Part 1 - Visionary Parenting - Dr. Rob Rienow - Host, Dr. Freda Crews

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>AS ALWAYS I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR JOINING US ON TIME FOR
HOPE AN INTERNATIONAL FAITH-BASED MENTAL HEALTH
PROGRAM AND I'M DR. FREDA CREWS YOUR HOST. JOINING ME
TODAY TO TALK ABOUT A SUBJECT THAT IS CRITICALLY NEEDED BY
EVERY FAMILY IN THE WORLD IS HUSBAND, FATHER, PASTOR,
AUTHOR AND FOUNDER OF VISIONARY FAMILY MINISTRIES
DR. ROB RIENOW. DR. ROB HAS WRITTEN A BOOK BEARING HIS
HEART AND SOUL RELATED TO PARENTING AND IT IS TITLED
VISIONARY PARENTING, SUBTITLED CAPTURE A GOD SIZED VISION FOR
YOUR FAMILY. AS WE DISCUSSED THIS BOOK YOU WILL FIND THAT
MOST PARENTS HAVE A GREAT NEED TO BECOME MORE INTENTIONAL IN
REARING THEIR CHILDREN IN THE FEAR AND ADMONITION OF THE
LORD. TAKING THEM TO CHURCH EVERY SUNDAY AND OR HANDING
THEM OVER TO A YOUTH DIRECTOR IN YOUR CHURCH IS NOT WHERE IT
SHOULD START. INSTEAD OUR GUEST RELATES THAT OUR
CHILDREN WILL LEARN MORE FROM WHO WE AS PARENTS ARE AT HOME.
FOR MORE STAY WITH US.
>AND ROB I HOPE YOU'RE COMFORTABLE WITH ME CALLING
YOU ROB.
>I ABSOLUTELY AM THANKS FOR HAVING ME.
>IT'S GREAT HAVING YOU ON TIME FOR HOPE AND YOU AND I SHARE
SOMETHING IN COMMON THAT WE'RE BOTH GRADUATES OF TRINITY AND
IT'S NOW INTERNATIONAL. TELL ME ABOUT IT, TRINITY
INTERNATIONAL UNIVERSITY.
>YES IN DEERFIELD ILLINOIS AND THAT'S WHERE I DID MY MASTER
OF DIVINITY DEGREE AND WAS BLESSED TO BE A PART OF THINGS
THERE.
>AND I DID MY DOCTOR OF MINISTRY DEGREE WHEN IT WAS
CALLED TEDS, TRINITY EVANGELICAL DIVINITY SCHOOL.
SO I DIDN'T KNOW, I KNEW THEY HAD CHANGED A PORTION OF IT
BUT I DIDN'T KNOW THEY HAD CHANGED THE WHOLE SCHOOL EVEN
THOUGH I GET THE ALUMNI NEWS AND ALL OF THAT. BUT ANYWAY
IT'S GOOD HAVING YOU.
>THANK YOU SO MUCH.
>YOU SAID SOMETHING HAPPENED TO YOU IN 2004 THAT CHANGED
YOUR LIFE PERIOD BUT ESPECIALLY YOUR PARENTING OR
THE VIEWS ON PARENTING THAT YOU'RE SHARING IN THIS BOOK.
>YES 2004, THE SUMMER OF 2004 I HAD BEEN A YOUTH PASTOR FOR
ABOUT 10 YEARS. MY WIFE AMY AND I HAD BEEN MARRIED ABOUT
THE SAME AMOUNT OF TIME. WE HAD FOUR CHILDREN AT THAT
POINT, WE'RE BLESSED WITH SIX NOW. AND GOD BROUGHT ME TO
SUCH A DEEP PLACE OF BROKENNESS AND REPENTANCE IN
MY OWN LIFE BECAUSE AS A FATHER I WAS NOT DOING
ANYTHING INTENTIONAL TO PASS MY FAITH TO MY OWN CHILDREN. I
WAS A YOUTH PASTOR AT MY CHURCH SO MY HEART, REALLY
IT'S A TERRIBLE WAY TO SAY IT, MY HEART AND PASSION WAS IN
PASSING MY FAITH TO EVERYBODY ELSE'S CHILDREN AT MY CHURCH
AND HELPING EVERYBODY ELSE'S MARRIAGE AND HELPING EVERYBODY
ELSE'S FAMILY. BUT MY OWN CHILDREN AT HOME JUST GOT THE
SPIRITUAL SCRAPS AND LEFTOVERS OF MY LIFE. AND GOD AS IT SAYS
IN MALACHI 4 TURNED MY HEART TO THE MINISTRY OF MY CHILDREN
AND WE'VE BEEN ON A JOURNEY EVER SINCE.
>YOU KNOW I AM SO AFRAID THAT YOUR STORY, WHAT YOU JUST
TOLD, IS TRUE OF SO MANY PASTORS AND CHURCH LEADERS.
