Ticket to Ride: Wil Wheaton, Colin Ferguson, Anne Wheaton, and Amy Dallen. TableTop ep. 4


Uploaded by geekandsundry on May 18, 2012

Transcript:

WIL WHEATON: Some games are so complicated they can take
hours to learn, even for an experienced
hardcore gamer like me.
The rule books are nothing but endless pages of Byzantine
charts and tables.
But this game is so elegant and so simple you can teach it
faster than it takes you to set it up.
You could even convince your wife to play it with you.
No seriously.
My wife is here today to play this game.
Today on TableTop, Colin Ferguson, Amy Dallen, and my
wife, Anne Wheaton, are all here, and we are going to take
a Ticket to Ride.

Ticket to Ride is the 2004 German game of the year.
That's sort of like winning the Academy
Award for board games.
It's kind of a big deal.
What makes this game a winner is its beauty and its elegant
and simple game play.
We are railroad barons attempting to connect cities
together across North America in the age of steam.
At the end of the game, the player with the most points
will be declared the winner.
What a novel concept.
To get those points, we can perform one of three simple
actions on every turn.
We can draw cards face up from the board or
from the deck of mystery.
We can cash in cards of the same color to play a train
down and claim a route.
If the player is feeling particularly saucy, he can
draw a ticket.
If you complete the route outlined on the ticket before
the end of the game, you receive bonus points.
However, it's a little risky, because if you do not complete
that route, those bonus points count against you
in the final scoring.
Also, someone comes to your house and punches you in the
face before you go to bed.
Ticket to Ride is a modern-day classic.
You can learn it in minutes, but you will be playing it for
the rest of your life.
All aboard!
It is time to play Ticket to Ride.

ANNE WHEATON: My name is Anne Wheaton.
I am a hairdresser, and I am married to a super
nerdy guy named Wil.
AMY DALLEN: My name is Amy Dallen.
I sell comic books.
COLIN FERGUSON: My name is Colin Ferguson I guess if
someone knew me they'd know me from--
I'm the sheriff on a show called
Eureka on the Syfy Channel.
WIL WHEATON: Colin, it is your turn.
Go ahead and look at your starting tickets.
You can keep all of them if you like, or you can discard
one of them.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
WIL WHEATON: Colin, you will have the first move.
COLIN FERGUSON: Nightmare.
I'm never going to be able to get these.
I will discard this to start with.
WIL WHEATON: OK, cool.
I'm going to put it over here with my discard.
COLIN FERGUSON: And my first move--
WIL WHEATON: You want to put your cards there?
So you've got these cards to choose from.
You can also draw right from the deck.
Or, if you have some kind of magic starting hand, you could
even play trains.
COLIN FERGUSON: Snap.
I could play trains.
WIL WHEATON: What?
COLIN FERGUSON: No, I can't.
That was a lie.
This is probably the first time I've played this game
officially.
Good thing about the game, really easy to learn, really
easy to pick up, and really easy to get into.
I'm going to take the double yellows there.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
Here's one yellow.
Roll off a new one.
Which yellow would you like?
COLIN FERGUSON: The older one.
WIL WHEATON: The old yellow?
COLIN FERGUSON: Thank you.
WIL WHEATON: There you go.
You want the old yeller?
COLIN FERGUSON: I'll kill it.
WIL WHEATON: You have to kill that card.
COLIN FERGUSON: Shoot it.
WIL WHEATON: That's right.
It'll be your problem.
COLIN FERGUSON: And then cry.
WIL WHEATON: Yes.
And ruin a generation of children.
All right.
Good turn for you, Colin.
COLIN FERGUSON: Good times.
WIL WHEATON: Anne?
ANNE WHEATON: OK.
It's my second card.
WIL WHEATON: OK.
Excellent.
ANNE WHEATON: I am done with my turn.
COLIN FERGUSON: OK.
So I've got that.
Aw.
What an idiot.
The route that I got in the beginning was Portland to
Nashville, which is east to west, and Winnipeg to Houston.
So I got this.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
I'm going to take the wild card, which means that's the
only card I can draw.
If you draw a face-up wild card, that's the only card you
can take during your turn.
And it's the end of my turn.
Amy, please play.
AMY DALLEN: I am going to take the white one, please.
WIL WHEATON: There you go.
AMY DALLEN: And I would like the green one.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
One green card for you.
There you go.
Colin, your turn.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'm going to play some trains.
WIL WHEATON: Playing trains.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'm throwing three yellows down in between
Salt Lake City and whatever that is.
Denver.
WIL WHEATON: Dever, yep.
So three trains is worth four points.
