The Micros: Episode 4 - Heads Up 4 Röfls
Uploaded by TheMicrosPoker on 31.03.2011
Transcript:
Previously on ‘The Micros’...
And now, Episode 4.
Hey Max. You know, I think there’s been a terrible misunderstanding here.
Feeling ze nerves SvedeTooth?
Look, I said some things, you said some things. How about we just shake on it and walk away?
Only a Rasenweibchen valks avay from a heads up for rolls.
Only a Rasenweibchen valks avay from a heads up for rolls.
The structure seems too fast. Shouldn’t it be Durrrr Rules? Six or seven hundred thousand hands over... maybe several years?
Enough!
Now, ve play.
Oh hell.
Six sousand.
Call.
Sirteen sousand.
What do you have, Röfls? What do you have...
Man, I’ve never seen a poker face so ice cold! Totally flat and expressionless like terrible animation.
Meh, I’ve got nothing. Tommy would let this one go. Or maybe... maybe that’s just what he wants!
Yeah, he wants me to fold my nothing! Oh yeah, screw you and your fancy haircut!
All in.
Call.
Damnit!
A brilliant ace high call on the river by Röfls takes us to our first break!
As predicted, the hunky pro is totally owning the noob.
We’re webcasting live from Hachem Stadium, home of the Pass-the-SugarBowl.
Stay tuned for Game 2 and more heads-up action that can only be described as ‘sick’!
I can’t be certain, of course, as I haven’t read the book. But I think you just got your ass triple range merged.
I don’t think I won a single pot.
Sure you did. He open folded that one hand you had aces.
The trolls were right about me. What the hell am I even doing here?
WINNING! You finally get to prove you’re not just a luckbox!
He’s a red pro!
Meh, so is Beth Shak.
No, Max is the real deal. He’s like a Made Man in the organization, so even if I could win--
Gottverdammt, I told you not to use the scheisse plastic chips!
Look, it’s loser’s outs so you get to pick the next game. Just go with what you’re good at!
So, vat game vill we play now, Chase Berger? Min-bet Madness? Zwei to Sieben Triple Draw? Follow ze Fräulein?
Settlers of Catan.
Vat? Settlers of... Is zat like Leipzig High-Low Shplit?
We agreed to play heads up for rolls. We never said it had to be poker.
Nice try, luckboxen. Can you not hear ze crowd? Zey demand more poker!
Finger Football.
Nein.
Street Fighter II.
Nein.
Street Fighter II Turbo.
Nein.
Cup Stacking.
Nein.
I'm Thinking of a Number.
"Nine".
Damn, how'd you know that?
You are shtalling for time. Choose or I--
You are shtalling for time. Choose or I--
Angry Birds.
Zat is nonsense. Birds are never angry. Vy vould zey be angry?
Well, the pigs have stolen their eggs--
VAT! Zey cannot get avay vit zis treachery! Very vell, I shall allow your silly game. And may ze blood of ze traitorous shwine run red!
Your thoughts on the match so far?
Berger may have bought himself some time, but there is no doubt in anyone's mind that the handsome German will crush him like a can of cheap hefeweizen.
What does she see in that deutch-bag?
Oh, wunderbar.
How did you get out of rehab?
Tell Chase to call it off. He’s throwing his money away!
Ha! You’ve got a lot of nerve after flushing half our bankroll down the toilet!
I took a shot at an easy target. But Chase doesn’t have a snowman’s chance in the outback.
Well, I find there’s a lot of variance in these Heads Up matches. Even a skilled player might only be a 60% favorite.
Then you don't know Max Röfls.
Just get here quick.
Though apparently lacking the motor skills needed to zip his own fly, somehow this pinhead has managed to force a rubber match against a superior opponent.
And boom goes the dynamite!
Vell played, vell played. But! You vill not save your bankroll.
It’s one to one, kemosabe. Face it - I’ve got the momentum.
Momentum! Zere is no such thing. Ahahaha! You vatch ze training videos, yet you do not understand!
What was that? Are you still talking? I’m sorry, I turned chat off.
Zere is only ze hand you are dealt. And vat a hand you have been dealt...
Answer me zis, Svedetooth. You vear ze patch, but do you really believe in destiny?
Damn straight.
I believe in schicksal - fate. Let me tell you a story.
Is it gonna be cool? Will there be bros involved?
As a matter of fact, there vill be ‘bros’.
Vere is he?
You can’t come in here.
How iz he? How is my bruzzer?
He has experienced an intense 5th street trauma causing massive intracranial hemorrhaging.
We performed emergency bankroll infusion to relieve some of the pressure, but--
But vat?
Well, I’ve never seen a bad beat this severe. Your brother might never recover.
Who did zis to you?
I vill hunt down zis drecksau. I vill make him pay his debt of blood.
Zis I shvear to you, my bruzzer. Zis I shvear to you--
Guildenshtern!
Zat fateful King of Diamonds destroyed my bruzzer’s mind. Vinner take all; vat a shtupid tournament structure.
But so it goes. Even against a better player, anysing can happen on ze river, ja? All it takes is a little... luck.
The guy knows how to work his TV time.
For ze tiebreaker game ve shall play, as zey say in my country, the Volkswagen of poker. Texas Hold’em!
Alright, NBD.
