DailyGrace LIVE - 9/4/12 (Full Ep)


Uploaded by MyDamnChannel on 04.09.2012

Transcript:

DAILY GRACE: Where's you come from?
Get out of here.
Don't.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
DAILY GRACE: Hi crazies.
No offense if you're actually crazy.
I didn't mean it.
Please do not come to my house and throw fish at my windows.
Been there.
Not fun.
Daily Grace here for My Damn Channel Live.
Yay!
Did you guys miss Beth and my's end of summer super
special party last week?
If you did, here's a clip.
[MUSIC - PSY, "GANGNAM STYLE"]
BETH HOYT: Yes.
DAILY GRACE: That was really magical.
What's even more magical is apparently I
only own one cardigan.
And I wear it all the time.
How fun for you to see that.
Well, here is my favorite comment from that show.
Let's check it out.
It says, it's from HungryMuffinProd.
Marry.
[BELL].
Kill.
Oprah, Doctor Phil, Ellen.
Go.
OK.
OK.
I would have to, well I have to eff Ellen because she's
probably real good at it.
Her wife is Portia de Rossi.
That girl's beautiful.
And I'm sure they're together for lots of other reasons but
the sex is probably great.
And she's funny.
And I want to wear like 90% of her clothing.
So that would work out.
I'd Marry Oprah because of the stability and the complete
lack of sexual chemistry.
She'd just give me money and then leave me
alone, Stedman style.
And I'd have to kill Doctor Phil.
Isn't that obvious?
Wow, this is a great way to start off the show.
Guys today's the day after Labor Day, the holiday where
we all sit outside and get drunk and not really sure why
we have the day off, but no one questions it.
It's also the day that we put all of our white clothes into
teeny, tiny nine month coffins and bury them in our
metaphorical yards until next spring.
This holiday gets better and better.
It also marks the time of year that we head back to school.
Wheee!
And wahwah.
So today I thought I would answer your questions and
concerns about heading back to school.
You guys asked me a lot of questions using the hashtag
MyDamnChannelLive on Twitter.
So let's take a Twitter question, shall we?
Who is this from?
LOLuis.
Luis.
OK.
What was your favorite after school snack?
Um.
Well actually, I think I might have said this on here before.
My lunch every day in high school was a rainbow chocolate
chip cookie, like with rainbow M&Ms, and Funyuns.
Every single day I would eat that because we had a snack
shack in our cafeteria.
And my friend Rachel and I used to go there every day,
get a rainbow cookie and Funyuns and eat it.
We were the picture of health.
If Michelle Obama could have seen us back then, she would
have loathed every second of it.
But look at me now.
I'm going strong.
I can run for like a block.
So really it helped me out in the long run.
Let's take another Twitter question.
This is from IBeliebindawson.
Wow, a lot of things in that name.
What's your earliest school memory?
Hmmm.
My earliest memory is preschool.
I remember in preschool they used to try and teach us
things by uh giving us-- well we would go out once a day to
the playground and expend our energy out there.
But to go out to the playground, we all had to hold
hands with someone.
And to figure out who your partner was for going out to
the playground, they'd give us all cards that had
opposites on it.
So we had to find our opposite.
Like if you had day, you to find the kid that had night.
If you had yes, you'd have to find the kid that had no.
If you had go, you had to find the kid that said stop.
And I remember I think I had day, and Ryan, this
kid Ryan, had night.
And oh, I had a crush on Ryan.
And oh my God, that was like the longest holding hands
moment of my life.
I remember holding hands, I must have been four years old.
And I remember being like, ahhh, ahhh.
That is really, really probably too early to
experience any sort of romantic feelings for the
opposite sex.
But then we got to the playground and he saw the
swings, and he ran to the swings and forgot about me for
a really long time.
So if I see those swings again, in my life, I'm going
to give them a talking to.
A strict and severe talking to.
Ryan, where you now?
What are you doing now?
Facebook me.
You know who you are.
Sort of.
Let's take a comment.
This is from That2ndGirlLily.
Grace, please help me with my chemistry homework?
You got it.
Um, what's chemistry about?
I was in AP chemistry in high school.
How did that happen?
I have no idea.
I, I don't know.
But here, this should help.

