Ira?
When are you coming? The show has begun.
Yes, hello. Hello?
Yes, I can't hear anything.
Wait. Give me one second.
Yes, tell me.
No, it's fine
It's just that today l got out from work early, so...
...thought I'll catch a movie with Shan, but he said...
...he's caught up with some work.
And Siddhartha Roy has a solo performance at The Basement today...
...so I came down alone.
No but I did call you!
Nothing lovey-dovey.
The marriage is next week Boss! All that jazz is over.
Anyway heís behaving like a typical husband.
He speaks mostly in monosyllables.
And...
...hello?
Hello?
Meghna stop!
Meghan please stop!
It's just an accident.
Right! And you're not insured!
Meghan please! It's nothing. These things happen!
And now whatever will happen can happen too.
Meghan!
Now listen.
Hello boss!
Why are you overreacting?
You know it very well...
...the body isnít everything to me Meghan!
I know.
But a certain part of the body is.
That's it.
You want to play hard?
Then listen.
It's not working out.
I'm sick & tired of being comfortably numb.
I...
...I meant to tell you.
I would've...
...informed you anyway.
Being friends for the last 14 Years was good enough.
I can't handle this new found formality.
Yes.
Are you home?
Come.
Hello. - - Hi.
I need a favour. - - Same here.
Reduce your drinking.
Can I talk to you in private please?
Actually...
...I can't sleep.
I have an important presentation tomorrow.
Iíve to wake up early.
And I can't afford to... - -No!
Not any more sleeping pills. It's becoming a bad habit.
Please dad, for last time. I...
...promise.
Your mother will grumble again if... -
- My mother won't know dad because my mother is dead.
You must be talking about Niharika.
Must we do this now?
Just give me the prescription &...
...I'll leave.
Give me something strong. The previous one was very mild.
Brother.
Hello brother excuse me?
Hello!
Could you wake up please?
Can I get a pack of condoms?
Hundred and fifteen rupees.
Isn't there anything smaller than this?
What nonsense in the middle of the night.
Take this, 20 rupees. - - Give me this medicine.
250 rupees.
Hey, take the change!
What the hell!
What's wrong with Bubla?
Nothing. Same problem. Insomnia.
Chitto...
...I think you should talk to her.
I tried but it's of no use.
What do you mean by you tried?
Youíre her father.
Not her landlord.
I know.
It wouldíve been simpler if l was.
After a point children must realize that their parents are human beings!
They may have needs. They can feel lonely.
I think the problem is with me.
Not her.
Maybe l failed to fill in the blank.
You've done enough.
May be more than enough.
Forget it.
Let her live the way she wants to.
She'll realize herself one day.
Just a second.
Who is it?
CIA.
What?
CIA Poddopukur branch. Open or weíll have to break in.
We've information that a dangerous terrorist is hiding in your apartment.
We have to search. - - But...
...where's the guard?
No idea. I saw an old man snoring inside a mosquito net downstairs.
But I live here alone. Just get out!
No one else lives here.
But you could be a beautiful spy who's trying to fool me.
So make way, let us do our job.
One second!
What "we"? Youíre alone.
I'm proud to be a CIA agent & pride makes one plural. Move!
Stop.
Where's your...
...search warrant? - I was waiting for that. See...
...as per the rules of POTA, MOTA, & LOTA...
...terrorist cases require no search warrants.
Google it if you want. I'll wait here.
POTA? MO...
Hey! One second!
Keep that knife away. - That is not done!
Raj Kumar quipped in the film Waqt, "That's no child's play."
Is that the bedroom? - You can't just check my... -
Yes!
Don't go that side. - -Don't worry.
I won't scatter things like in Hindi films, it makes the search difficult.
But... but...
...but how dare you enter my bedroom?
What the hell? - -What's this?
Don't touch that! Don't!
Just don't touch that!
Give that to me! Give that bottle back!
Give that bottle back!
You better not!
Ananda Kar.
Don't give me all this bull crap!
That's not. That's my name. Anandakar. Hello.
I don't give a shit!
Why did you do this? - -Which bit?
Oh just shut up!
Who gave you the right?
Lts my life. I decide lf l live or die!
Now you'll give me free advice, right?
"Think of your parents, Your neighbours...
...think of your washer!" I won't!
Because no one's ever thought of me,
I just don't want to live, I want to die.
You know what, even I donít want you to live.
Excuse me?
I mean, your life is completely your own property.
You live or you die, your decision.
Who am I to poke my nose into it?
But you just flushed away the pills...
- Let me explain.
That's what I'm trying to explain. Don't panic.
Listen.
I...
...run an institution called 'Hemlock Society'.
We believe...
...if a person wants to die...
...it must be well organized.
See, suicide isnít an easy job, it's extremely difficult.
It's easier said than done.
So it needs technical education...
...& a strong will.
Without which in most cases...
...suicide becomes attempted suicide.
And then comes, face loss...
...embarrassment, trauma, police case, even imprisonment!
Are you kidding me?
I have neither the time nor sense of humour.
One minute.
Madam.
This is our card.
We provide education to commit a successful suicide, free of cost.
Here.
Listen if this is your idea of a joke then it's pathetic &... -
- Hardly that.
Let me give you an example.
You've bought a bottle full of valium pills.
Do you know that they hardly have a chance of killing you?
See l too am a fan of Hindi films.
But that method of gulping down sugar-free pills...
...is an incorrect method of suicide.
You'll be surprised to know...
...these companies make the sleeping pills in such a way that...
...dying by popping them is very difficult.
But my dad's prescription... -
- If your dad's a doctor then he surely knows that...
...you can't die by these. Otherwise he wouldnít prescribe them.
But if you had Epilepsy Or Schizophrenia...
...& if you took 5 to 10 Milligrams of Gardenal or Largactil...
...you still had a chance. Do you like lady's fingers?
Lady's finger?
Or snake Gourd?
What are you saying?
These could at most damage your central nervous system &...
...put you in a wheelchair for life like a lady's finger.
Or a liver damage would mean...
...a lifetime of boiled food, what's wrong?
I'm a complete loser. I can't even commit suicide!
I just donít want to live!
Oh no! Why are you getting demoralized?
Like l said, you need knowledge, a strong will power & wisdom.
