Game Program Attack! - War Soldiers (Pilot)

Uploaded by MondoMedia on 06.04.2012

[Red:] Ba-Boom! [Blue:] Oh yeah!
[Red:] Fuck yes! [Blue:] We're the best!
[Red:] I was like "Ba-bap bap bap bap!"
[Blue:] Yeh! And I was all like, "Pew pew-pew pew pew!"
(Imitating gun sounds)
[Red:] Heh heh.
With my muscles.
[Yellow:] Yeah, he must've had a "splitting" headache.
Heh... right?
... From all the bullets?
[Red:] He's DEAD, man.
The hell is THIS shit?
[Yellow:] Yeah, who said they could use crazy made-up monster things?
We are going to die here.
[Red:] Dude! Hold yourself together, bro!
[Blue:] We can totally take him.
Eat some of this, Mr. Vag Mouth!
Pew! Pew! Pew! Pew!
Yo dawg! My bullets ain't doin' shit!
[Red:] Use your spread shot, brah.
That should do somethin' or whatever.
What "spreadshot?"
[Red:] The one you picked up.
In the armory.
Mother fucker!
[Yellow:] Next to the warehouse entrance?
[Blue:] I thought you picked up the spreadshot.
[Yellow:] Oh god!
[Red:] Bitch, does this look like "spreadshot" to you?
[Blue:] Well... shit.
[Yellow:] I'll go back and get it.
I think I can even see it from here!
What the... you guys!
I can't go back!
What is happening!?
[Blue:] First, giant pussy-faced dragons
and now witchcraft. Awesome.
[Yellow:] We couldn't even afford body armor.
My nipples are so cold.
[Blue:] I just thought we were going for the "Shirtless Badass" look today.
[Red:] Guys! We can all agree our muscles look really awesome.
But in retrospect, body armor would have been a good-
[Yellow:] Power crate! They DO care!
They do care...
[Blue:] Aw, fuck yeah, bro!
[Red:] What the hell, dick?
[Yellow:] Hey, I saw it first, jerkface!
[Blue:] Too bad, bitch! I'mma get the thing,
I'mma shoot the pussy-face,
And I'mma get all the chicks
with the big, floppy, ti-
[Red:] Whoa!
[Blue:] Tiittiiiiiiiiiesss...
[Red:] Christ shit!
(Yellow vomits)
[Red:] Bean?
(Frantic breathing)
[Red:] Alright, twat-face.
Suck my big, metaphorical,
gun-shaped diiiiiI I I I I I I I I I I I I I I -
Fuck you power paaa-
[Yellow:] Power crate...
[Blue:] (gargling)
[Red:] Aaaaaaah!
[Yellow:] Wha- ?
Did we... win?
I... I did it!
No more!