THAT I KNOW MANY MANY WOMEN AND MANY PASTORS'S WIVES
COMPLAIN OF THIS GOING ON. AND THEY FEEL THEY BEAR THE
RESPONSIBILITY AT HOME WHICH THEY DO ARE TO SHARE IN THE
RESPONSIBILITY AND THAT THEIR HUSBANDS ARE OUT LOOKING AFTER
EVERYBODY ELSE'S CHILDREN OR EVERYBODY ELSE'S FAMILIES
WHILE THEY'RE NOT DOING THE SAME THING AT HOME. AND IT IS
A TALL ORDER WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT, ISN'T IT EVEN AS YOU
DEALT WITH IT. IT'S A TALL ORDER TO STAY IN TOUCH WITH
YOUR MINISTRY AT LARGE BUT ALSO TO MAKE SURE THAT IT'S
CARRIED ON AT HOME. ACTUALLY THAT'S WHERE IT OUGHT TO START
ISN'T IT?
>YES ABSOLUTELY AND IT'S NOT JUST PASTORS, I THINK IT'S
BOTH MEN AND WOMEN THAT THE ENEMY IS CONSTANTLY TRYING TO
PULL OUR HEARTS OUT INTO SECONDARY THINGS. NOW THE
SECONDARY THINGS ARE THE PUBLIC MINISTRY WE HAVE. NOW
MINE WAS AT CHURCH, SOMEONE ELSE MIGHT BE AT THE SCHOOL OR
THE BANK AND A LOT OF IT EVEN GOES BACK TO HOW WE TEACH THE
GREAT COMMISSION IN THE CHURCH. IF YOU COME UP TO
SOMEBODY AND YOU SAY HOW'S MINISTRY GOING THESE DAYS WHAT
YOU'RE EXPECTING THEM TO SAY IS WELL HERE'S HOW I VOLUNTEER
IN MY WOMEN'S MINISTRY AT CHURCH OR HERE'S HOW I
VOLUNTEER IN MY MEN'S MINISTRY AT CHURCH. THINGS HAVE CHANGED
SO MUCH FOR ME PEOPLE WILL SAY ROB HOW'S MINISTRY GOING AND
I'LL SAY WELL HERE'S HOW I'M TRYING TO BLESS MY WIFE AND
ENCOURAGE HER. HERE'S HOW I'M TRYING TO PRAY WITH MY
CHILDREN AND TEACH THEM THE BIBLE. NO NO NO ROB I MEAN
MINISTRY AND I MEAN OH I'M SORRY I GOT CONFUSED BECAUSE
THE BIBLE TEACHES THAT THE GREAT COMMISSION BEING A
MISSIONAL EXTERNALLY FOCUSED GREAT COMMISSION CHRISTIAN
BEGINS WITH THE SOULS OF THESE LITTLE ONES, YOUR CHILDREN,
YOUR GRANDCHILDREN, YOUR NIECES, NEPHEWS IN THE HOME.
>AND YOU BRING OUT, AND I KNOW IT IS TRUE, THAT THE INFLUENCE
THAT WE HAVE ON OUR CHILDREN WHETHER IT'S GOOD, BAD, IN
BETWEEN, WHATEVER IS GOING TO LAST A LIFETIME AND IT'S ALSO
GOING TO DETERMINE WHAT THEY CARRY DOWN TO THE NEXT
GENERATIONS.
>YES ABSOLUTELY. PARENTS I THINK UNDERSTAND THAT THE WAY
THEY'RE PARENTING RIGHT NOW AFFECTS THEIR CHILDREN.
EVERYBODY WOULD UNDERSTAND THAT IT SEEMS OBVIOUS. BUT YOU
HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THAT THE THINGS THAT ARE GOING ON IN
YOUR HOME RIGHT NOW ARE NOT JUST AFFECTING YOUR CHILDREN
BUT THEY'RE AFFECTING YOUR GRANDCHILDREN WHO MAY NOT BE
BORN YET, YOUR GREAT-GREAT-GRANDCHILDREN YET
TO BE BORN. THE FAITH AND CHARACTER YOU'RE INVESTING IN
YOUR CHILDREN IS GOING TO REFLECT THEN AND HOW THEY
PARENT THEIR CHILDREN. THE BIBLE IS FILLED WITH THIS
MULTIGENERATIONAL VISION, THIS MULTIGENERATIONAL MISSION. ONE
OF THE I THINK PROBLEMS OF 20TH CENTURY CHRISTIANITY IS
THAT WE STARTED TALKING ABOUT CHRISTIANITY AS A PERSONAL
THING. IT'S JUST YOUR PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS AND
THAT'S TRUE THAT AS BELIEVERS WE HAVE THAT PERSONAL WALK
WITH CHRIST BUT WE MUST THINK MULTIGENERATIONALY IF WE WANT
TO ADVANCE THE GOSPEL.
