Vaginal Fantasy Ep. 11: "White Trash Zombie"


Uploaded by geekandsundry on 27.11.2012

Transcript:

FELICIA DAY: Alright, let's talk.
Let's ask everybody.
BONNIE BURTON: OK.
FELICIA DAY: Hello everybody.
I believe we're live right now.
Let me look over at my other computer.
Yes, we are.
Hey, it is Vaginal Fantasy time.
And if you'll notice, I cloned Veronica.

VERONICA BELMONT: Oh, but now we can't make that joke that
we don't actually look alike anymore because now we
actually look exactly alike.
FELICIA DAY: We look exactly alike.
And when I logged into the test chat, I was like, whoa.
I mean, I can't even tell us apart.
VERONICA BELMONT: I was like, whoa.
FELICIA DAY: You were like, whoa.
VERONICA BELMONT: It was my surprise.
FELICIA DAY: I don't know, I got really life disrupted and
was, like, I've got to change my life, and then, of course,
what is it, it's just bangs.
BONNIE BURTON : But it's a good change.
That's important.
VERONICA BELMONT: Little bangs make a big difference.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, Kiala you're the only one
without bangs now.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I know.
I've been growing mine out, and now I'm
starting to regret it.
Although I am an iconoclast.
FELICIA DAY: You are an iconoclast.
You are iconic, though.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Aww.
FELICIA DAY: This month is November, and we have only
Bonnie Burton here.
BONNIE BURTON: Hi.
FELICIA DAY: We have Kiala Kazebee.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah, hi.
BONNIE BURTON: Did you pronounce that right?
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
Finally did.
She's only got eleven of them.
FELICIA DAY: And Veronica Belmont.
VERONICA BELMONT: Hello.
BONNIE BURTON: Otherwise known as Evil Felicia.
VERONICA BELMONT: No, I don't have a mustache.
FELICIA DAY: You could put it--
BONNIE BURTON: Or is Felicia Evil Veronica?
VERONICA BELMONT: I did the bangs first.
I just want to put that out there.
FELICIA DAY: No, she has the original haircut here.
I did not even know.
I went to the woman and was like, change me, but I can't
cut my hair off.
And then this is what she did.
And then I didn't know I was--
I did not bring a picture of you in there, and said "Make
me look exactly like Veronica."
BONNIE BURTON: You totally Single White Femaled Veronica.
FELICIA DAY: I did.
I'm actually outside your house right now.
VERONICA BELMONT: Where did all my Google-y things go
where I could put a mustache on myself?
FELICIA DAY: You've got to go Google them.
VERONICA BELMONT: They moved them.
I don't--
Oh, there they are.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Over there.
FELICIA DAY: So, if you're just entering this, and don't
know what the heck this is, this is Vaginal Fantasy.
It is not what you probably think it is.
It's a book club where every month we read--
nice mustache--
we read paranormal a romance, usually a paranormal romance
book, and we share our thoughts about the book.
And, sometimes, the alt book of the month.
And we have a really cool forum on Goodreads, and if you
check the description of this video later, after we archive
it, you can get there and participate as well.
So we have been going for eleven months now And before
we get to the book, I just want to thank everybody for
being awesome, especially our community members.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yay
BONNIE BURTON: Yay.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Thank you.
FELICIA DAY: And that we had a couple meet-ups this month.
Veronica and Bonnie, what did you do?
VERONICA BELMONT: We had a very awesome meet-up at
Borderlands Cafe here in San Francisco, not too far from
where we both live, actually.
And it was amazing.
We had like-- how many people showed up?
Like, 12 people or more?
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, it was a full table.
And it was mixed, guys and girls, so it was cool to have
guys there.
And they brought chocolate, like Ghirardelli chocolate.
And salted caramels.
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh my gosh.
And we drank hot cider.
And we had hot chocolate.
BONNIE BURTON: And it was great.
We just went around the table and everyone talked about who
their favorite authors were, their favorite books that
we've covered.
And they gave us so many suggestions, and I think
Veronica just saved them all on her Good Reads.
So hopefully we'll bring that up again.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, they gave us a lot.
BONNIE BURTON: They gave us a lot of suggestions of books we
should be reading that are both paranormal, or some sort
of steampunk, or were all very saucy.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yes.
We had a blast.
FELICIA DAY: I did the same thing.
I was in Australia the last couple weeks.
I was at the Supernova Conventions.
And we had a meet-up after in Brisbane.
And we had an amazing turn-out.
Yeah, there were like 20 people.
And thank goodness for some of the ladies who organized it,
Hopefully they uploaded some pictures to the group.
But we went around and we said our favorite book and author,
no matter if it was like a romance or not.
And there are a lot of guys there, too, who read the books
with us, but also just were there as a plus one.
But we all really were excited to talk about some of the
authors we like, and the books that we were reading
currently, and what they thought about the book club.
So it turned out really good.
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh, and also, a special thank you to
Amanda, who I met at the Geek Media Expo.
She gave me this lovely google-y eyed wine, which I'm
enjoying right now.
So thank you very much.
It is delicious.
I wish I could share it with you ladies as well.
I'll get drunk for you.
FELICIA DAY: I'm drinking kale juice.
VERONICA BELMONT: Kale juice?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Really?
BONNIE BURTON: Kale juice?
FELICIA DAY: Guys, I have stomach issues, and I'm trying
to get past them.
And kale juice seems to help.
So it's kale, celery, cucumber, romaine.
VERONICA BELMONT: I love kale juice.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I love kale, too.
I'm going to try that.
You know what's been working for me--
digression--
is these papaya enzymes, I think from Whole Foods.
FELICIA DAY: Ooo.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah.
You just chew on them, and they really help your
digestive system.
Like, right after you eat.
FELICIA DAY: So it's not real papaya?
It's a pill?
KIALA KAZEBEE: No, it's an enzyme.
Yeah, it's a pill.
VERONICA BELMONT: You can take acidophilus, too.
That helps with gut troubles.
FELICIA DAY: Can we talk about are lactose intolerance?
No?
Okay, let's move on.
VERONICA BELMONT: I'll fight you on that.
BONNIE BURTON: Well, we covered that before because
when we were in standby waiting for you, Veronica, I
told them that I was--
I think I have to have surgery for gallbladder issues.
Because--
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh no.
BONNIE BURTON: Do you remember when you were talking to me at
my desk, about this book that we're about to discuss.
And I had that weird look at on my face?
That's because I was having a sharp pain
going through my gut.
VERONICA BELMONT: She was going, uugggh.
BONNIE BURTON: I thought I was going to pass out.
And I didn't want you to think I was going to pass out from
talking about zombies, because that would
totally makes me a wuss.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, totally.
Well, good.
That sucks.
I hope you feel better.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, me too.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
After reading in this book--
Yeah, I can't imagine.
Let me just give a couple of shout-outs to some local
meet-ups happening this month, or have happened.
In the Twin Cities, at Stout's Pub there was a meet-up.
Phoenix, at Brick.
Chicago, at the Bourgeois Pig.
And New York City, at Argote.
North Hollywood, at the Steampunk Cafe.
And Saint Louis, at the Shameless Grounds.
All are either having one or had one, so check the forums
for all the info.
And we had a big NaNoWriMo group Did any
of you guys do that?
VERONICA BELMONT: I'm almost done.
BONNIE BURTON: [SIGH]
VERONICA BELMONT: I'm almost done.
I'm at 44,000 words.
I will finish by the 30th.
It's not good.
It's not a good story.
BONNIE BURTON: I got as far as 10,000 words and stopped.
VERONICA BELMONT: You had 6,000 on your page, so you
need to update that crap.
BONNIE BURTON: I need to update it, but I don't want
anyone to know that I'm that far because then everyone is
going to want to read it.
And it sucks.
FELICIA DAY: Did you outline it first, Veronica, or did you
just sit down and was like, I'm just going to write.
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh, I just wrote the poop as it came.
Words just kept happening.
I should have had some papaya pills for the brain, because
it was just not a healthy situation.
So it's almost done.
It's going to be something, it will be a thing.
And then I will never look at it ever again.
FELICIA DAY: But were you drunk when you
were writing it?
Or it was--
VERONICA BELMONT: Only once.
And that's very difficult.
And looking back on the stuff that I wrote a little bit
drunk, was just like, really, you have the intellect of a
fourth grader.
This is just now even--
FELICIA DAY: Poopy.
Poopy.
VERONICA BELMONT: You are a grown ass woman.
Get it together.
BONNIE BURTON: How are the sex scenes?
VERONICA BELMONT: There's no sex scenes.
There's barely even a flirtation between two of the
main characters.
They work out a lot together--
BONNIE BURTON: Veronica.
FELICIA DAY: What?
VERONICA BELMONT: --which is the extent
of their sexy times.
BONNIE BURTON: There is supposed to be sex scenes,
which is probably why it's not very good.
VERONICA BELMONT: Now maybe I should copy your sex scenes
and put them in at the very end of my story.
BONNIE BURTON: You're welcome to, there's only so many words
in the dictionary that rhyme with-- or that are in the
thesaurus for "throbbing," I found out, so.
VERONICA BELMONT: Pulsating.
Pulsing.
BONNIE BURTON: There ya go.
FELICIA DAY: All of the comments on the video are
like, why did Felicia Single White Female Veronica?

Guys, I'm reading this.
Rude.
So, this month's books were Veronica's picks.
Veronica, do you want to take over and tell everybody about
your books?
VERONICA BELMONT: Sure.
Our main pick was, "My Life as a White Trash Zombie," by
Diana Roland, who is very cool, and answered a lot of my
questions about the book on Twitter
before we started reading.
So I kind of knew, right off the bat, that it wasn't in the
typical vein of our books.
There's not a lot of overt sexy times in it.
But there is a romantic interest.
And I just really liked it.
I thought it was a lot of fun.
I loved the character, Angel.
I thought she was really-- she's different from a lot of
the characters I've read.
She's kind of like if you took--
what's your face?

