The Assassination Bureau (1969) - Full Movie

Uploaded by Kaka1082 on 02.07.2012

One cannot deny, I suppose, that murder has its uses in society.
But I must say that in the past,
it has been pursued with more enthusiasm than accuracy.
Explosive devices certainly went off, but usually in the wrong place... the right time,
or the right place at the wrong time.
Quite suddenly, all this inefficiency became a thing of the past.
Murders began to be committed with a sort of unholy precision.
A comprehensive service was now being offered by
the Assassination Bureau... Limited.
This is from your own paper, two weeks ago.
There is only one common factor in these killings: Ruthless efficiency.
No social or political bias, just murder as a fine art.
"Mesopotamia"? What the devil does that mean?
Personal Column of The Times, three weeks before Alderman J.T. Langer
was blown up by an exploding casket.
Berliner Morgenpost, two weeks before Count von Kissen
fell down the lift shaft at the Adlon Hotel.
- Our own paper. - Good heavens.
One week before the affair of the exploding Bible.
I believe this is how prospective clients contact this organization.
Employ me, and you can have my story.
But that's our paper again.
Find out who placed it. Get to Small Ads!
Pray, don't bother. I know who placed it.
- Who? - I did.
The ad has been answered, my name and address supplied.
I expect them to get in touch with me at any moment.
- Splendid. Splendid! - My lord.
You certainly are the New Woman incarnate, Miss Winter.
I slipped in unobserved so Miss Winter would talk freely.
I always talk freely. Who are you?
This is Lord Bostwick, the owner of our newspaper.
How do you do?
The newspaper business is a male preserve.
If you are plotting to breach the citadel, it should be done in privacy. Come.
Sit down. Sit down.
Put you to work in this office, and they'd all walk out.
But they'd leap to take you out to dinner.
Why should they ask me out to dinner?
Because you are a very attractive young woman.
There can be no sexual equality whilst women exploit their appearance.
I rigidly avoid it.
Yes, well, this lift will take us to my office.
- Allow me to offer you a little reviver. - I touch no spirituous liquor.
I should hope not. This is a fine Madeira.
I have a partiality for it, just as I have for adventurous women.
What, then, is your reaction to my proposal?
That this newspaper should support you to the full extent of its resources.
It is truly wonderful to find someone as
liberal as yourself in a position of power and authority.
Yes, indeed. It's not at all common.
My newspapers are only a means to an end.
I have a genuine concern for the political welfare of the world.
You'd be astonished if I told you of the courts in Europe where I wield power.
Behind the thrones, of course. I am a retiring man.
It will be an honor to work for you.
I'd like to keep it a secret between us.
- Why? - Because, Miss Winter,
if there's truth to what you say, I'd be a marked man for supporting you.
- I see. - You'll have to be satisfied,
- with the thin end of the wedge. - Very well.
I want your employment, and need your resources behind me.
In that case, sit down and tell me a little bit about your plan.
I must admit that one thing intrigues me.
- And what is that? - Apart from your desire
to prove women's equality with men, what is your object in contacting
- these organized assassins? - Surely that's obvious.
I want someone assassinated.
- Oh, I'm so sorry. - That's all right, lady. I'm used to it.
- Your matches. - It doesn't matter.
I've lost me eyes, lady, but I've still got my pride.
Yes, of course.
"Mr. Pemberty's bowler."
Pardon me, madam. Are you being attended to?
No. I've come to collect Mr. Pemberty's bowler.
- Mr. Pemberty's? - Yes.
Very hard-wearing felt, madam, from Mesopotamia.
I am sure Mr. Pemberty will be pleased with it.
Oh, I'm sure he will.
If you would care to take it, we will deliver it for you.
This way, madam.
Just through here, madam.
I must apologize for the lack of amenities,
but we don't usually cater for lady customers.
However, the journey will not take long.
Back. Back.
This way, madam.
These cloak-and-dagger precautions are an unfortunate necessity.
We try and keep them to a minimum.
Forgive me. A test for our customers. We're not used to dealing with ladies.
- Evidently. - An interesting reaction.
Men come on gruesome business, yet without exception
they are frightened out of their wits by a whiff of gunpowder.
You seem to be made of sterner stuff. Will you please be seated?
Miss Winter, you are not married.
You have, as far as we can ascertain, no romantic associations.
Whom, other than a husband or lover, could a young lady wish to kill?
- You know a lot about me. - Naturally, or you'd not be here.
At least may I know whom I am addressing?
Certainly. I am lvan Dragomiloff. Oh, don't be put off by the name.
My father's Russian sentimentality has been counteracted by
- an English public school education. - Are you head of this organization?
- Certainly. - You look extremely young.
Oh, don't let that worry you. I was born and bred for the job.
- That's terrible. - It's not terrible.
My father brought me up to continue his life work.
It's natural for a son to inherit the family business.
Business? You're murderers.
Our proper title is the Assassination Bureau, Limited.
- Our dividends are quite substantial. - You admit you take life for money.
Money is life, don't you agree? The lack of it has killed more people
one way or another than 100 Assassination Bureaus.
Human life is possibly the most expendable commodity we possess.
It's so easily replaced, and so pleasurably.
This is fantastic. You're a monster.
No. My father only saw to it that I was educated in the logic of my profession.
- He was somewhat of a philosopher. - I'm not interested in him.
- May we get down to business? - Certainly. Please be seated.
Very well, then. What about your fees?
Oh, we have a sliding scale, according to the importance of the victim.
Quality is always worth paying for. We have very high overheads.
Since taking over, I have tried to completely modernize our methods.
This, after all, is the age of science.
Take, for instance, this little bomb.
We've just issued it to all our branches.
It can be timed to go off at any hour one chooses.
And its tick is no louder than a normal clock.
Switched off, it's as harmless as your pocket watch...
...unless you drop it, of course. Miss Winter, please don't be shy.
Confide in me as you would in a doctor or a priest.
Whom do you wish to kill?
You will undertake this assignment, Mr. Dragomiloff?
I shall want justification. Of what sins is he guilty?
- Avarice. - Oh, dear, dear.
And murder.