So go ahead and grab your little blue circle-y guy there
and put him on number four.
AMY DALLEN: Nice.
WIL WHEATON: No.
On number four.
No, number four.
What kind of numbers did they teach you in Canada?
ANNE WHEATON: I feel like a mess because Amy's so
organized with the little--
WIL WHEATON: Here.
ANNE WHEATON: --choo-choos.
WIL WHEATON: Now you're less of a mess than me.
ANNE WHEATON: Yes.
OK, good.
WIL WHEATON: I'm a good husband, everybody.
ANNE WHEATON: Yes.
WIL WHEATON: A good husband.
ANNE WHEATON: Thank you.
WIL WHEATON: What you doing?
ANNE WHEATON: OK.
It's my turn.
WIL WHEATON: Yep.
ANNE WHEATON: I have played Ticket to Ride a few times.
WIL WHEATON: It's one of the very first games, along with
Settlers of Catan, that I started playing with Anne and
our two kids.
ANNE WHEATON: OK, let's do this.
I'm going to take this card.
WIL WHEATON: OK.
ANNE WHEATON: And then you're going to put more down for me
to choose from.
WIL WHEATON: Yep.
ANNE WHEATON (TUNE OF "CAMPTOWN RACES"): This is how
we play the game, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.
OK.
I'm done.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
It's my turn.
And I think I'm going to take another wild card.
And then that's going to go up there like that.
And it will now be Amy's turn.
AMY DALLEN: I get all of my destination cards.
So I have to make it to those end points.
I need to make it to all those cities.
WIL WHEATON: You're so disappointed.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'm never going to make this route.
WIL WHEATON: I can feel disappointment just
coming off of you.
It's like if there were disappointment lines drawn
around you the way someone would normally draw stink
lines around someone.
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah, but they're not stink lines.
WIL WHEATON: No.
They're disappointment lines.
COLIN FERGUSON: Disappointment lines.
Wow.
It's an uphill battle.
WIL WHEATON: Well, listen.
We've got a lot of cards--
COLIN FERGUSON: True.
WIL WHEATON: --and a lot of trains.
COLIN FERGUSON: True.
AMY DALLEN: Amy's given us a lot of time.
AMY DALLEN: Yep.
COLIN FERGUSON: That she has.
AMY DALLEN: So much time.
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah.
AMY DALLEN: Green, please.
ANNE WHEATON: So much time.
WIL WHEATON: One green card for you.
AMY DALLEN: And blind, please.
WIL WHEATON: And one mystery card from the deck of mystery.
Colin, you are up, sir.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'll take the orange.
WIL WHEATON: One orange card.
COLIN FERGUSON: And what did that get replaced with?
WIL WHEATON: Well, let's find out.
A wild card but you sadly cannot draw.
COLIN FERGUSON: Why?
WIL WHEATON: Because you can't draw a wild card--
COLIN FERGUSON: This game sucks.
Can I get the--
WIL WHEATON: Mystery card?
Or do you want a--?
COLIN FERGUSON: I'll take the black one.
WIL WHEATON: OK.
There you go.
That's a good one.
COLIN FERGUSON: Thank you.
WIL WHEATON: Yes, you're welcome.
COLIN FERGUSON: Damn.
WIL WHEATON: It was a green card.
Anne, you're up.
ANNE WHEATON: I never think of the strategy part.
It's usually that I just like playing with friends and
making fun little tracks.
And then I remember that I'm actually supposed to be
playing for winning.
I am going to--
WIL WHEATON: That's a vicious move there
ANNE WHEATON: --play a train down.
WIL WHEATON: Holy crap!
Seriously?
COLIN FERGUSON: Holy smokes.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
COLIN FERGUSON: It's called shuffling.
At the beginning of the game?
Really?
ANNE WHEATON: It's called skills.
COLIN FERGUSON: Wow.
WIL WHEATON: Three.
ANNE WHEATON: Mad skills.
WIL WHEATON: That's six.
You're going to get 15 points for that as you go from
Winnipeg to Sault St. Marie.
ANNE WHEATON: OK.
So now I want to go--
WIL WHEATON: So Colin, if you would please move
yellow up to 15.
COLIN FERGUSON: That seems wrong.
WIL WHEATON: 15, the maximum number of points you can get
for playing a train.
COLIN FERGUSON: Look at that.
WIL WHEATON: It's very exciting.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
WIL WHEATON: I am also going to play a train.
I'm going from New York to Washington, just like that.
Look at me, everyone, New York to Washington.
I'm kind of like Joe Biden on the train.
La, la, la.
Give me two points, please.
Two points for black.
Thank you very much.
COLIN FERGUSON: Stellar.