I want to say "True Blood," but it's not.
It's not "True Blood." What's her name?
I can't remember her name.
FELICIA DAY: Anna Paquin?
VERONICA BELMONT: The character she plays.
FELICIA DAY: Oh, Sookie Stackhouse.
VERONICA BELMONT: Sookie.
She's kind of like an even trashier Sookie.
But I thought it was fun.
I got a big kick out of it.
I liked the way they handled the zombie
mythology in the story.
It was a slightly different take than typical zombie tales
and zombie creation myths.
And yeah, overall, I gave it a four out of five on Goodreads,
I think, because some of it felt a little bit--
it was kind of like a young adult novel.
I can't fault it for that, but I wish it had gone a little
more in-depth, a little more serious, a little darker.
But that's my own personal preference.
But I would like to read the next book in the series, and
keep on going with her story, too.
FELICIA DAY: Cool.
Kiala, what did you think of our book this month?
KIALA KAZEBEE: I did not like it.
VERONICA BELMONT: Aww.
FELICIA DAY: Wow.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I know, I'm know, I'm sorry.
I didn't like it.
There was no sex, one.
A. But also, I didn't really like the character, or any of
the characters.
And it was YA, which is fine.
But--
sorry, my ear thing fell out.
Sorry, my ear was falling off because I'm a zombie.
So
FELICIA DAY: Oh god.
KIALA KAZEBEE: But I couldn't get into any of the
characters, and story line.
I just really couldn't get into it.
There was nothing about it that pulled me in.
So like I said, I'm sorry.
VERONICA BELMONT: That's okay.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, everybody's got--
I didn't think it was young adult.
I don't think a book has to be young adult to
have no sex in it.
It could be an adult book with no sex in it, and I think
that's what this one was.
They had a little bit of romance, but I think that was
one of the weakest things in the book, that the romance
wasn't really that justified in my eyes.
But I really loved the world.
And it took me a little bit to get into because, I'm from
Alabama, guys, so I know white trash.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Are you really?
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: Really?
Because you don't emulate South at all.
FELICIA DAY: I grew up in Alabama,
Mississippi, and Texas.
KIALA KAZEBEE: No way.
Well, I knew Texas.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, I knew Texas, too,
but I didn't know--
BONNIE BURTON: I knew you went to Texas for college, but.
VERONICA BELMONT: Neat.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, my dad was in the military, so I was
stationed in military bases all over the South.
So I know the South really well.

I couldn't buy cowboy boots until I moved to California.
So it took me a couple chapters to
get into her character.
But I almost like this book despite
wanting to not like it.
And I really thought some of the relationships were
interesting, and I did like the zombie mythology a lot.
It was different.
It was disgusting, and I did not like that part.
Like the whole--
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah, it was pretty gross.
FELICIA DAY: The smoothie thing was--
I have a problem with texture, anyway.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah, chunky smoothie?
Ew.
FELICIA DAY: I can't eat instant potatoes.
I can't drink smoothies anyway, so the fact that there
were chunks in the smoothies made me want to hurl
continuously.
KIALA KAZEBEE: It made me think of bubble teas.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: I like bubble teas.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I can't.
Ugh.
VERONICA BELMONT: Really?
Anyway.
OK.
And Bonnie, what did you think?
BONNIE BURTON: Did you just bite the head off of that
cookie, Felicia?
Way to zombie out.
[ZOMBIE NOISE]
BONNIE BURTON: I thought the book was okay.
It wasn't sexy times, which I normally prefer, as you know.
Because I prefer sex.
VERONICA BELMONT: I prefer sex to not sex.
BONNIE BURTON: To not.
VERONICA BELMONT: Generally speaking.
BONNIE BURTON: And I didn't find her to be white trash.
I kind of found her to be more punk rock than white trash.
I don't know, I didn't get the white trash vibe.
But, yeah, that first description of that, is it a
frappaccino or is it body parts?

I was actually drinking a frappaccino when
I was reading that.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh no.
BONNIE BURTON: And it was extra icy, frothy, and so as I
was drinking, I was like, oh, this was a poor choice to
drink this.
VERONICA BELMONT: Maybe that will teach you to not drink
frappuccinos.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: It's not good for you, because
Starbucks is gross.
BONNIE BURTON: Maybe drink tapioca tea.
VERONICA BELMONT: Tapioca tea is delicious.
BONNIE BURTON: I know.
FELICIA DAY: Tapioca tea is delicious because it's water
in texture, and then you've just got chewy chunks.
That's fine.
I don't like a thick fluid in my mouth.
BONNIE BURTON: Well, that's the first description of the
frappaccino.
VERONICA BELMONT: That's what you said.
FELICIA DAY: I know.
BONNIE BURTON: --at the bottom.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: [INAUDIBLE]
Yeah, so, I don't know.
I was kind of annoyed by the main character.
I tried to get into this book.
I liked the alt book a lot better.
FELICIA DAY: Really?
VERONICA BELMONT: Well, let's talk about
"Dearly Departed" then.
FELICIA DAY: Well, no, let's talk about the zombie book and
then we'll move onto "Dearly Departed." I had a lot of
comments on--
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, just because I want to know if
there's any user questions or--
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
We have a lot of comments, and a lot of people--
I would say more people liked this book on
the forums than not.
Tiffany said, "I wasn't too sure I would like this book
because I'm not a huge zombie fan." Join the club.
"But it had just enough icky brain stuff in it without
skeeving me out." The comments tended to be like, I didn't
really want to read this book, but I really liked it
afterwards.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, she did a good job.
I thought it was cool what she was doing.
You know what I mean?
It was interesting that it wasn't just your atypical
zombie stuff.
They made it kind of more interesting.
So now when I watch old episodes of "CSI" I'm like,
"Oh, I wonder if the coroners' driver is a zombie girl."
Because there's a cool girl on "Body of Proof" that was the
driver for the mortician, that was the love
interest for a while.
I totally kept envisioning her as this character in the book
because she's so cool on "Body of Proof." So when I was
casting it in my head, even though she's not blond on the
show, and whatever.
And I liked the book.
There were times it took me out of it.
The descriptions were kind of egh.
And there were other times when I'm trying to picture
what she's doing, and I don't understand it.
Like when she said she kept scrubbing her face.
FELICIA DAY: Ugh
BONNIE BURTON: What did that mean?
FELICIA DAY: I don't know.
It means something gross I skipped over, I think.
[INAUDIBLE]
VERONICA BELMONT: I can't hear you over all the adorable-ness
on your couch right now.
BONNIE BURTON: Oh god, [INAUDIBLE].
VERONICA BELMONT: It's disgusting.
FELICIA DAY: I am not Faux-ronica.
VERONICA BELMONT: Who said that?
Oh, you are totally Faux-ronica now.
Yes.
FELICIA DAY: NudesMinion17.
VERONICA BELMONT: We should have a character named
Faux-ronica on one of our shows.
FELICIA DAY: It's not even a good handle.
BONNIE BURTON: NudesMinion?
VERONICA BELMONT: Who should come on and be Veronica's--
[INAUDIBLE]
BONNIE BURTON: Alright, we've babbled enough.
FELICIA DAY: Now let's talk about some of the characters.
If you haven't read this book--
I should've said this earlier.
Dammit.
It's about a girl named Angel who is really white trash.
She is kind of a pill-popper.
And she wakes up in the hospital not
knowing where she is.
And it turns out, she slowly--
she gets a mysterious note, you have to go get this job at
the morgue.
And over the course of the first of the book, she
realizes she's a zombie.
She has to eat brains.
And this mysterious benefactor is helping her survive by
being able to steal the brains from the corpses.
And there's all this underground
zombie stuff going on.
There's also a murderer out there.
So it's kind of procedural, as well as zombie.
And Dave is my favorite comments on the forums, "The
zombies seem more like Skyrim vampires, not turning
monstrous if they stay fed." Thank you for the Skyrim
reference, Dave.
BONNIE BURTON: Wait, there's vampires in Skyrim?
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: I'm totally going to play Skyrim now.
VERONICA BELMONT: The whole idea of--
FELICIA DAY: There's werewolves, too.
VERONICA BELMONT: - [INAUDIBLE] is all
vampire-related scenes.
BONNIE BURTON: Wow.
I was on the fence with the rolls, but now that there's
sweet rolls and vampires.
VERONICA BELMONT: You can be a vampire lord.
FELICIA DAY: You can also adopt arphans.
Did you adopt your orphans?
VERONICA BELMONT: Yes, I did.
BONNIE BURTON: Did you say arphans or orphans?
FELICIA DAY: I said arphans.
BONNIE BURTON: That's what I thought.
VERONICA BELMONT: I went into the world.
I built my stupid house.
FELICIA DAY: It took forever, didn't it?
VERONICA BELMONT: I bought my kids.
And then I left.
And I never went back.
FELICIA DAY: Which kids did you pick?
I picked two girls.
I was like, boys, sorry.
VERONICA BELMONT: I picked a girl and a boy from that
orphanage in Riftin.
FELICIA DAY: I picked up street orphans.
VERONICA BELMONT: Aww, you got street urchins?
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
You guys sound really creepy right now.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I am going to call when adopt a pet now,
they're arphans.
FELICIA DAY: It's OK, I have a barn and a housecarl.
Everybody's taking care of those kids.
They got the run of the house.
OK, what about the story?
VERONICA BELMONT: So I want to say-- well you reminded me--
that the one thing I didn't love is that I was kind of
hoping for something a little more interesting with the
whole mysterious letter writer.
I liked--
what was his name, Marcus?
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: I liked Marcus, I thought
he was an OK guy.
But it seemed a little bit too convenient, I guess.
I was kind of hoping for one of those Charlie's Angels,
except for the vampires.
Or no, zombies.
BONNIE BURTON: You didn't want Bosley, you wanted Charlie?
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: And then She kind of left those two cops
out of the loop.
They seemed like they were going to be interesting parts
of the story, and then they just went nowhere.
But maybe they'll come back in later books, so.
FELICIA DAY: I liked those characters, too.
VERONICA BELMONT: They could have just been establishing
those characters.
Like why is that one detective so pissed off at her all time?
Does he just hate women?
Or just hate girls who are poor?
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, I find that, in many of our books, or
a lot of books like that, especially horror novels where
the woman's the main character, there's a lot of
jerk-ass cops as characters.
I don't know if those authors just got way too many parking
tickets and are just pissed off at cops or what.
FELICIA DAY: I think it's just conflict.
BONNIE BURTON: Where are cops good guys.
They're always jerks or idiots.
FELICIA DAY: But there's never--
[INAUDIBLE]
FELICIA DAY: But with a character that is really nice
to you, and baking cookies and stuff you, unless that guy
dies, it's not interesting, right?
BONNIE BURTON: I don't know.
I think you could do a character that's kind of like
"Forever Night" type chara-- well, he wasn't a cop, though.
I'm trying to think of any romance where it's a
paranormal, where the guy's a cop, but also maybe a vampire
or werewolf.
VERONICA BELMONT: The very first, the one with Alex
Craft, her love interest was--
BONNIE BURTON: Oh right.
OK, yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: But he was a vampire.
Right?
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, there you go.
FELICIA DAY: Yes.
BONNIE BURTON: Okay.
I don't now
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, maybe.
VERONICA BELMONT: Fairy?
He's a fairy?
FELICIA DAY: He's a fairy.
VERONICA BELMONT: He's a fairy.
BONNIE BURTON: Death?
FELICIA DAY: The Alex Craft novels has death, which is
kind of mysterious alternate plane, and then also a fairy.
VERONICA BELMONT: I forgot how much I enjoyed sexy death.
FELICIA DAY: He was so good.
Did you guys read the follow-up?
This last book that just came out a couple of
months ago is amazing.
VERONICA BELMONT: No, because when do you have time to do
all of this reading?
Because you are crazy.
BONNIE BURTON: Felicia reads a book every five minutes.
[INAUDIBLE]
VERONICA BELMONT: I think I've figured it out.
Kiala's to video games, as Felicia is to books, as Bonnie
is too what?
BONNIE BURTON: Booze.
VERONICA BELMONT: Booze?
BONNIE BURTON: Booze.
VERONICA BELMONT: Then what am I?
BONNIE BURTON: Booze, not boobs.
FELICIA DAY: You're tech.
I finished "Dishonored." I finished Dishonored over
Thanksgiving.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Well, it's short.
It's a short game.
It's so good.
It's such a good game.
VERONICA BELMONT: Don't tell me, I'm almost done.
FELICIA DAY: It's not the way I play,
because I strangle everybody.
I make it a career to literally strangle--
I call my characters Sir Blinkin Choken.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I try to be stealthy, but then I just give
up if I have to restart more than once.
And then I start just strangling people.
FELICIA DAY: Oh, I'll restart 45 times.
OK, so let's talk about the characters a little bit.
Danielle from the forums, she really liked Angel because she
was a far cry from the typical heroine in a romance novel,
and thought it was really refreshing.
And Brooke--
Oh, Bonnie had a really nice-- not Bonnie Bonnie-- but Bonnie
from on forum said, "Ultimately the biggest
romance in the book was Angel finding a shred of love for
herself," which I thought was quite poetic.
What did you think about Angel as a main character?