Yes! Which is why l'm saying...
...you must join our crash course from tomorrow.
For now just take the setwo...
...see me off & crash for the night.
No, take those...
...you'll call up my family.
I just don't want to live, Is that clear?
Crystal.
I'm saying the truth. Trust me.
I really donít want you to live without your consent.
So I'll neither inform your family nor police.
But if you stay up. I'll have to sit monitoring you all night.
Or else you might try things again & goof up badly.
So sleep tonight. Let's talk in the morning?
Makes sense.
Take it madam. I'll leave once youíre sleepy.
My girlfriend is waiting, She'll fall asleep.
Please take it fast.
Could you download the PF form?
No. The net was down.
I'll try again from my office today.
Don't you have to leave? - - Oh yes.
I was thinking of visiting... -
I called her. The phone was switched off.
Maybe sheís in a meeting or sleeping.
Couldn't you go check once? - I could.
Lfit's still off l'll go in the noon.
First to her office then to her apartment.
If l still don't find her I'll go to her friends...
...& then to the police.
After thatíll wander around in tattered clothes like a lunatic.
People can die without treatment for that.
After all she's a pampered kid from an affluent family.
Chitto, she is in a lot of pain.
I think youíre being extremely insensitive.
You men.
Mother India!
What?
Can I come in? ...No.
Are you alright?
Never felt better.
And even if l'm not, you donít need to bother.
Actually Chitto... - Thanks for all the concern.
Chitto called you twice in the morning.
The phone was... - - I know.
It was switched off.
I was sleeping.
I'm going off to sleep again.
Goodnight.
What happened? Where are you?
I tried you so many times. Then your phone was switched off.
Did you go somewhere else from The Basement?
No...
...I was home. The battery was over.
Aren't you coming to the office today?
Iíve bunked.
I'm a little upset.
Tell Hitler it's a viral. It's the flavour of the season.
Listen, there is a bit of bad news.
I thought I'd tell you last night but you sounded tired & happy so...
...you're well aware of the office politics right?
Will you just tell me whatís wrong?
Meghan, I heard... - - Madam your tea.
I heard they are planning to fire you.
As in? On what grounds?
Irregular attendance, poor performance.
I heard you've got warnings a couples of times.
And that too for constantly disrupting office ambience?
Meghan, I think you should come today & speak to him. -
- About what?
The warning wasn't for my performance.
...but for my torn jeans, smudged kohl & Soho chappals.
How does it matter what I wear to a backend job?
Please... I do my work
And how can I help it if men in the office canít stop their toungues...
...from rolling out if they see something remotely female!
I understand but listen.
There's nothing one can do, right Ira?
But... - - We both know that.
Anyway forget it. I'll call you later.
You have reached the voice mail of Shantanu Gupta.
He will call back when he is free from his mischievous activities.
Good morning. Remember me?
Good morning.
It seems the morning isn't that good?
As a kid I couldn't go to the loo alone as I was scared of ghosts.
But all the fear would vanish in the morning.
It's often the same with suicide cases.
People donít feel like dying in the morning.
Is it the same with you?
I'm about to lose my job in the next 24 hours.
My marriage with my friend of 14 years has been called off.
My father...
...doesn't care about me anymore.
He's married a bitch after my mother passed away.
Tell me how can this rotten morning...
...sun change my life or my decision?
Point.
Therefore?
I can't find a reason to live Mr. Kar.
I donít want to live.
Excellent.
Than I'm assured you're dying & for that you will need help.
Your name?
Stop humming & tell me your name.
Meghan Sircar.
Meghan Sircar. Your father's name?
Dr. Chittaranjan Basu. - -What's all this?
Great! So you use your mother's last name? Good.
The film maker Sanjay uses his mother's first name. Sanjay Leela.
Here you go. Sign it please.
I'll fill up the rest of the details later.
What is this?
Don't worry. I'm not conning you off your property.
Not that there's much of it.
Anyway this is form no. 1B.
It says you're enrolling for our course with full consent.
Are you serious?
Seriously. This is form no. 1B
Oh no, I am talking about... -
- Now youíre being difficult.
We don't have time. You need to freshen up.
Pack your clothes for 3 days.
The class starts at 12 pm. Make it fast!
What class?
Why?
The last picnic of your life!
Hemlock Society!
The daughter at night & the father in the morning.
Can't you let us live in peace!
Youíre still sleeping? Where's Bubla?
Bubla?
Where the hell is Bubla?
Err... madam left in the morning.
There was a man with her & a bag.
What? Who? Not Shantanu?
No sir. - - You know where sheís gone?
No idea sir. - - Hope you know farming!
Because your job will not last long.
You have no information about the apartment!
What are you here for?
I mean... sir... - - Shut up! Ridiculous!
I can't believe l'm doing this.
What? Suicide?
No.
Leaving home with you like this.
It happens.
What happens is...
...when one comes so close to death...
...one often gets bouts of being adventurous.
You know... an ant grows wings only to die, etc.
Did you just call mean ant?
That was just an example. A metaphor you see.
No, it's a simile.
Brilliant! You got me!
Hey will you marry me?
Seriously! Trust me, from my very childhood...
...this is exactly what Iíve been looking for.
Excuse me! What?
Oh sorry. That's not possible. My fault.
You're committing suicide.
A wedding night on a planchette is hardly any fun.
Do you know youíre simultaneously characterless & garrulous?
Why & why?
Youíve girlfriend right? And youíre proposing marriage to me?
Madam those are twenty twenty cricket matches.
What I'm proposing is a test match.
I am a little like Saif Ali Khan's character...
...in the film Dil Chahta Hai.
Or the character Rajesh Khanna played in the film Mere Jeevan Sathi.
I mean, I love the idea of loving.
By the way I hope the simile was correct madam?
Perfect. Go on.
Thanks. But you see...
...I need something to bind me inspite of all that love.
I like the honesty with which you're comparing yourself...
...to a cow or a goat.
Thank you.
I am looking for someone who'll be an all-rounder.
Someone who will wake up early...
...sing beautifully...
...look beautiful...
...clean, cook & do nice handicraft...
Rolling joints is the only handicraft I'm good at.
By any chance are you looking for a domestic help?
You didn't let me finish.
