How to Play Tennis w/ Beth LIVE! - 8/28/12 (Full Ep)


Uploaded by MyDamnChannel on 28.08.2012

Transcript:

BETH HOYT: Classic Prince, just like Federer.

Hi, you guys.
I'm Beth Hoyt.
This is MyDamnChannel LIVE, and today I'm going to teach
you how to play tennis.
Kind of.
You see, the US Open started this weekend.
Also, I went to this Tennis 360 event where I saw Andy
Roddick, and I interviewed some lesser famous tennis
people, and I drank free white wrine--
white wine.
But mostly I want to talk about tennis
because I love it.
Not just because I think Federer is princely and I want
to marry him after he gets a divorce.
I really like tennis.
And I'm an expert.
So please, you guys.
Put any questions about tennis that you have
for me in the chat.
I'll answer them.
Or any tips--
I'm open to those, too.
Let's take one now.
Do we have a comment or a--?
Yeah, we do.
This is from angelfeelsbored.
"I would very much like to see Beth try and do this face
haha." That looks like boobs to me, with cleavage, right?
Can I see that again?
Um--
oh, maybe it's a-- oh, is it like a duck?
Don't you have to have a beak for that?
Anyway, I can do that.

I think that was it.
Did I get it?
It's either that, or it's like this.
I'm not sure.
OK.
First things first.
Let's talk about how you look to play tennis.
I mean, you have to be a good athlete too.
That's one thing you need to be a good tennis player.
But you're never going to get deals with brands if you don't
have a look.
And if you don't get the deals, then you can't pay for
a personal masseuse.
And then what is the point of being a professional athlete?
Right, exactly.
There isn't one.
I chose for my look today to wear a basic top, because I'm
not branded yet.
Once Nike or whomever decides to pay me, then I'll wear
their shirts.
OK.
I'm also wearing basic skirt.
I'll give you this later.
And tennis-ball colored shoes.
All right.
Now let's get to the hair.
I think it's important to go with however you feel
comfortable.
A ponytail is common, tp keep a common athletic do.
I like to wear it down, just because it's an added
challenge and because it's part of the look.
You know, like the blond girl, it's like you've got to make
that part of it.
You could also wear something like this.
That could-- yeah.
I'll do that.
And then here's the thing with necklaces.
You know, there's always the jewelry options.
it's like, are you gonna--
these are my mother's pearls and they're good luck.
Are you gonna do that?
Or are you gonna wear something that's symbolic,
like, oh, I'm the feather of a bird when I play.
Are you gonna do that?
Or are you going to be, like, Michelle Kwan-y, and wear a
pendant that's just like--
why are you struggling with that huge thing, you know?
Remember Michelle Kwan with that necklace she always wore?
Could do that.
I'm going basic, basic necklace.
It has a B. that means something to me.
And heavy on the earrings, because there's then that
added challenge and skill required for it not to poke
your eyeball out.
Which knowing me could very well happen.
But also, knowing me, my eyeballs aren't doing so
great, so let's poke 'em out.
OK.
We have a comment from YouTube.
And this is from IMightBeKharla.
OK, Maybe Kharla.
"Why are tennis balls green?" That's a very good question.
And it's because the man who invented them
is named Mr. Green.
And they were like, well, what a great thing we could do for
him, than to name these balls after him and also the
Professor Green in-- oh, that's Professor Plum.
Who's the green one in Clue?
Mr. Green.
I nailed it.
All right.
Here's the next thing you want to think about, is where
you're going to put--
I look like a gypsy with the earrings and this thing.
Let's just go with-- now I look more
like a tennis player.
OK.
Next thing you have to think about is where you're going to
put the balls.
Because you know how the girls always just stock 'em places?
Don't the girls just always like have
them in their shorts?
So I'm wearing, underneath my skirt, shorts with pockets.
So that's how you do it.
You have to have shorts with pockets.
And then you also want to put one just, like--
I'm also wearing Spandex, because when you go for a
serve so you don't get any air in the woo-woo!
So I also am going to put one up there, just in case I need
to serve again.
Let's put another one down here.
Stick one right there.
And then just to have, just in case to have two more on hand,
we just want to make sure we have them, you know?
Just in case we need them very last-minute for a serve.
Speaking of sticking things up your butt, you guys, here's a
video from LinkedOut.
You'll see the connection.
You'll get it.
Here we go.