WIL WHEATON: Amy, your turn.
Play a train.
AMY DALLEN: I'm going to take two blind, please.
WIL WHEATON: Two blind cards for you.
There you are.
OK.
Colin, you're up.
COLIN FERGUSON: All right.
I'm playing.
I'm going from--
WIL WHEATON: Look at that.
COLIN FERGUSON: Four orange .
Where do you think I'm going?
WIL WHEATON: I'm thinking you're going
Denver to Kansas City.
COLIN FERGUSON: That is correct.
That's exactly what I'm doing.
WIL WHEATON: Look at what you're doing.
Four trains is worth seven, I think.
Yeah, seven points.
So go ahead and give yourself seven.
COLIN FERGUSON: I would say probably Wil is the best.
He knows the game the best.
I put one route down, and he goes, oh, I know
where you're going.
WIL WHEATON: Colin?
COLIN FERGUSON: I've all but given up.
WIL WHEATON: What?
No!
COLIN FERGUSON: I'm never going to make it.
I'm never going to make it.
WIL WHEATON: Come on.
You did a scene on Eureka where you got covered
in cold weird goo.
COLIN FERGUSON: True.
True.
All right.
I'm going to--
WIL WHEATON: If you can do that, you can do anything.
I believe in you.
COLIN FERGUSON: Thanks, guys.
With my newfound confidence, I'm going to
claim a train route.
I'm going to go from--
Do I want to take the--?
No, I don't.
I got nothing.
I'm going to take a blind card and just
pray for some humanity.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
And?
COLIN FERGUSON: It's more of the same.
I'll take another one.
WIL WHEATON: OK
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah, that there.
I'll go ahead and put that right there.
That's handy.
WIL WHEATON: As an "I've played this game a lot" guy, I
can tell you that if you're getting cards that aren't
helping out your exact plan, you could still kind of start
building things that you could patch together to make the
longest route.
Because the person with the longest route
gets 10 bonus points.
I have played so many games where that is the deciding
factor in who wins the game.
Also you can play the "look at what a giant dick I am" game
and figure out where people are going and block them.
WIL WHEATON: Yay.
AMY DALLEN: Or you could not do that.
COLIN FERGUSON: Sounds like a role made in heaven.
WIL WHEATON: Go ahead.
COLIN FERGUSON: But how can I block Atlanta to Raleigh
really quickly?
WIL WHEATON: Probably not very effectively.
ANNE WHEATON: I'm going to choo-choo connector.
WIL WHEATON: Oh, you're connecting Winnipeg to Helena.
ANNE WHEATON: I choo-choo-choose to go from
Winnipeg to Helena.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
So that is seven points for yellow.
ANNE WHEATON: Wonderous.
WIL WHEATON: Look at how yellow has
exploded into the lead.
COLIN FERGUSON: Woah.
WIL WHEATON: What in the world is going on here?
ANNE WHEATON: So I just counted out individually.
Wil and I play Sorry all the time, and he's played it so
much that when a card comes up he just is like go over here.
WIL WHEATON: She has to count it out every single time.
ANNE WHEATON: I have to count it out.
I have to enjoy, savor my card.
WIL WHEATON: Yeah.
And I'm like you are the least efficient Sorry player in the
history of this game.
ANNE WHEATON: Efficient.
AMY DALLEN: There's nothing inefficient about gloating.
ANNE WHEATON: Yes.
WIL WHEATON: I'm going to give you that one.
COLIN FERGUSON: That's always dicey when you're
playing with a couple.
WIL WHEATON: Playing with her here was just like playing
with her at home.
She's giving me a hard time about everything.
She's having a lot of fun.
AMY DALLEN: I'm taking this one, please.
And then I'm taking this one.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
COLIN FERGUSON: Damn.
Give me the two blues.
WIL WHEATON: One blue for Colin.
I saw how excited you got when that card came out.
I was like, wow.
COLIN FERGUSON: I need about six more and I'm good.
ANNE WHEATON: Hmm, where would that be, then?
COLIN FERGUSON: I wonder where I'm going.
ANNE WHEATON: Portland to Salt Lake City.
WIL WHEATON: Wow.
That's a tough one.
Oh, man.
Yeah, I see--
Oh, I think I know what route you have.
COLIN FERGUSON: It's awful.
WIL WHEATON: Oh, Colin.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'm never going to get there.
WIL WHEATON: Oh, boy.
No, listen.
There's a lot of time in this game.
COLIN FERGUSON: [INAUDIBLE].
WIL WHEATON: Look, there's a lot of trains left.
OK.
Anne Wheaton.
ANNE WHEATON: Oh, it's my turn.