>I THINK ALSO ONE OF THE THINGS THAT HAS COME INTO THIS
WHOLE PICTURE THAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT ROB IS THAT
EDUCATION. FAMILIES BECAME SO CONCERNED ABOUT EDUCATING
THEIR CHILDREN AND THEIR CHILDREN BEING SUCCESSFUL AND
EVEN PARENTS THEMSELVES LOOKING AT THAT, BABY BOOMERS
ESPECIALLY BEING HAVING THE PRIVILEGE OF SOME OF THIS. AND
IT HAS ROBBED OUR HOMES; IT'S ROBBED OUR FAMILIES OF THE WAY
THAT I KNOW IT USED TO BE IN SOME HOMES IN A GREAT NUMBER
OF HOMES IN EARLY AMERICA. THAT'S IN EARLY AMERICA AND
WE'LL TALK ABOUT JONATHAN EDWARDS AND SOME OF THEM. IT
BEGAN IN THE HOME; IN FACT JONATHAN EDWARDS TAUGHT THAT
EVERY HOME OUGHT TO BE A LITTLE CHURCH. HE SPENT AN
HOUR A DAY WITH HIS FAMILY. OF COURSE WE DON'T HAVE THE
PRIVILEGE MAYBE OF DOING THAT THESE DAYS AT THE FAST PACE
THAT WE'RE FORCED TO KEEP UP WITH SOMETIMES, BUT HE DID.
WHEN YOU STUDY WHAT THE EDWARDS FAMILY HAS CONTRIBUTED
TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA IT IS UNBELIEVABLE
THAT THEY HAD I BELIEVE IT WAS 14 CHILDREN THEY HAD AND THEN
RIGHT ON DOWN. THE ONLY ONE THEY LOST WAS AARON BURR BY
THE WAY. THAT WAS A GRANDSON THAT BECAME VICE PRESIDENT OF
THE UNITED STATES. BUT IT WORKS.
>AMEN. AMEN. AND REALLY UP UNTIL THE LATE 1800S THE
CHURCH, THE CHRISTIANS UNDERSTOOD THAT WHEN IT CAME
TO PASSING FAITH AND CHARACTER TO CHILDREN THAT WAS THE JOB
OF MOMS AND DADS AND GRANDMAS AND GRANDPAS IN THE HOME.
THERE WAS NO CHILDREN'S MINISTRY, THERE WAS NO YOUTH
MINISTRY AND WE NOW LIVE IN THIS AGE OF DELEGATION
PARENTING. YOU WANT YOUR CHILD TO LEARN PIANO, YOU GET THEM A
TUTOR, YOU WANT TO LEARN BASKETBALL, YOU GET THEM A
COACH, YOU WANT THEM TO LEARN JESUS, YOU GET THEM A YOUTH
PASTOR AND YOU JUST DRIVE THE BUS AND DROP THEM OFF AT ALL
THE DIFFERENT EXPERTS THAT ARE GOING TO RAISE YOUR CHILDREN.
AND I'M NOT OPPOSED TO COACHING OR TUTORING OR
PASTORING OR ANY OF THOSE THINGS, BUT AGAIN WHEN IT
COMES TO THE SPIRITUAL NURTURE OF CHILDREN COVER TO COVER IN
THE BIBLE THAT'S A CALL THAT GOD GIVES TO MOMS AND DADS AND
I DIDN'T SEE IT. I DIDN'T EMBRACE IT AND I HAD TO REPENT.
>WELL ANOTHER THING MISSING IS THE EVENING MEAL TOGETHER. I
WATCH MY OWN CHILDREN LET THAT GO, SOME OF THEM LETTING THAT
GO. THIS ONE GRABBING THEIR FOOD, THAT ONE GRABBING THEIR
FOOD GETTING GOING IN THEIR DIRECTION AND THE OTHER ONE
GOING IN THEIR DIRECTION. WHEN WE HAD THAT FAMILY MEAL
TOGETHER IN THE EVENING THAT CAME FROM A LONG LINE OF
TRADITION ALL THE WAY BACK TO MY GRANDPARENTS AND SO MANY OF
THE THINGS THAT I HOLD TO TODAY I CAN DATE BACK TO MY
GRANDPARENTS. AND YOU MENTIONED THE SIGNIFICANCE OF
GRANDPARENTS IN YOUR BOOK.
>YES I APPRECIATE YOUR BRINGING UP THE FAMILY MEAL
ISSUE AND A FEW MOMENTS AGO YOU TALKED ABOUT CRAZY
SCHEDULES AND YOU SAID WELL BACK THEN THEY COULD DO AN
HOUR A DAY AND TODAY WE CAN'T AND I REALLY RESPECT THAT BUT
I ALSO BELIEVE THAT WE HAVE A REAL VICTIM MENTALITY WHEN IT
COMES TO OUR FAMILY SCHEDULES. WE HAVE A VICTIM MENTALITY
WHEN IT COMES TO MY KIDS ARE INVOLVED IN ALL THESE
ACTIVITIES AND WE'RE JUST DRIVING THEM ALL OVER THE
PLACE AND WE JUST NEVER HAVE TIME. WELL WHO SIGNED THEM UP
FOR ALL THOSE ACTIVITIES? AND WHO'S WRITING THE CHECK SO
THEY CAN GO TO ALL THOSE ACTIVITIES?