He seems a suitable candidate.
You guarantee that he will be killed?
You have my word.
The name, please.
Very well, then. His name is...
...lvan Dragomiloff.
I shall need further identification.
He is of Russian extraction, though educated in England.
Physical characteristics?
Approximately your size, weight and age.
I was born in the province of Valenko. Where was your man born?
In the province of Valenko.
I am compelled to believe that you mean me.
I do.
You puzzle me, Miss Winter.
We've never met, yet you want my life. Why? Why?
Because of my organization?
Because you believe "kill me, kill my bureau." Is that it? Is that it?!
What an absolutely marvelous idea.
It was not intended to amuse you.
But it does. It intrigues me too.
It will let me put my aging colleagues on their mettle. Wonderful.
Since you'll enjoy it, perhaps you'd give me a bargain price?
There's one matter upon which my board never compromise, on finance.
Without self-flattery, you'll never afford me.
Name your price.
Well, I'm not my father, of course,
but in all due honesty I couldn't put myself in at a penny less than...
...20,000 pounds.
- What a pity. - I accept.
- You do? - You will no doubt wish to count it.
But you will find each bundle contains a thousand pounds.
I trust your board will be quite satisfied.
- Good evening, gentlemen. - Good evening.
- Popescu, good job in Zagreb. - Thank you.
General von Pinck. Military life certainly keeps you fit, sir.
Lucoville, welcome to London. You too, my dear Weiss.
Cesare, you're putting on weight.
Food is the greatest pleasure in my life.
Greatest? They tell me your wife is the most beautiful woman in Venice.
She is also the best cook.
And now, gentlemen, to business, please.
It is fortunate that you're all in London for this meeting.
Something has come up which has... How shall I put it?
Crystallized thoughts I've had for some time past.
Look at the great deeds recorded on these walls, gentlemen,
each one performed in the course of bettering the world,
purging it of evil, striking down tyranny.
In those days, you were all ruled by my father's principle that our bureau
would never kill anyone without a sound moral reason for doing so.
He was a saintly man.
Do you still adhere to his principles?
Consider a moment. Be honest. Haven't we, in the pursuit of profit,
fallen short of the high morals upon which our bureau was founded?
It's always possible to find a good moral reason for killing anybody.
Everybody, from some point of view, deserves death.
Man is born to die.
No operation that consistently shows a profit
can do so without answering a legitimate demand.
You say that we are justified by the prosperity
our operations have brought us all.
You, Lucoville, with your string of hotels.
You, general, with your estates and castles.
You, Weiss, with your Swiss banking syndicates,
and you Spado, with your fake antiques. And you...
Oh, dear, we seem to have started our meeting without our vice chairman.
Does anybody know?
Lord Bostwick, my apologies. We started without you.
Forgive me. A fallen horse in Piccadilly caused a terrible congestion.
How the traffic will flow when it is all motorized.
Please, proceed, Mr. Chairman.
Thank you, my lord. I wish to put a commission before you.
It is an assignment I welcome and have accepted on your behalf.
To the commission of Miss Sonya Winter for 20,000 pounds,
the assassination of lvan Dragomiloff, your chairman.
Miss Winter has put into my hands the very weapon I need.
With all respect, I no longer see in you the idealism
without which we are no more than murderers.
Murderers! We are assassins!
I aim to put you to the test. I believe Miss Winter has shown us
the way to rekindle the torch we once held so high.
We won't stand for it.
It's really quite simple.
Under our constitution we have the right
to accept commissions on behalf of all. I have accepted this one.
But what does it mean?
It means, my friends, that you must kill me,
or I will kill you.
Kill us?
Yes, gentlemen, kill you.
Not to put too fine a point on it, I consider you all expendable.
Taking the honorable course, I challenge you to this duel.
Yes, but supposing, my dear young friend, that we succeed in killing you?
Then you, Lord Bostwick, whom I appoint as neutral referee
in this game, will, as vice chairman, take over my position,
pending the election of my successor.
I repeat, gentlemen. The commission has been accepted.
We must now settle a moment to begin this little adventure.
We must give you time to return home.
Some of your journeys will be longer than others.
Let us say that 24 hours from now we shall be considered at hazard.
Lord Bostwick, we'd better synchronize our watches.
Gentlemen, 24 hours from the striking of this gavel, we shall be at hazard.
From tomorrow then, at precisely 7:30 p.m.
Hardly the act of a gentleman.
But one should always applaud initiative.
Good night to you, gentlemen, and good luck.
We must go after him. This ridiculous nonsense must be stopped.
The motion has been accepted. Discipline must be observed.
Why should we accept it? We've given our lives for the Bureau.
- Not yet. - Gentlemen,
it's not a moneymaking proposition.
As acting chairman, I call you to order.
Gentlemen, we have all been very loyal to the memory of our dear founder,
but let us be honest with ourselves.
I think we have all felt that seniority should have counted for something
when the succession was decided.
He should not have come in at the top.
- His father trained the boy well. - Of course.
Please do not misunderstand me, gentlemen.
I'm merely suggesting that it is in everybody's interest
to go along with our young chairman's sporting proposition.
In fact, I feel it is my duty as referee to stimulate your enthusiasm.
In addition to Miss Winter's fee, I offer a prize of 10,000 pounds
to whichever member accomplishes her commission.
A very sporting gesture, my lord.
No, no, no, no.
Our young chairman deserves all the credit.
He conceived this great adventure. He is certainly a sportsman.
Isn't he handsome.
Good morning.
Shall we take a little walk in the park, Miss Winter?
Mr. Dragomiloff.
Oh, forgive the disguise. Thanks to you, I'm a marked man.
My bureau accepted your commission.
Well, really.
The Albert Memorial?
It was an agreed rendezvous.
It was glorious in the park this morning.
- Well, when are you leaving? - Leaving?
Miss Winter, have you forgotten so soon that you're a journalist?
- What more can I do? - Follow Dragomiloff.
Report on his execution.
It's the greatest story of the decade, and covered by a woman.
- Isn't that what you wanted? - Of course.
My secretary will take care of everything. Money, tickets...
But I suppose you don't know where he'll go.