Someone whoíll be intellectually, emotionally...
...& conjugally compatible with me.
She'll know Feluda, Neruda & Derrida... equally well.
Derrida?
You're good.
No but tell me something which I don't know.
I am better?
Possible. But I'll be the 2nd best for only a few more days.
After that you'll bid farewell to this world and then...
...l'm the best!
I'm the best!
I'm the best!
You are the best. I'm the best!
I'm the best!
What happened?
What's wrong? - - Oh that girl...
...pretty, sings well... tell me her name.
Excuse me, who is this?
Oh no, youíre getting me wrong.
That friend of Bubla's. I can't recall her name.
Works at the bank... lira?
Yes, Ira! Give me her number. - - Why?
I can't reach Bubla on her phone.
The guard said she's left the house with a man...
...who's not her fiancÈ.
What do you mean?
Can't she go out with anyone but Shantanu - - With a packed bag?
That too early morning when she usually sleeps? No, she can't.
Youíre weird.
Either you donít react at all or you overreact.
Please give me the number.
So Chitto isn't fearless after all?
9051063888
Triple eight? - - Don't worry so much.
Look!
This is what she has left stuck to the door!
"Bye. You guys stay well."
Then what else...
...my father had left me a lot of money.
I was wondering what to do with it.
I learnt guitar& created a band.
I wasn't satisfied.
Iíve always loved Hindi films.
So I made a film city like the Ramoji Film city.
I got involved in 2 kinds of parties.
Political at day. Psychedelic at night.
Ultimately...
...I formed this Hemlock Society.
But conducting such classes is illegal.
So, under the veil of a film city...
So, under the veil of a film city...
You are a rockstar!
Another tick mark then.
And how will our lndian films do without songs?
How will the music directors survive?
It's just that itís been a really long time since...
...I saw an open sky like this.
Have you ever been to a village?
I mean a real village, not a resort?
No madam.
I'm a very urban man. I love the city.
I read stories of rural India sitting in an air conditioned room.
Flyovers & tramlines are my horizons.
Not a village person.
Go to a village some day if you can.
I've gone there with my father a few times as a kid.
He was in the phase of serving the country back then.
The evening drops suddenly there without a warning.
And the entire experience of fishing, I mean...
...in the local way... it's simply mind-boggling.
And then...
...at night...
...in a sea of fire flies and... - - & a hell lot of mosquitoes.
Please let me finish!
Stop being a spoilsport. - - Sorry.
I'd sit amongst fireflies, munching on puffed rice...
...dad would tell horror stories...
...& my motherís...
...my motherís songs.
Can I...
...ask you...
...a question?
Don't worry. I won't ask if you miss your mother, in a choked voice.
Everyone does that.
Even when their mother is around.
My question is... what kind of songs?
Mostly Tagore's songs and...
...old Bengali films songs.
Amongst new songs, the one l just sang.
This song is by Siddhartha Roy, right?
My favourite Bengali singer-song writer after Kabir Suman.
In facta family favourite.
What happened?
No. Nothing. Comes it.
The entire package of your village is very tempting.
You'll do a good job at Kundu Travels or Thomas Cook.
Make a trip instead of blabbering.
Very well. Let's go.
Be my guide. And donít worry. We'll sleep in different rooms.
Haha ha. Very funny.
Okay letís plan along weekend next month.
So? You'll spoil the sport?
Isn't it?
Nothing.
So I asked her to go talk to them once.
But you know uncle. She's so hyper.
How can Shantanu not know of the new situation at her work?
Have you talked to him recently?
Not recently. I think he must be caught up with some office work.
I called him twice last week, he didnít answer.
I tried him twice today too. Unreachable.
Has he changed his phone number?
I don't think so. He wouldíve informed... He knows.
I mean I called him...
...to ask him to speak to her.
He said...
...I mean what he said was... -
- What did he say?
They broke up last night.
What! - - What do you mean?
Everything was fine last month.
There's only a week left. The cards have been printed.
I mean, that's not important.
I just remembered so... -
That fat man, square jaw... we met at Roy's party...
...his wife is very beautiful... what's his name?
Who's wife? - - Oh God!
He's a big shot in the Police! Tell me his name!
Koushik Datta? ...Yes.
Give me his number. - Yes.
No wait!
Come with me.
I'm coming to such a huge studio forth first time.
This is not a studio. It's a film town.
Dream factory.
Everything is fake here.
Only the dream is real.
And those who make the dream?
Oh no.
Why are you in such a hurry?
Shah Rukh Khan has said...
"the pictureís not yet over, my friend"
Get that?
Gazing at the stars, maybe you won't call me.
When my footprints fall no more on this abode...
When I stop ferrying my boat at this ferry stop.
When my footprints fall no more on this abode...
Friends.
A warm welcome to all of you...
...to our Hemlock Society's 3 days' workshop.
Suicide.
The word comes from 2 Latin words.
Sui... meaning self.
And cidium... meaning killing.
So friends, in the next 3 days...
...we shall attain complete...
...technical & psychological knowledge regarding suicide.
Let me introduce you to our faculty for different courses.
I'll begin with, Dr. Dhamani Ghosh... our expert at wrist slashing.
Suicide by drug overdose, will be taught by Dr. Dayal Khashnobish.
For suicide by hanging, we have Prof. Jhulan Gupta.
For knowledge of various ways of immolation Prof. Shikha Dhar.
For suicide by being run over by train we have Sir Trainlate Biswas.
Aye-aye.
For methods of jumping off bridge...
...there is Prof. Setu Venkataraman.
Prof. Raktim Ganguly will take classes on guns.
Apart from these for miscellaneous ways we have Miss Sella Neous.
Out training routine:
After every class, 2 of you will be given an exercise.
One of you will make a plan & the other will find it's flaws &...
...weaken the will power of their partner.
This will be followed by viva-voce & a cerficate in the end.
Now we shall all proceed towards our respective classes.
Another thing.
Don't forget...
...many professional and infamous people...
...have committed suicide extraordinarily.
Ernest Hemingway.
Sigmund Freud.
Adolf Hitler.
Sylvia Plath.
Van Gogh. Socrates and others.
So you must respect them.
Always remember...
...our motto is...