>WHO'S PUTTING THE PRIORITIES IN ORDER IN THE HOUSE?
>LET ME GIVE YOU TWO QUESTIONS THAT REALLY CONVICTED ME. THE
FIRST QUESTION IS WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING, I ASKED PARENTS,
WHEN YOUR KIDS LEAVE THE HOME SOMEDAY AT AGE 18, 25 OR 50,
WHENEVER THEY'RE GOING TO MOVE OUT, WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING DO
YOU MOST WANT FOR THEM, DIVISION I ATHLETIC
SCHOLARSHIP, A HIGH IQ, A GREAT SOCIAL LIFE OR TO BE A
PERSON OF FAITH AND CHARACTER? IF YOU COULD ONLY HAVE ONE
WHICH WOULD YOU WANT? AND WHAT DO YOU THINK ALL THE PARENTS
SAY? IF YOU COULD ONLY HAVE ONE, NOW GIVE ME THE RIGHT
ANSWER WHICH IS?
>I DON'T THINK IT WOULD BE A FAITH-BASED.
>WELL YOU WOULD BE SURPRISED, THEY SAY IF I COULD ONLY HAVE
ONE OF THOSE THEN YES I'D TAKE THE FAITH AND CHARACTER OF
COURSE. THE CHRISTIAN PARENTS I SAY WELL OF COURSE I WANT MY
CHILDREN TO BE CHILDREN OF FAITH AND CHARACTER AND I SAY
OKAY GOOD. WELL LET ME ASK YOU ANOTHER QUESTION, WHICH OF THE
FOLLOWING GET THE BEST OF YOUR PARENTING TIME, MONEY, ENERGY,
WORRY, STRESS AND FOCUS?
>OH I SEE WHERE YOU'RE GOING.
>ATHLETICS OR ATHLETIC DEVELOPMENT, ACADEMIC
DEVELOPMENT, SOCIAL LIFE DEVELOPMENT OR FAITH AND
CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND I DEALT WITH THOSE TWO
QUESTIONS. OF COURSE AS A PASTOR OH THE FAITH OF MY
CHILDREN THE MOST IMPORTANT THING. BUT THEN IF YOU LOOKED
AT MY PARENTING CALENDAR IT WAS ALL SPORTS, SCHOOL,
FRIENDS, SPORTS, SCHOOL, FRIENDS, SPORTS, SCHOOL,
FRIENDS OH AND THEN TEACHABLE MOMENTS OF COURSE WHICH ISN'T
A STRATEGY. AND GOD TOOK US TO THE SCRIPTURES AND SHOWED US
SO MANY PRINCIPLES IN THE BIBLE FOR HOW TO MAKE THE
FAITH AND CHARACTER TRAINING OF YOUR CHILDREN THE NUMBER
ONE PRIORITY.
>AND YOU KNOW THEY CAN HAVE THE OTHER. LET'S LOOK AT TIM
TEBOW. THEY MUST HAVE HAD IT RIGHT AND STARTED WHERE IT WAS
RIGHT.
>THE SPORTS ISSUE IS VERY INTERESTING. I HAVE CHRISTIAN
PARENTS TELL ME ALL THE TIME WILL ROB DON'T SPORTS BUILD
CHARACTER? I MEAN I'M TRYING TO BUILD CHARACTER IN MY
CHILDREN SO I'M HAVING THEM PLAY SPORTS. WELL IF SPORTS
BUILT CHARACTER THEN THE PEOPLE WITH THE BEST CHARACTER
IN THE WORLD WOULD BE IN THE NBA AND THE NFL. THAT'S ALL
THEY DO IS PLAY TEAM SPORTS. TEAM SPORTS DON'T BUILD
CHARACTER THEY MAY REVEAL CHARACTER THAT MIGHT BE THERE,
BUT THEY DON'T BUILD IT.
> SO TEACHING OUR CHILDREN AT HOME IS WHAT YOU'RE SAYING IS
WHAT AS PARENTS, WE MUST BECOME INTENTIONAL ABOUT.
>YES I'M SAYING WHEN IT COMES TO PASSING FAITH TO CHILDREN
THAT'S THE JOB OF MOMS AND DADS AND GRANDMAS AND GRANDPAS
IN THE HOME THROUGH THE PRACTICES WE WILL TALK ABOUT,
THROUGH PRAYING WITH THEIR CHILDREN, THROUGH READING
SCRIPTURE WITH YOUR CHILDREN. NOT WILD CRAZY THINGS THAT YOU
CAN'T DO BUT THESE SIMPLE THINGS THE BIBLE GIVES US.