VERONICA BELMONT: Who, us?
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, you guys.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh, are we on?
FELICIA DAY: I'm terrible, guys.
I'm a terrible host.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Is this public?
FELICIA DAY: Shut up.
BONNIE BURTON: Oh, you're not a terrible host, Veronica.
Or, I mean--
VERONICA BELMONT: Is this real life?

FELICIA DAY: Don't call me Veronica.
Come on.
VERONICA BELMONT: Welcome to my life.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I want you all to see what I'm doing here in
honor of the book that we're reading.
BONNIE BURTON: Is that brains?
VERONICA BELMONT: Is that ice?
KIALA KAZEBEE: I just put ice in my white wine.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, girl.
Doin' it Mama Belmont style.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh yeah.
FELICIA DAY: That's white trash
zombie celebration there.
BONNIE BURTON: What would be more white trash is if you had
a crazy straw through a box of wine.
VERONICA BELMONT: Well, this is half a glass of Coca Cola
in my red wine.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Nice.
VERONICA BELMONT: That was a lie.
BONNIE BURTON: I should have got box wine.
I didn't even think of that.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I have my water in a mason jar.

FELICIA DAY: You're really embracing it.
BONNIE BURTON: At Target they sell box wine in mini boxes.
KIALA KAZEBEE: They do.
VERONICA BELMONT: Tiny boxes?
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, like small juice boxes.
VERONICA BELMONT: Wine in tiny boxes.
FELICIA DAY: Like a little juice box?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh my god, how many of those can we buy
for Felicia?
FELICIA DAY: I'm only allowed three.
VERONICA BELMONT: Are we allowed to ship juice box
wines over state lines?
BONNIE BURTON: The ultimate tiny wine.
You know, you can buy wine on Amazon now.
It's not that potent..
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh, our friend who brought you the
tiny wines at DragonCon came to the meet up.
FELICIA DAY: That's cool.
Did he bring the tiny wines in
celebration of my tiny wine-dom?
VERONICA BELMONT: He did not.
He did not.
BONNIE BURTON: Did I bring this up last time, that I
thought we should do wine pairings with our books?
FELICIA DAY: You can.
VERONICA BELMONT: You told it to me.
BONNIE BURTON: Okay.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I haven't heard that.
FELICIA DAY: I don't know anything about wine.
I just order white or red.
And I never order red, so I just order white.
BONNIE BURTON: Well maybe for the next episode, I'll do
something on Goodreads, and maybe people can also suggest
wines for previous books.
FELICIA DAY: Okay.
That's a really good idea.
VERONICA BELMONT: That is fun.
BONNIE BURTON: And book pairing.
And then when people buy stuff on Amazon, they can
buy wine with it.
VERONICA BELMONT: That's a good idea.
I like it.
FELICIA DAY: I saw a lot of red wine on Twitter, people
said there were girding their loins with red wine.
I saw many, many--
not all gird-loining.
Loin-girding?
But anyways, a bunch of people said they are drinking red
wine to celebrate tonight.
VERONICA BELMONT: We have a quote from Marjorie Quinn, who
says they have a box of wine that looks like a purse.
A designer purse!
I want that.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I've seen that.
I've seen that.
VERONICA BELMONT: You've seen that?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah.
It's got a wine bladder.
And it-- that always sounds weird, but
VERONICA BELMONT: A wine bladder?
I've got a wine bladder right now.
Excuse me.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Actually, that's what the mason jar is
for, so I don't have to leave.
For peeing.
That's for peeing.
VERONICA BELMONT: We've derailed.
FELICIA DAY: Wow, we've derailed so hard.
BONNIE BURTON: Do you have questions from our
viewers, or were we--
FELICIA DAY: Well, we have plenty to talk about.
But, yeah, if we have any questions.
Let's just talk a little bit about the character.
BONNIE BURTON: Okay.
Bring it.
FELICIA DAY: What did we think about--
Katie, what did you guys think about the way Angel handled
the abusive relationships in her life, and if they
contributed to the white trash stereotype, or if the title
mainly referred to her education level and physical
appearance.
So was it a cultural thing, or--?
BONNIE BURTON: Or a domestic violence thing?
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, because it was very scary, that scene.
BONNIE BURTON: With her dad?
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, but I think she actually came out on
top at the end of the dad situation, at least.
I think she really matured by the end of the book, and
figured out a way to protect herself, while still--

