit of a thrill
out of it, yeah, after all these years. Brings me back to my childhood.
As I get older I like hearing Christmas carols, and that's quite nice sometimes.
If it's cold at Christmas, and there's snow on the ground, it's lovely, that side of it.
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way. So much fun it is to ride
Jingle all the way. So much fun it is to ride
On a one horse open sleigh. So!
Dashing through the snow, on a one horse open sleigh,
I love dressing up, yeah, I love dressing up at Christmas, yeah.
The flashing earrings, and all the tacky stuff, you know!
I just like the atmosphere
and seeing the kids' faces, and yeah, just always liked it.
So, jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin flew away
So, jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin flew away
La la la da da da da da da da da ...
I used to love it when I was a kid, but I've been a bit busy these past couple of years
so I've not really noticed it. It's just flown by and then
it's been completely gone. And the telly's so absolutely appalling.
Just don't really see it go by. I feel really awful for saying that because I'm not miserable.
Christmas Eve we get off early, so we run around
all these mad places.
Sometimes you get a bit jealous, with everyone else still snugly wrapped up in their beds.
You're out there in the freezing cold, but it's got its compensations.
Being appreciated, that's actually, that's the nicest part.
When you are appreciated. I think it should go back to the way it was, like,
the pagan days, Christmas.
Celebrating nature, just sit down with a big plate of organic food. That'll do.
Winter's based on winter solstice.
She makes a marvellous cook,
she makes a big turkey or chicken
There's a variety of pork as well,
little sausages wrapped in bacon, ⎮ ittle prawn cocktails to start off with.
I don't really enjoy a proper Christmas meal.
I did used to like a nice bit of turkey and stuffing, and spuds and all the vegetables
but it's just salad and spuds for me now, I'm afraid.
Trifle. It's always good.
I'm always starving, so that's really what Christmas, l suppose, means to us.
There's always an argument, isn't there?
And sometimes, even, the turkey ends up on the wall.
I think even if you hate turkey, you've got to have it at Christmas.
I think it's the law. It's delicious, turkey.
Turkey butties, a bit of stuffing on it - you can't beat it.
You cannot beat it. A bit of cranberry sauce on mine.
You can't beat that.
I do feel that I'm being pulled in all directions.
They're all going to get a piece of me.
So we had the normal sort of, you know, lunch
and then sort of all sat around playing a few games.
We had this great room, we've actually moved since.
It was a converted barn, ⎮ and it was just one massive
old stone barn with a snooker table in it.
It turned out to be a bit of a party, which, you know
less of the sort of family stuff, but more the sort of, you know, let's have a great old time.
When I'm closing my eyes, I go
one reindeer, two reindeer, three reindeer
I count them.
And that's what makes me go to sleep.
It's best if you're a kid because then you ask for something
like the new underwater man with
special, er, tanks on his back and the flippers
and instead of that, you get this big chemistry set,
and you're six years old, and you've got fifty test tubes
full of chemicals to play with.
And you look at it and you go, "Oh. Thanks."
As far as exchanging presents goes, well, I've given up that idea.
I think people get more stupid with their money at Christmas.
The amount of stuff that people buy, I think people buy
things just for the sake of buying them. They don't actually think
"Oh, this is useful." You know what I mean? You can get, like, a stocking
like a selection box, but a selection box
stocking for pets. That's different than sending your cat a card, isn't it?
Because what can a cat do with a Christmas card?
Because what can a cat do with a Christmas card?
Imagine a farmer sending a card to his herd.
For the cow at Christmas!
Not to be confused with the wife or anything.
I'm obviously not crazy enough with my presents, but one thing that I always, always give
and it's the best present, because I was given it myself,
is a fondue set. The best present in the world. Great.
It's nice giving things.
I came across an old saying, I love old sayings, they last
because they're true. The grasping hand is never full.
To be full, the hand has to give.
The only thing I ever got given to me, because I didn't want to buy it, was a pair of Y-fronts.
I think that was the only thing that was ever given to me, but it wasn't a Christmas present.
I certainly wouldn't give it to someone for a Christmas present.
If you think it's tough for us, imagine what it's like for Santa.
How many billions of people does he have to deliver to?
And he does it in about four hours, so he's pretty, he's a pretty cool guy.
You know, especially for the size of him, he's very, with his big fat belly
I don't know how he does it. Brilliant.

I had one of the most startling,
not scary, experiences of my life. I actually bumped into, you imagine
a deer, a reindeer, a big animal, and I scared it,
it scared me, I scared it, we scared each other. Boom!
Completely dark apart from just light from the stars.
Completely dark apart from just light from the stars.

People probably say to you "It must be tough having to work all Christmas"
That is the sort of peak time.
It'll use all your different skills, your comedy.
Your timing.
Happy Birthday, Santa!
Happy Birthday, Jesus!
Happy Christmas everybody!