>AND WHEN WE THINK ABOUT IT IT IS RATHER SIMPLE. YOU
DETERMINE A TIME, YOU DETERMINE A PLACE AND YOU DO
IT. AND IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY STARTED YOU START, RIGHT?
>THAT'S RIGHT YOU CAN START SOMEWHERE.
>START SOMEWHERE AND WE'LL TALK ABOUT THAT WHEN WE COME
BACK. IT'S TIME FOR A BREAK AND WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK.
>I REMEMBER READING A FRONT PAGE NEWSPAPER HEADLINER
TITLED: "A FOREVER DECISION." THE FIRST SENTENCE RELATED HOW
AN UNMARRIED HIGH SCHOOL COUPLE, AGES 16 AND 17, THREW
CAUTION TO THE WIND DURING THEIR IMMORAL AND
IRRESPONSIBLE SEXUAL ACTIVITY AND CONCEIVED AN UNPLANNED
BABY. SIMILAR STORIES INCLUDING OLDER ADOLESCENTS
COULD EASILY BE REPEATED ON A DAILY BASIS ACROSS OUR NATION.
ACCEPTING THE RESPONSIBILITY OF A BABY WAS NOT IN THIS
COUPLE'S IMMEDIATE PLANS AND THE STORY RELATED HOW THEIR
LIVES WERE CHANGED FOREVER WITH THE PREGNANCY AND BIRTH
OF THEIR DAUGHTER. ACCORDING TO THE NEWSPAPER ACCOUNT THE
COUPLE QUICKLY DISCOVERED THAT PARENTING IS NOT FOR CHILDREN,
AND THAT BECOMING A PARENT HAS FORCED THESE TWO YOUNG PEOPLE
TO GROW UP PREMATURELY. WHETHER YOUNG OR OLDER,
MARRIED OR SINGLE, WHETHER PLANNED OR UNPLANNED,
SUCCESSFUL PARENTING IS NO CHILD'S PLAY. ASSUMING THE
ROLE OF A PARENT LITERALLY PLACES THE CHILD'S DESTINY IN
OUR HANDS. SUCCESSFUL PARENTING MUST BEGIN WITH THIS
FRIGHTENING AWARENESS. PLANNED AND WANTED BABIES WILL HAVE A
HEAD START IN WINNING IN THE RACE OF LIFE, BUT PARENTS
CANNOT BOW OUT BECAUSE IT DIDN'T HAPPEN THAT WAY.
WHENEVER OR HOWEVER WE ARRIVE AT THE DESTINATION OF BECOMING
PARENTS WE CAN ACCEPT IT AND DETERMINE TO BE THE BEST
PARENTS WE CAN BE. (DEUT 6:4-9 HOLY BIBLE) AND SUCCESSFUL
PARENTING WILL REQUIRE THAT WE ACCEPT THE CHALLENGE BY TAKING
AN INVENTORY OF OUR OWN LIVES, BECAUSE OUR BELIEFS AND
BEHAVIOR WILL HAVE PROFOUND IMPACT ON OUR CHILDREN ALL OF
THEIR LIVES. IT ISN'T WHAT WE GIVE THEM THAT CAN BE BOUGHT
THAT MATTERS AS MUCH AS WHAT CAN BE TAUGHT AND LEARNED AS
THEY DEPEND ON US TO POINT THEM IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.
THIS WILL REQUIRE THAT WE TEACH TRUTH BY BEING TRUTHFUL
PERSONS, TEACH WHAT IS RIGHT BY OUR BEHAVIOR AND
INSTRUCTION REGARDING RIGHT AND WRONG, TEACH THEM HOW TO
HAVE AND ENJOY LOVING RELATIONSHIPS BY RESPECTING
AND EARNING THE RESPECT OF OTHERS. AND WE MUST
DEMONSTRATE BY OUR LIVES THAT OUR FAITH IN THE CREATOR GOD
BOTH SUSTAINS US AND HOLDS US ACCOUNTABLE TO HIS PRECEPTS
THAT WE EXPECT OUR CHILDREN TO HONOR. AND PARENTS, I
ENCOURAGE YOU TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF AVAILABLE
RESOURCES SUCH AS PROFESSIONAL HELP, SUCCESSFUL MENTORS, AND
PARENTING CLASSES AND BOOKS. AND OUR HEAVENLY FATHER,
RELATES IN HIS WORD THAT CHILDREN ARE A GIFT FROM HIM
(PSA. 127:3) AND HE PROMISES: "IF YOU CALL OUT FOR INSIGHT
AND CRY ALOUD FOR UNDERSTANDING...THEN YOU WILL
FIND THE KNOWLEDGE OF GOD." (PRO. 2:3;5, DEUT 4:9-10)
ARMED WITH DIVINE KNOWLEDGE WE CAN CONFIDENTLY ACCEPT THE
CHALLENGE OF BECOMING A SUCCESSFUL PARENT. .