I'm kind of forgetting exactly how it ended with them.
Because I finished this book first this month.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Didn't she put him up against the wall?
She [INAUDIBLE]
VERONICA BELMONT: She did rough him up a little bit.
FELICIA DAY: There was a scene at the end of the book where
she goes back.
She talked to him on the phone.
And she also goes back.
There's one last scene where she resolves that situation.
I like the way she dealt with Randy, the boyfriend, who was
such a loser.
I thought it was kind of interesting that--
It's a lot of growth for her character to go through, but I
thought it was a really great arc.
Because she decided to change her life, versus letting the
world change her.
And I thought that was really a great
proactive hero of a book.
VERONICA BELMONT: It kind of sucked that she even had to
stay dependent on the dude up, until the very end, like she's
going to leave him when she's going over to Marcus's house,
and you're assuming she's probably going to stay there
for a while, instead of living in her car.
And I'm not saying she should live in her car.
But I guess she didn't have much of an option.
But [INAUDIBLE]
well [INAUDIBLE].
KIALA KAZEBEE: I wish she would have any female friends.
BONNIE BURTON: That bugged me, too.
FELICIA DAY: There was one at the corner office, the one
girl, right?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah, the blond lady.
FELICIA DAY: But Tearing Up My Heart from the chat says,
"Question, did you find the end of the book predictable or
not anti-climactic?" And I agree, because I don't think
that the romance was built up enough to really be excited
about them getting together.
You're kind of excited for her, but I didn't really get a
sense of Marcus as a character, where I was like,
yes, this guy's a win.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, I didn't get invested, either.
VERONICA BELMONT: I liked the other guy better.
The one she killed.
No, she scared him off.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, that's it.
Spoiler.
VERONICA BELMONT: Wait, they're supposed to
have read the book.
FELICIA DAY: I know, you're right.
VERONICA BELMONT: We don't have to talk spoilers.
FELICIA DAY: We don't do spoilers at all.
Anyway, Emily from the forum said, "Her relationship with
Randy rings true for anybody with low self-esteem in a
relationship.
He was all she thought she deserved." And it was funny
that she had to die in order to get some
self-respect, right?
BONNIE BURTON: Yup.
Which is actually pretty standard for a lot of books
when the main character dies.
No, not in real life.
FELICIA DAY: I was going to say, after death, I'm going to
get self-esteem?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yay.
I have something to look forward to.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, You get self-esteem.
You come into your own.
You're not a wallflower anymore.
You learn about your bravery and talents, and all this
stuff comes out.
It's almost like an outline for a lot of
the books we've read.
Or in books I've read, like a lot of horror romance, where--
especially vampire stuff.
It's always--
KIALA KAZEBEE: Or Catwoman.
It's always like the wallflower--
FELICIA DAY: Catwoman is great.
BONNIE BURTON: She goes undead, and she's never lived
life before until she was dead.
It's that kind of thing.
VERONICA BELMONT: I want superpowers.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah, me too.
FELICIA DAY: That's random.
What superpower would you want?
VERONICA BELMONT: I don't know.
I want to be super strong, or fast, or I don't know.
BONNIE BURTON: Really?
FELICIA DAY: What would be the practical
application of that, Veronica?
What would you really need to use super strength for?
VERONICA BELMONT: Like opening jars and stuff.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, but you could accidentally break doors
all the time.
FELICIA DAY: Always.
VERONICA BELMONT: Wouldn't it be fun to have a superpower,
or even just be a really, really good athlete?
FELICIA DAY: I would want to know every language.
VERONICA BELMONT: That would be really good one.
BONNIE BURTON: No, then you'd know that everyone was
actually was talking about you.
FELICIA DAY: Well, I wouldn't want to read their minds,
because that's just like the internet.
VERONICA BELMONT: That's like reading YouTube comments, but
all the time.
You'd have YouTube comments in your brain.
BONNIE BURTON: I want superpowers that are useful.
I want to be able to tele-transport annoying people
out of my neighborhood back to the marina, or something.
Or make people instantly fall asleep.
I would be the human loopy.
VERONICA BELMONT: That was you doing that to me?
BONNIE BURTON: No, it's good, right?
Because then when you have drunk people on the corner,
they instantly go to sleep.
And they probably have the best sleep they've ever had.
And your neighborhood would finally be quiet.
And you could put people to sleep.
Like if you're having a boring date, you could just snap your
fingers and he'd fall asleep at the table, and you could
just leave.
VERONICA BELMONT: I'd want to fight really well.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I'd want to fight really well.
Or I'd love to be able to play any instrument.
FELICIA DAY: Oh yeah, that'd be a good one.
But fighting?
You'd get arrested if you fight everybody.
VERONICA BELMONT: I want to be good at something.
BONNIE BURTON: If you could play any instrument, you'd be
Prince, Kiala.
FELICIA DAY: You don't want to be Prince.
KIALA KAZEBEE: No, I don't want to be Prince.
FELICIA DAY: Veronica, you're good at something.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I just want to be popular at parties.
VERONICA BELMONT: I don't have a really good skill.
BONNIE BURTON: You are popular at parties, what are you
talking about?
VERONICA BELMONT: I can do weird double-jointed things.
BONNIE BURTON: Oh, me too.
I can do that.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I can do this.
Can you do this?
VERONICA BELMONT: No, but I can do that.
BONNIE BURTON: Look how far my fingers go back.
FELICIA DAY: I have no finger skills.
BONNIE BURTON: I can do this thing, too,
where it does the weird--
VERONICA BELMONT: Hitchiker's thumb
FELICIA DAY: No, I can't do anything.
I can snap really well, though.
[SNAPS FINGERS]
VERONICA BELMONT: Damn.
Right, girl.
BONNIE BURTON: Look at that.
Look at those tendons..
VERONICA BELMONT: Snap.
FELICIA DAY: Are we doing a book club?
KIALA KAZEBEE: OK.
VERONICA BELMONT: Clam-shell tongue.
FELICIA DAY:What other comments.
Let's just talk about zombies in general.
Vicki, who leads all of our extra Hangouts, if you want to
hang out with other people, she leads one for each of the
books in the month, where you can log on and do this with
other members of a forum.
It's really cool.
She's awesome.
And she started to a thread about the state of the zombie.
"There's a trend to humanize and
romanticize monsters in fiction.
Vampires, werewolves and now zombies." Others she's OK
with, but zombies she cannot get onboard with.
BONNIE BURTON: Is it because of the cannibal thing?
FELICIA DAY: Because of the gross you're rotting thing.
I mean, have you seen a belly button?
That's the worst--
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah.
Oh, god.
VERONICA BELMONT: I would not want to rot.
I had strep on my face.
Did I tell you guys this?
I was almost a zombie.
BONNIE BURTON: What?
FELICIA DAY: What?
VERONICA BELMONT: I had strep on my face.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh my god.
VERONICA BELMONT: And I thought I was going to have my
face melt off, but then I got on antibiotics and I was OK.
FELICIA DAY: When was this?
KIALA KAZEBEE: I've had MRSA.
I've had that.
FELICIA DAY: Wait, what's MRSA?
BONNIE BURTON: That's scary.
VERONICA BELMONT: They thought I was going to get MRSA.
And then I didn't.
But you did.
FELICIA DAY: I don't know what MRSA is?
What is that, is that like Mensa?
KIALA KAZEBEE: No, it's staph.
KIALA KAZEBEE: It's like a really--
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, it's staph.
KIALA KAZEBEE: --really, really virulent staph.
VERONICA BELMONT: It's like the really bad kind
that can kill you.
So I had it stuck on my face, but it wasn't MRSA.
BONNIE BURTON: So, the closest I have to a zombie friend is
Jane Wiedlin from The Go-Go's, when she fell off a side of a
cliff with her lightsaber in the dark-- which was an
interesting story.
She miscalculated where the cliff was, and she fell.
And she ripped up her kneecap so much that they had to take
a tendon from a corpse and put it on her kneecap.
And apparently that is standard practice.
No joke.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Did they take the tendon
from a serial killer?
Because that's what always happens.
BONNIE BURTON: I hope so
VERONICA BELMONT: And does the tendon now
try to murder people?
BONNIE BURTON: She dances on people's graves.
No, I don't know.
FELICIA DAY: That's awful.
BONNIE BURTON: That's pretty standard.
Apparently, that's what you do when you
need tendons or something.
FELICIA DAY: I would visit the family of somebody that gave
me a heart, but I guess a knee tendon, then you don't have to
send a card or anything, right?
BONNIE BURTON: I would want to know.
What if they were professional flamenco dancers or something?
FELICIA DAY: Oh, that would be a high quality tendon.
Or maybe low quality, because it was over-used.
BONNIE BURTON: Oh.
Right.
OK, maybe not.
VERONICA BELMONT: So Sabine in the chat room says, "Tendons
have no blood flow, little to no risk of rejection.
It's awesome."
BONNIE BURTON: Cool.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Just like me.
[INAUDIBLE]
FELICIA DAY: OK, Douglas York from the chat says, "What did
you think about Nick's evolution from being an
arrogant show-off suck-up to buying her a
new watch to be nice?
And what about Angel's reaction where she was almost
annoyed that he was nice?" Which I thought it was great.
I really liked that character.
In fact, I thought they were going to get
together, and not Marcus.
Because Marcus was totally mysterious the whole time.
VERONICA BELMONT: I bet he's going to become like her
helper at the morgue at some point.
FELICIA DAY: So he'll find out about her being a zombie?
VERONICA BELMONT: Maybe.
FELICIA DAY: Guys, just think about it.
She started rotting.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I know, that smell.
VERONICA BELMONT: But she got better.
BONNIE BURTON: Okay, let's break it down.
BONNIE BURTON: Wait , wait, let's back up.
Let's break it down a bit.
So let's think of the smell here.
KIALA KAZEBEE: She springs.
BONNIE BURTON: From a Grateful Dead fan to a
stoner who never bathes.
Oh wait, that's same thing.

VERONICA BELMONT: There goes our core
audience of Dead stoners.

BONNIE BURTON: I don't know, I've dated some pretty smelly
guys before, that didn't really stop me.
FELICIA DAY: Really?
VERONICA BELMONT: I've dated a lot of punk rock guys.
They got a little ripe.
BONNIE BURTON: Punk guys don't bathe.
KIALA KAZEBEE: No.
[INAUDIBLE]
VERONICA BELMONT: It's less that they don't bathe.
It's that they don't wash their jeans ever.
So their jeans get that smell.
KIALA KAZEBEE: No, my boyfriend was
in a punk rock band.
And he is very clean, and has always been very clean.
BONNIE BURTON: Wait a minute, is he a guy in a stable
relationship?
VERONICA BELMONT: Not punk enough.
BONNIE BURTON: Not punk.
FELICIA DAY: There was a guy in college I really wanted to
date, but I couldn't get over the fact that he did not wash
his hair enough.
BONNIE BURTON: Did you break with him?
FELICIA DAY: No, I never went out with him.
VERONICA BELMONT: That's a deal-breaker, ladies.

FELICIA DAY: Sorry.
BONNIE BURTON: Well here's the other thing.
I was thinking the whole time, and I think about this a lot
of when I read vampire novels, even though vampires and
zombies don't technically breathe, they must have the
worst breath ever.
VERONICA BELMONT: I hate stinky breath the most of
everything.
FELICIA DAY: Me too.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I get paranoid about having it.
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh, me too.
BONNIE BURTON: Let's say you have your wisdom
teeth pulled, right?
Remember how bad that breath smells because
it's all blood breath?
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, because you
get the cotton thing.
The cottons in the back.
And stinky.
BONNIE BURTON: No, that's--
VERONICA BELMONT: What are they called?
Not abscess?
Is it abscess?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: It's something like that.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Or dry socket.
VERONICA BELMONT: Dry socket.
I got dry sockets.
FELICIA DAY: Why are we talking about this?
KIALA KAZEBEE: I don't know.
VERONICA BELMONT: We're going to talk about all the ways
we're disintegrating.
BONNIE BURTON: The only problem with zombie sex that I
keep thinking, it's a bad thing.
You can't really have rough sex with a zombie.
You can't even do the fingernails down the back
because then you get all their--
[MOANS]
FELICIA DAY: Stop it, Bonnie.
KIALA KAZEBEE: That reminded me of Cabin Fever.
Did you guys see that movie?
VERONICA BELMONT: No!
Shut up!
Shut up!

KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh, the sex scene.
FELICIA DAY: So here's the thing.
That's what I was distracted the whole book about.
The logistics of that.
And the fact that if she burned energy, she basically
is eating through brains.
So every time she got excited, I was like, don't have any
relations with that man.
You're going to burn a man's brain.
I didn't like it.
BONNIE BURTON: I don't know, sometimes I feel like we
[INAUDIBLE]
VERONICA BELMONT: Okay, so we didn't like some
of the zombie physics.
FELICIA DAY: No, we loved it.
It's just if you think about it too deep, I can't find it
to be romantic in any way, because she's dead.
And somebody should put her in a grave, okay?
KIALA KAZEBEE: And in order for them to have safe zombie
sex, they're going to have to eat brains right before.
VERONICA BELMONT: Felicia has shown her anti-zombie stance.
FELICIA DAY: I'm sorry.
I would be anti-zombie if it were like "Alien Nation." but
it was on zombies.
I would be like, get back.
Remember that show?
VERONICA BELMONT: Not all zombies are gross, like in
"Dearly Departed."
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
And "Warm Bodies." Did you guys see the trailer for "Warm
Bodies?" Because that looked really cute.
FELICIA DAY: Well, "Two Weeks' Notice," also,
is by Rachel Caine.
We read her other series that you guys didn't quite like.
It was one of her first books about the weather wardens.
But she has a really cool book called "Two Weeks' Notice,"
where it's kind of similar.
She's also a zombie, too, but for some reason, she was
fresher than this zombie.
She kind of avoided the whole rotting thing.
That made it a little bit more-- the romance was a
little bit more satisfying for me.
I enjoyed this book.
It's just when you think too closely about the zombie
stuff, it makes you want to vomit a little bit.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Maybe if she just said undead instead of
zombie, I might be able to get more--
BONNIE BURTON: What was that Brandon Routh movie where he
plays a paranormal investigator.
With Brandon Routh?
Do you know what I'm talking about?
Oh, I can't remember the name of it.
But his best friend in it is a zombie, and they go to a body
parts shop.
And it's actually pretty funny, because then you find
out where zombies go to shop for new parts.
And then they get it sewn on them.
So when their other parts are worn out, they go to this
place called the Body Shop, and they get new parts.
FELICIA DAY: Oh, that's cool.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, it's really clever.
But Brandon Routh?
The vegan from "Scott Pilgrim?"
KIALA KAZEBEE: Superman.
BONNIE BURTON: Superman.
I can't remember the name of the movie.
It's going to drive me crazy, because I bet you everyone on
Twitter is tweeting about me right now.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, they're angry.
BONNIE BURTON: Well if it's on Netflix streaming, so just
look him up on Netflix streaming.
Oh, "Dylan Dog." That's what it's called. "Dylan Dog."
FELICIA DAY: I didn't see it.
I don't see any of those movies.
Barry White from the--
I don't know if it's the real Barry White-- but he said he
had is ACL replaced and they just used this hamstring.
They used his own hamstring for his ACL.
BONNIE BURTON: Well, if they don't use yours, they can use
a corpse hamstring.
FELICIA DAY: I wouldn't request that.
I'd rather use my own.
BONNIE BURTON: I'm going to get a corpse one.
That'd be cool.
FELICIA DAY: All right, before we move on to "Dearly
Departed," which is our alt pick, let's do our casting.
BONNIE BURTON: Oh right.
VERONICA BELMONT: I'm not good at this game.
I can't do it.
FELICIA DAY: It's the best game, Veronica.
VERONICA BELMONT: I'm the worst at this game.
FELICIA DAY: All right, I picked-- does anybody know
Brea Grant?
Who is actually a friend of mine?
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, she's awesome.
FELICIA DAY: She would be an amazing Angel.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Who's that
FELICIA DAY: She's the tiniest, cutest
little blonde girl.
BONNIE BURTON: She was the blond girl on "Heroes."
[INAUDIBLE]
FELICIA DAY: Yes.
Speedster.
BONNIE BURTON: Speedster on "Heroes."
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, she was good.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I don't remember.
FELICIA DAY: And then my Marcus would be Enver Gjokaj,
who I know as well.
I don't even know if that's how you pronounce his last
name, but it's Enver from "Dollhouse."
VERONICA BELMONT: Which was he on "Dollhouse."
KIALA KAZEBEE: Which on was he on "Dollhouse?"
FELICIA DAY: He was the one who had the Russian accent
sometimes, when he was [INAUDIBLE] dolls.
VERONICA BELMONT: Victor.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Victor
VERONICA BELMONT: Victor.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh, he's on "Dexter."
VERONICA BELMONT: Weirdly, his name was also Victor in
"Dexter."
KIALA KAZEBEE: On "Dexter." Yeah, I kind of thought the
same thing.
VERONICA BELMONT: And I I thought his name this Victor.
KIALA KAZEBEE: He's just always Victor.
FELICIA DAY: No, Enver.
That's him.
VERONICA BELMONT: I just assumed his name is Victor in
everything.
BONNIE BURTON: He can only play Victors.
[INAUDIBLE]
KIALA KAZEBEE: He was amazing in "Dollhouse."
FELICIA DAY: He's a very good actor.
BONNIE BURTON: He was a guest on Nikita or something and he
did the Russian accent for that, too.
FELICIA DAY: He's a really good actor.
So those are my picks for casting this.
Anybody have any--
I know it's kind of a cliche, because she's already blond,
but I think she's just adorable.
And she kind of looks like the cover art, too.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, I just was actually was picturing the
girl on the cover art.
Because it's such a captivating image.
FELICIA DAY: It's great cover art.
Diana Rowland has some of the best cover art out there.
She and Anne Aguare Agare I don't know.
Vaginal sci-fi.
We did as an alt a several months ago.
But it's some of the best cover art.
Because it doesn't make you feel like you're reading a
romance novel.
It's just really adventure.
And it has a romance in it, but it's just
a really good story.
BONNIE BURTON: It looks like it should be a trade
paperback-- or, trade comic.
Like trade comic paperback.
KIALA KAZEBEE: There's actually a girl that I know
who lives here in Portland.
She's really active in the geek community.
Her name's Mare Monroe.
And she looks just like this.
Do you know her, Bonnie?
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: That's kind of how what's her
face looks right now.
The teeny bopper singer.
FELICIA DAY: Oh, Ke$ha?
VERONICA BELMONT: No.
BONNIE BURTON: No, what's her toes that was a singer.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Robyn?
FELICIA DAY: Oh, Miley Cyrus.
VERONICA BELMONT: Miley Cyrus.
Yeah, she could play her.
VERONICA BELMONT: Or Pink.
Pink has the same haircut, too.
BONNIE BURTON: I kept thinking Pink the whole time.
VERONICA BELMONT: Pink?
FELICIA DAY: Oh, Pink.
Yeah, you're right.
BONNIE BURTON: Just because her attitude is very much like
the girl in the book.
And kick ass.
I just liked her in it.
But guys, it's like, ugh I need to start
watching more stuff.
I actually thought the dude that plays Arrow.
I just thought of him.
I've been thinking about him.
FELICIA DAY: Oh yeah.
Do you like that show?
BONNIE BURTON: I do, I really like it.
You should watch it.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, I just started watching it based on
your recommendation.
FELICIA DAY: I've watched it.
I've kind of fell off the last couple of episodes.
VERONICA BELMONT: A little cheesy.
BONNIE BURTON: It is.
I'm with you.
VERONICA BELMONT: But it's got some good casting coming up.
FELICIA DAY: Oh yeah, they do.
Oh my god, John Barrowman.
True story, I tried to meet him at DragonCon, and I just
stood awkwardly in front of his table for--
VERONICA BELMONT: Not who I'm talking about.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I know who you're talking about.
FELICIA DAY: Oh now, who's coming on?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Guess.
FELICIA DAY: Spoiler.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Who would Veronica be excited--
FELICIA DAY: Oh yeah.
Really?
I didn't know he was going to be on that.
BONNIE BURTON: Wait, who
VERONICA BELMONT: Shut up.
Nothing.
Move on.
I'm blocking this whole thing.
KIALA KAZEBEE: We'll tell you in the chat.
BONNIE BURTON: Wait, no.
Back up.
You can't exclude me.
Don't make this--
VERONICA BELMONT: No, we'll talk about it later!
KIALA KAZEBEE: I'll chat it.
FELICIA DAY: We'll IM it to you.
Everybody in the chat just screamed 10,000 "Dylan Dog,"
by the way.
So thank you, everybody.
All right, let's move on.
to our alt pick this month, which was Dearly Departed.

