Spiritual Awakening: The Big Transition As Your Life Falls Apart - Wired For Success [Episode 25]

Uploaded by WiredForSuccessTV on 04.12.2012

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www.wiredforsuccess.tv Presented by Melanie Gabriel & Beryl Thomas [Episode 25] Spiritual
Awakening: The Big Transition as Your Life Falls Apart Spiritual Awakening: The Big Transition
As Your Life Falls Apart [Episode 25] Wired for Success TV Beryl: Hello and welcome to
another episode of Wired for Success TV. I am Beryl Thomas and with me is my co-host
Melanie Gabriel. Say hi Mel. Melanie: Hello everyone. Beryl: So today, Steve Nobel is
our very special guest. Steve is probably best known for his involvement as the director
of Alternatives in London, a not for profit organization that hosts incredible events
with internationally- known speakers such as Deepak Chopra, Byron Katie and Dr. Joe
Dispenza. Now he s in the crossroads in his life. Steve is shortly to live Alternatives
as his creative writing career takes off. Both as an author himself, he has three books
published to date and as a trainer running creative workshops throughout Europe. His
latest literary offering is called Big Transitions: Spiritual Advice for the Times When Nothing
Makes Sense and Everything Falls Apart and this gives a big clue as to what Steve is
going to share with us today. Steve experienced what many others on the planet are going through.
That is a breaking down of his old life where nothing seemed to quite fit anymore, then
this blossoming of a whole new phase of his life. So hello Steve. Steve: Hello. Hi Beryl
and Mel. Beryl: Welcome to Wired for Success. Steve: Thank you both. Melanie: Welcome Steve.
Beryl: It s lovely of you to spare some time. So Steve, you have a very interesting story.
Tell us what has been going on for you in these past two years and how did you know
that this big change was approaching? Steve: OK. Well, before two years, I ve been in a
relationship for 12 years which ended in 2010. I was living in a house which was kind of
a dream apartment. We decided, me and my ex-partner, that we wanted an apartment overlooking a
canal or lake or body of water in Central London which they re not that easy to come
by unless you spend like three [0:02:07] [Indiscernible] of a million pounds or something. I was working
in a job which was a dream job in a way. It s a job that I really wanted and got and Director
of Alternatives in a spiritual organization where I had creative freedom to take the business
any way I wanted. So this was a great life for many years. It was the most creative part
of my life and happiest part of my life I would say in many ways. But then in 2008,
I started running workshops on transition. I don t know why. I just thought, OK, it s
a good subject. Why not? I did them for about a year and a half. I learned a lot about transition
before and I ve been through transitions. So it helped me understand the transitions
I ve been through in my life like we would go through the transition of birth and adolescence
hopefully and those transitions. But I didn t know at the time I was heading for another
transition and the warning signs were there. But I kind of missed them somehow. Even though
I was teaching on transition, I missed the warning signs. I thought, Oh no, I know. I
just need to reinvent my life. I just need to reinvent my relationship, my work. I kind
of did that for a couple of years, I suppose. Well certainly when the transition started
to really hit, I really started to try and reinvent my relationship and work in earnest
but it wasn t working. So I was in love with my partner and in love with my work but actually
underneath that, I was also falling out of love with my partner and my work somehow.
It was kind of both going on at the same time. I was telling myself, No, no. I still love
this life. This is great and wonderful. I just need to reinvent it a bit. So at work,
I delegated the kind of work that I didn t want to do. I managed to do because I was
like leaving it so I found ways of doing that. I found a new creative project in the business
which kept me going for a little while. In my relationship, we were doing all kinds of
things like tantra trainings and healings of all kinds but it wasn t really working.
Then what happened, we went away for New Year, me and my partner in [0:04:16] [Indiscernible].
We did a kind of retreat where we chanted for four hours and I remember I sent this
intention which was I want everything that s not really for my higher purpose destiny
just to fall away from my life. I thought that s OK. That sounds pretty all right to
do. It s a safe, spiritual intention. We had an amazing Christmas [Indiscernible] New Year.
It was great. Come February, I had a workshop in Ireland which had been set up with a friend
in Ireland. I went there. While I was there, I had a dream that I married this woman who
had been a friend for a few years. It was like married by angels and I thought, whoa,
that s kind of a bit [0:05:01] [Indiscernible]. I came down to [Indiscernible]. She was there.