..."Die, but don't do a faux pas"
So? Have you been able to choose...
...how you want to die?
I don't know.
I understand. Do one thing...
...attend all the classes by turn.
Start with Dhamani Ghosh's class.
Take a right from the door, first room on the left.
Good morning.
Today weíll learn a popular way of committing suicide.
Slashing the wrist.
Weíve all tried this method at youth but...
...in most cases it's become a child's play.
That's because...
Yes?
Sir, I think Iíve been sent to the wrong class.
Why? How do you want to die? Of old age?
Not really sir. I want to commit suicide.
Actually sir I'm a big fan of thrillers.
Iíve read in books & also seen in films...
...they push in air from an empty syringe into the vein... -
- That's it.
You mustíve mentioned 'vein', & they sent you here.
Though this is not in our syllabus this year...
...I will still tell you, sit.
Kindly forget the plan of injecting...
...an air-filled syringe into your body.
Because that is a myth.
Though Mr. Ananda Kar told me that...
...Mr. Amithabh Bachchan had threatened...
...to kill someone in this way in the film 'Bemisaal'.
I must say that was a result of wrong research.
Because if we inject less than 40 cc of air...
...then one has no chance of a heart attack.
And they don't make such huge syringes.
Unless you want to inject a...
...rhinoceros or an elephant with tetanus.
Then what do I do sir?
It's been my wish for the longest time sir.
So? You must understand.
Be strong.
Explain to yourself that slashing the wrist is...
...equally thrilling & glamorous.
I must mention slashing the wrist is typically & female phenomenon.
But the men in this room must not think...
...dying this way will make them any less of a man.
The question is...
...slashing exactly which vein will mean a definite death...
...& the angle in which the cut has to be made.
45 degree or 90 degree?
And how much of an incision should be made?
Would you need ice or hot water?
Cutting the wrong vein wrongly will only cause blood loss not death.
Volunteering at a blood donation camp would be better.
Let's begin then.
Now I will show you some cuts.
What happened? Iíve not even begun.
Don't lose it so soon.
You'll have to make the cut yourself later.
Please come in.
Sir called just now.
Your daughter is missing? - - Yes.
Not my neighbourís, my daughter.
Okay.
Fine. What happened? Did you have a fight?
How does it matter if we did have a fight?
Haven't you ever had a fight with your father?
We didnít have that option back then.
He either gave me ice cream or hit me black & blue.
Sometimes both. - - No!
I haven't hit my daughter while treating her to ice-cream...
...if thatís what youíre asking!
Chitto please!
Don't create scene.
He's just trying to help us. - Is it so?
This isnt paparazzi about a father daughter case?
See Mr. Chitto...
...I understand you're in immense tension.
I too have children.
No.
We didn't fight at all.
She doesn't even live with us.
Troubled background. - - Let's focus now.
What should we do now? - - Wait for some time.
Then you could inquire at various hospitals.
The police will do it's job.
I'll call the Missing Person's Squad right now.
Photograph? ...We're not carrying any.
But weíll give it to you soon. Any specifications?
Anything but her nursery times will do.
So what's your plan?
Why do you want to commit suicide?
The hair on my legs grow very fast...
...I had a moustache too when was a kid.
That's your reason for suicide?
I'm telling you my plan.
So I carry an imported razor with me.
This Sunday... no...
...sir said Monday, in class.
Monday the neighbours will go to office, the locality will be empty.
I have to take a bowl full of ice...
...and then...... But why do you want to commit suicide?
Iíve never ever seen my parents.
I had a photograph of their's...
Where did it go?
My uncle must have torn it.
My distant uncle who brought me up.
Uncle brought me to Kolkata to get me contact lens.
I can't see properly.
And I look ugly with the glasses so...
...after getting me the contact lens he sold me off.
It would...
...hurt a lot.
It used to hurt a lot you know.
Those huge...
...heavy men...
...all suited & booted.
It would hurt a lot initially.
They don't like skin hair.
They bought me that imported razor.
They'd give me soaps, shampoos so much of money!
My eyesight is getting worse gradually.
Their demands have increased. It's festive season.
They need lots of escorts.
You won't understand. I can't carry on anymore.
Your turn.
Why do you want to die? Is your situation even worse?
Why are you wandering with a candle like Wahida Rehman?
Sorry.
I canít sleep.
Do you want some...
...sleeping pills?
Could you be serious for once?
I'm totally depressed. - - What's new in that?
You don't get it. It isn't that type of a depression.
After what I saw & learnt all day...
...seeing death in such great details...
...so closely... - - So you've got cold feet?
Yes. - - What?
No.
I don't know.
After I met Hiya l felt like... What?
...I felt like I'm much happier.
Go sleep. You've a class tomorrow.
Didn't I say? I can't sleep.
So I'm Waahida Rehman.
But why're you singing in the middle of night dressed up like a poet?
In the filmís very 1st reel Iíve mentioned that...
...I have all the qualities of a standard Hindi film hero.
Only in case of entering rooms, I prefer doors...
...over breaking windows.
Don't laugh.
And why not?
You see laughing is harmful for your training.
Let me tell you an incident.
Once, a suicide note was found at the Golden Gate bridge.
It read...
I am walking down this bridge.
If anybody looks at me & smiles just once...
...then I will not jump off this bridge.
Just think about it.
It could be such a blunder if someone...
...by mistake had smiled at this person!
One human life would have been saved madam!
A laughter can be so very dangerous!
Goodnight. - - Goodnight.
Now lift your gun to your head.
Keep a gap of 4inches.
4 inches I said.
What I'm saying is this position of your's...
...is incorrect.
The nozzle of the gun might come off with the recoil.
Isn't it?
What if it rushes past your scalp?
Your scalp's natural vegetation may disappear forever.
It might create a hole in that...
...expensive curtain in your drawing room.
Neighbours might call the police. Public embarrassment.
Hence what I suggest is...
...holding it against your head is much safer.
That way...
...he brother...
...Oh god! Gurung...
...when you hold it to your head...
...there's a 99.99% chance that you'll shoot yourself.
But still...
...in a lot of cases weíve observed...
...the victim has survived.
So
...to be 100% sure...
...let's see you open your mouth...
Put it in.
Put it in.
The rest of you follow the action. Come on!