DR. FRED WILSON: Hi.
I'm Dr. Fred Wilson, and I'm here to tell you about Med
Fax, a new app that diagnoses all of your medical symptoms
in just a matter of seconds.
Sounds crazy, right?
Well, say you want to check your temperature.
All you have to do is open the app, load the page, and then
stick it up your butt.
PATIENT: Oh!
98.6 degrees Fahrenheit.
Cool.
DR. FRED WILSON: Yes.
That is cool.
But what if your throat hurts?
PATIENT: Just put it in my mouth?
DR. FRED WILSON: Not so fast.
Before you do that, you're going to need to go ahead and
stick it up your butt.
PATIENT: Wait.
I put the phone in my mouth after I stick it in--
DR. FRED WILSON: That's right.
Before you know it, you'll find out if you have
bronchitis, strep, or just a simple sore throat.
PATIENT: [GAGS]
Oh.
Strep.
I guess that's kind of cool.
DR. FRED WILSON: What happens if you want to
take a chest x-ray?
PATIENT: Does Med Fax do that too?
DR. FRED WILSON: Sure does.
Just place the screen of the phone on your
chest for five seconds.
PATIENT: Oh.
Nice.
DR. FRED WILSON: Now stick it up your butt.
PATIENT: What?
DR. FRED WILSON: Podiatry?
PATIENT: I think I can take a guess.
DR. FRED WILSON: That's right.
Just stick it up your butt.
Gynecology?
PATIENT: But I don't have a vagina.
DR. FRED WILSON: Doesn't matter.
Just stick it up your butt.
Urology?
PATIENT: Right.
DR. FRED WILSON: Stick it up your butt.
Proctology?
PATIENT: Oh, I got this one.
Stick it up my butt.
DR. FRED WILSON: No.
Press the phone against your lower back.
Hold your breath for five seconds, and then
wait for the beep.
PATIENT: OK.
DR. FRED WILSON: Then stick it up your butt.
PATIENT: Jesus Christ, are we done here?
DR. FRED WILSON: No, there's more.
Now you can get Med Fax on your tablet as well.
PATIENT: No.
No.
Absolutely not.
Not going to happen.
DR. FRED WILSON: Med Fax.
Just stick it up your butt.
PATIENT: [SIGH]
Is that a wrap?
STEVE RANNAZZISI: Hey, I'm Steve Rannazzisi from Daddy
Knows Best, and you're watching MyDamnChannel LIVE.

BETH HOYT: Cool.
So another reason I'm thinking I'm athletic is 'cause we're
working with Bleacher Report on some stuff.
You guys should check out their YouTube channel.
It's YouTube.com/BleacherReport.
They're really fun.
They're the guys who I went to Tennis 360 with, drank some
white wine with, and we're going to be doing a lot of fun
stuff with them in future.
Sports.
Sportsy-like.
OK.
Here's something that's really confusing about tennis and you
should figure out before you become a
professional tennis player.
It's the scoring.
If you know nothing about it, you might have to
get a book on it.
It's very complicated.
OK, here it goes.
It goes game, set, match.
So if you win a game, you're like, great, I won!
But really, it's like, big deal.
You have to win six of them.
Don't even give me started if there's a tiebreak.
It's very confusing.
After you win six, then you're like, then you won the set.
And you're like, awesome.
Don't think you get to go eat a Snickers yet.
In the US Open, for example, you have to play two if you're
a girl, three if you're a boy.
And then those are games.
And then you win the match.
Did I lose you?
Also, love means zero.
Which is what I tell myself on lonely nights.
Zing!
That was harmful to myself.
All right.
We have a comment from YouTube.
Satyanlsabella.
OK.
Let's do that again.
SatyanaIsabella.
That's a tough one.
That's a lot of A's in there. "I'd like to know.
who Beth is.
First time on this channel." With this face.
A lot of faces, they like--
and then just this--.
Like to know who Beth is?

