JourneyQuest - Episode 5: Not a Zombie

Uploaded by ZombieOrpheusEnt on 18.10.2010

That counts! That still counts.
I'm so keeping that rock.
They're gonna blame me for this.
Not a Zombie
Kill them
>Gust of Wind<
>Meat Henge<
Cut me loose, you idiot!
With what? It's not like I have the sword!
I hate everything.
Blech! Orc.
Where do you think you're going, Pixie-Lisp?
Block! Parry! Wound!
Gods, I have missed violence.
I quake.
Still tied up.
Now, quickly!
Ow! Why?
You did this!
You and your flawed, retarded magic.
You turned our cleric into a zombie.
...not a zombie.
Don't cry right now.
You see, there are two basic types of undead.
You have your corporeals, zombies and ghouls and the like,
which are bodies without souls.
And then you have your incorpreals. Ghosts and spirits,
souls without bodies. You get the gist.
What you've managed to do,
which has eluded every necromancer and deathpriest in history,
I might add,
is to create a theoretically impossible form of undead:
An intelligent corporeal.
A soul with memories intact
trapped inside a rotting corpse.
thank you.
Thanks for that.
Meat Henge?
>Meat Henge<
I know, right?
One forever speaks the truth; the other always lies.
Make you choice, and quickly now, or everybody dies.
Thank you, scary ceiling voice.
I wasn't done.
Heed me.
I speak the truth. Mine is the correct path.
No. He lies.
His path will take you to your death.
Your death and eternal doom.
Of course you'd say that, you lying liar.
Don't be fooled by his lies.
No, he lies. The true path lies beyond my door--
Sod me. You didn't just rotting kill that guy!
I'm in a bit of a rush. So, if you could just perhaps--?
Gods, you just walked in here and threw a knife into his sodding face!
Well, actually, it was his chest, but...
Anyway. Which one of these doors is the right one?
If you're lying to me, I'll kill you.
If you're lying to me, I'll kill you.
Do you understand?
Do you want to die?
Is that it?
- Ah, well, all right, then. Let's make this happen! - Ye-he-hes!
- Yes, I want to die! Yes, yes, yes! Yes! - I heard you the first time. Enjoy the ride!
Odd. You're still alive.
No, I'm not!
Which means this is the safe path.
Holy rotting sod.
I don't see him.
He's gotta be around here somewhere.
Maybe he sussed out your ploy and left.
This is Glorion we're talking about.
He spent an entire day trying to shoot down a rainbow.
Does it hurt?
Being undead?
It kind of itches.
Honestly, I don't feel much of anything.
Oh, except for the burning resentment.
I'm sorry.
Getting killed by arrows. That hurt.
Oh, that's also your fault.
I am so sorry.
Drown in a sewer.
You should see this.
It's a dead naiad.
A water spirit.
How did this happen?
Gods and heroes, he actually did it.
He actually killed the river.
We should never have left him unattended.
Maybe he's back at camp.
Could you
please put some clothes on?
Right. Yeah, sorry.
is the Chosen One?
Did not see that coming.
You know, I didn't exactly volunteer.
Or this, for that matter.
It's a mistake. It has to be.
In agreement here. Now let's find a way to get rid of this
before somebody realizes it's gone.
Hello there.
Now, if you'll just slip this on,
we can get started.
Or that.
One forever speaks the truth; the other always lies.
Make your choice, and quickly now, or everybody dies.
Thank you, Matt Vancil.
- And that's a wrap. - Cut.