You Suck at Photoshop - Shadows and Light

Uploaded by MyDamnChannel on 31.10.2008


DONNIE: My name is Donnie, and you suck at Photoshop, but how
hard have you tried?

A bunch of pee-pee pants last week were all colicky because
I'm not showing heavy duty Photoshop techniques.
And I'm just--
you're just--
you just keep opening up your doughnut catchers, and just
keep trying to complain and--
You don't teach us this.
Just shut the fff---
all holes on your head.
And here you go.
Here you go, smarty pants.
Get your hand out of your Garanimals, and let's do some

So you want to see the big time?
You want to see the big stuff?
Well, let's go take a look at a Photoshop
masterpiece in the making.
This is--
let's say you've been working on the ultimate life
storytelling painting chronicling your life, and
now's the time to share it with all of the dummies that
have been watching you for so long.
And you're telling a story that can only be told with
Photoshop, about the Ring of Infinite Sorrows, and its
commanding power, and-- and the hold it has over you, and
its keeper, the ring whore, dragon whore.
and the battle that is constantly being waged by who
you thought were your friends in a place that you created to
get in touch with people a little bit better, but that
didn't seem to work.
And then along the way, the friends that you thought you
had made turned out to be betrayers.
And you know, you've taken painstaking time to--
In one case, one of them had a horrible, horrible
hairsplosion, and you wanted to chronicle that.
And in fact--
you want to see some good technique?
I actually--
you have to-- you had to actually create the hair,
because it kept changing each day.
But that's--
this is what I'm talking about.
I'm talking about Photoshop as a--
for composition, to tell a story.
I don't know if you're capable of it or not.

We see a theme here, don't we?
A theme of good versus evil, light versus dark.
Maybe that's the lesson that you need to learn, is the way
that the light and the shadow work together, and sometimes
work against each other.
And just when you think you have the light, you end up
with the shadow.
So let's take a look at the ring whore.
And in this case, we started out with a ring whore that
really was sort of flat and lifeless and didn't have all
of the-- the evilness and deceit that we needed to show.
How did we achieve that?
How did we get to something so incredibly awesome, such as
this, that made it look realistic-ish
and all that stuff?
Well, here's what we do.
Hold on to your pants, because this is
Photoshop at light speed.
Going to duplicate this layer, and we're going to take this
layer, and we're going to go to Image,
Adjust, Brightness Contrast.
Use Legacy, because the people who make Photoshop keep trying
to make it better.
They don't know what the hell they're doing.
Take your brightness all the way down, until you get the
most dark and despicable evil you can.
Bring the contrast down a little bit so that it looks as
real as possible, and click OK.
Now we've got--
we can create some depth.
All we're going to do--
and here's a tool that you're used to, the eraser tool.
Grab the eraser, the brush, the eraser tool, and get a
good size brush and work with a reasonable flow, so that you
can make it look natural.
And what we're going to do is, we've got this light of
goodness shining down, and we want to show the light hitting
the parts of the ring whore where they belong, and create
some depth.
We could do it all along the way here, where we think that
light's going to hit.
And don't worry, there's still plenty of darkness
where this came from.
You can see that we're adding some depth in those folds of
the ring whore's dirty, cankerous wings, where the
light is going to play and the shadows are still
going to fall off.
You know, whatever you think looks good.
And then when you-- you want to get the real slick,
glisteny griminess, I created a layer of highlights, and you
can add some more.

We just don't know what's good or what's bad anymore.
We'd like to think that there's a light shining down
from up above that's going to wash
away all of this darkness.

Just streaming down from a place where happiness and joy
can come from, sort of maybe with a gradient to transparent
sort of stream that makes us feel like there can be some
goodness awash of the darkness.

And one that can come and take away all the pain.
And just go grab your Gaussian blur and make that look a
little more natural and heavenly, like that.
And bring the opacity down a little bit, too.
A little bright.

You know, we just--
so much darkness and despair, so much deceit.

People who we thought were our friends maybe even turned on
us in a way that was unexpected by not picking up
the thumb drives when they were supposed to, and then
letting them get in the hands of some cavalier asswipe on
the web, who posted everything, including your
last will and testament.
It's just really unreasonable, and maybe you just want to
tell that person that you think they're--
they broke a trust boundary.
SN4TCHBUCL3R: Ahh, no, no.
You've got to counter [INAUDIBLE] man.
Look, watch.
DONNIE: Do you know what happened to me?
SN4TCHBUCL3R: Ahh, man, are you still being like a night
elf about those thumb drives, man?
Get over it.
DONNIE: Do you know what happened, you fff---
ass launcher?
They posted it for everyone to see.
SN4TCHBUCL3R: Look, I've got more important things to worry
about in stupid Peopleburg, you know, thanks to you, wang.
DONNIE: They posted it for everyone to see, and now I'm
going to get killed.
Just pinch a res from someone, stupid.
DONNIE: No, you fff--
in the real world.
I'm going to get killed.
SN4TCHBUCL3R: Yeah, you know, tough luck, man.
You know, what can I say?
DONNIE: How about, game over, man.
game over?
WTF, man.
What are you talking about, game over?
Now look, wait a minute.
No, no.
Wait a minute, man.
Wait a minute, man.
what the-- we're offline?
Are we offline?
Peopleburg is offline?
you shut down Peopleburg.
Ah, man, we were just about to complete the
liberation, and you fuck--
ahh, shit.
All right.
You know what?
I'm going to kill you, Donnie Hoyle.
I'm going to kill you.
What is that?