Where do we begin, you guys?
I'm a tennis player extraordinaire, which is a
really big-time athlete.
I can handle losing.
I like to win.
But I don't often do that, winning.
I'm afraid of octopus, we learned yesterday.
I didn't, you did.
I mean, I've known that for quite a while.
I'm afraid of thrills.
I'm allergic to chlorine.
That's new.
I mean, it's not to me, again.
I've lived with it.
I am me.
These are tennis balls.
This is not me.
That's a few things.
OK.
Now how about I teach you guys some tennis strokes?
Should we do that?
We'll keep going through your comments and questions, so
keep sending those in.
All right.
I've got balls everywhere.
Let's start with one of these.
OK.
So this is how you serve.
Basically you just, you want to bounce the
ball as many times--
about 45 times.
You just want to really, really
intimidate the other person.
And what the other person is doing is just getting more and
more nervous, and doing this hoppy thing to keep, like, the
blood circulating through their legs.
OK?
So you just keep on bouncing the ball.
You guys can go get a snack or make a sandwich.
I'm still going to just be doing this before my serve.
We have a comment.
It's from ilovecookies98.
Who's your favorite tennis player and why?
It's Federer.
Because he's, like, a prince.
I want to marry him.
I really Federer a lot.
I mean, I really like--
I like Nadal too, and I really like Serena Williams.
I know--
I've had some arguments with this about people--
with people about this.
But I think she's like a real athlete.
I like watching her play because she's a great tennis
player, but mostly she's just, like, an athlete.
Speaking of which, let's get into the serve, which is what
Serena does.
And she just aces it.
OK, we got the other one up in here.
Oh.
Pull it out of your butt.
So then you're doing this a million times.
And then the grunt you want to do with a serve, it's very
complicated.
Because you're throwing this up there-- at first you want
to throw it up and then go, oh, no, no, no,
the wind, the wind.
Then you throw it up again, and you're going to want to
just slam it as hard as you can, with a grunt that comes
from, like, up here.
Because you're up there doing that, OK?
So I'm not going to use this ball, but I'm going to show
you the example of the motion and then the grunt.
OK, ready?
That's when you throw it, and then you go--
[GRUNT].
That's a grunt.
That's a serve grunt.
OK?
The next stroke is from this tennis--
is the forehand.
The forehand is just the most basic stroke, and it
just goes like this.
Like that.
That's all you do.
And then--
excuse me.
So you go like this, and it's just the most basic stroke, so
it's the most basic grunt.
So basically-- you could practice this at home.
Just get up and do this with me.
It just basically goes, [BASIC GRUNT].
Just like that.
And you want to rotate on this back foot.
[BASIC GRUNT].
It's like that.
The next stroke is the hardest.
And I just always, whenever I play, just try to make
everything the forehand.
So if someone hits it to my backhand, I just
go, oh no you didn't!
And I go over here and I hit it with the forehand.
It's--
once in a while, when they really get me and I'm forced
to do the backstroke, it's so hard.
Right, guys?
Backstroke is tough.
Unless you're ambidextrous.
Anyway, the backstroke, since it's such a hard--
since it's such a hard stroke, you have to really use a grunt
that comes from down here.
So that involves being like--
ready?
So this is when you're like, aw, damn you for making me
backstroke.
You go--
[ANGRY GRUNT].
Got it?
So this one's just [HIGHER-PITCHED GRUNT]
.
And this one's [ANGRY GRUNT].
All right.
So I'm gonna just hit a few balls now.
Oh, this last one's just a little volley, when you just
go like this.
It's just a real light, like, [BREATHY GRUNT].
So.
Oh, we have a comment from YouTube.
It's IsThisAwkwardEnough.
Great name!
How come I don't have that one?
"Beth, make the noise of a sloth.
You know you
want to." And then--
yeah, I want to.
I think--
I gotta get rid of the--
It's like this, right?
Um.