OK.
Write this down.
Good.
Now you win at chemistry.
Chemistry is all equations.
Chemistry is just another way for them to
teach you math in school.
Nothing cool happens in chemistry.
You know where all the fun happens?
Physics.
I remember everyone in physics was building bridges and doing
cool stuff like that, and I was sitting there doing math
equations in a period that wasn't my math class.
[SIGH]
God.
That felt good to get out.
Thank you for venting with me for a second.
Let's take another comment, shall we?
This is from chingie0326.
It's 4:00AM over here in Hong Kong, waited for the first
time to actually watch LIVE for once!
For you Grace!
This better be good!
Oh my God, there's so much pressure.
You should be asleep.
Your sleep patterns are going to be off for the rest of the
week and you're not going to be able to function to the
best of your ability.
And you're going to be like, why?
Why is everything so off?
Aw, because of Grace.
I hate Grace.
So I'm sorry to do this to you.
Go to sleep.
You made the comment on, you did it.
everything is succeeding for you, now go to sleep.
4:00AM in Hong Kong?
Go to bed.
Let's take a Twitter question.
This is from TheSkyIsSmiling.
What did you dread the most about going back to school?
Everything.
What did I dread the--
I dreaded waking up early.
I hate waking up early.
I'm, I'm not a morning person.
Are you guys morning people?
I, I remember not being able to function until like 10-- at
least 10 o'clock.
But also I remember in my high school we'd all have um,
there's different shifts for your lunch period.
And I remember year my lunch period was at 11:05AM.
What?
That doesn't make any sense.
My lunch is at 11:05AM.
After school I'd go and do sports and then I don't get
home until 5:00PM so.
And dinner's at 6:00PM so great.
I just seven hours of not eating.
Thanks, school.
Thanks, high school.
You rule it.
Let's take another question.
What do we have?
This is from Brian Kane.
What was your favorite grade?
Ninth, 10th, 11th, or 12th and why?
Uh, hmmm.
I liked 12th grade because at that point I knew where I was
going to college in December of 12th grade.
So I didn't have to do anything.
And school became a, a non important thing in my life.
And also I was in uh, I was in like Honors English or
something, and the class was so small that we really didn't
do anything at all.
Uh, and so I think there was nine of us in the class, or 10
of us in the class.
And at the end of the year, our teacher's
name was Mr. Howard.
Hello Mr. Howard if you're watching this.
You were a crazy person.
He used to put rubber bands on his head and pull them as hard
as he could and snap them on his forehead thinking that it
was like a funny thing to do for us.
And it wasn't.
But at the end of the year we all started once a day
stealing something from his desk and
putting it in our backpack.
And then when we graduated after our graduation we all
put a tent in his backyard.
And sat in his backyard and ate cookie cake.
And then put all of the things that we had stolen on his
porch, thinking that we were being wild.
That's the spectrum of how wild I was
in high school guys.
Let's take another comment.
This is from AlmondBaller.
What was your roommate like in college?
Um, I had a few roommates.
Ah, a friend of mine from high school was my roommate
freshman year and then she transferred
to a different college.
And then I had another girl that loved um, she was very
quiet, and she loved The Daily Show so much.
And so to give her privacy my friend from high school and I
would, would wait in--
like sit out in the hallway and do our homework to let her
watch The Daily Show.
Because if we were in the room with her, she would never
laugh out loud she would just go [SUPPRESSED LAUGHTER]
and like hold it in so hard that we were like, what?
This is awkward, let's leave.
And then as soon as we got into the hallway, five feet
from where we were, she would be like, ahahaha!
Like losing her mind.
It was amazing.
it was so, so amazing.
And I remember she had um, a RAV4.
She had a RAV4 and I was like, that girl is so privileged.
[LAUGHTER]
I had a 93 Dodge Intrepid, so she won that game.
Ah, let's take a Twitter question.
This is from Can-- can-- a--
what is this?
Canadintwinkle?
OK.
Where do you think is the worst spot to sit in class?
Ah, that's a good question.
I would say up front ish.
Ah, but if I'm a teacher and I'm teaching a class and I, I
would look into the back of the classroom and not
necessarily the front row.
Hmm.
I would say like the front center is the
worst place to sit.
I kind of liked sitting like second row all
the way to the windows.
That was kind of like where I liked to sit.
I don't like to sit in the all the way back because crazy
stuff happens back there.
But uh, yeah second row, window.
That's also where I like to sit on planes.
Hmm.
It all dates back.
Let's take a Twitter question.
This is from pumafanzola.
What if me and my friends all have the same
crush on our teacher?
Surprise!
It's illegal for your teacher to like you back, so you
better stop that crush real quick.
Ah, so all of you can have a crush on him,
but he's not gonna--
or her, whatever you're into, they're not
going to like you back.
There was a rumor of teachers-- there's always
rumors of teachers hooking up with students in high school.
That always seems to be the thing.
And now there's television shows about it.
And then--
but actually, it actually happens in real life.
Because didn't a teacher get pregnant because of her
student, or something?
Don't, don't like that teacher.
That teacher went to community college and didn't do anything
with his life so he's a teacher now.
No, just kidding.
He's a great guy, I'm sure.
He's probably into girls his own age, sorry
to break it to you.
Let's take another comment.
This is from Olivia Brock.
I am going to school in New York City this semester.
What are some awesome things to do in the city?
Oh boy.
Um.
Walking is fun.
Riding a subway with homeless people is really fun because
you just get to see firsthand like the um class divide,
which is great.
Walking on the street I heard someone tell a joke a few
months ago, and this is very true, that this is how they
knew they were a real New Yorker.
That they walked down the street, saw a human being
shitting on the sidewalk, got to work and didn't feel the
need to tell anyone at work.
It was so normal that they didn't have to bring it up.
So that's something to look forward to when you come here.
There's going to be a lot of garbage on the streets, that's
really fun.
Lots of people pushing you to get to where they want to go,
super into that.
Um, a lot of uh cab drivers won't take you where you want
to go, which is great because their job is to take you where
you want to go.
There's a lot of people that have jobs that don't
do their jobs, fun.
Um, yeah.
There's just like the best and the worst
smells to enjoy here.
So.
Can't wait for you to get here, it will be great.
Let's take a Twitter question.
Someone tweeted uh, BrettClaudio.
I'm not going back to school this fall.
Help me fit in with society.
I don't think you need help fitting in.
I think there's probably a lot of people that aren't going
back to school.
I think that's totally OK.
Are you not going back because you finished school, or you're
not going back because you don't want to go to school?
Either way I, I support you in your life choices so I think
you fit in.
I'm sorry if you-- if you feel shunned.
Look at some forums.
Google search not going back to school.
I'm sure there's a couple people out there.
Look at the hashtags on Tumblr.
See what other people are doing.
Get into GIFs, you know?
Get into GIFs.
That's really the only choice.
Guys, that's it for the show.
Oh my gosh.
We're going to keep this back to school vibe going on
tomorrow's show because Beth gets to talk with Dan Brown
and David Rees.
You don't need to sharpen your pencils yet,
he'll show you how.
Thanks for watching today.
Don't forget to subscribe.
And remember you can check me out every other day of the
week at MyDamnChannel.com/DailyGrace.
Guys, tell Beth I said hi, bye!
[BELL]
[MUSIC PLAYING]