Are you trying to look at my cards?
WIL WHEATON: No.
I was trying to come up and I was thinking that
I might kiss you.
COLIN FERGUSON: Aw.
ANNE WHEATON: Oh.
COLIN FERGUSON: You're so sweet.
ANNE WHEATON: You should've.
WIL WHEATON: Maybe I'll come over and kiss you.
ANNE WHEATON: Yeah.
What?
COLIN FERGUSON: What happens in the '20s stays in the '20s.
I believe the winner of the game is the person who can
both do their routes and connect them to make the
longest run.
I think I have a chance to make my routes, but I don't
think I'm going to be able to connect them and make the
longest run.

WIL WHEATON: Amy, it's your turn.
AMY DALLEN: I'd like the--
ANNE WHEATON: Review.
AMY DALLEN: --blind, please.
WIL WHEATON: One blind card coming your way.
AMY DALLEN: And a yellow.
WIL WHEATON: And a yellow card coming your way.
There you are.
Anne, you're up.
And by Anne, I mean Colin.
COLIN FERGUSON: Thank you.
I am going to claim a route.
WIL WHEATON: Really?
AMY DALLEN: What?
WIL WHEATON: How excited are you right now?
COLIN FERGUSON: I think I'm pretty excited.
I'm going through Salt Lake City to Portland.
One, two, three, four, five, six.
One, two, three, four, five, six.
WIL WHEATON: Dude.
That is worth 15 points.
Congratulations, Colin.
COLIN FERGUSON: Thank you very much.
Thank you very much.
I didn't figure I could be as amazing as I was.
And I was even more amazing.
WIL WHEATON: He's doing a really good job with the cards
he's being dealt.
AMY DALLEN: When I saw all the blue trains come down, it was
kind of easy to be happy for him, because he's far away
from cities that I'm trying to get.
So that was great, because I'm like, please, spend your
effort over there.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
WIL WHEATON: So Amy, it's your turn to play now.
AMY DALLEN: I am going to make a route, please.
COLIN FERGUSON: No.
WIL WHEATON: Claim, claim, claim the route.
Where are you claiming a route, Amy?
AMY DALLEN: From Duluth to Winnipeg, please.
WIL WHEATON: Duluth--
COLIN FERGUSON: No!
Not Duluth to Winnipeg.
You don't want that route.
That's no good.
There's danger on that route.
AMY DALLEN: There's hazards?
COLIN FERGUSON: Hazards.
WIL WHEATON: Are there bears?
COLIN FERGUSON: Yep.
And polar bears.
ANNE WHEATON: Polar bears?
AMY DALLEN: Is there any chance the bears will fight
the polar bears?
COLIN FERGUSON: I should have gone last time.
I could have gone last time.
I should have gone last time.
WIL WHEATON: Ah, shoulda, shoulda, shoulda.
All right.
Let's give Amy--
you played four right?-- so that's seven points.
AMY DALLEN: Yay.
WIL WHEATON: So 25 plus 7 is 32.
There you go.
ANNE WHEATON: I'm sort of winning.
I'm second to winning.
COLIN FERGUSON: I don't know how I'm doing, because I have
such a laundry list of colors to get.
AMY DALLEN: So far, I haven't had anyone take a route that I
couldn't easily get around.
COLIN FERGUSON: I am going from Duluth to Winnipeg.
WIL WHEATON: No, you can't.
You can't, Colin.
Sorry.
Amy's already there.
Then I'm going from Calgary to Seattle, and I'm starting a
hockey team.
WIL WHEATON: What's your hockey
team going to be called?
COLIN FERGUSON: The Seattle Calgaries.
WIL WHEATON: What a great name.
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah.
WIL WHEATON: That's awesome.
COLIN FERGUSON: I've been thinking.
I've been tossing it around for a while.
WIL WHEATON: I remember that rivalry game that you played
against the Vancouver Portlands.
COLIN FERGUSON: Oh, yeah.
That was tough.
WIL WHEATON: Man, those guys are such jerks.
ANNE WHEATON: Good times.
WIL WHEATON: That was a dirty, dirty game.
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah.
Well, we taught them a lesson.
WIL WHEATON: Yeah.
ANNE WHEATON: I'm going to build a rival team.
WIL WHEATON: Oh, OK.
ANNE WHEATON: A rival team.
WIL WHEATON: What's your rival team called?
ANNE WHEATON: It's the Vancoudles.
WIL WHEATON: Vancoudles?
OK.
Yeah.
Go Coudles!
OK.
Montreal to Boston.
Dah, dah, dah.
ANNE WHEATON: Stop it.
Joe Biden, get off the train.