FELICIA DAY: How did find this book?
And what is it about?
"Dearly Departed," by Lia Habel--
I hope I'm saying her name correctly--
is kind of like a future alternate history, where the
world has basically gone to crap.
And different tribes from all over North
America and Central America.
Basically, the world has compressed into parts of
Central America and northern South America, I guess, for
lack of a better way to describe it.
And they've taken over the ideals of Victorian England,
or at least the larger amount of the
population in that region.
And they call it New Victoria.
And so then there is an opposing force called the
Punks, who are a little more averse to technology, and that
flamboyance displayed by the Victorian era.
And so they're more little more steampunk-y, a little
more like DIY kind of society.
But basically there's a zombie outbreak, and these two forces
are secretly working together to combat to the zombies that
are trying to take over.
However, there's certain zombies--
another ice cube, please--
certain zombies can be saved from basically going crazy,
and going mad, and losing control over their minds and
their impulses.
And so the main character, Nora, her father is the one
who helps figure this out.
And he's working on a vaccine to cure it.
And I don't want to go through the entire plot, but one of
the main zombies, Bram, who's working on this opposition
force against the bad zombies, is like a really sweet dude.
And Nora and Bram are like the love that cannot be, they
cannot be together because it is a zombie and a human girl.
But it's so cute.
I loved their little romance.
And Bram was so sweet.
I just wanted to hug him until his little nose fell off.
BONNIE BURTON: Oh, Felicia.
VERONICA BELMONT: I liked it.
This book started slow for me, and then by the end, it got
really exciting.
And I thought she did a great job with the action scenes,
and a great job with the descriptions.
And I loved the development of Pamela as a character, and how
she went from being the timid sidekick, to really being a
true ass kicker.
And kind of coming into our own.
And even her brother, who was such a pain the ass.
I'm curious to see how his story line progresses.
But I loved Bram.
I loved Bram.
I thought he was so sweet.
And I thought Nora was cool.
And at first I was annoyed by the change in the voice, by
the characters jumping around.
But I, overall, I thought it was probably my favorite pick
of the month, of this month.
Not ever.
Not my favorite pick ever.
Just out of the two books, I think I liked it better.
And I can tell you do not agree with me, my evil twin.
BONNIE BURTON: I loved it.
FELICIA DAY: What?
Bonnie's going.
Bonnie, go.
Bonnie, go.
BONNIE BURTON: I loved it.
This is the first book I really liked that didn't have
any sex in it.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yay.
I did something right.
BONNIE BURTON: No, I really like it.
I got into it right away.
I'm a big fan of futuristic books, but they take
principles from Victoriana.
Which is steampunk-y, in a way, I guess.
But I really liked the way that they described the
technology.
The worldbuilding was super cool.
I really got into that.
I could visualize it, which is hard for me to do, because I'm
a little ADD, so I will read something over and over again
if I get bored, just because I'm not paying attention.
And I paid attention throughout this whole book.
I didn't have to re-read anything.
That could just be my dyslexia, too.
But anyway, I really like the book.
I liked the characters.
I totally got into it.
There were times I yelled at the book because I was pissed
off about what was going on.
And that's a good indicator that you're doing good
writing, if I care enough to yell at a book.
Even though there was no hot and steamy sexy times, I
really liked the sexual tension between the two.
It did weird me out a little, because everyone was so young.
VERONICA BELMONT: They're in their late teens.
Bram was like 18-ish.
BONNIE BURTON: Every time I'm sexually attracted to a young
character in a book, I feel really creepy.
FELICIA DAY: Lisa Marsh, from the chat says exactly that
same thing, "Did anyone else feel dirty crushing on Bram?"
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: And actually, we can talk about this more
when we're doing the casting, but I thought of the new actor
that plays Q. I thought of him as Bram.
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh, that's really good.
He was in "Cloud Atlas," too.
He's great.
BONNIE BURTON: So the whole time, I didn't want to think
of any young adult actors necessarily, because that gets
into scary territory mode for me.
I don't want to go into Zac Efron mode or something.
VERONICA BELMONT: That's a great casting.
BONNIE BURTON: I wanted to know who that would be.
But anyway, yeah, I was thinking of
new Q the whole time.
And I just really liked it.
And I thought that the female characters were really
interesting.
I liked the female zombie.
I thought she was super cool.
VERONICA BELMONT: Chaz.
BONNIE BURTON: Chaz.
I would totally be Chaz.
I would be the zombie who that was like, screw it, I'm going
to dye my hair pink and purple, and I'm going to tease
all the boys.
I'm going to date another zombie.
I would totally be that girl.
She was awesome.
It was fun to be able to identify with someone I liked.
It was fun to see a romance blossom, even though nothing
really happened physically, and it was just sweet.
VERONICA BELMONT: He did bite her.
That was kind of hot.
BONNIE BURTON: That was hot.
VERONICA BELMONT: When he bit her in the shoulder.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, it was.
VERONICA BELMONT: It was kind of hot.
BONNIE BURTON: But I have to say, I guess for this month we
have to replace the blush-o-meter for Felicia with
a barf-o-meter.
FELICIA DAY: OK, Kiala, did you read this book?
KIALA KAZEBEE: I haven't finished it, but I
read a lot of it.
And I actually really liked it.
But I like that world.
I'm a sucker for any kind of Victorian
romance no matter what.
Like even Neil Stephenson's "The Diamond Age."
FELICIA DAY: That's one of my favorite books.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah.
So for me, it was like that but light, and
obviously with zombies.
So any time I'm in that world, I'll get sucked right in.
It doesn't matter what the story is.
I'll just start reading.
But I really liked Nora.
And I liked Bram.
And I'm really enjoying it, and I'm going to finish it
because I liked it so much.
FELICIA DAY: Guys, this is the first book I did not want--
I could not finish it.
I lemmed it.
VERONICA BELMONT: You lemmed it?
FELICIA DAY: I'm sorry, I lemmed it.
I did.
I'm sorry.
I'm going to try to read it all the way because you say it
gets better.
I couldn't do it guys, I'm sorry.
VERONICA BELMONT: Why?
FELICIA DAY: I did not find the world--
My theory about steampunk is that steampunk allows us to go
back to Victoriana, and as women, justify our love for
it, because we don't have to remember how crappy it was for
women back then.
It basically gives us everything we want to out of
there, and pretty clothes.
So that's my theory about steampunk.
So when we're going to the future, and saying that,
somehow, only steampunk survived, and just the
worldbuilding was very weird for me.
I could not grasp why this would have actually evolved
the way that it evolved.
And then, I just wanted to burn Nora to death.

VERONICA BELMONT: You really are my evil twin.
FELICIA DAY: I know.
We're opposite.
There was some very good writing.
I felt like the plotting was really good.
I had a problem with basic premises of
worldbuilding and plot.
I just didn't understand why the dad was
treated the way he was.
I just had a problem basically--
VERONICA BELMONT: Can I ask how far you got?
FELICIA DAY: I got maybe a third of the way in.
So maybe I should just keep plugging away.
VERONICA BELMONT: I think you should keep going, because,
like I said, it was a real slog in the beginning for me.
It was giving a hard time to keep my attention.
And I actually picked up another book in that time, and
I was like, maybe I'll go back to it, maybe I won't.
But I have to read this one since it's my pick.
So I went back to it, and then I got into it, and I was like,
oh this is actually OK.
Right.
Yeah.
I like this.
And I think you should give it another go.
Or just try to get halfway through and see how
you feel about it.
FELICIA DAY: I'll try.
I know a lot of people on the forums had problems.
OK, it was completely--
this was is the most divisive month, because a ton of people
loved the first book.
And some really didn't like it.
So there were a lot of strong love and hate on "White Trash
Zombie." And this one is the exact same thing.
People either love-loved it or did not like it.
Nobody was like, meh, it was OK.
It was very strong feelings.
And maybe the fact that the beginning is kind of slow,
that's my camp.
And the multiple points of view were hard for me, because
I didn't really care about anyone.
And there were so many multiple point of view, I just
didn't understand why I was going from so many points of
view, and I still didn't understand what's going on.
BONNIE BURTON: I have to agree.
I have to agree a little bit on that.
I thought there was a few too many point of views.
I could care less about that sergeant guy.
I don't care.
VERONICA BELMONT: Wolf?
BONNIE BURTON: And honestly, I didn't care about the dad.
FELICIA DAY: Yes, I was confused.
BONNIE BURTON: But I was totally down with knowing what
was going on with Pam.
Because Pam was going through a bunch of crap.
And then I really cared about what Bram and Nora
thought, for sure.
And I kind of would have liked to see Chaz.
Like, one of the zombies.
VERONICA BELMONT: Like a Chaz point of view?
FELICIA DAY: She was a cool character, yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: I wanted to see what was going on through
their heads, as far as like, hey, who's this human that's
here, and what the hell.
And I am with you on that, I thought there were a little
bit too many points of view.
The thing with the world building on this, I can
understand why they went back to this Victoriana principal
KIALA KAZEBEE: Victoria principal.
BONNIE BURTON: Oh, nice.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I love her.
I love her wind commercials.
Or, no, she does the skin care.
I don't know.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
I have a good Dallas joke.
Anyway, I understand why that happened, because they went
through such chaos.
And the world was pretty much been obliterated
as they knew it.
But sometimes, you have to go from rock bottom and then, in
a way to keep your sanity, to keep everyone from killing
each other, you come up with these stupid rules from
yesteryear that seem to make sense.
Kind of like how we all love Victoriana stuff.
You sort of forget that there were plagues, and--
FELICIA DAY: It was not good times, guys.
BONNIE BURTON: It was not good times.
Even if you think of the 1950s or '40s, we romanticize a lot
of decades that had a lot of bad crap that happened, with
racism, and sexism, and horrible health scares, and
horrible wars.
FELICIA DAY: And that's what's great about steampunk, is that
it reinvents that era, so we get the things that we have
nostalgia about.
BONNIE BURTON: I don't think this was a
steampunk book, though.
I honestly think it was just--
there was tech there, clearly.
There was modern-day tech.
FELICIA DAY: I would've been better without all the-- even
Jenn on the forum said, "The world made me saddest.
Two hundred years in the future, but women's rights
have regressed 300 years back." That's maybe what I was
bored about.
BONNIE BURTON: If you look at a lot of post-apocalyptic
fiction, like if you look at "Y, The Last Man Standing." If
you read
FELICIA DAY: True.
Yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: All women [INAUDIBLE]
treat each other like crap.
KIALA KAZEBEE: And "The Diamond Age" was entirely
about her rescuing all those girls from prostitution.
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
Tank Girl, same thing.
I think it just depends on what you want out of a book,
especially steampunk.
Because, steampunk, everyone has their own idea of what
they think the perfect steampunk novel is.
I loved "Iron Duke." I thought that was great.
FELICIA DAY: The third one in that series is so good, guys.
It's so much even better than "Iron Duke."
BONNIE BURTON: Well, I like that world, too.
But I can sort of understand why they did it.
I don't agree with it.
I would be that girl that would
constantly get in trouble.
I would not last long in an all-girl school.
[INAUDIBLE]
Are you kidding?
They'd kick me out in a minute because I'd be
fighting all the time.
So, yeah, I'm not a big fan of keeping women in their place,
and talk only when you're spoken to,
and all of that crap.
FELICIA DAY: But what is that--
What do you see the mechanic of that?
Why to the futuristic--
Because sci-fi has a lot of empowered characters.
So when we go into this nihilistic world, why do you
think that--
would it really happen that we refer to more traditional, or
historical, sex roles?
VERONICA BELMONT: Well we could get into a really heated
political discussion about that right.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I would think it have a lot to do with how
the apocalypse came about, and who was in power.
And it might make sense if--
Well, let's say the apocalypse had to do with a religious
war, like a jihad or something.
Or if the apocalypse came about
because we all got gonorrhea.