Well, he did tell me quite a lot about the Bureau,
where it operates and everything.
- We walked by the Serpentine. - Miss Winter,
you do want to go on with the story?
I've invested a lot of money in it.
Oh, most certainly. I shall have the greatest pleasure in reporting his...
- Whatever happens to him. - Splendid.
Now, remember, you are to wire me personally about all his movements.
Now, to where shall we buy you a ticket?
To Paris.
It's disgraceful. It's a scandal.
Oh! It's an outrage. What has happened to my Paris?
It has become a sink of iniquity. A sewer. A den of vice.
- The tourists expect it, my dear. - Oh, nonsense!
The whole civilized world is shocked by it.
Nobody knows that better than you, Henri. Oh, yes, my dear.
You are one of the few senators of the republic
who have dared to stand out against evil.
I suppose it was my duty.
Oh, I respect you for it. Though sometimes I must confess,
- I fear for you. - Fear for me?
To oppose this underworld of vice may endanger your very life.
Well, it was your idea.
Somebody had to speak out. As I've always said,
if you want something done, do it yourself.
Well, my dear, I must be off to the senate.
We've a sitting that may go on most of the night.
The women of France will never forget what you're doing for them, Henri.
I hope not. Good night.
- Anything to report? - There's not a sign of him.
Everyone has been shown his photo.
Watch carefully. He's a devil.
- Good evening, Monsieur Lucoville. - Good evening.
- How is business? - Up a little on last week.
And how is the new cheap champagne going?
We serve it after midnight, same price, and nobody notices.
Excellent. You have been warned to look out for a certain man.
I have his picture here.
- He will not pass. - Excellent.
I am informed that one may find here
the most suitable arrangements for the night.
Monsieur le Comte de... Certainly, Your Excellency.
We shall arrange for you something special.
Good evening.
Just one moment.
My dear count, it's a pleasure to welcome you to our house.
- Well, madame, I am incognito. - But of course.
You will be one of our best-known unknown visitors. This way.
Phillippe, champagne in the Swan Room at once.
Absolutely hopeless. This one has knock-knees
and this one has the most frightful hangdog look about her.
And as for this one,
I seem to remember her at least five years ago in le Sphinx.
I demand something different, something fresh.
But Your Excellency has seen the most beautiful girls in the house!
Damn it! Damn it! I demand to see the director.
But he does not concern himself with the customers, Excellency.
He will concern himself with me, madame.
You tell Monsieur Lucoville to come here now!
And get these creatures out of here!
Of course, Excellency. Spank to your pleasure, Your Excellency, Your Honor.
Oh! Allez, vite!
Good evening. I was recommended to you by Lord Bostwick.
Lord Bostwick? Yes, he's a very old customer.
He knows we like to cater for the English taste.
Nothing I can do will please the gentleman.
Nothing you can do. I don't wonder. Let someone else try.
Surely this is a place of assignation?
It is certainly not a convent. Just stay here. I'll tell madame.
How very interesting.
I must make some notes.
The count wants something different.
- Excuse me. There is a new girl. - No, not now.
That's the most exciting creature in the place!
But she looks completely innocent.
Yes, exactly.
- I am the patron, mademoiselle. - How do you do?
Come this way, please.
I wonder if I might ask you one or two questions.
Don't worry, cherie, he doesn't want anyone experienced.
Your Excellency, it is an honor to meet you.
I have found you something entirely fresh.
What delightful surprises you have up your sleeve, patron.
In there. In there.
For the exceptional customer, there is always something...
How shall I say... special.
Special, yes. The room is to your satisfaction, Excellency?
They have sent you champagne. It's on the house, of course.
Oui, oui, oui, oui.
Where is that girl?
Where are you?
Tell me. Are all the rooms decorated in this fashion?
What are you doing, girl? The count doesn't want to be kept waiting.
Get your clothes off.
Dear, dear chairman, is this fair?
- I am unarmed. - Of course.
You see, you're slack as well as degenerate.
I really must apologize...
It's you.
Pierre. Gaston. In there.
What's a girl like you doing here?
- I thought it was a hotel. - Break down the door.
- Let's get out of the window. - You stay here.
You can't leave me in a place like this.
- Your bed, Miss Winter. You lie on it. - Shoot off the lock.
All right. Come on.
Let's cut through here.
No, perhaps not.
It's a raid. It's a raid. It's a raid.
My God, it's a raid! A raid, patron.
- Don't panic, gentlemen! - What's the meaning of this intrusion?
A madman has seized one of my girls against her will.
- Impossible. - Carry on, gentlemen!
The emergency will soon be over.
Jacques, champagne on the house for our guests!
Search the whole place!
Oh, Mallon, my dear fellow, how nice to see you. Au revoir.
We must go in somewhere.
I begin to suspect you're protecting my virtue.
I'm afraid it will have to look after itself.
You're too beautiful, cherie. I dare not look at you.
No! No! I can wait no longer!
Quick! The stairs.
No! Don't shoot the customers!
In there, patron.
Now we have him trapped. Shoot the lock.
It's no use, patron. He's bolted the door.
Very well. We'll smoke him out.
- You've got us into a pretty pickle. - I have?
- You're not here at my invitation. - Well, how do we get out?
All problems are capable of solution.
Keep your guns ready.
A laundry chute. I told you there's always a solution.
- It is exceedingly small. - Fortunately, I am not too fat,
and you are positively skinny.
- Skinny. - Come along.
We've got a little while. Get on the floor, please.
- I beg your pardon! - Gas.
It's lighter than air. It fills the room from the ceiling...
- It won't take long. - Long enough.
This commodious bag of yours
wouldn't by any chance contain such a thing as a first-aid kit, would it?
Do not arrest anyone wearing the Legion d'Honneur!
Surely you do not wish to harm that innocent young lady.
Come out and face the music.
When they burst the door open, they'll strike these matches alight.
The room will become a bomb.
- Now, Miss Winter, - Yes.
I thought I told you to keep close to the floor!
- Yes, I will... - Miss Winter?
Inspector, we have nothing to hide.
I assure you that this is a perfectly respectable hotel.
En avant!