WIL WHEATON: Dah, dah, dah, dah.
COLIN FERGUSON: Oh, that's bad.
WIL WHEATON: What are you talking about, bad?
If by bad you mean awesome.
AMY DALLEN: Which you could, depending on
the decade, I suppose.
WIL WHEATON: I get two points.
Two, two.
ANNE WHEATON: Wil probably has a good chance of winning
because he plays this all the time.
This is Colin's first time playing Ticket to Ride, but he
looks like he's covering a lot of territory, so
he may end up winning.
Arg.
WIL WHEATON: Colin has like a million points.
AMY DALLEN: He does have like a million points.
COLIN FERGUSON: I don't have my routes, though.
There is a tiny window that I might be able to get this
route and this route connected.
I'm just not getting the cards.
Wil shuffled them.
I'm not saying he's a cheater.
I'm not saying that it's rigged, per se.
But he and his wife are playing, and I'm
not getting any cards.
So--
WIL WHEATON: You're up, Colin.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'm going to take a card.
WIL WHEATON: Really?
Because if you played Duluth-Omaha and I played
Duluth-Omaha, we could block Amy--
AMY DALLEN: And then I could cry.
WIL WHEATON: --from a thing she's trying to do.
COLIN FERGUSON: I can't.
I can't.
I don't have the skills.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'll take a random.
WIL WHEATON: One random card.
COLIN FERGUSON: Be white.
Nope.
Now I'm going to--
WIL WHEATON: Another random card?
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah.
WIL WHEATON: OK.
COLIN FERGUSON: This is the worst game ever.
WIL WHEATON: OK, ready?
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah.
Woo-hoo.
Four different colors.
You know what that means?
Success.
WIL WHEATON: You know, in hi/low poker
we call that a bedoogie.
COLIN FERGUSON: Really?
WIL WHEATON: Yeah.
ANNE WHEATON: I'm going to do a tiny little piece of train.
Right there.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
From Seattle down to Portland.
ANNE WHEATON: Yes.
[INAUDIBLE].
WIL WHEATON: All right.
I will claim--
ANNE WHEATON: The train.
WIL WHEATON: [INAUDIBLE] the train.
Speaking of taking the train, watch me claim a route from
Duluth to Omaha.
Babow, pam-pash, shapoogh.
COLIN FERGUSON: Look at this black snake.
I'm intimidated by it.
What?
I think Wil probably is in the best position, because he has
the whole eastern seaboard.
And no one else is over there, so he can just keep expanding.
WIL WHEATON: As the game is sitting right now, I probably
need to play down maybe eight or nine trains total over a
few segments, and I think I have locked
up the longest route.
All right.
Colin, it's your turn.
COLIN FERGUSON: Give me a random card, Wil.
WIL WHEATON: One random card, coming your way.
COLIN FERGUSON: Is it what I need?
No.
WIL WHEATON: And nope.
What about this one?
COLIN FERGUSON: This one.
Go, daddy.
WIL WHEATON: Is that the card you need?
COLIN FERGUSON: Nope.
WIL WHEATON: Yeah.
COLIN FERGUSON: Keep the good times coming.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
Anne, it's your turn.
Maybe you could draw a card you don't need.
ANNE WHEATON: I will do a mystery blind--
WIL WHEATON: Mystery card.
Your mystery date is--
ANNE WHEATON: Duh, duh, duh.
WIL WHEATON: A dud.
ANNE WHEATON: OK.
So I would like a second mystery card.
WIL WHEATON: Mystery card.
ANNE WHEATON: Duh, duh duh, duh.
OK.
WIL WHEATON: And now it is Wil Wheaton's turn.
Wil Wheaton, I love that guy.
He was so great on that show I watch.
OK, so--
ANNE WHEATON: What is going on right now?
COLIN FERGUSON: We're not good enough company.
He's talking to himself.
WIL WHEATON: I'm just going to draw--
COLIN FERGUSON: I'll show you chemistry.
WIL WHEATON: I'm going to draw two cards, and it's your turn.
ANNE WHEATON: I have really good
conversations with myself.
AMY DALLEN: I'm going to make another round.
COLIN FERGUSON: The best straight man
I've ever worked with.
AMY DALLEN: Absolutely.
From St. Louis to Chicago, please.
WIL WHEATON: Look, you've got an octopus.
What are you doing?
COLIN FERGUSON: Forget the longest train.
I'm just going to throw [BEEP]
everywhere.
AMY DALLEN: All the routes.
WIL WHEATON: That's two more points for you.
Claim all the routes.
ANNE WHEATON: Don't claim all the routes.
Is that like clean all the things?