I told her. I just had this dream. We got married by angels. She just stayed in silence
for about 15 seconds and I realized in the silence that s a very stupid thing to tell
a woman, that you just dreamt about marrying her and all that. So I just kind of made light
of it. Went out [Indiscernible] beautiful coastline in Ireland. Ireland has got this
lovely, mystical coastline, very soft and beautiful coastline. A speedboat went past
and a man shouted out, Just say yes! That s me and my friend who were talking. I didn
t get what the hell he was talking about and other people laughed and said, He thinks you
re proposing to her. This was all in the same morning. So I thought the universe is something
is up. Something is up. We both felt it. I did the workshop. It was great and I left
Ireland which is fine. I came back to England thinking, Well, what has happened? We stayed
in contact over Skype and it wasn t long before she kind of said to me, You know what? I actually
do feel something for you, and that was kind of the beginning. I felt the call of my soul
in a way. It s a strange thing to say but I felt this is something I can t resist. So
I went to spoke to my partner and told her what was happening. I said, Look, this is
what s going on. And of course she was not happy but she kind of was have done enough
spiritual work to say, Look, it s up to you what you do. I went, No, no, no, of course
I m not going to go. Why would I do that? It s crazy, isn t it? She went to Italy for
I don t know her family and I went to a healer who said to me in the healing session, I pick
up romantic weekend. You have to go to some romantic weekend. I was thinking, Oh my gosh,
that s great. I was thinking about meeting this person in Ireland again and so then I
decided to go and I texted my partner. I said, m going, and she said, OK, fine. I went. Both
of us had this amazing time and I felt my heart open. I felt, oh my gosh, something
serious is happening. That was kind of it really. That was the catalyst that came in
to turn my life upside down. From there, my relationship ended amicably. We re still very
good friends. I still see her regularly. I speak to her every week. I still see my stepson
here and there and actually our relationship has improved since we ve separated actually.
He s now 16 going through [0:07:39] [Indiscernible]. Later on, I actually decided to resign from
Alternatives and the decision I made was to actually she immigrated back to America and
so she said, Why don t you marry me and come to America and live with me? So it s like,
OK. That s a big step. I know. I will come and visit you in America which is what I did.
I went to Texas which is where she s living and Texas is a quiet I don t know if you ve
been to Texas but it s not a place I normally go to. I m the kind of guy who hangs out in
spiritual cafes and goes to Glastonbury and all that. Texas is kind of hard commercial
it felt like the Canary Wharf, Houston. Houston felt like a big version of Canary Wharf. I
wasn t sure about it but I was sure of her. So I said, All right. Yes, I m coming. Let
s get married. Then so all my [0:08:37] [Indiscernible] in England were cut. So once that was agreed,
she basically left me after about two months for no reason that she could explain. Basically
the job was done. The transition was started and she had done her job. We still have been
in touch but that was the beginning so everything went home, relationship, work, all of those
[Indiscernible]. So that was the beginning in 2010. So I would say I m almost on the
other side of that transition. So the process I ve kind of had to work out what is going
on. I mean it was a really, really strong process for me and for a number of reasons.
I had within that a kundalini experience which I ve read about but never actually experienced
before. When I had the experience, it was like very full-on and it took me a while to
integrate. It wasn t something that was like, wow, I m having kundalini experiences. Like
oh my god, what is this? So everything has changed in my life. I mean I will explain
about why I see it as a transition process which my journeys kind of follow. I see a
pattern in other journeys other people has made and even in spiritual teachers. They
ve made through their kind of awakening. Big teachers like Christ and Buddha have gone
through similar patterns of awakening. The other side is they ve come to do something
and I think a lot of people are being called now. It s a time of global transition, I think,
and that s why a lot of people are going through a transition process. But I can talk about
that later. A lot of information, sorry. Melanie: I was going to cut in there. I hesitated because
it looked as if Beryl was going to say something. I was going to cut in there. You said that
you didn t notice the worrying signs for a while and I suspect people going through transition
don t notice the signs or perhaps don t understand. They just think they re having a bit of a
tragic life. So how would people notice the signs and not get confused or is there such
a thing as a tragic life? It s just belief systems. Steve: Well everyone [0:10:56] [Inaudible]
over and over again that reflect [Indiscernible] belief systems of course. The classic sign
and they re like oh god, here we are again. Here I am again. I ve encountered this one
before in different form. That s the kind of repetitive cycle people go through. But
nothing much changes. They come and go but they kind of return in the same form. The
transition comes to radically shift those core patterns. So [Indiscernible] the classic
sign is what I call the first phase of the transition is tension. Melanie: Tension did
you say? Steve: Tension. It s not like the kind of intention where I ve got a headache
or I feel a bit tense in my life. It s a kind of growing tension where there s a growing
sense of frustration, a growing also maybe a sense of maybe there s something more I
can do with my life in this. I m living this life but there s something more like a calling
maybe. But it s a deep calling. You can t always feel it totally. The tension is between
the inner life and the outer life usually. So the inner life is the life of a soul or
the life of a heart. So depending on your belief system, you could say the heart or
soul is calling you to something bigger. My frame is that we re here not as random accidents
of chemical interactions but [0:12:17] [Indiscernible] some volition into this planet. A body and
a set of circumstances are provided which are according to the choices made before birth.