BUT! Ze king of diamonds... shall be removed from ze deck!!!
Now, let's play some poker!
And now, Episode 4.
Hey Max. You know, I think there’s been a terrible misunderstanding here.
Feeling ze nerves SvedeTooth?
Look, I said some things, you said some things. How about we just shake on it and walk away?
Only a Rasenweibchen valks avay from a heads up for rolls.
Only a Rasenweibchen valks avay from a heads up for rolls.
The structure seems too fast. Shouldn’t it be Durrrr Rules? Six or seven hundred thousand hands over... maybe several years?
Enough!
Now, ve play.
Oh hell.
Six sousand.
Call.
Sirteen sousand.
What do you have, Röfls? What do you have...
Man, I’ve never seen a poker face so ice cold! Totally flat and expressionless like terrible animation.
Meh, I’ve got nothing. Tommy would let this one go. Or maybe... maybe that’s just what he wants!
Yeah, he wants me to fold my nothing! Oh yeah, screw you and your fancy haircut!
All in.
Call.
Damnit!
A brilliant ace high call on the river by Röfls takes us to our first break!
As predicted, the hunky pro is totally owning the noob.
We’re webcasting live from Hachem Stadium, home of the Pass-the-SugarBowl.
Stay tuned for Game 2 and more heads-up action that can only be described as ‘sick’!
I can’t be certain, of course, as I haven’t read the book. But I think you just got your ass triple range merged.
I don’t think I won a single pot.
Sure you did. He open folded that one hand you had aces.
The trolls were right about me. What the hell am I even doing here?
WINNING! You finally get to prove you’re not just a luckbox!
He’s a red pro!
Meh, so is Beth Shak.
No, Max is the real deal. He’s like a Made Man in the organization, so even if I could win--
Gottverdammt, I told you not to use the scheisse plastic chips!
Look, it’s loser’s outs so you get to pick the next game. Just go with what you’re good at!
So, vat game vill we play now, Chase Berger? Min-bet Madness? Zwei to Sieben Triple Draw? Follow ze Fräulein?
Settlers of Catan.
Vat? Settlers of... Is zat like Leipzig High-Low Shplit?
We agreed to play heads up for rolls. We never said it had to be poker.
Nice try, luckboxen. Can you not hear ze crowd? Zey demand more poker!
Finger Football.
Nein.
Street Fighter II.
Nein.
Street Fighter II Turbo.
Nein.
Cup Stacking.
Nein.
I'm Thinking of a Number.
"Nine".
Damn, how'd you know that?
You are shtalling for time. Choose or I--
You are shtalling for time. Choose or I--
Angry Birds.
Zat is nonsense. Birds are never angry. Vy vould zey be angry?
Well, the pigs have stolen their eggs--
VAT! Zey cannot get avay vit zis treachery! Very vell, I shall allow your silly game. And may ze blood of ze traitorous shwine run red!
Your thoughts on the match so far?
Berger may have bought himself some time, but there is no doubt in anyone's mind that the handsome German will crush him like a can of cheap hefeweizen.
What does she see in that deutch-bag?
Oh, wunderbar.
How did you get out of rehab?
Tell Chase to call it off. He’s throwing his money away!
Ha! You’ve got a lot of nerve after flushing half our bankroll down the toilet!
I took a shot at an easy target. But Chase doesn’t have a snowman’s chance in the outback.
Well, I find there’s a lot of variance in these Heads Up matches. Even a skilled player might only be a 60% favorite.
Then you don't know Max Röfls.
Just get here quick.
Though apparently lacking the motor skills needed to zip his own fly, somehow this pinhead has managed to force a rubber match against a superior opponent.
And boom goes the dynamite!
Vell played, vell played. But! You vill not save your bankroll.
It’s one to one, kemosabe. Face it - I’ve got the momentum.
Momentum! Zere is no such thing. Ahahaha! You vatch ze training videos, yet you do not understand!
What was that? Are you still talking? I’m sorry, I turned chat off.
Zere is only ze hand you are dealt. And vat a hand you have been dealt...
Answer me zis, Svedetooth. You vear ze patch, but do you really believe in destiny?
Damn straight.
I believe in schicksal - fate. Let me tell you a story.
Is it gonna be cool? Will there be bros involved?
As a matter of fact, there vill be ‘bros’.
Vere is he?
You can’t come in here.
How iz he? How is my bruzzer?
He has experienced an intense 5th street trauma causing massive intracranial hemorrhaging.
We performed emergency bankroll infusion to relieve some of the pressure, but--
But vat?
Well, I’ve never seen a bad beat this severe. Your brother might never recover.
Who did zis to you?
I vill hunt down zis drecksau. I vill make him pay his debt of blood.
Zis I shvear to you, my bruzzer. Zis I shvear to you--
Guildenshtern!
Zat fateful King of Diamonds destroyed my bruzzer’s mind. Vinner take all; vat a shtupid tournament structure.
But so it goes. Even against a better player, anysing can happen on ze river, ja? All it takes is a little... luck.
The guy knows how to work his TV time.
For ze tiebreaker game ve shall play, as zey say in my country, the Volkswagen of poker. Texas Hold’em!
Alright, NBD.
BUT! Ze king of diamonds... shall be removed from ze deck!!!
Now, let's play some poker!