Not that.
Nnnnngguunnnh.

Is that right?
OK.
So Nate's gonna--
Nate, can you throw me some balls?
So there are some people here that are-- you guys all--
none of you have insurance.
I'm going to kill you.
We're going to use--
[GIRLY SQUEAL]
I wasn't ready, Nate.
That grunt is the grunt of a girl.
That's a girl's squeal.
That's not a tennis grunt.
I wasn't ready.
I'm going to hit some ping-pong balls because they
don't want to kill the studio with tennis balls.
But I don't mind hurting these guys with ping-pong.
Here we go.
[BASIC GRUNT]
[BREATHY GRUNT]
[BREATHY GRUNT]
[BASIC GRUNT]
This is all forehand.
It's good.
Uh-uh.
Uh-uh.
Let me try a backhand.
I can try it.
[ANGRY GRUNT]
Oh.
Good, I was feeling kind of winded.
Let's look at another comment from YouTube.
It's from cebrengirinis.
You guys, this is challenging.
"So, in order to play tennis, is some training in martial
arts recommended?" Absolutely.
Nate.
[BREATHY GRUNT]
It's just to be good on your toes and
also to keep you centered.
So--
I actually did study aikido in college, which is weird,
because it's with a bunch of old men, and I just threw all
these old men around.
This sounds like I'm making it up.
It's actually true and very weird.
So that helps you be grounded.
And it helps with the grunting.
Yeah, that's why it helps.
So they really do go hand-in-hand, tennis and
martial arts.
Next comment.
It's from Try--
Try, give, hemming, height.
Oh, nice.
Nice.
"Try pronouncing my name." And then a lot of
tongues out at me.
Yeah.
You got me.
That was a good joke.
It was a really good one.
I need to get that out.
You got me kind of angsty.
[ANGRY GRUNT]
Try, give, Hemingway.
This is--
that's a grunt using your username.
[BASIC GRUNT]
[BASIC GRUNT]
[BASIC GRUNT]
How am I doing, guys?
OK.
Let's do a serve.
Here, I'll do it myself.
Oh, gosh.
I didn't say I could catch balls.
Ready?
So you bounce and bounce and bounce.
I'm gonna watch--
I'm gonna hopefully not--
oh, that hits it.
This might be dangerous.
I'll do it on my knees.
OK.
(MUTTERING) That's what she said.
All right.
[SCREAMY GRUNT]
That was a perfect serve grunt, you guys.
[BASIC GRUNT]
All right.
And we have another comment from YouTube.
extreme29.
"I'm trying very hard not to make any dirty jokes." So was
I. So was I. I failed.
Did you?
Definitely failed.
So.
All right, let's keep playing.
Unless--
Nate, now you're just throwing them in my center.
I understand that my job is probably to move, but you
could just throw it, make me look good, you know?
[BASIC GRUNT]
[BASIC GRUNT]
Oh, I hit Nate on that.
Oh my god, I didn't mean to catch it.
I meant to hit it.
I think I pretty much nailed it.
That's how you guys play tennis.
So be sure to subscribe.
Thank you for putting in the comments today.
And tune in tomorrow at 4:00 PM Eastern, because our big
show is hosted by both Grace and me.
We're going to be chatting it up with you guys a lot from
the Live Chat.
So stay in the chat until tomorrow.
No.
Come back tomorrow at 4:00.
It's our big, final, summer party.
It's going to be really fun.
See you then.
Bye.