Again this is just my belief system that consciousness predates birth and survives death. So we come
into this life with a set of circumstances. Those circumstances offer a combination of
support and challenge. Some circumstances are much more supportive and others are much
more challenging. That depends on what we want to get out in the life journey. For example,
I know that when I m challenged, I m more likely to rise to the occasion and when I
m totally supported, loved and everybody is going, Oh, you re so wonderful. When somebody
says no to me, I will more likely go, OK, well I m going to get around that and I m
going to make sure that happens. And I know there are other people like that. It s a kind
of typical coaching technique that if somebody has that way of running their life, you just
challenge them and they will go running in the direction they really need to go. Does
that make sense? Melanie: Yeah, yeah. So finish, finish, yeah. Steve: My life, I had a number
of challenges. So my family situation is much more challenging than supportive, I would
say, and my first marriage was more challenging and supportive in many ways. So my family
and my first wife said no to spirituality. So that was my challenge. So I had to overcome
that and I m not a Director of Alternatives and followed the spiritual life 20 years because
my family were New Age hippies. [0:13:51] [Indiscernible] said, You must be joking.
What are you doing? Go get a job. Go drink. Beryl: Yeah. Steve: The circumstances in my
outer life were ones were when I first came to spirituality, it was restriction. There
was no so I had to find a way around that. So the conflict is between the inner life.
So my inner soul was saying, Go find your spiritual journey, and my outer life was saying,
You must be joking. You ve got responsibilities. You ve got children. You ve got family. So
they re quite a strong opposition to that inner calling, wouldn t you say? In some instances,
we will have that. In different ways, people set up an outer block resistance in a calling.
That s why actually creating that life is so much more meaningful because it wasn t
like the you re born with the golden spoon in the mouth, if it makes sense. [Indiscernible]
do not ask a millionaire who s born with a golden spoon in his mouth. [Indiscernible]
and actually I ve sat with spiritual masters who ve had awakenings that they did not understand
and they cannot tell you how to get there. They do not know. They don t know how they
got there. So they re the wrong people to ask in a way because they just don t know.
Beryl: Sorry, carry on. Steve: It s the inner and outer life that manifested in many numbers
of ways. It could be [Indiscernible] work, relationships, family, any [Indiscernible]
actually block a number of things and say [0:15:25] [Inaudible]. So this is the first
stage and that tension that s growing is it s a kind of I don t know what this life is
not the life I want to live or there s something more or that tension will not go away. It
will grow and how some people deal with that is they run away from it. They go into addiction.
They go into drinking. They go into obsessive sex. They go into internet surfing. They have
to deal with this growing frustration in some way other than doing the journey. So the sign
is if somebody is resisting, they re going into a [Indiscernible] of avoidance and it
s in our culture. It s easy to avoid. Melanie: I suppose they will feel the pain a bit more
if they re resisting. Steve: They will feel the pain a bit more and that s why it gets
addictive because I have to keep finding ways to continually block that pain. That s why
there s a lot of people who go into obsessive sex or shopping or whatever because their
life is painful and the core of it is painful but their mind says, This is your duty. You
have to do this. So it sets up a tremendous tension. Some people kept holding that their
whole lifetime. It s possible to do that but I think the nature of the time we re in this
2012 and this New Age of Aquarius we re birthing into is much, much harder. In the 50s my parents
could do it. My father and mother were not happy in their marriage. They could hold it
together. It was fine for them. Melanie: You mean they could pretend to be OK. Steve: Yeah.
