Desi Parents and Guests

Jasmeet OYE! All day you've been sitting here on your fat ass, I've done the groceries and you haven't done anything!
The blinds are all open, TV's playing Jersey Shore (wtf?), dusting, dirty dishes need to be done.
I'm gonna smash the TV over your face one day...
Clean something up! Look at this Sears book, its been sitting here for the past few days. *throws book at face*
Who's gonna open up the blinds? Your sitting in pitch black darkness
You didn't even cut the grass?! Look at the size of those mothafriggin weeds! LOOK!
Look at this waterbottle... I got you this in grade 3... and it's been sitting there since then.
Never even used it once, and you were crying so badly when you wanted it.
Doesn't even clean! Even though he's free all day!
How is it clean? DOES THIS LOOK CLEAN TO YOU?! Are you BLIND again?!
Go look at your bed, it's not even made. Your pillows are everywhere, your blanket... still there. Your eyes exploded it seems like.
Playing games all day... Alright GET UP now! Or you'll get something else thrown at your ugly face.
NOW you remember to cut the grass? Forget it! Come inside and do the dusting now!
Someone open the door! OPEN THE DOOR!
Isn't anyone going to open the door?!
Is your good for nothing dead or alive still?! OPEN THE DAMN DOOR!
Jasmeet COME HERE! Go give cha to the guests! GTFO!
ahh, the cha is here.
So uh, Jasmeet... show uncle here the dance that you do. The hand clap one.
Jasmeet... do the dance.
Jasmeet... Jasmeet *in scary-friggin stern punjabi father voice*
I told you once, and I don't wanna say it twice... DANCE NOW!
So we're having more guests come over, I need you to cook more dinner.
Mom: More dinner? I just made some... Dad: Leh, don't say things like that.
Mom: So am I a servant now? I gotta make more dough! Dad: Just make a few more Roti's
Make it yourself, MAKE THE DOUGH YOURSELF! Then I'll make those roti's, or else I'm not even making it.
OR even better, get catering done. I'm not even touching another roti, no matter what anyone does. I'm not anyone's servant here.
I'm not a machine, not a robot. I can't work ALL DAY! First go to work in the morning, then come home to this shieeet
So how did you guys like the roti's? Hopefully they were good!
Ok, so I got a little something for kaka here. Here you go!
Mom: Nono! Leave it, your giving 100 dollars! that much? Aunty: Please please, leave it!
You shouldn't give away this much of your hard earned money. People come all the way to Canada and put in so much effort!
Mom: No no, 100 dollars is too much. Give 50 if you want. Aunty: Take the money Mom: I'll kick your ass later, just watch.
Aunty: I'm like your massi, think of me like your second mom. Mom: GET BACK SISTA! What are you doing?!
Aunty: Listen, you've already done enough. This money is nothing! Mom: Why won't you back off, your gonna spoil these kids, as if they aren't spoiled and ugly enough!
GET BACK WOMAN!
They never call us for cha, yet they come over to our house like every day and salvage all our food.
It's like they don't even work or anything. Acting like they just won the lottery... shieeeeet.
Not everyone is a millionaire you know.
He's saying they bought a $700,000 house, I don't care... Buy all the houses you want. Look at their car, who do they think they are rolling around in that BMW.
Million dollar house, 2 million dollar house, 3 million... who cares?
Look at her suit, its soo nastily grossly ugly, its disgusting, shes a pig, like a fat one.
They don't even have common sense, fatasses, look how fat they are, theyre gonna explode one day I swear.
Dad: Challo, at least they left some money. Mom: They weren't giving money!
I had to beg them to leave some money for our kids, and they were all like "NO, we're not giving your kids anything!"
Eating roti's on rotis on roti's... fatass pig-like snout faced woman.