Now, open the door, lvan.
We might even make a bargain.
If I was to become vice chairman...
He's drawing the bolts!
I knew you'd see reason, lvan.
I can't manage the lock.
It's the gas! The gas!
We'll have to break in.
Quick, quick! Break open the door!
No, no, no! Out of the way!
I always say, if you want something done, you've got to do it yourself.
Stand back! Champagne on the house!
Come on, you. No use hiding in here.
Been at the bottle?
Put her in the wagon with the others.
Let me go, please! Let me go!
I am a British citizen!
I demand to see the British ambassador!
- Good morning. - Good God.
May I come in? Thanks to those ridiculous policemen,
I nearly missed the train.
I thought I'd given you the slip.
Thank you, it was most considerate.
There was a first-class ticket to Zurich in the pocket.
An oversight.
Miss Winter, our rules do not allow our clients to supervise
the execution of their commissions.
Oh, I'm not doing that.
I'm just covering the story in the course of my profession.
Our records didn't show you were a journalist.
Well, this is my first assignment.
Which newspaper are you writing for?
For the Daily...
For the Daily Press, at large.
Women are not yet accepted in journalism.
But when I have this story, anyone will employ me.
It will strike a great blow for women.
Well, Miss Winter...
...if anybody is to write the story of this epic adventure,
- it is only right that it should be you. - Thank you.
And since you're to be my constant shadow, I suppose I'd better feed you.
Shall we adjourn to the dining car for luncheon?
But how can I accept your point of view?
To take life is the ultimate wrong.
- It's basic to all civilized ethics. - Really.
You accept the gallows, guillotine and the gas chamber.
And not to mention the field of battle.
- Brandy? - No, thank you. I never touch spirits.
Pity. Taken in moderation, it can greatly clarify the mind.
Thank you. My mind is perfectly clear on one topic concerning us:
All killing is wrong.
- And yet you commissioned mine. - That was quite different.
You don't go into a butcher to buy a steak
and question his morality in killing the cow.
Really, you're impossible. I shall return to my carriage.
- Shall I accompany you? - No, thank you.
I'm sure you are the one in need of the brandy.
- Cognac, monsieur? - Please.
Thank you.
- Excellent, an '88. - Anything further, sir?
- Just a cigar, thank you. - A cigar.
That'll be all, thank you.
Not quite all, lvan.
What a marvelous makeup.
You know, these new Leichner waxes are fantastic!
Thank you, lvan. And now there is much sadness in the world,
and there must be a little more.
Won't you at least permit me to finish my brandy and cigar?
The drink certainly, the cigar will take too long.
The kitchen staff won't stay locked in the galley forever.
While you were enjoying yourself in Paris, lvan,
I was preparing this operation.
You will admit it has the merit of surprise.
What's this?
"Popescu... Romanian businessman...
"...falls from Paris-Zurich express..." Et cetera...
"...burns on body"?
What did that young devil do to him?
The toast is absent friends.
Lucoville was a fool.
Any business with women is bad business.
But Popescu will be a great loss.
Does your agent report where our chairman is now?
Not yet. But she is a very able young woman,
and I'm sure that we shall hear something quite soon.
That idiot in Liechtenstein!
His talent lay in company fraud.
Certainly not in handling explosives.
Things are not going well, Muntzov.
I want this matter finished quickly.
Political tension is growing in Europe. The Bureau is the instrument I need.
Weiss understands the value of money.
I'm sure we can rely on Swiss efficiency in Zurich.
Suspect everyone!
Do you understand? Everyone.
The man is a master of disguises. Better to be safe than sorry.
- If we spot him, what do we do? - I told you.
Ring the bell to my office. But on no account
wink an eyelid even. Otherwise, you are a dead man.
Right. Go to your places, everyone!
Open the doors!
Is this where they keep the money?
Well, yes, mein Herr.
What? What did you require?
The mountains are full of thieves. Nothing is safe.
Bad luck, lvan! You don't fool me with this, my boy.
In Switzerland we are efficient, yes?
What are you doing? My box! Take care of my box!
The box.
Of course. The box.
- Throw it out into the street. - What?
Throw it out before it goes off.
The game is up, lvan.
Come back! Come back! My box! My savings!
Stop it, lvan.
The game is up.
Das geht zu weit.
I never know if I can trust you.
Dear, you know I might be recognized anywhere.
Simply hand it in for the attention of the director.
- That's all. - Very well.
- You're a villain. - I beg you...
Thief! Give me my money.
They told me you would look after my money.
What do you do? You throw it in the gutter!
I want my money! Give it to me!
Excuse me.
- Yes, mademoiselle. - I have something for the director.
What? What is it?
Well, she has something for the director.
Half-wit. Idiot!
My apologies, mademoiselle.
Take it, man. Put it in my office!
A terrible misunderstanding, mein Herr.
Get away!
What are you all standing here for? Get back to work!
All of you! Get back to work.
What exactly was in that case?
Purely technical details. They belong to our research department.
We have some very brilliant scientists working for us.
When they make a discovery, they deposit their secrets in a safe place.
I think they'll be pleased with the result.
There is no one in the army to match you, Herr General.
- Congratulations, Herr General. - Congratulate him.
It is not a disgrace to be beaten by the ex-champion of Germany.
You will bear the scars of your general's saber.
Carry them with honor, lieutenant.
What is the army coming to?
- Take him away and stitch him up! - A visitor, Herr General.
Lord Bostwick.
General, I'm glad you're keeping your hand in.
I'm just from Essen. Alfred Krupp sends his regards.
- Can we talk privately? - Leave us.
- You've heard the news from Zurich? - So much for the efficient Swiss.
Ja, ja. Always one must be alert. And to be alert, you must be fit.
En garde!
Absent friends.
For heaven's sake, stop it, Muntzov!
I've a good mind to send you back to Petrograd.
No, no, we don't want to risk any more of us.
Well, this fooling has got to stop.
What good is the Bureau with its best members gone?
The cream still remains.
Prove it, general, in Vienna.
Our young chairman is on his way there now.
- We have no one in Vienna. - Send someone.
It will be arranged.
To poor lvan.
