Pop Star's Single, 'Booty Wave', Most Likely Civilization's Downfall


Uploaded by TheOnion on 19.12.2011

Transcript:
And if you thought things couldn't get more infantile
and aesthetically insulting than Fergie, Kesha or Katie Perry,
then you obviously haven't met 22 year old K'ronikka,
the latest and most horrid talent-bereft pop monstrosity
the music industry has ever sadistically forced
down the American's public collective throat.
She is here with us in the studio right now.
What, what? -Welcome K'ronikka.
God, you're just the worst. -Now tell us K'ronikka,
how did you first decide that you wanted to be the cipher
through which the cynicism of a morally-bankrupt industry
is channeled? -Yo, I just do what I do,
you know what I'm saying?
It's like, people just love my 'ish'.
Right. Now, your latest single, "Booty Wave",
and I honestly can't believe I just had to say those two words,
is currently number one in the nation
despite the fact that Rolling Stone Magazine
called you "definite proof that mankind is inherently evil."
That's right. Y'all just got to booty and wave,
booty and wave. -Please stop. -Booty and wave.
Booty, booty, booty, booty. -It's moments like this
when the end of civilization seems most imminent.
Yeah! -I think I might be sick.
And just to be clear... -'Cuz that shit is the joint
and check my latest track: "I'm Going to Slam Your D"
featuring Pitbull. -Now K'ronikka,
according to my notes here you are in the middle
of your sold out Damn Gurl tour.
Damn Gurl, that's right.
Which is a heinous slap in the face to the English language
and will also travel to 47 cities
sapping the intellects of every young person along the way.
I said Damn Gurrrl. That's right, uh!
There's no light in your eyes K'ronikka.
I got nothing to say to the haters.
I hate you. -And right now
our avarice-soaked, unscrupulous corporate advertisers
require that we play a little bit of the "Booty Wave" video.
Hell yeah, watch me kick it for y'all.
♪ Booty wave, it's like a booty tsunami. ♪
♪ Now get down on your knees and call me your mommy. ♪
♪ Don't misbehave, 'cuz I know you want me. ♪
♪ Surf's up on this booty, hang ten big pop. ♪
♪ You want to ride this, you can't deny this, ♪
♪ come get inside this, come on. ♪
♪ You want to ride this, you can't deny this, ♪
♪ come get inside this. ♪
♪ Booty wave, booty, booty ♪
♪ Booty wave, booty, booty ♪
♪ Booty wave, booty, booty ♪
♪ Booty wave, booty, booty, booty♪
♪ Booty wave ♪