>WE ALWAYS APPRECIATE YOUR JOINING US ON TIME FOR HOPE
AND OUR GUEST FOR TODAY IS DR. ROB RIENOW AND WE'RE TALKING
ABOUT HIS BOOK VISIONARY PARENTING AND THE SUBTITLE
CAPTURE A GOD SIZED VISION FOR YOUR FAMILY. NOW WHEN YOU TALK
ABOUT CAPTURING A GOD SIZED VISION ROB YOU'VE REALLY
REALLY STRETCHED IT BIG TIME. GOD SIZED, THAT CAN BE PRETTY
BIG.
>AMEN. WELL I BELIEVE THAT GOD CREATED THE FAMILY TO ADVANCE
THE GOSPEL THROUGH THE WORLD. AND THAT WHEN WE PASS OUR
FAITH AND CHARACTER TO OUR CHILDREN AND IF BY GOD'S GRACE
THEY PASS THEIR FAITH AND CHARACTER TO THEIR CHILDREN
AND GENERATIONS TO COME, THIS IS GOD'S PLAN TO FILL THE
EARTH WITH HIS WORSHIPERS. IT GOES ALL THE WAY BACK TO
GENESIS CHAPTER 1. GOD DIDN'T JUST MAKE THE CHURCH TO
ADVANCE THE GOSPEL; HE MADE THE FAMILY TO ADVANCE THE
GOSPEL TOO.
>AND THAT BRINGS ME BEFORE WE GET INTO WHERE WE WANT TO GO
IN DEUTERONOMY, IT BRINGS ME TO WHERE WE ARE AS A NATION
AND WE ARE IN TROUBLE AND WE KNOW THAT. AND WOULD YOU LAY
SOME OF THE CAUSES TO WHERE WE ARE IN OUR NATION TO WHAT YOU
AND I ARE TALKING ABOUT THAT PARENTS HAVE CEASED TO BE
PARENTS? I JUST SAW, WAS IT ON TV I SAW IT LAST NIGHT OR
SOMEWHERE WHERE SOMEBODY ASKED THIS MOTHER ABOUT HER DAUGHTER
OR SOMETHING OR ASKED THE DAUGHTER ABOUT A BEHAVIOR THAT
SHE WAS ENGAGING IN AND SHE SAYS WELL MY MOTHER LEAVES
THOSE JUDGMENTS TO ME. ISN'T A LOT OF THAT HAPPENING IN OUR
HOMES TODAY THAT THE CHILDREN ARE LEFT TO PARENT THEMSELVES
SO TO SPEAK?
>YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT AND A LOT OF THE CULTURAL DISASTER
THAT WE'RE SEEING IS LINKED TO THE FAMILY. I THINK THE BIBLE
LAYS OUT A SERIES OF FIVE DOMINOES YOU KNOW MY CHILDREN
DON'T PLAY WITH DOMINOES BECAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE
BUTTONS ON THEM BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ARE. WE USED TO SET
THEM UP AND YOU KNOW DOWN THEY GO. THAT GOD CONNECTS FIVE
THINGS IN THE BIBLE THAT AS THE MAN GOES GENERALLY
SPEAKING SO GOES THE MARRIAGE. AS THE MARRIAGE GOES SO GOES
THE FAMILY. AS THE FAMILY GOES SO GOES THE CHURCH. AS THE
CHURCH GOES SO GOES THE NATION AND THE GREAT COMMISSION. SO
IF YOU'RE SATAN AND YOU WANT CHURCHES, NATIONS AND THE
GREAT COMMISSION TO BE DESTROYED WHERE DO YOU FOCUS
YOUR ENERGY? ON MEN, ON MARRIAGES AND ON FAMILIES
BECAUSE IF THOSE THINGS CRUMBLE CHURCHES AND NATIONS
CRUMBLE EVERY SINGLE TIME. AND SO THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE'RE
SEEING HAPPENING IN OUR CULTURE.
>YES AND OUR PRAYER REQUESTS THAT COME INTO TIME FOR HOPE,
ONE OF THE OUTSTANDING THINGS THAT CONTINUE TO SHOW UP IS
THAT WE'VE BEEN MARRIED 40 YEARS AND MY HUSBAND JUST LEFT
ME FOR A YOUNGER WOMAN. AND IT GOES ON AND ON AND ON THAT THE
MARRIAGES ARE BREAKING UP, LONG-TERM MARRIAGES ARE
BREAKING UP AND YES VERY OFTEN IT IS THE MAN THAT IS LEAVING
THE HOME AND THE MARRIAGE.
>AND THE ENEMY WANTS BOTH THE HEART OF THE HUSBAND AWAY FROM
THE WIFE AND THE HEART OF THE WIFE AWAY FROM HER HUSBAND.