Drunken idiot. Young Dragomiloff is worth ten of you.
What a tragedy that he lacks the vision to go along with me.
His whole romantic notion on moral killing is out-of-date.
If only he could realize that our organization
is the most lethal instrument of power ever conceived.
The Assassination Bureau is a political weapon or it is nothing.
Properly used, as I can use it,
it could bring down governments, dynasties and empires.
I could rule the destiny of Europe.
Great things are afoot.
Sell everything you possess, my friends, and buy shares in armaments.
Krupp, Skoda, Vickers-Armstrong. Take your pick.
Europe is already in ferment!
- Good morning, Miss Winter. - Good morning.
- You evidently sleep well in Vienna. - A luxury I appreciate.
Our bureau hasn't a branch here. A day off is a pleasant prospect.
Are you impressed with the emperor's forces? Thank you.
How ridiculous men are. All this dressing up and rattling of sabers.
Who's that barbarous gentleman taking the salute?
Prince Ferdinand of Ruthenia. He's Austria's Balkan puppet.
He's here in Vienna to be impressed by his master's military might.
When will we learn that force is meaningless?
Never. After all, you're paying to have me killed
because you believe that you are right and I am wrong.
It's nothing personal. It's just that...
Oh, my God!
Die, Ruthenian dogs, long live Carpathia!
Long live Carpathia!
Thank you, Miss Winter.
- I... I thought... - That the bullet was meant for me.
Sadly, I have no monopoly in the assassination business.
- Now, I insist you have a brandy. - No, thank you, I...
Your mind needs clarifying. You're paying to have me killed,
yet when you think I might be, you try to save me.
A revelation comparable with Saint Paul's at Tarsus.
Surely that calls for a celebration.
I'm quite out of breath.
- You're a very good dancer. - Of course.
My father liked me to excel... in everything.
Your father. You know something, I don't think you've really grown up.
- I was born old. - Well, maybe that's the trouble.
Now, while we're in Vienna, there's a certain Professor Freud...
Don't mention that name.
To meddle with my basic instincts would be professional suicide.
That's what I had in mind.
- I like it here. - Good.
You wait till you taste the Blutwurst. Where's that waiter got to?
Get me his apron. Put the bomb inside the sausage.
Quickly, man, and be careful. Mind the knife!
The slightest touch of metal will set it off.
Drink to the days The days going by
Some day we'll meet again
Remember me till then
While we're young While we're young
There are songs to be sung
And a pledge that's warm and gay
"I promise to Remember you
"The way you are today"
While we're young While we're young
There are songs to be sung
And a pledge that's warm and gay
The Archduke Ferdinand of Ruthenia has decided to visit this establishment.
It is an honor, Excellency.
His Highness wants some relaxation.
We were against it, after this morning's incident.
You must see that everything is in order.
Of course. This is a most respectable establishment.
I hope not. I told you, he wanted some relaxation.
Now, leave it to me and get out!
Lift up your glass on high
Drink to the days The days going by
Some day we'll meet again
Remember me till then
While we're young While we're young
There are songs to be sung
And a pledge that's warm and gay
"I promise to Remember you
"The way you are today"
While we're young While we're young
There are songs to be sung
And a pledge that's warm and gay
"I promise to Remember you
"The way you are today"
- The Blutwurst. - Here we are, mein Herr,
the riesen Blutwurst, the greatest delicacy in all Vienna.
The pigs for the Blutwurst are bred here in our Vienna woods.
They were slaughtered only this morning.
The blood must be quite fresh. Yes, yes.
In Vienna we have the best of everything.
Enjoy yourselves.
And drink it down, down Down, down, down
Down, down, down Down, down
Lift up your glass on high
Drink to the days The days gone by
Some day we'll meet again
Remember me till then
Lift up your glass on high
A sausage! But what did I say? This is indeed a place of fun!
Excellency, apologies. Allow me.
No, no, no. Put it on the table.
The Blutwurst is my favorite dish.
Bring me a knife.
- Come on! - But why? Why are we going?
You're acting completely like a lunatic! It was just warming up in there.
- That poor man. - Archduke Ferdie?
Waste no tears on him. A petty tyrant, if ever there was one.
An historic event. You should make an excellent journalist.
You're always on the spot.
- But that bomb was meant for you. - Precisely.
I thought you said the Bureau had no one here in Vienna.
They sent someone.
I wonder how they knew I was here.
Perhaps you've been followed.
- Indeed. I have, my dear. By you. - Me?
At Lord Bostwick's command, no doubt.
How did you know? He said not to say...
He also didn't tell you he's vice chairman of our bureau.
Lord Bostwick?
- I can't believe it. - A man of many parts.
- He's a villain. - Well, he'll hear no more from you.
On the contrary. I intend to keep him fully informed.
You what?
I want to know exactly why he wants control of the Bureau.
I shall wire him at once you're on your way to Venice.
Can't you make any more of it than this?
- There's nothing but facts! - We mustn't inflame the situation.
Ruthenia and Carpathia are puppets! Russia and Austria pull the strings.
So punch in some big headlines:
"Russia Warns Austria"! "Austria Warns Russia"!
"The Kaiser Summons his General Staff"!
You have private sources of information?
Of course. So get on with it, man.
We're running a newspaper. Give them news!
This is a stroke of luck, Muntzov.
Ferdinand's death is the spark I needed. Cheer up.
To a Russian, death is a serious matter.
- Life is no joke, either. - But time is running out.
I've got my new members picked.
But I need the Bureau in my hands now.
We must make sure once and for all in Venice.
Thank heaven for Cesare Spado. He has all the skill of the Borgias.
All my friends in London tell me I'm getting a little fat.
I can't resist.
My dearest one! You haven't put vanilla in the zabaglione!
You know how I dislike it!
Nonsense, Cesare. Just peel of tangerine.
I prepared it myself. There's not a drop of vanilla in it.
I can taste it distinctly.
There is positively no vanilla in the zabaglione.
Taste it again.
Perhaps you're right.
Eat it up now or I shall be very offended.
I will not speak to you.
Or let you...
No, no, no. Eleanora, my angel...
It's delicious.