Come on. Now pull the trigger.
Pull the trigger son.
This gun is not loaded right?
Oh yes. This one's a blank fire.
They send a lot every year.
Though they sent loaded ones last 2 years.
That's not a problem.
What's important is to learn it.
Most important thing is experience.
The sound.
The feeling.
The thudding of the heart. Don't worry it's not that difficult.
Come on pull it son.
Pull it! Come on.
Okay l understand.
Scared? Don't be scared. Everyone close your eyes.
Gurung keep an eye. Close your eyes everyone.
Hey last bench! Come on be strong!
What? Come on pull the trigger now!
I'm counting.
One.
Wow, good.
Two.
And three!
Death by heart attack due to running isn't there in the syllabus.
Can I get some water please! - - Oh!
You shouldíve said that.
At your service madam Meghan!
I need to call home & speak to my father.
Oh no! - - I want to go home.
Not possible. You've left your phone home.
Anyway you didn't leave it capable of calling anywhere on earth.
Landline? Your phone?... Do you remember the number?
98345... 9835...
You can't even recall your dad's phone number?
You remind me of a punishment given by our Hindi film villain Ajit.
Liquid Oxygen.
Liquid isnít letting you live & oxygen isn't letting you die.
Why are you doing this to me?
Why are you behaving like this?
See...
...we've spend such a nice time together. I mean...
...between all of this haven't you felt that...
- Felt what?
Have you ever thought of me?
Thought of you? Wait... -
Okay now let me put this like...
...if you have even for a moment...
...liked me... - -Could you make it short please?
It's sounding like a soggy Bengali soap's dialogue.
I just want to go home!
See miss Sircar...
...you may've come here by your own choice...
...but this place has certain rules.
I can't break them for you alone.
That'll create bad example.
Youíre still left with 1 day of your course.
Finish it & you can go home, Hardwar or Mogadishu... anywhere...
...I won't mind. But now you'll go to your workshop.
Your workshop partner Col. Samaresh Bagchi...
...is waiting for you.
And remember...
...in case youíre thinking of escaping...
...our security guards know very well...
...that you all have come here to die.
So they wonít kill you.
They believe in breaking bones.
Is this a way to solve any problem?
Is this a way to solve any problem?
Why are you people sitting here?
Any news?
But why are you waiting outside?
We have your number in our file.
In fact I was just thinking of calling you.
What if itís the wrong number?
What if your cell phone's battery gets over?
What if the landline went dead? Why take a chance?
Anyway, forget that we're here.
Will you kindly tell us if thereís any update?
3 cups of lemon tea in my room.
Come.
Why lemon tea?
What's wrong?
Why all the build-up? - - Chitto it's okay
Please sit.
I don't know really. - - What do you mean?
Then did you call us to solve cryptic crosswords? -
- Chitto!
Weíre all trying to do our best to get her back.
You were saying something...
...about Bubla?
Today at daybreak...
...a dead body has been found in the suburbs.
It's a suicide case.
Identification has not yet been done.
But according to the photograph you gave.
And her age you mentioned...
...it's nearly...
...would you please come with me?
Good morning young lady! Do you realize you ëre late?
That would mean 5 rounds around the field carrying a sandbag.
Yes sir.
'Colonel' if you please?
Yes, Colonel. - Where do we start?
Do you ask the questions or?
You could ask. - -Great!
So have you planned how youíre dying?
Sleeping pills? - - Not a gun?
No. I'll not be able to do that.
Where will you get the pills?
Dr. Khashnobish has given us a list and...
...I could forge my dad's prescription... Okay.
So, when & at what time are you planning to execute your plan?
I don't know.
May be...
...day after.
Morning around eleven
So, okay on 28th February, Tuesday...
...at 11:00 hours you're fleeing from the battlefield.
No I'm not running away... -
- Why are you running away?
I broke up with my boyfriend.
There was a boy in our regiment during the Pakistan war.
Newly married.
Very lovely and very stubborn.
The boy had alone detained the 1st armoured division...
...for 1 whole night at Khemkaren.
He blew 3 of their tanks off with his life at stake.
A suicide rather.
Why did you laugh?
Do not mention your boyfriend in your suicide note.
Doctor, police, press...
they'll all laugh.
Even your suicide note might burst out laughing.
Write something better.
Something more worthwhile.
After all...
...youíve grown up on this country's subsidy...
...this world's natural reserves.
Don't you have a responsibility?
Wait let me give you some options.
How about suicide to protest against killing of seals...
...for fur in Canada?
Or deforestation of Amazon's rain forest?
Brutal army rule, how about that?
I don't know why you're giving me this free advice.
You yourself are...
...running away too? Isn't it?
Do you need your boyfriend when you take a dump?
Excuse me?
Oh please tell me, when you shit...
...or when you strangle the pervert in a public bus...
...or when you run to push the window wide-open to see the rainbow...
...do you need your boyfriend at that time?
No, I don't.
I do.
Not your boyfriend but other people.
Col. Samaresh Bagchi needs someone else.
That man who ran all night with 2 men on his back...
...that man who's name scared the life out of enemies...
...that man who's evenings were sought after by the prettiest of women...
...that man needs other people to help him.
See.
Suicides a serious crime which you commit against...
...those you leave behind.
So I want a genuine student.
Someone who has a concrete humatarian ground for leaving.
Not some self-pitying teenage cribster.
In England...
...if you have a Baedeker handy...
...I mean a timetable...
...committing suicide would actually be a piece of cake.
But...
...unfortunately in this part of the world...
...the train schedules & timings...
...actually punctuality wise...
...is not quite up to the mark.
Youíre waiting for the train lying on the track.
The rescue team will reach you before the train does & save you.
To escape being rescued here's what you can do.
As you can see in this diagram...
...you can pick out a bush...
...within the radius of 5 meters from the track.
& pretend to do something or theother... like...
...peeing continuously perhaps.
And as soon as the train comes you take a plunge.
Like this.
Because at least in death you deserve certainty.
Sir, could you repeat that bit in Bengali?
The peeing bit sir?
What are we going to do now?
Now we shall see some photographs.
Our ex-students...
...have passed out from my class...
...with a high distinction certificate.
And then what did they do?