YOU KNOW I'LL ASK WOMEN I'LL SAY YOU KNOW WHAT'S YOUR MOST
IMPORTANT MINISTRY IN THE WORLD? VERY VERY FEW MARRIED
WOMEN WILL SAY MY MOST IMPORTANT MINISTRY IN THE
WORLD IS HELPING MY HUSBAND BE A MAN OF GOD, VERY FEW. IN THE
SAME WAY VERY FEW MEN, TELL ME ABOUT WHAT'S YOUR MOST
IMPORTANT CALLING IN THE WORLD. BOY MY NUMBER ONE
MISSION IN MY LIFE IS TO LOVE AND SERVE AND LEAD MY WIFE.
AND THE CHURCH HASN'T HELPED WITH THAT FRANKLY BECAUSE WE
TELL PEOPLE THAT THE BEST THING THEY CAN DO FOR JESUS IS
GO ON A SHORT-TERM MISSION TRIP OR VOLUNTEER DOWN AT THE
FOOD PANTRY INSTEAD OF MAKE YOUR MINISTRY TO YOUR WIFE,
YOUR HUSBAND, YOUR CHILDREN YOUR NUMBER ONE PRIORITY.
>EPHESIANS 5 SAYS IT'S SO CLEARLY AND PLAINLY BUT HOW
OFTEN HAVE YOU NOTICED THAT THEY'LL USE THE FIRST PART
WHERE WOMEN ARE TO BE IN SUBMISSION TO THEIR HUSBANDS
BUT THEY DON'T GO AHEAD AND TALK ABOUT WHAT THE HUSBAND IS
TO DO FOR THE REST OF THE CHAPTER.
>YES I THINK DIFFERENT CHURCHES ARE DIFFERENT YOU
KNOW. A LOT OF CHURCHES THEY WILL JUST POUND THE GUYS INTO
OBLIVION AND THEY'LL NEVER MENTION SUBMISSION AND THEY'LL
NEVER MENTION RESPECT OR THINGS LIKE THAT BUT BOY THE
CALL IS TO THE HUSBAND FIRST. HE'S THE ONE WHO SETS THE PACE
IN THE RELATIONSHIP AND ITS EPHESIANS 5: 25 AND 26,
HUSBANDS LOVE YOUR WIVES AS CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH WHO
GAVE HIMSELF UP FOR HER. NOW HERE'S THE PURPOSE, SO YOU
HUSBANDS YOU LOVE YOUR WIVES, YOU SERVE YOUR WIVES, NOW WHY
WOULD YOU DO SUCH A THING? VERSE 26, TO MAKE HER HOLY.
ENCOURAGING SPIRITUAL LIFE IN YOUR LIFE AND THE ORDER IS SO
CRITICAL, LOVE, SERVE, LEAD. IF A MAN TRIES TO LEAD A
WOMAN'S SPIRITUALLY WITHOUT FIRST LOVING HER AND SERVING
HER, WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN?
>A REBELLION.
>ABSOLUTELY AND SO GOD LAYS IT OUT VERY VERY CLEARLY. NOW I
IN MY OWN LIFE, I LOOK AT THAT FIRST COMMAND, OKAY HUSBANDS
LOVE YOUR WIVES. I'VE GOT A LITTLE NOTE IN MY DESK DRAWER
AND IT SAYS BECAUSE GOD DEFINES LOVE FOR US IN FIRST
CORINTHIANS 13. SO MY LITTLE NOTE SAYS WELL WHEN IT COMES
TO AMY, MY WIFE, I AM PATIENT; I AM KIND, I DON'T BOAST, I
DON'T ENVY.
>IT WILL WORK FOR MARRIAGE. TOO MANY PEOPLE DON'T EVEN
EVER CONSIDER FIRST CORINTHIANS 13 AS A GUIDE FOR
A GOOD MARRIAGE.
>IT IS IT'S THE PRACTICAL ISSUES SO I'VE GOT THIS LIST
OF ALL THESE THINGS IT MEANS THAT THIS IS WHAT IT MEANS TO
LOVE MY WIFE AND EVERY DAY I FALL SHORT. EVERY DAY I FALL
SHORT BUT I'VE GOT THE LIST THERE. IT'S SUPPOSED TO DRIVE
ME TO MY KNEES. HUSBANDS HAVE TO BE ON THEIR KNEES, WIVES
HAVE TO BE ON THEIR KNEES, GOD HELP ME BE THE HUSBAND I
SIMPLY CANNOT BE ON MY OWN. HELP ME BE THE WIFE I SIMPLY
CANNOT BE ON MY OWN.