I tell everyone your cooking is supreme.
The taste has quite disappeared.
You've outdone yourself, my darling.
Eleanora, my dear, it's just possible that a man
with whom I have business connections may call here.
- I would prefer not to see him. - As you wish.
His name is Dragomiloff, but he may not declare himself.
I would like you to describe carefully anyone who may call.
What a dreadful fuss.
This is our finest view,
the room Signor Dragomiloff always prefers, signora.
You will see the sun rise up behind the Santa Maria della Salute.
- A sight never to be forgotten. - A little misunderstanding.
I am not a signora and therefore require a separate room.
Scusi, signorina. What a pity.
I hope you have another equally delightful room.
The room, yes, signor. The view, no.
- I have only a room at the back. - Then she must have this room.
- Oh, no. - No, I insist.
Take my luggage to whatever room. I'll see you later.
It is a very delightful room, signor. You will be most comfortable.
I'm sure I will. Thank you very much indeed.
Well, it seems we have a married look.
Because you're after my blood, no doubt.
Don't talk nonsense. We've got no time to waste.
- What are you doing? - Can't be too careful.
My dear friend Spado might have left me a welcoming present.
That's all clear. Bombs aren't the Italian line.
They prefer more subtle methods.
Well, the sooner you talk to him the better. Isn't it time you left?
Miss Winter.
Since our relationship became less formal,
I observe a tendency on your part to nag.
- Sometimes you can be very irritating. - I have been told that.
Stay here until I return, understand? Absolutely no one is allowed in.
If you sleep, lock the windows. The balcony's an easy climb.
To be on the safe side, I will lock you in and keep the key.
But this is absurd. If Spado is so dangerous,
how can you hope to win him over to our plan?
Cesare and my father were very close.
I doubt he'd go the way of the others
had it not been for such a demanding wife.
- As usual, the woman gets the blame. - Not without good cause, I gather.
I'm told that Signora Spado has considerable charms
and doesn't hesitate to use them.
She hasn't your high principles.
Your self-denial is really quite remarkable.
A woman's beauty can be a lethal weapon.
- My God. - My darling, what can it be?
Is it something you have eaten?
It's working.
The poison, it's doing its work.
What are you saying, Cesare?
How could he have managed it?
He? Who are you talking of, my darling?
The son of my old friend and comrade.
I had arranged his death, but he has got me first.
- Cesare, you're delirious. - There is so much I must tell you.
Lie still. Angelo has gone for a doctor.
You must hear it all.
This business I am in with this man Dragomiloff,
it is called...
...the Assassination Bureau.
This Englishman lord will pay 10,000 pounds
for this man Dragomiloff's death?
Pieces of silver. Pieces of silver.
Many pieces.
Can you forgive me?
It was for you that I did these dreadful things.
But you are so tender, so innocent.
What can you know of assassination?
Life flows along
Just like a boat on a river
All that I want is to
Find a place
Safe in the harbor
Of love's embrace
Good evening.
- Forgive my entering unannounced. - Who are you?
- A friend of your husband. - My husband is away.
He knew I was coming.
We had some business to do together.
You... You haven't told me your name.
My name is...
...lvan Dragomiloff.
Signor Dragomiloff.
I've heard him talk so often about you.
I feel we are old friends.
Me too.
I have heard much about you. Cesare is a... A lucky man.
May I ask you where he has gone?
I don't know.
He's just, well, floating around.
Since you are alone, my presence might compromise you.
- Perhaps I should go. - No, no. We'll have a glass of wine.
- Do sit down. - Thank you.
How much do you know about his business?
Oh, nothing.
Well, then, you'll hardly be able to make up for his absence, will you?
I wouldn't say that.
Will you think me very wicked
if I confess to being pleased that Cesare is away?
I would think you very flattering.
But that's not the reason why you made away with him.
I what?!
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you.
How dare you accuse me of such a thing!
Let's not have melodramatics.
I saw your handsome gondolier dispose of the body.
Now please sit down.
Perhaps we can come to some arrangement.
One moment. Angelo, I must deal with him.
- You have a man in. - Not for long.
- Long, short, what is the difference? - Don't be a fool.
He knows. He saw you. He could destroy us.
- Then I will fix him. - I will.
My way.
Go and prepare the gondola, then wait.
I will ring when it is done. It will be quick this time.
You can't prove your ridiculous accusation.
I hope I won't have to.
We have plenty of time to talk it over.
Then let's have another glass of wine.
Please, close the window. The night has grown chilly.
Even if what you say was true,
wouldn't I have been merely doing your job for you?
You said you knew nothing of your husband's business.
Perhaps it is now my business.
I'm sure that you'll handle it very capably.
Thank you.
Please draw the curtains.
It appears we understand each other well.
- Sit down, please. - Thank you.
I told you I could take my husband's place.
What a delightful little table, like a wheel of fortune.
Our fortunes, it seems,
are to be linked.
- Shall we drink to that? - I...
- I can't drink to the unknown. - You're not adventurous.
I drink to it.
Get rid of him.
What a pity.
He was so young.
All that I want is to
Find a place
Safe in the harbor
Of love's embrace
How sweet...
Fortunately, I kept wicket for Eton.
- Oh, don't worry, I've turned it off. - It...
It was on the canopy.
Splendid. I knew these new time bombs would come in useful.
Can't you talk anything but shop? I've nearly been killed.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I am sorry.
I'll never forgive myself.
This room was meant for me. I should never have left you here.
What on earth are you doing in that ridiculous costume?
I forgot.
I regret to have to inform you that lvan Dragomiloff is now dead.
- What? - Yes, events took an unexpected turn.
However, the first part of our plot has been achieved.
- You mean they think you're dead? - Precisely.
I shall now have to disappear into hiding.
And the rest, Miss Winter, is up to you.
Now, that's what I call a really pretty dress.
Miss Winter.
Miss Winter, surrender.
Why not?
Surrender is no defeat...
...for a woman.
My friend has not returned to the hotel. He's been out all night.
I'm desperately afraid he was run over.
- In Venice, signorina? - Well, fallen in a canal, anything.
- Please, you must help me. - Of course, signorina.