WIL WHEATON: That is exactly like clean all the things.
AMY DALLEN: Yes!
ANNE WHEATON: Yes.
WIL WHEATON: Meme identified correctly.
Win points!
COLIN FERGUSON: Is it mine again?
WIL WHEATON: Yes, it's your play.
COLIN FERGUSON: Take two cards.
WIL WHEATON: Two mystery cards?
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
Is that your card?
COLIN FERGUSON: Nope.
WIL WHEATON: Is that your card?
COLIN FERGUSON: No, it is not.
WIL WHEATON: OK.
ANNE WHEATON: You don't get more.
You only get those two.
Don't sit there looking like--
COLIN FERGUSON: And none of these are
the same color either.
Are you kidding?
ANNE WHEATON: Yay.
WIL WHEATON: Do they match with those cards?
COLIN FERGUSON: Nope.
ANNE WHEATON: He even has [INAUDIBLE].
COLIN FERGUSON: I've got six cards and one pair, and it's
not the right one.
WIL WHEATON: Wow.
ANNE WHEATON: Oh.
WIL WHEATON: That's sad times for you.
COLIN FERGUSON: Yeah.
Sadder times.
I'm just trying to get to Winnipeg.
WIL WHEATON: Really?
Winnipeg is far away.
You know what?
If you wanted to add some trains to your life just to
make you route a little longer, you could go from
Houston to New Orleans.
ANNE WHEATON: Hmm.
WIL WHEATON: Or House-ton to N'awlins.
ANNE WHEATON: House-ton.
COLIN FERGUSON: I will.
I will use my one--
WIL WHEATON: But you can't go now because you drew cards
[INAUDIBLE].
COLIN FERGUSON: You know what?
That's just push, pull, push, pull.
I've dated you before.
That never turns out well.
WIL WHEATON: What do you want, Anne?
ANNE WHEATON: I would like a mystery box card.
WIL WHEATON: Mystery box.
Did you get Colin's card?
ANNE WHEATON: I think I did.
I would like another one of Colin's cards, please.
WIL WHEATON: Mystery box.
COLIN FERGUSON: Anne's the one who goes, oh, I have 45 wild
cards, dah.
I'm going to go from, oh, anywhere I want
to anywhere I want.
WIL WHEATON: I am going to take--
AMY DALLEN: Anne just invented the bullet train.
ANNE WHEATON: Yay.
WIL WHEATON: --one of Colin's cards and also
one of Colin's cards.
COLIN FERGUSON: You jest, but it's true.
WIL WHEATON: I have to say, whoever shuffled these cards
did a painfully good job of mixing them up.
COLIN FERGUSON: Right?
What I heard from what as said was stick to the outside, go
for the long runs, and try to connect it to the
mission that you had.
AMY DALLEN: Playing through the middle is awesome, because
you have a lot more double routes you can choose, and
also because it's much easier to go places without
telegraphing where you're trying to get.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
WIL WHEATON: OK.
Amy, you're up.
AMY DALLEN: I'll take the middle orange, please.
WIL WHEATON: One middle orange.
OK.
COLIN FERGUSON: Sexy.
AMY DALLEN: And the one on the end.
WIL WHEATON: And the one on the end.
COLIN FERGUSON: Ooh, nice.
Oh, I think I know where someone's going.
WIL WHEATON: Oh, god, I know what you're doing.
COLIN FERGUSON: Oh, it's mine.
WIL WHEATON: It's your turn, Colin.
COLIN FERGUSON: And guess what route I'm about to claim?
WIL WHEATON: Oh, come on.
Is it going to happen?
ANNE WHEATON: No!
COLIN FERGUSON: I got one, two, three,
four, wild, and wild.
WIL WHEATON: Yes!
COLIN FERGUSON: I'm going to Winnipeg, everybody.
Yeah!
WIL WHEATON: Guess what you get.
15 points, Colin.
When calling connected Calgary to Winnipeg, it was all over.
COLIN FERGUSON: I knew that was--
I needed that desperately.
AMY DALLEN: I totally rooted when he got long routes
because I didn't care because he wasn't in my way.
And now I feel like a sucker.
WIL WHEATON: I think that you the longest
route away from me.
Sorry.
COLIN FERGUSON: You got the longest route.
You go from Florida to Omaha via Montreal.
WIL WHEATON: It's pretty long, but--
Listen, my route's pretty long, but it's
not as long as yours.
COLIN FERGUSON: Well, you know.
ANNE WHEATON: Hey-o.
COLIN FERGUSON: Who cares, really, whether there's an
embarrassment of riches?
WIL WHEATON: I will draw.