>WE HAVE TO LOOK TO THE LORD FOR EVERYTHING THAT HE TELLS
US TO DO ANYWAY. WE ARE NOT CAPABLE WITHIN OURSELVES OF
BEING THE PERSON THAT GOD WANTS US TO BE. THAT'S WHY HE
GAVE US THE HOLY SPIRIT. HE SAID HE WASN'T GOING TO LEAVE
US COMFORTLESS OR WITHOUT A COUNSELOR, DIDN'T HE? ACTUALLY
ROB YOU'VE BROUGHT IT OUT IN YOUR BOOK MORE THAN ONCE THAT
THE DEUTERONOMY PASSAGE WHERE IT REALLY GIVES SOME CLEAR-CUT
DIRECTIONS ON FAMILY WORSHIP. AND SO WE'RE LOOKING AT THESE
COMMANDMENTS THAT I GIVE YOU TODAY ARE TO BE UPON YOUR
HEARTS. THAT'S WHERE IT HAS TO BEGIN, ISN'T IT? IMPRESS THEM
ON YOUR CHILDREN, AND THAT'S WHAT YOUR BOOK IS ABOUT. AND
THEN TALK ABOUT THEM IT'S ALL DAY LONG ACTUALLY WHEN YOU
THINK ABOUT IT. WHEN YOU SIT AT HOME, WE DON'T SIT A LONG
TIME THESE DAYS BUT WE CAN SIT AT HOME CAN'T WE AND WHEN YOU
WALK ALONG THE ROAD, WE DRIVE ALONG THE ROAD THESE DAYS AND
WHEN YOU LIE DOWN AND WHEN YOU GET UP. SO IT LITERALLY
INCLUDES THE WHOLE DAY DOESN'T IT IN ONE SHAPE FORM OR
FASHION? AND YOU'VE GOT IT SET OUT AND WHAT WE'RE GOING TO
DO, WE'RE GOING TO CONTINUE THIS SUBJECT AND SHARING YOUR
BOOK NEXT WEEK. IT'S JUST TOO MUCH TO GET IN IN ONE WEEK.
AND WE'RE GOING TO PICK UP WITH THIS NEXT WEEK SO JUST
REMEMBER WHERE WE ARE AND I'M GOING TO TALK TO OUR VIEWERS A
LITTLE BIT AND CLOSE THIS WEEK'S SHOW OUT AND WE'LL PICK
UP THERE NEXT WEEK. AND THEN I DO HAVE A PRAYER REQUEST TO
SHARE WITH YOU.
>
>
>WE'RE TALKING ABOUT FAMILIES HERE AND THIS IS WHAT ROB'S
BOOK IS ABOUT VISIONARY PARENTING AND FAMILY WORSHIP.
>
>SO HERE'S A HOME WITHOUT A HUSBAND AND WITHOUT A FATHER.
>
>I CAN JUST FEEL THE PAIN OF THIS WIFE AND THESE CHILDREN.
>
>AND THAT IS THE MOST DIFFICULT TIME THAT ANY PARENT
HAS IN REARING THEIR CHILDREN IS DURING THE TEENAGE YEARS.
DO YOU AGREE WITH ME ON THAT ROB?
>ADULT CHILDREN ARE A CHALLENGE TOO.
>YES.
>
>WELL SHE'S TAKEN A VERY GOOD STEP IN GETTING THESE CHILDREN
IN COUNSELING. I WOULD HIGHLY RECOMMEND A CHRISTIAN
COUNSELOR OR A PASTORAL COUNSELOR AND WE CERTAINLY
HAVE PRAYED FOR THIS FAMILY AND WE DO PRAY THAT THE LORD,
WE KNOW THAT THE LORD IF THEY WILL STAY WITH HIM WILL SEE
FIT TO BE WITH THIS WOMAN AND THIS SITUATION. AND THEN I
HAVE A NOTE OF ENCOURAGEMENT.
>
>
>AND I THANK YOU FOR THAT ENCOURAGING NOTE. WE LIKE TO
KNOW. WE ACTUALLY WOULD BE WITHOUT A SHOW WITHOUT OUR
VIEWERS SO WE'RE VERY APPRECIATIVE OF ALL OF YOU AND
WE DO APPRECIATE THESE NOTES OF ENCOURAGEMENT. JOIN US IN
PRAYER FOR THESE PEOPLE THAT I READ THESE PRAYER REQUESTS
FROM. JOIN US IN PRAYER FOR THE MINISTRY OF TIME FOR HOPE
AND IF THE LORD SEES FIT WE CERTAINLY WOULD APPRECIATE
YOUR CONSIDERING HELPING US FINANCIALLY. SO DON'T FORGET
NEXT WEEK WE'RE GOING TO CONTINUE WITH DR. ROB RIENOW
AND HIS BOOK TITLED VISIONARY PARENTING.
>TO ORDER OUR RESOURCES, FOLLOW INFORMATION ON SCREEN.
UNTIL NEXT TIME, HAVE A GREAT WEEK AND
REMEMBER, IT IS TIME FOR HOPE.
.
.