Something like that.
FELICIA DAY: My MRSA.
VERONICA BELMONT: MRSA.
We'll all just get MRSA.
KIALA KAZEBEE: We all get MRSA.
KIALA KAZEBEE: But that might create this kind of backlash
with everybody deciding.
And then also, if we have an apocalypse where we don't have
electricity, it makes sense to look back to the steam era, to
use that as a way to create the kind of tech that we need,
but with a different fuel.
BONNIE BURTON: And the punks didn't follow that rule.
It was mostly the new Victorians that followed it
not the punks.
So we need to remember that there two types of world
building in this book alone.
So it wasn't just one kind of culture.
But yeah, it bugged me too.
The feminist in me is always like, ugh I
hate books like this.
But then you see that the main characters screw with that
whole idea of rules, throw it out the window, and then
become something better.
So in a way, it's a means to an end.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
No, that's interesting.
I'm going to pick it back up again, I think.
Especially the multiple point of view, I think, that if I
had to name one thing.
World-building inconsistencies or confusions aside, I think
it was the multiple point of view.
When I got to the final part, I'm just like, no, I don't
want to know.
I don't want to see the world through this guy's eyes.
I just want to know what happens to the main
characters.
And it works.
BONNIE BURTON: You know what, just skip the people you don't
want to look at.
FELICIA DAY: Sometimes I do that in "Game of Thrones," the
first time I read them.
I'm like I don't care what's going on in the north, and
then I get confused.
And then I gotta go back.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I do that, too.
I'm like, wait, this isn't Arya.
This isn't Sansa.
I don't care.

FELICIA DAY: Yeah, Aria is the only one that I'm like, I read
every word.
Every word.
A lot of people were
KIALA KAZEBEE: Veronica.
FELICIA DAY: What?
What's your problem?
KIALA KAZEBEE: You will read ever chapter.
Those words are gold.
VERONICA BELMONT: Don't pretend you don't like it.

BONNIE BURTON: Don't make real Veronica angry.
FELICIA DAY: I'm not taking donations to
grow my bangs out.
Thanks.
BONNIE BURTON: Aw, she's got bangs.
VERONICA BELMONT: That is terrible.
FELICIA DAY: Welcome to the internet.
VERONICA BELMONT: Equal opportunity banging, OK?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Nice.
BONNIE BURTON: That's our new tag-line.
Equal opportunity banging.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Put that into the song.
The theme song.
FELICIA DAY: On the forums, several people were
annoyed with Nora.
She said because she kept passing out like Nancy Drew.
But Bram was one of the favorite characters.
I think of those books, Bram was the favorite character of
the forums in general.
And he was nice.
BONNIE BURTON: He was nice.
He held her hand.
VERONICA BELMONT: He was so sweet.
He just wanted to like her.
BONNIE BURTON: He wanted to cuddle.
He was a cuddle zombie.
FELICIA DAY: Ew, he's rotting.
Why would you want them to cuddle?
BONNIE BURTON: He did not smell.
You didn't read the book, remember?
FELICIA DAY: I read the book.
I know we would [INAUDIBLE]
He's clammy.
VERONICA BELMONT: Sometimes people get clammy.
BONNIE BURTON: And [INAUDIBLE] don't have that bacteria,
rotty smell.
They probably smell like normal, teenage boys, which
probably smell kind of bad anyways.
VERONICA BELMONT: He was chivalrous.
FELICIA DAY: OK, I'll give you that one.

OK.
What books have you actually-- because this is literally one
of the first books I've stopped
reading, and I read anything.
And I will go back and read it, but it's very rare.
What other books have you guys recently-- and this was a big
thread on the forum, too.
BONNIE BURTON: That we stopped reading?
VERONICA BELMONT: Just for little background, we have a
verb for that.
And that is to lem.
FELICIA DAY: Lem.
That's why I used it.
BONNIE BURTON: Why is it called to lem?
VERONICA BELMONT: You don't know about lemming?
BONNIE BURTON: Like, lemming?
VERONICA BELMONT: No.
It comes from us Stanislaw Lem.
One of our first picks for Sword and Laser, he's a very
well known sci-fi author.
And he wrote a story called "Memoirs Found in the Bathtub"
that I just could not get through.
And it's one of Tom's favorite books of all time.
We read it for "Sword and Laser" and it
just became a verb.
Like, to lem it.
So if you can't get through a book, you lem it.
And it almost got out of control, because now whenever
we have a book pick for "Sword and Laser," if people don't
like it, they'll post a forum thread immediately saying,
"I'm lemming this book.
It's not for me.
Blah blah blah." Okay, there's no more
immediate like vocal Lemmings.
You just kind of have to let it go for a little bit, let
people get into it.
And then, people get pretty mad.
But he also wrote "Solaris," so he's a super famous author.
He's a great author.
Great, amazingly talented author.
But I just couldn't get into that particular book.
So that's where it comes from.
FELICIA DAY: What other books have you not be able to read?
I lemmed "The Hobbit" the first time I read it.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Really?
FELICIA DAY: I'm sorry.
I read all the "Lord of"--
KIALA KAZEBEE: How old were you when you read it "The
Hobbit?"
FELICIA DAY: I was probably like in college.
And then I of course have read it since.
And I was like, you were dumb butt.
The irony was, with "The Lord of the Rings," I read every
single word.
For some reason, "The Hobbit" annoyed the crap out of me.
KIALA KAZEBEE: "The Hobbit" was for kids.
FELICIA DAY: I know.
KIALA KAZEBEE: So that's probably why.
Well.
It's still pretty--
meh.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I read it as a kid.
VERONICA BELMONT: So speaking of the Baroque cycle, I lemmed
"Quicksilver" once.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh yeah.
FELICIA DAY: I tried that one twice.
VERONICA BELMONT: And I feel like a terrible person,
because I love Stephenson and I just could not.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I did the same thing.
FELICIA DAY: Me, too, I couldn't do it.
VERONICA BELMONT: Too much words.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Too many of those words.
FELICIA DAY: I want to go back and read that, because I feel
like I will get into it if I just have the self-discipline
to give it a chance.
VERONICA BELMONT: I just need a desert island, and no other
forms of distraction, so I can just really dig down into it.
But I loved Isaac's character in that book.
Isaac Newton.
BONNIE BURTON: So are we talking about books we've
recently lemmed?
Or lemmed in a big way?
FELICIA DAY: Just in life.
BONNIE BURTON: I have lemmed some interesting books.
Like I lemmed "Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man." I've
actually burned that book.
Thrown it across a wall.
[INAUDIBLE] of a bus.
Thrown it at an ex-boyfriend who liked it.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Really?
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah, I hate that book.
That book is so self-serving.
I hate that book.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh, I love that book.
I even have the original manuscript thingy.
Not the original one, like the original.
But like the first edition, it's called something else.
BONNIE BURTON: I just couldn't get through it.
And I lemmed the Bible.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Well.
BONNIE BURTON: It's a tough read.
It's really cool when the rapture happens.
FELICIA DAY: I don't think you can read that
one all the way through.
I think you're okay.
BONNIE BURTON: But you should at least once.
Because then every time a Bible-thumper quotes
something, you could go, I don't think so.
KIALA KAZEBEE: You can't rationalize with them.
FELICIA DAY: But you have to know what
talking about that then.
What about you, Kiala?
BONNIE BURTON: But I was big into angel whore.
And so I read every passage with any kind of angel
anything in the Bible.
And that's when I found out that, angels don't have wings.
Nope.
Not one.
Not mentioned in the Bible at all.
Nope.
FELICIA DAY: We're going to do an Angel month later.
I've got two books that are going to be great.
It's not going to next month, but the one after that maybe.
BONNIE BURTON: I love angel lore.
So I will geek out over that.
FELICIA DAY: Okay, good.
Because there's a lot of really good angel paranormal
romance out there.
Even though, logistically, I'm always like,
where are the wing?
VERONICA BELMONT: Speaking of angel sexy times,
BONNIE BURTON: Now I'm going to go look it up.
VERONICA BELMONT: The new Tad Williams.
FELICIA DAY: Is so good.
VERONICA BELMONT: The Bobby Dollar, "Dirty Streets of
Heaven," has a really hot sex scene.
BONNIE BURTON: With angels?
VERONICA BELMONT: With an angel and a demon.
FELICIA DAY: It's a guy point of view.
It's more like Harry Dresden books.
BONNIE BURTON: I love his books.
Of [INAUDIBLE]
FELICIA DAY: The kind of books that we read.
But you guys are reading it this month on "Sword and
Laser," right?
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, we just finished it up, we did
the wrap up episode.
It's coming out on Friday.
FELICIA DAY: So good.
VERONICA BELMONT: I liked it.
A lot of people, a lot of our readers didn't, because they
were expecting Tad Williams' regular kind of style, which
is more of an epic fantasy.
And this is much more noir, mystery,
kind of urban fantasy.
FELICIA DAY: I was like that with Jacqueline Carey's latest
book, which is urban fantasy.
I was like, oh no, I wanted her epic "Kushiel's Dart." It
was still good, but it definitely wasn't what I went
in thinking that I wanted.
VERONICA BELMONT: Right.
FELICIA DAY: Even though I enjoyed it in the end.
BONNIE BURTON: Wait, Kiala was holding up a book earlier.
VERONICA BELMONT: Sorry, Kiala.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh yeah.
"Empire of the Sun."
VERONICA BELMONT: A band?
KIALA KAZEBEE: No.
BONNIE BURTON: Wasn't it with Brad Pitt?
BONNIE BURTON: No.
It was Christian Bale, actually, in the movie.
But, yeah, it's JG Ballard.
And I've tried to read this, and Umberto Eco, "The Name of
The Rose." Could not.
FELICIA DAY: Forget it.
Forget it.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah.
I really tried, and I couldn't.
BONNIE BURTON: Did any of you get through "Fountainhead?"
Because I couldn't do that, either.
KIALA KAZEBEE: No.
Ayn Rand's a hard read.
VERONICA BELMONT: How about "The Old Man and the Sea?"
BONNIE BURTON: It's a lot more interesting if you pretend
that the old man is a werewolf.
I'll tell you that.
VERONICA BELMONT: You love doing that.
That's your trick.
BONNIE BURTON: It makes it better. "Portrait of the
Artist as a Young Werewolf" is so much better.
FELICIA DAY: You should write that.
You could write it.
It's public domain.
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah, there ya go.
FELICIA DAY: That would be a good NaNoWriMo.