AMY DALLEN: That's an oddly generous way to end a
contest like that.
I've never seen that.
WIL WHEATON: Amy you're up.
AMY DALLEN: Let's agree to enjoy our success.

ANNE WHEATON: Oh my god, what is happening right now?
WIL WHEATON: Before anybody really knows what's happening,
Colin has exploded his train routes all
over the entire board.
His longest train is so long that it actually
loops around on itself.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'm stunned to be around myself.
But really any time I get to watch myself strategize, it's
looking in the eyes of a genius.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
WIL WHEATON: I do not have a whole lot of trains left, so
we are getting close to what will be the end game phase--
ANNE WHEATON: Is it my turn?
WIL WHEATON: --of this game.
Yes, baby, it's your turn.
COLIN FERGUSON: And the game is over when we have--?
WIL WHEATON: When one player has zero, one, or two trains,
that creates the final round.
And so that player goes around one more time and
back to that player.
ANNE WHEATON: Oh, my god.
Something about continuing to play.
So five red cards.
I'm going to Helena to da-Omaha.
AMY DALLEN: Da-Omaha?
ANNE WHEATON: Da-Oh.
COLIN FERGUSON: Oh, you're using the hub technique.
ANNE WHEATON: Da-Omaha.
WIL WHEATON: You have an incredible hub right there.
So from 5 gives you 10.
Anne, you get 10.
You're at 54 right now.
COLIN FERGUSON: Snap.
ANNE WHEATON: Excuse me.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.
AMY DALLEN: 10!
ANNE WHEATON: 10.
WIL WHEATON: They put numbers right on there so you don't
have to do that.
ANNE WHEATON: Stop taking that away from me.
WIL WHEATON: OK.
I'm not.
You can have it.
ANNE WHEATON: Fine.
WIL WHEATON: Your face is taking that away from me.
ANNE WHEATON: Yes.
WIL WHEATON: All right--
COLIN FERGUSON: Nice.
WIL WHEATON: I will take this card.
ANNE WHEATON: Do you see what I have to live with?
COLIN FERGUSON: It's amazing.
You're a strong woman.
ANNE WHEATON: Thank you.
WIL WHEATON: OK.
Go ahead.
It's your turn, Amy.
AMY DALLEN: I am going to Boston now.
ANNE WHEATON: Baked something about baked beans.
COLIN FERGUSON: [INAUDIBLE] two for that?
AMY DALLEN: I probably do.
COLIN FERGUSON: Ah, look at this.
Three.
WIL WHEATON: Yeah?
COLIN FERGUSON: That draws me down two trains.
WIL WHEATON: Oh, boy.
COLIN FERGUSON: And we're in our final
round, and I'm going--
ANNE WHEATON: No.
COLIN FERGUSON: Nooo.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
There you go.
ANNE WHEATON: Stop it.
WIL WHEATON: The final round has begun.
ANNE WHEATON: Take his cards.
OK.
So then I'm going to do that also in a less exciting
fashion by going from San Francisco to da-Los Angeles.
Winner.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
So you get four for that.
I have a three here, and I'm going to claim a route of
three somewhere on the board.
I'm actually going to go El Paso to Phoenix.
COLIN FERGUSON: Nice.
ANNE WHEATON: So this means when it comes
back around to you--
so I don't get to play again.
COLIN FERGUSON: No.
WIL WHEATON: One, two, three, four.
COLIN FERGUSON: No.
AMY DALLEN: I guess since I have the one last move I
should do this.
COLIN FERGUSON: Oh my god!
ANNE WHEATON: Oh my god.
What in the world?
AMY DALLEN: I would like to go, please,
from Oklahoma City--
ANNE WHEATON: This is horrible.
AMY DALLEN: --to El Paso.
WIL WHEATON: Oklahoma City to El Paso--
ANNE WHEATON: So tragic.
WIL WHEATON: --will get you 10 points.
Look at you.
46 to 56.
AMY DALLEN: Not quite in last.
ANNE WHEATON: Hello?
Hello?
WIL WHEATON: Oh, man, look at that.
COLIN FERGUSON: I'll take that to my grave.
WIL WHEATON: I'm the caboose.
I'm such a caboose, I'm going to bring all
the boys to the yard.
Colin, it's your last--
COLIN FERGUSON: Well, I got one card, so I'm
throwing down a red.
And I'm going from either Raleigh--
Oh, no.
I'm going to Nashville to Atlanta.
WIL WHEATON: All right.
AMY DALLEN: Oh my goodness.
WIL WHEATON: Let's just go ahead and count
up all these routes.
And let's see--
ANNE WHEATON: He says "roots" and I saw "routs".