- The name of your friend? - Dragomiloff.
Ivan Dragomiloff.
One moment, signorina.
Signorina, I am sorry.
- I fear I have very bad news. - What?
- What is it? - Your friend.
There must have been an accident. He has been drowned.
His body has been taken from the canal.
- I'll be all right. - There were papers with his name.
But we would like you to identify the body, if you are able.
- Very well. - Please come this way, signorina.
It is...
This way, signorina.
It... It... It is him.
- Yes, we found papers on the body. - Was Dragomiloff a good friend?
He was the best friend my husband had.
We were very close.
We will save you any more pain, signora.
I would be very glad if he could be brought to my palazzo.
It is not fitting that such a man should lie here.
Whatever the signora desires.
We salvaged the gondola, signora.
But alas, there is as yet no sign of the gondolier.
Poor Angelo.
Poor Angelo's clothes fit you perfectly.
A little tight, perhaps, because you are more muscular.
I prefer that.
Go to the undertakers.
I want this gruesome thing removed
as soon as my guests have paid their respects.
Well, come along, Piero. Get on with it.
I hope you're not going to take liberties.
Miss Winter?
Miss Winter, I hardly recognized you.
- My congratulations. - Lord Bostwick.
I came as soon as I received your telegram announcing his death.
May I introduce an associate of mine, Baron Muntzov.
Well, my dear young lady,
the press has once again shown itself to be the conscience of the nation.
Your story will be syndicated all over the world.
Come, we will go directly to Spado's house,
and pay our respects to the dead.
At Spado's house?
But his body is at the morgue.
As I so often find, my information is more up-to-date than my reporters'.
Signora Spado's had the coffin taken to her palazzo.
My lord. My lord.
I've just arrived from Berlin, the news is grave.
Dragomiloff has gone just in time.
Miss Winter, may I introduce General von Pinck.
Collect the luggage and bring Miss Winter.
The general and I will go on ahead. We have important matters to discuss.
There's mobilization. I must return tonight.
Will there be war?
Not yet, the kaiser's proposing a secret peace conference.
- Indeed. - He goes to Ruthenia for the funeral,
and that's where the conference will take place.
They will all be there: The English king. Tsar Nicholas.
The president of France. The Austrian emperor. The...
Spare me this catalog of mediocrity.
All this may suit me very well.
Signora Spado, my greetings and congratulations.
My colleague, General von Pinck.
My husband is away. I had to act on his behalf.
It's hard to believe a beautiful lady succeeds where many men failed.
We should invite you onto the board.
Thank you, Lord Bostwick. But I don't think it is suitable
for an Italian lady to practice murder professionally.
I will be content with the reward you have so kindly offered.
And you shall have it, dear lady.
So there he lies.
Poor lvan.
He was too young to see the potentialities of his inheritance.
Requiescat in pace.
Ivan killed by a woman, that's droll.
I believe Spado's house is quite beautiful.
As with so many things, first impressions are the worst.
This way, signorina.
And so you see, my dear signora,
this young lady has served her purpose and must be disposed of.
Miss Winter, Muntzov has been monopolizing you.
Signora Spado, this is Miss Winter,
whose commission you executed on behalf of your husband.
If you'll excuse me, I'll make a room ready for the discussion.
No, no, no. This will do splendidly.
The presence of our ex-chairman will be a spur to our deliberations.
You openly admit you are a member of the Bureau?
A member?
Thanks to you and Signora Spado, I am now the chairman.
What a journalist you would have made.
In at the death of the old Bureau and the birth of the new.
Unfortunately, you must also be its first victim.
Dispose of her, Muntzov. It's time you did something useful.
This way.
Take her below. There are steps to the canal.
Don't make any false moves. I'm a dangerous man.
Go to that wall, please, Miss Winter.
If you would please face the wall, my dear.
We Slavs are so temperamental.
Somehow, I don't feel like it at all today.
So you're a coward as well as a murderer.
I don't seem really to care for killing people anymore.
Keep quite still, Miss Winter.
It's best to make a clean job of it.
What on earth?
- I'm in mourning. - For your lost principles, I presume?
You look like you're got up to seduce an archbishop.
- Don't you like it? - Oh, I'm turning in my grave.
Will you at least get rid of that preposterous hat.
- How dare you! - That's better.
At any rate, you played your part admirably.
See what results the report of my death produced.
- It nearly produced mine. - It's brought them here,
as I knew it would.
Now we see whether I can learn more dead than alive.
But the coffin in the room upstairs, who's in it?
The man you identified as me, of course, her gondolier.
- Muntzov! - Come on.
Muntzov, where are you?
- Where could that idiot go? - He'd be here.
The secret stairs from my apartments lead down to that landing.
A girl, even Muntzov couldn't fail.
He evidently did.
And the girl's hat.
- If he killed her, then... - Then who killed him?
- I want to see inside that coffin. - Oh, no.
- And why not, signora? - You're not squeamish, surely?
Take off the lid.
- Please, don't disturb the dead. - Be silent.
Replace the lid.
My apologies, signora. You've done your job well.
Don't worry, signora. He can't get away.
General, I will return to Germany. Where will your headquarters be?
At my hunting lodge at Rothenburg.
The peace conference will take place across the frontier in the Castle Minsk.
Convenient. I'll summon the Bureau members to meet us at Rothenburg.
- But my staff will be there, officers. - Of course, and they'll be very useful.
So goodbye, lvan.
You're going to miss our greatest assignment of all.
At my commission, the assassination of Europe.
They have come to take him away.
Make sure the screws are tight.
We'll have a glass of wine, and then we can complete our business.
Of course, the reward.
I suppose it was rather tactless of Cesare
to tell me so much about your secret business.
Who can quarrel with such an excellent result?
Surely it is worth more than a mere 10,000 pounds?
Of course. How much would you suggest?
Naturally, you would not like your affairs made public.
Shall we say 100,000?
Oh, alas, signora, we are not a rich organization.
But you have such great plans now that I have given you control.
Surely that is worth special consideration?
Von Pinck, see that signora gets the most special consideration we offer.
Well done, Miss Winter. On the spot as usual.
