Blood Light - Ep 9 - Episode Nine (Part 1)


Uploaded by Bloodlightseries on 24.05.2011

Transcript:
SFX - Moaning
SFX - Creepy moaning
SFX - Creepy sex moaning
SFX - Knock, Knock, Knock
She's here.
Shut up, shut up, she's here.
Alexis. Come in.
Oh, what happened to your leg?
It's nothing.
Do you know why your here?
I have no idea.
It has come to my attention that despite our
meetings, the vampire retreat, and Cooper's steadfast support system
you have had another anger episode.
By my record
this makes this your ninth episode Alexis.
What are you talking about?
Don't denying it Alexis. Earlier today I received a very disappointing email
from a close friend of yours.
An email from who?
From whom the email was sent is not important.
He chose to...
or she...
chose remain anonymous
Who's Rannark?
Connor, that asshole!
Hey! No A-double-snake-holling in my office!
Whether or not it was Connor who sent this,
he or she
cares enough to let me know what's going on.
Dear attractive group leader.
I must first commend you on your amazing work with my dear friend Alexis.
But in the same breath and a heavy heart must inform you that she has once again
fallen off the wagon.
Music - Carl Orff's O' Fortuna
SFX - Connor laughing, manically
The story begins two nights ago.
My colleague and I had just returned home from Temple with two fellow parishioners.
I don't want this to go too late because I want to be home before the Sabbath.
Don't worry Ethan, these are ladies and if there's one thing we should always do we should respect ladies
We'll be gone well before six o'clock.
Excellent, because these are the mothers of our children if we're lucky.
No touch high five?
You gotta be fucking kidding me.
We were quietly occupying ourselves with a game of Kosherland.
When Alexis stormed in.
She had clearly been drinking blood.
virgin
baby
blood!
HEY!
Good evening Alexis.
What are you bitches doing?
We are enjoying a wonderful evening with our guests.
Well I'll make sure it's a smashing good time!
SFX - Alex Screams SFX - Table cracks in half
SFX - Alex laughs evilly
What followed was an episode unlike any we've seen before.
The only was for you to truly understand
would be to witnesses it yourself in a
flashback montage sequence.
She destroyed the apartment and attacked
our guests. All while dressed as Slave Princess Leia.
Wait...what?!?
Don't interrupt.
I tried to remind her of her treatment
Alexis remember you anger management exercises
that the brilliant and
good looking Philip Worthington taught you.
HA! Philip is a hack, his exercises cannot work on me Connor.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, all I say is fuck.
Now I will kill you all!
As she launched into a berserker rage I had no choice but to defend my guests.
She was so powerful, minus the facial hair she was more werewolf than vampire.
SFX - Alex's deep heavy breathing
SFX - Alex screams!
Thankfully I survived to write you this letter.
We now not only fear for Alexis,
but also for our safety and our lives.
Please use all your skills and good looks
to save our wayward friend Alexis.
Signed Connor...ahhh...Con...er...ummm...ahh..konn
Concer...concerned...a concerned friend.
I don't fucking believe this.
Frankly Alexis neither do I.
Look at this face!
This is the face of a broken heart.
This is the broken-hearted face. And it's not broken hearted for me,
It's broken hearted for you.
And it's broken hearted for this man who has performed his duties as a vampire sponsor with great aplomb.
Have we really made no progress with you?
We were supposed to be a
Super Team!
Aww, fuck me.
Super team,
Abolished.
And frankly Alexis after this email I'm not sure..
That email from Connor..
Or she!
His name is on the email!
Her...she...err..ahh...coffee.
Whatever.
She is trying to fuck me over.
No, Alexis, it was a concerned friend.
Do you know what kind of
person has the
ability to write something like this?
A saint.
A saint?
If anything he's the goddamn devil. He's a sociopath.
He is neither the devil or a sociopath. Everyone knows there's no such thing as a sociopath.
Then why would he be doing this?
That's a good question Alexis.
You constantly blame Connor for all of your problems,
but you've never given me a reason why.
Well maybe if you would listen to what actually happened that night then you would understand.
Yes. Please tell me what really happened.
Well, it did happen to two nights ago that much is true.
I was at home getting ready for bed when
Connor and my idiot roommate came bursting in after a long night of doing
whatever the fuck they do.
SFX - Connor and random girls laughing.
Ohhh shit!
Alright ladies, this is Alex, she is unimportant.
This is the ladies. We've got Ashley, yeah. And we've got...Sarah? Wait, is it Sarah?
Yes, it's...
I don't give a shit.
You don't give a shit or you're a dick?
Ohhh neither.
Where's your bathroom?
It's um...down the hall to the right.
I'll come too.
Yes you will.
Sooo...Sarah's kind of a bitch.
Well good thing you have no standards.
Hilarious. But the good this is that Sarah is Ethan's girl tonight.
What? What does that mean?
It means you're not getting any tonight.
Look, Sarah's and ice queen and you're going to need a chisle a lot larger than yours to crack it.
So, all I need you to do tonight is run defense while I...take it to the Ash-hole.
Ahhh sports metaphors.
Keep your answers short.
Compliment her looks.
And just avoid any of your stupid conversation topics.
What is that supposed to mean?
Nobody gives a shit about your stupid Lost conspiracy theories anymore Ethan, least of all hot girls.
You're telling me that you don't find it the least bit suspicious that the pallet drops kept coming
years after the Darma Initiative stopped being a viable presences on the Island.
This is exactly what I'm talking about Ethan. The show is over! Move on!
Elizabeth Mitchell is now on V, it's the exact same show.
No! No! No! None of it! None of it! None of it! It's the same show, it's the same show!
Ladies.
Miscellaneous smooth line.
Wait...what?
I don't know, I can remember every stupid and he says.
Alright, please continue.
And meanwhile Ethan's trying to get with this Sarah chick.
I've existed for two hundred years,
and I have no idea how you do it.
You're beauty is just so effortless.
I mean be honest,
with a body like this I bet you don't even go to the gym, do you?
No, just born perfect.
So.
You're a vamPIRE, like Connor.
Yup.
Really?
Yup.
Bad ass.
Compliment her looks.
YOU KNOW!
You have a real effortless beauty.
Uh...thank you.
No, I mean it. Like
in today's society that that so much emphasis on
looking like celebrities or super models it's...it's refreshing to see a woman who
doesn't wear that much makeup or
or, doesn't neccassarily dress in the nicest clothes,
or doesn't go to the gym that often, clearly, it's kinda refreshing.
Ha, ha, ha, ha...idiot.
Music - More Crazy J Pop
This continue for some time Connor fooling around with Ashley, and Ethan drowning in his own akwardness.
Touch it. Touch it. Touch it.
Come on! Come on!
You saved him, you saved him. You're amazing.
So I went ahead and went to bed because I had to be up early for a spin class.
Alright, fuck it, I'm going to bed.
Fierce. Inapproperate.
No, no.
Inappropriate. Go on.
Ok, then, a couple hours later Connor came into my bedroom.