Beautifully, successfully & sweetly...
...hanged themselves.
I know all of you will follow their path.
Raju Singh. - - Wow! Killer man!
Yes, this is what I want! - - Oh no!
Mondodori De.
Oh freak man!
Oh no, she's fainted!
These kids!
How will you learn if you behave like this in the very beginning?
Someone call Chitragupta.
Take her to the health centre.
Understand? It's very simple.
The important thing is, how you can bend the system.
Mind it.
Are you okay with any flyover?
Dhakuria, A.J. C Bose road flyover, or any building...
No sir, I think a bridge would be better.
There will be more people.
I couldn't make it to Page 3. Let it at least be page 1.
You've to go for your check up tomorrow.
Remember that. - - There's no point.
The state l'm in, every report will say...
...that I'm actually in...
...coma! - Chitto, stop speaking nonsense.
What?
Didn't I tell you so?
So, what happened 2 years ago... -
Hello Shantanu, are you fine? Can I join you?
Which flavour is this ice-cream? Chocolate?
But didn't you want butter-scotch for the marriage menu?
Must be her choice?
And exactly whoís this?
I... - - Chitto don't create scene here.
Scene? I just want to have a small chat with my son-in-law.
Son-in-law? - - May I sit?
I'll just sit for a while. Thank you!
You too pull a chair & sit.
So yes my dudette, let me tell you who I am.
He was my daughter's fiancÈ.
Sorry what? - - Of course you donít understand.
FiancÈ?
What? - - Shreya, I think you should leave.
What's he saying? - -Ah! Shreya, what a lovely name!
Such a sweet name! ...Stop it!
Fine, I'll make it short.
I know that you don't find my sudden intrusion very cool.
But since my predicament is so uncool, you'll have to bear with me.
Chitto please! - - I'm your man's father-in-law.
Chitto let's go... What?
No, I mean... - - I'm sorry.
Might have been father-in-law, I mean Shantanu's fiancÈís father.
My daughter Meghna loved your boyfriend Shantanu a lot.
But since Meghna had a pathetic father like me...
...Shantanu meant everything to her... Iover, friend, father.
She couldn't take it when their marriage was called off so she left.
It's been 48 hours...
...since Meghna has gone missing, Shantanu.
I thought I should...
...inform you.
Bye.
Sorry.
Brilliant!
Unbelievable.
Couldn't you have told me all this earlier?
I... I had to get humiliated like this?
Youíre just amazing.
I'm talking to you!
I'll call you. - - What? Shantanu...
Where are you off to?
Ready for the last session?
Do I have a choice here?
What are you doing here?
What the hell!
I've enrolled too.
But...
...you weren't there in the class.
I'm taking private classes.
Or else itíll be a pandemonium Everyone will keep staring.
They'll ask for autographs & photographs.
Or theyíll ask, who I am sleeping with.
Or... if l'll perform at their locality for less money.
Neither will they learn...
...nor I. - But...
...why are you here? I mean...
...I thought you were rich, successful, happy.
Money? Yes. Success, yes.
But happiness is a difficult concept maíam.
Say l write a song.
Now after finishing the composition...
... start admiring it myself...
...it feels weird.
What kind of an artist am I...
... start liking my own songs?
I donít understand this. Why are you here?
Why do you want to commit suicide? You don't have a reason.
You write & sing so beautifully... - - Is that true?
True?
Of course it is!
It's been 15 years... whether in sorrow or happiness...
...l've slept & woken up to your songs!
Through your songs you've become a goddamn family member!
You can't do this! You can't commit suicide.
Nice.
Feels nice to meet a pretty fan like you before I die.
But I'll have to die according to the optimality of death.
Isn't it?
What's that now?
See, creative people like us...
...have a definite age to die.
If we live even after that, simply put...
...we start rotting.
And then we start doing mediocre work.
Even if we succeed, it's just a reflected glory of the past.
Living and dying becomes all the same.
Have you gone completely berserk?
Why are we discussing mediocrity or failure?
Each & every album of your's has won the Gold Disc award!
Everyone from the critics to the ordinary people love your work.
Then try to understand...
...try to realize the pressure on me.
Now when I'll start releasing my ordinary works...
...will your history spare me?
What'll happen to my coveted "genius" status?
Rather this is the correct time!
I'll get an astounding obituary.
My corpse will be kept at a prominent place for hours.
There'll be memorial programs on TV channels, the masses will mourn.
What a crescendo!
You've gone mad.
You cannot do this! - - Of course l can!
I can! Why can't I?
Jim Morrison could, so could Kurt Cobain. Why can't l?
Look...
...my music has still not gone bad.
leave now...
...then people will remember me, respect me.
Or else if l start losing it at old age...
Why are you thinking this way?
How do I explain?
Rabindranath Tagore? Think of him!
He's made music, he's worked for so long!
Kabir Suman? He started singing at 40 & you're... -
- Youíre incorrigible.
They are ingenious legends & I'm just a musical misfit.
Just shut up!
Shut up!
I'm sorry.
You can't do this.
You, your songs...
...my motherís memories are entwined with them.
You can't do this. Don't take that away from me please.
One second.
Before you start crying for good...
...tell me...
...you've yourself come here to assure your death, right?
Now if you die, what happens to those memories?
Will your ghosts it alone...
...& make chaplets out of those memories?
You are your mother's most important memento.
Not just for yourself but for the entire world.
I'm not blaming you Shantanu.
One needs a particular level of IQ & EQ to be able to value Meghan.
Most people donít have that.
You're an old friend of her's so I thought maybe you have it.
Infact you've survived till now because you do have a bit of it.
You are still annoyed with me.
So you can't understand my point of view.
Towards the end we did not have anything to say.
In fact...
...we could just hardly complete half sentences and...
...we would exactly know what the other person has to say or do.
I...
...in this entire episode of marriage & courtship, I was losing my friend.
A friend who... -
- Your friend is anyway lost Shantanu.
She's got lost within this city's lanes & alleys.
And you know what...
...even if in a small way...
...l, you...
...this city...
...we all are responsible.
Goodnight.
Listen...
...send me message when you reach home.
Hey!
Just! - - Take it easy.
I'll fall. Relax!
Comedown. - - Relax, I'm not committing suicide.