As Europe's heads of state travel to Ruthenia for the funeral of its ruler,
the Archduke Ferdinand's tragic death threatens to set Europe ablaze.
Throughout Germany and the Austro-Hungarian Empire,
troops of the Grand Alliance are moving toward the Ruthenian frontier.
In Russia, Tsar Nicholas assumes personal command of his forces,
as his Balkan allies call impatiently for action.
In the Republic of France, military preparations are already afoot.
Great Britain puts her armed forces in a state of instant readiness.
After the funeral, the heads of state will proceed to the royal castle at Minsk.
Here, close to the Ruthenian border with Germany.
Just across the valley at Rothenburg is a German army...
...commanded by General von Pinck.
- What do you make of it? - The kaiser is at the conference.
- What can the German army do? - Nothing.
But what Lord Bostwick does with the remains of my bureau is the question.
Mein Gott!
You might look all right around the board table, my friends,
but thank God I don't have to take you into battle.
That goes under the jacket, man.
The Russian anthem.
The czar is arriving.
We shall need an anthem of our own.
Remind me.
The czar.
The others will soon be here.
The time has come to make a move, gentlemen.
Are your officers safely under lock and key?
Quite safe and very angry in their underwear.
I've sent a limber ahead with our little toy.
My engineers will have it loaded by the time we arrive.
There it is, the castle at Minsk.
All the crowned heads of Europe under one roof, what an opportunity.
Now, lvan.
For his lordship, I mean, if war is what he wants.
With your ideas, I'm surprised you're shocked at war.
Not at all. It's a matter of business. How can we charge our prices
with everybody happily killing each other for a shilling a day?
Look out.
- What is it? - A bomb.
It's so big. What will they do?
- Drop it. - What?
On the castle. Ride there quickly. It must be evacuated.
- But the frontier will be guarded. - Ride, I say. I must follow that bomb.
French president.
Vorsicht, vorsicht.
Corporal? Corporal!
What are you doing? What is that thing?
Some new sort of bomb. We are to load it.
Aboard my zeppelin? What's the devil next?
- General's orders, sir. - This is a naval ship.
We'll soon see about that.
Come on, come on, get busy, there.
Los, get this thing unloaded.
The general gave me the order himself. Los!
What the devil are you talking about? Bombs in zeppelins, ridiculous.
Weg mit dem Objekt. Es muss heute nicht getan werden.
Get up.
A life on the ocean wave and here we are in the middle of a forest
- with a bloody gas bag. - You men there,
what are you doing? Do up your buttons.
Where is your officer?
- Your officer, where is he? - He was here a moment ago.
Well, he is not here now. I shall take over command.
General's orders. The zeppelin takes off
and returns to base immediately. Get that thing away from there.
Corporal, do you hear me? Get that thing away from here!
Jawohl, Herr Kapitan.
Bloody officers.
- Who is the pilot? - The Herr Kapitan, Herr Kapitan.
- But he is not here. - Well, I also am a pilot, Herr Kapitan.
Then why didn't you say so? Get on with it, man.
Get that thing down here.
Careful, careful.
- Hey, you. Where's the officer? - Well, there was one here.
- Where is he now? - I don't know, Herr General.
- We've lost one already. - Don't answer back.
Prepare to take off immediately.
What are you doing there, corporal?
- Get that thing aboard. - Jawohl, Herr General.
- Where are you going? - I must go to the castle.
You have, have you? The frontier is closed. No one is allowed through.
The castle must be evacuated. They're gonna bomb it.
Do you think we're idiots in Ruthenia? Evacuate! They've only just arrived.
They are going to drop a bomb, I tell you.
Oh, drop it? Who is going to? An eagle?
Through you go.
There are no frontiers for the Sisters of Mercy.
Will you please listen to me?
Get out of here, before I have you arrested.
Heave ho.
Heave ho.
Steady. Good.
- Up. Up. - Careful.
Up. Up.
The bomb is secured.
Stand by to cast off.
Release ballast.
Cast off of it.
Cast off now.
- Set course for Minsk. - Minsk, Herr General?
Drive and ask no questions.
Bombs from the air. What a marvelous idea.
All those little houses down there, just pull a lever and poof! They're gone.
My God, let's go and see.
Revolutionary idea, general, an aerial bomb.
History in the making. A frightening concept.
In 15 minutes, we should be over the castle.
What's that fool up to?
- What the devil are you doing there? - There's a naval officer onboard.
Get it back on course.
The captain. He must have hidden on board.
- Well, why didn't you search? - He'll give no more trouble.
- We're back on course. - Not too soon.
We're approaching the frontier.
Look! Look!
So, what is this?
It is un ballon.
By Jove! It looks like some sort of airship.
Nothing is supposed to cross the frontier.
It's one of those damned zeppelins. Where's that Hun?
- Good morning. - There you are, Herr Oberleutnant.
General von Pinck has sent word.
- It's a patrol for security purposes. - Why was I not informed?
- Prussians do what they like. - They're invading our frontier.
Now, then. Now, then. Steady the butts.
This is supposed to be a peace conference.
- Starboard two points. - Gentlemen.
- It's impossible. - Nothing's impossible, general.
- This time we'll make quite sure. - Unwise, my lord.
You see, a bullet through a hydrogen balloon will blow us all out of the sky.
It's true, my lord. Leave him to me.
He will not stand a chance.
I was the saber champion of all Germany.
En garde.
Now, here! And here!
Come on.
Very good.
Take this.
Here, here, here.
- Get him. - This way. After him.
Keep her steady.
Don't do it, Charles. Indiscriminate destruction will engulf you too.
One death or a million, where's the difference?
We're surgeons, not butchers. We only kill to destroy evil.
- Hypocrite. You kill for money. - Only those who deserve to die.
- We must judge before we kill. - Judge? Young fool.
You're not an assassin, you're a critic.
It's jammed.
Damn you, get out of my way.
Rise, Sir lvan.
Your Majesties, you must evacuate the castle immediately.
Miss Winter, not quite on the spot for once.
- Ivan, what happened? - Sir lvan, if you please.
Virtue has been rewarded.
Well, really.