BONNIE BURTON: And [INAUDIBLE] is much better if you just
stick to some demon stuff, and stick somewhere
werewolves in there.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh, that's another one. "The
Cryptonomenon," I got--
VERONICA BELMONT: "The Cryptonomicon."
KIALA KAZEBEE: I got three quarters of
the way through that.
I loved Doug Shaftoe or whatever, but I just couldn't
deal with it.
It was really complicated.

FELICIA DAY:On another note, Piper's Twin on the chat asks,
"Do zombie farts smell?"
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yes.
VERONICA BELMONT: And they eat all that tofu.
BONNIE BURTON: I know.
VERONICA BELMONT: Geez.
Tofu farts are the worst.
KIALA KAZEBEE: What?
I eat a lot of tofu.
BONNIE BURTON: I don't understand that.
In all vampire and werewolf romances, where there's a
protagonist where you're supposed to care about them,
they always do the blood bank thing with vampires.
Or they do rats, or something gross.
They drink rat's blood and everyone's like, well, that's
fine, it's a rat.
Or pigeon blood.
I don't know why they don't go after pigeons.
But anyway.
They got after things we don't care about.
So why the hell were these zombies eating tofu?
Couldn't they just give them a bunch of rats?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Rat brains.
VERONICA BELMONT: I don't now, if you're going on the tame
zombie vibe, maybe you want to keep their food to a more
bland variety.
KIALA KAZEBEE: They're vegan zombies.
VERONICA BELMONT: They're vegan zombies.
KIALA KAZEBEE: And as a vegan.
Mostly.

BONNIE BURTON: As a zombie.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I appreciate that.
BONNIE BURTON: It would've been
funnier if they ate vegans.
VERONICA BELMONT: If they only ate vegans?
If zombies only ate vegans?
FELICIA DAY: They would have good breath.
They would have good breath.

BONNIE BURTON: If they wanted to have better breath, just
feed them a bunch of mint.
I don't know.
FELICIA DAY: Mint is bad for your acid reflux.
I learned that yesterday.
Has anybody read "iZombie" comic, by the way?
Because a lot of people--
BONNIE BURTON: I like it.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, I read it, too.
I read the first couple of issues.
I forgot to go back, but that is a really good comic and
people in the forums were recommending it, as well, as a
comic book form of something like "White Trash Zombie."
VERONICA BELMONT: I really want to check out "Warm
Bodies" now, because that was one of the books I was going
to pick, but then we were kind of like, eh male protagonist.
We don't usually go that route.
FELICIA DAY: Yeah, I think male protagonist is the one
that probably will work in the club.
Although, obviously, we were saying we were going to go
more sexy times, and we didn't this month.
VERONICA BELMONT: I failed.
KIALA KAZEBEE: That's okay.
FELICIA DAY: This is what we did as a result, guys.
We put it on the forums.
And we made a poll.
Everybody posted a book they liked, and I hand-picked 10 of
them that I saw that had some sexy times.
And I put them in a poll, a silent poll.
And then I opened it up last night really quick for people
to change their votes.
And we have our books picked.
But here's the thing.
Here's the thing, guys.
I'm going to exercise some executive power here.
VERONICA BELMONT: Uh-oh, dictatorial.
FELICIA DAY: OK, listen.
Our number one book was--
KIALA KAZEBEE: Dick.
FELICIA DAY: Really?
Vaginatorial?
Vagitorial?
FELICIA DAY: Yes.
The Vaginal board.
Listen.
The number one pick was decisively "Succubus Blues,"
by Richelle Mead.
So we're definitely doing that as our number
one pick next month.
Thank you for voting.
The problem is that number two is
"Outlander," by Diana Gabaldon.

I don't know.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Gabalabadon.
FELICIA DAY: Gabalabadon.
VERONICA BELMONT: Gabalabadingdong.
We are offensive.
FELICIA DAY: And I said that the alt would
be the second pick.
And this book is really big.
And I feel like it's too--
BONNIE BURTON: How big is it Felicia?

VERONICA BELMONT: Low hanging fruit, Bonnie.
BONNIE BURTON: In more ways than one.
FELICIA DAY: She's a basement dweller.
She'll go as low as you can.
BONNIE BURTON: I don't live in a basement.
What are you talking about?
FELICIA DAY: I just meant, that was low.
I don't know where the analogy is.
This is derailing.
VERONICA BELMONT: She's a basement dweller.
BONNIE BURTON: I am not.
I live in a top floor [INAUDIBLE].
FELICIA DAY: Do you, really?
BONNIE BURTON: Yeah.
FELICIA DAY: I mean it.
VERONICA BELMONT: Everyone on YouTube is going to say you're
mean to Bonnie now.
BONNIE BURTON: All the comments.
[INAUDIBLE]
Felicia.
FELICIA DAY: No.
I love you, Bonnie.
I meant to say that there's nothing so
low that you wouldn't--
that there's no too low hanging fruit for you.
Which is great.
I love it.
VERONICA BELMONT: Low hanging fruit is probably the worst
thing that we've said.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Balls.
FELICIA DAY: What does that mean, anyway?
VERONICA BELMONT: Low hanging fruit is low,
it's easy to grab.
FELICIA DAY: Exactly
KIALA KAZEBEE: Like balls.
VERONICA BELMONT: Like balls.
FELICIA DAY: Oh boy.
VERONICA BELMONT: I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Kiala said it.
Not me.
I said after.
KIALA KAZEBEE: I said it, like, nine times.

FELICIA DAY: That's it, guys.
We love you even though you have bangs.
VERONICA BELMONT: Oh leave her alone.

BONNIE BURTON: Be proud of your bangs.
Don't be a bus
VERONICA BELMONT: She's bangin'.
FELICIA DAY: Here is what's going to happen, guys.
We're going to do "Outlander" as our
primary pick for January.
So that way, this will give this very large book the due
that it needs.
And we'll be able to all read it, because it's actually a
really great book.
But it's hard to get through it, it's hard to get.
It just takes a long time, like "Kushiel's Dart."
So I didn't want to not be able to get to discuss it,
because I feel like it's too good a book not to really
discuss in-depth.
So here's the deal.
We're going to do "Succubus Blues," by Richelle
Mead, as our main.
And our alt will be "Dragon, Actually," by somebody Aiken.
BONNIE BURTON: That's a cool name.
VERONICA BELMONT: With dragons in it?
FELICIA DAY: Yes.
It's a dragon shape-shifter.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Like that one behind you?
FELICIA DAY: Yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: Wait, what?
VERONICA BELMONT: I've been burned by this idea before.

FELICIA DAY: It's a squishable.
BONNIE BURTON: Back up.
Is this a dragon romance?
Are we going see some sexy times with the dragon?
FELICIA DAY: Yes, if you look at the cover--
no, our first, the primary pick is "Succubus Blues,"
about a succubus.
A woman who's a succubus.
And then the alt is a shape-shifting dragon.
And the cover of it is like an oiled chest, just like that.
So both of them are going to have plenty of Christmas smut
for you guys.
And then we'll do "Outlander" as the primary pick in
January, so everybody's vote counts.
And all that stuff.
Happy?
I don't care.
We're doing it
VERONICA BELMONT: Noogies.
Yeah, I'm going to start reading this one tonight.
FELICIA DAY: You are?
VERONICA BELMONT: Yeah.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yeah.
BONNIE BURTON: He's got [INAUDIBLE] right quick.
VERONICA BELMONT: You have a lot of taxidermy.

FELICIA DAY: Oh good.
So guys, we're going to delay-- basically the Hangout
is on Christmas.
So obviously we're not going to all be hanging out for
Vaginal Fantasy on Christmas.
So we're delaying the Hangout to December 30.
You want to do it on Christmas night?
Really?
BONNIE BURTON: I don't know.
FELICIA DAY: No, we're not doing it.
BONNIE BURTON: Maybe it'll just be me.
FELICIA DAY: It'll just be you in a Hangout alone.
VERONICA BELMONT: In her basement.
FELICIA DAY:So we'll do an afternoon Hangout at 2:00 PM
on December 30.
So it will be the last day of the month And we'll do a
daytime one, so everybody will have to
have mimosas or something.
Or screwdrivers.
KIALA KAZEBEE: Oh yeah.
VERONICA BELMONT: [SINGING]
Jingle bells, zombie smells.
FELICIA DAY: Is whiskey a Sunday drink?
KIALA KAZEBEE: Yes.
VERONICA BELMONT: When is bourbon?
I don't know.

FELICIA DAY: Okay that's all.
That's all I have to go over.
So everybody have a lovely holiday, whatever you're
celebrating.
And we'll see you next month.
December 30.
Bye.