Wait.
Quality control.
It's my duty to see that our students get all facilities properly.
You are seriously amazing!
Nice.
By the way what've you been up to?
Long-time no see!
This is not done.
I'm not being able to plan any sweet song sequence at night.
Are you angry because l behaved a little villainous that day?
Don't be angry with me.
Please donít be angry.
Remember, villains too are after all human beings.
Youíre just considering the evil streak.
What about the love hiding beneath?
So? You're course is complete, right?
When do you die?
Come on tell me madam, when do you die?
I...
...I won't commit suicide.
What!
You'll not commit suicide? But why?
Why?
Because I don't want to. - - No! One second...
...you don't want to, as in? Are you kidding me here?
We put so much effort in bringing you here...
...we trained you & now youíre saying you'll not die?
Sorry but...
...I don't feel like dying, what do I do?
Sorry but not happening!
Absolutely not!
So you'll not die...
...& neither will you tell me the reason for this change!
You have to tell me the reason.
I don't know. I just don't feel like it.
Wow!
Brilliant! "I just don't feel like it"!
Spoken like a truly spoilt brat huh?
Hello.
Youíre the spoilt brat here.
You have a rich father so you have nothing to do.
So you're passing your time with all this.
Hemlock Society my left foot!
Don't speak a word against the Society, I'm warning you.
At least I'm not whimsical like you!
One moment you want to die, one moment you don't. Ridiculous!
What has happened to you suddenly?
Are you scared? Or tense?
Is it that you saw death so closely that...
...youíre done with that little delusion of yours?
Or did your dad's face flash in front of your eyes suddenly?
That father who has silently loved you all his life.
And youíve always misunderstood him just...
...because he is not expressive enough?
Or did you remember your mother?
Yes. That too is possible!
Had your mother been alive today...
...wherever she is right now...
...she'd have been so happy!
She'd have felt so proud to see your dead body.
She'd think, "Oh what a fighter my daughter is!".
Please keep my mother out of this.
Not even this one?
Now I've got it right.
No matter how much you smash Tagore...
...you know very well that once you're gone...
...you will be gone forever.
And you'll never be able to comeback to life again.
You'll miss out on this beautiful world, Sidhhartha Roy's songs...
...you'll miss out on delish food & the festivities...
...the sheer madness of dancing to the music of life!
You'll never go to Venice, never romance on a gondola!
You'll miss the thrill of seeing...
...an African cheetah's eyes in the dark!
You'll never again watch Sachin Tendulkar's batting madam!
Never ever!
So? These are your reasons?
Aren't they?
Come on now answer!
- Yes! Yes. Youíre right Mr. Know-it-all! Happy?
Delighted.
Good youíre not dying.
Just donít go blabber about our society outside.
A student of ours sitting with grandchildren at80...
...would be of quite shame to us.
Our reputation will be ruined.
With the increasing competition...
"Let's do, let's die club"
"Association of seriously suicidal students".
Hope they've arranged for your departure?
Okay, since you're not dying, be happy.
We have your number in our record book.
We'll contact you if necessary. Bye.
There's one more reason. - -What?
There's another reason why l changed my decision.
Oh no! Did I miss something?
Momos from the restaurant Tibetan Delight? Shah Rukh's films?
I've fallen in love with you. - - I'm so jacked.
- Excuse me?
No nothing. Love... err...
...why did you have to... bother yourself?
Being a girl I'm proposing to you & youíre cracking jokes?
You're not getting it. After all, youíre my...
...'our' client.
There's a working equation you see.
And I donít mix business with pleasure.
In that case the client satisfaction too is your duty, right?
Youíre still not getting it.
...
a very...
...ordinary man... Oh shut up!
Stop fishing for compliments.
You know very well that you're... what was that...
...a man who is an "all-rounder".
Good looking, sensitive, educated.
You sing well too. Most importantly youíve got nearly...
...nearly as good a sense of humour as my father's.
Though you've a bad habit of playing T-20 but once you...
...start playing international test cricket, that'll be gone.
Well thank you...
...madam Electra... but...
...youíve known me for just 3 days.
So what?
Iíve seen people turn into strangers even after 14 years.
And...
...about the time weíve known each other for...
...it should be worthwhile & not long.
Bravo! Well said!
Madam, you nailed it!
But madam, too much love Could kill you.
Look Ananda.
I'm being brutally honest with you.
I would appreciate if you be the same.
I mean...
...there's no obligation that...
... like you in a certain way...
...you'll have to do the same... No.
It's not like that.
Not just...
...in this way or that...
...I quite...
...I mean...
...in all the ways possible l...
...but then... -
- Then?
Lymphocytopenia.
Are you trying the tragic hero act now?
I seriously have lymphocytopenia.
Very low white blood corpuscles count.
I need blood transfusion every 6 months.
Doctors have already said...
...l'll survive 2 years at max.
Wake up. Weíve to go to the police station.
Hello.
No news till now.
No it's okay. Fine weíll manage.
How did the appraisals go?
What about HR?
Listen Raj, I think I need to extend my leave.
Will you just take care of that?
Thank you.
How many days will you stay on leave indefinitely?
Youíre saying that because l'm her stepmother?
Nihar.
I don't deserve to question your sincerity as her mother.
Sorry that l asked.
Why did you do this to me?
Day in day out, for hours...
...you shamelessly flirted with me knowing very well...
...I was on a rebound.
Vulnerable.
You took advantage of me. - - That's a part of the treatment.
At least initially it was.
What!
Which treatment?... Pro-life treatment.
To teach people to fall in love all over again...
...to believe in life again.
Coupled with the anti-suicide...
...mission of Hemlock Society... - - Wait a second.
How can Hemlock Society be anti-suicide? It's...
- That's a lie.
Students, teachers, security guards...
...all are theater actors.
Some did it for money, some because they wanted to.
The script is mine & the film city is real.
So the location is free.
Siddharatha Roy?... South Point school...
...Jadavpur University...
A friend for 16 years, 4 years' senior though. - Neat.
Hemlock Society makes you feel the fear of death very closely...
...which makes you realize...
...that weíre much better off in our lives than a lot of others.
Suicide is not a solution. It can never be.
Nice!
Brilliant!