COLIN FERGUSON: I go both ways with that
WIL WHEATON: --where.
Hey, Boyan, come out here.
BOYAN RADAKOUICH: We have four.
I'm glad we're counting because if you guys win by one
or two, I want to make sure it's right.
ANNE WHEATON: And whoever wins gets a Rolex!
Oh, [BEEP]
COLIN FERGUSON: And Wil almost has a heart attack.
You can see he sort of stands like this.
He's like OK.
WIL WHEATON: What did you do?
AMY DALLEN: She distracted us by not seeming like she wanted
to knock everything over.
WIL WHEATON: You could just feel everyone go--
AMY DALLEN: If that was not nerd rage, then I don't know
what it was.
ANNE WHEATON: Oh, no.
It wasn't nerd rage at all.
That was having no idea that that table was flexible and
those little trains go flying.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
WIL WHEATON: 34, 35, 36, 37, 38.
Are you serious?
COLIN FERGUSON: I went from Winnipeg to
New Orleans via Portland.
WIL WHEATON: Well, here, You get the longest route and also
least efficient means of train travel.
Let's go ahead and move you up to 80-freaking-1.
OK.
So now we're going to go ahead, and we
will reveal our tickets.
And we will find out if we completed routes and if we did
not complete routes.
Completed routes get bonuses.
Non-completed routes get penalties.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
WIL WHEATON: Colin, you win.
COLIN FERGUSON: That's fantastic.
WIL WHEATON: You win at your very first game ever.
COLIN FERGUSON: Wow.
All is right with the world.
AMY DALLEN: My experience from start to finish.
Ooh, cards.
I don't think I can do that.
Maybe I can do that.
Trains, trains, trains, trains, trains, trains, not
noticing that Colin has a million trains.
WIL WHEATON: Colin has never played before, and he
destroyed us.
That is the absolute beauty of a game with very simple rules
that's very high luck and very high strategy.
ANNE WHEATON: You know, the problem with him is he started
out with his I don't get any cards that are the same.
That was how he threw us off.
We felt sorry for him.
WIL WHEATON: Yeah.
Colin's entire strategy was flim-flam and rope-a-dope.
COLIN FERGUSON: Ahh, what an idiot.
WIL WHEATON: I'm going to go downstairs and talk to Colin
And find out exactly how he managed to destroy three
people that he destroyed.
AMY DALLEN: Lies and flim-flam.
ANNE WHEATON: That's what he did.
That's totally what he did.
WIL WHEATON: I have to know if you were legitimately playing
the rope-a-dope strategy.
COLIN FERGUSON: No.
If you look back over the footage, I was completely
stressed when I got those routes, the north/south and
the east/west.
And I had to connect them somehow and for half the game
was going to connect via the south.
And I didn't think I was going to do it.
WIL WHEATON: We all felt so bad for you.
And then it was like wait a--
Wait a minute.
You have so many trains, you've actually made a loop in
the middle of the game.
COLIN FERGUSON: Yes.
WIL WHEATON: Look, you totally won victory.
COLIN FERGUSON: Thank you.
WIL WHEATON: You totally earned winning victory.
COLIN FERGUSON: Well, it was a group effort.
WIL WHEATON: You also get the TableTop trophy of awesome.
COLIN FERGUSON: Wow.
WIL WHEATON: It's got cheerleaders.
COLIN FERGUSON: It's you and me holding up awesome.
WIL WHEATON: Yeah, we totally are.
That's exactly what it is.
So let me just pull it back here and write
your name on it.
Colin.
COLIN FERGUSON: Wow.
It's a spare-no-expense affair.
WIL WHEATON: Yep.
It totally is.
And I'm going to put this to you.
Now, Colin, if you would like to make any kind of victory
speech or maybe say anything to the camera--
COLIN FERGUSON: Oh, sure.
I accept this trophy on behalf of all that is good and right
and pure and true.
And I hope that the world is a better place for it.
WIL WHEATON: That's a beautiful speech.
COLIN FERGUSON: Thank you.
WIL WHEATON: I hope the next person who gets this trophy
makes the same speech.
I have to actually take it back because--
COLIN FERGUSON: It's my trophy.
WIL WHEATON: No.
We don't have enough money in the budget--
COLIN FERGUSON: It's you and me holding up awesome.
WIL WHEATON: --for more than one trophy.
But look, what you get to keep is this piece of tape with
your name on it.
COLIN FERGUSON: Oh, wow.
WIL WHEATON: That's yours.
You can take it to the bank.
COLIN FERGUSON: Awesome.
I'm taking a piece of tape to the bank.
WIL WHEATON: And we will see you next time on TableTop.