And suddenly what triggered the need to do this great social work?
Because of...
...the sudden diagnosis of...
...lymphocytopenia.
Suddenly l came to know...
...that l have just another 2 years.
started valuing life more than I used to.
Suddenly.
You couldíve spared the pro-life treatment.
Anti-death was enough.
I would've if l knew I'll fall ill myself in the process.
Is your guinea pig free to go now?
Yes!
That's because a lot of people are waiting for this guineapig.
And the scientist will wait...
...till the last moment for the lab to shut down.
Okay?
Cut it!
Who's that girl? Get her out of the zone!
Weird girl. Your shot was good sir!
One more take.
Towel.
Going for take two!
Lfit's the cable operator please tell them that... -
Sorry.
Yes I'll reach, I'm in the car.
Let's talk it out with him.
I've short listed 3 cases. 2 of them will come tomorrow.
We'll treat them simultaneously.
But we need to alter the script a little.
I have problem with the colour of the uniform. It should be khaki.
I'll see to it.
We need some fund for the cafeteria.
I've left some cheques with Mr. Mukherji.
I haven't got last month's TDS certificate.
Neither have I. - - Yes, the TDS is a problem.
I have something to say regarding this. I'm a senior citizen.
Why did they cut my TDS? - - Aren't they supposed to?
No of course not. - - They'll refund it later.
What's the full form of TDS? - - Tax Deducted at Source.
I've already got my TDS certificate. I don't know why you haven't.
Why aren't we getting it? Because weíre young?
Then why are they cutting the TDS?
I think they will not give the money finally.
Exactly! I think so too. You're so right!
Listen, don't lose your temper.
You'll get your certificate on time.
Is money everything in life? - - You're right, very true.
It's important for me. I'm not doing anything for charity.
Just a second.
Just a second.
Hey.
You go take some rest. I'll manage it here.
But you have a concert. - - That's not your problem.
Mind your own business.
Take a break. Go.
We all know about the blunder regarding the TDS.
There's no point... - - I think rules should be followed.
How much did they cut from yours? - - 10%.
See, don't be angry with me.
Tinting booze time!
Here.
Cheers. - - Cheers!
Chitto would be very jealous if he came to know of our booze party.
Oh no. He was himself supposed to come down. He got stuck.
Anyway he'd not say anything.
Even if he did...
...you are unleashed your 5000 watts mile...
...& dad would melt then & there.
Who's calling so late?
Unknown number. Should I receive it?
Receive it, you might find your Prince Charming.
Hello who's this?
Yes, how are...
When?
Where?
I'm coming.
What happened honey? Are you alright?
Siddhartha Roy called.
Ananda has been hospitalized.
Emergency transfusion.
Which way's the lift?
The doctor has arrived. He is inside.
The blood transfusion is happening.
His health deteriorated last night.
This morning when I got him here he was very critical.
I don't know how he's now. - - I'm Dr. Chittaranjan Basu.
Pleased to meet you. - - Hello.
What's the doctor saying?
The same thing. There's not much we can do now.
Transfusion frequency will increase...
...& the rest depends on his immunity, how long he'll survive.
Apart from that thereís not much left to do. Let's see.
Oh my God! This is like the climax of a film!
Everybody is here. - - Jokes apart...
...did you ask about your dosages? - - What's the point?
Only your prayers can help me now. - - Stop kidding.
Please wait outside. I'll call you.
Do you have to act like a tragic hero?
Tragic hero?
I had imagined so much more.
A hundred violins would play.
I'd have tubes inside my nose & ears.
Then you would enter the room running in slow motion.
And then I'd keep my head on your lap...
...but alas!
That spoilsport said, I'll pull it off for another year.
Is that done, tell me?
Do you know that you're a very evil man?
Come here.
Are you from the revolutionary town of Chambal?
Why are you constantly enraged?
I can't take this tragic hero act of yours anymore.
Please cut the drama.
Take rest.
I'll come back tomorrow.
Nurse.
Are you going out again? - - Yes.
You have a problem with that?
None whatsoever.
I just need to know when you'll be back.
Is that so?
Are you planning to call someone over?
Even if you did, you'd only sit listening to Bengali songs...
...eat fried rice & chilli chicken.
You donít have the inclination for anything else.
If your idea of togetherness is 24X7 making out like rabbits...
...then no, I don't have the inclination.
Oh sweetie...
...for the enthusiasm you also need real good accessories...
...which you don't... -
Accessories!
You're going out to look for that? To get laid.
What's your rate these days?
It's usually free for men.
And in the mood...
...for women as well.
But forthe3rd variety...
...the word "rate" isn't valid.
I usually keep them for fun.
Just for a laugh.
You know how to swim?
Hello sir!
Do you know how to swim?
What?
Do you know swimming?
Yes I know how to swim.
Anderson Club.
Dog-paddling.
Do you have a weak heart? - - What?
She left me!
She left me! - - Not again!
Every night I... . . Who wants to know that?
My question is, do you have a history of a heart attack?
No. Nothing like that. Never.
Then donít jump. There's no use.
There's very little chance that you'll die.
Why?
Because...
...the moment you jump your intoxication will go...
...due to the cold water.
Then you'll start panicking.
And then that Anderson Club's dog-paddling...
...will soon turn you into Greg Louganis.
More importantly the coast-guard launch visits every 10 minutes.
They'll pick you up in 2 minutes.
Then you'll go straight to jail.
Then what do I do?
What do I do?
I want to die! - - Sure you will die.
For what joy will you live?
But this should be done in an organized manner.
See, you've stopped your car on the Hugli bridge suddenly.
This is illegal.
Now people will gather.
Then police. And then jail.
Do you want that?
So I suggest...
...get into my car. Leave your car here.
We'll take it back later.
Come on.
No.
Sir, I'm telling you for your own good. Come with me.
One minute.
Where am I going?
Like you said, you want to die.
Look I...
...I run an organization called Hemlock Society.
We believe...
...if one wants to die, then it should be well organized.
Suicide is a very difficult job, isn't it?
Suicides easier said than done.
It requires technical knowledge, education & a strong will power.
Without these...
...suicide becomes attempted suicide in most cases.
And then comes...
...face loss...
...embarrassment, trauma...
...you could be imprisoned too.