Melanie: Much more easily than we do now. Steve: In those days, the kind of external
pressures or external, cultural was much stronger. You get a divorce and leave your children.
That was in the 50s. It s like unheard of more now. Now it s kind of, OK, all right.
Well you have to do it. Follow your hear type of thing. But in those days, it was very,
very hard. So my father would regularly go and drink as we re dealing with it or do what
he had to do. My mother would do what she had to do. Melanie: Clean the house probably.
Steve: Yeah, classic eventually she had a midlife crisis. She was ice skating [0:17:37]
[Indiscernible] she s kind of crazy. But we went, OK, mom, if you want to do ice skating,
go and do it. So yeah, that s the classic sign is tension and it depends where you re
at in your life as well. It s another aspect of that whether you re an adolescent or in
your mid-50s. It would [Indiscernible]. Melanie: And I expect the external transitions which
are going on like the economy downturn and technological changes and other things will
weaken those bonds that were so strong in the 50s. Steve: Yeah. Melanie: And perhaps
accelerate the fact that you just can t keep holding on to what s familiar. So basically
you re saying you needed a bit of a stick, a bit of a kick up the rear. Steve: Yeah.
Melanie: To just flow with the transition. Steve: Yeah. Melanie: Are there some of us
who don t need a kick? Can some of us just be inspired by for example watching your example?
Steve: Yeah. Well there are two types of transitions. The first type is purely biological. The adolescent
transition with the rush of hormones. There s the [Indiscernible] return at 28, 29. There
are a number of kind of biological and astrological that come. Midlife is a very strong one usually.
Adolescence and midlife are two very and [0:19:00] [Indiscernible] the three really strong points
of transition, I would say. So there s the biological one. The second one is the transition
that comes of her own volition, the heroic transitions where we go I feel there s something
more that s calling me. I know I m going to try and follow it. So the tension doesn t
need to build very far because you get a tension to the sense of something more and you go,
m going to follow it no matter what. And people do that. I m going to just leave and change
country. I m going to change career. I m going to change the relationship. I m going to start
a business. I m going to get married, have a child. From conscious volition, that is
a very different journey to the one where you re resistant. But even that one, we can
resist the calling. Like to start a business or let s say to get married is a calling.
You have a friend who s [Indiscernible] and I used to tease him because he had this kind
of phobic resistance not to [Indiscernible] but to commitment. I actually introduced him
to his wife and that was it. It was end game for him. Melanie: I almost said he probably
will never forgive you but it just depends on how it s working out. Steve: The third
type of transition is the unbidden type of transition. So ones, which are unexpected
to come out of the blue which are different from the heroic ones because the heroic ones
we choose. These ones we did not choose. We resist so much that eventually a catalyst
has to come out of the blue and hit us full force to kick us on the journey. So in my
case, the catalyst was this woman, the lover, but for other people it could be an accident.
It could be redundancy. It could be a divorce. It could be an illness. It could be the death
of a loved one. These are all powerful catalysts that kick us on our journey. So the unbidden
adventure is probably more difficult because we are kicking and screaming all the way.
This one can lead us so the first stage of tension we avoid as far as we can. We do everything
we can to avoid it. A catalyst comes along and starts kicking us on the way. I mean all
transitions go through the phase of disintegration where even if you choose the journey, your
old life starts to fall away. If I choose to get married, my old single life goes some
of my single friends might go. My bachelor pad might. If I don t choose the journey,
things start falling away in a sense because there s a loss of meaning. There s a loss
of connection. In my transition which was unexpected and unbidden, my passion for Alternatives
went. My passion for my last relationship, my love for her started to go. I was trying
to fight it but it was going. My love for my life, my old life was going actually because
there was another life calling me. But I was resisting it like crazy. In the disintegration,
it can be very, very difficult because when things fall away, it feels like oh my god,
my life is not making sense anymore. Things are dropping away from me. My friends are
leaving. When my transition happened, three very, very close friends left me at the same
time. They moved out of London or just said, I can t speak to you at the moment. I don
t know. They just left. They ve come back in a different way. A lot of my kind of things
I was doing didn t make sense anymore. I stopped doing them. What else could I say? I stopped
falling in love with the house I was in love with. I knew we had to sell it and leave it.
So things dropped away. It s like approaching winter, autumn. The leaves fall away from
the trees to make space for a new bud. Without autumn and then winter, no spring. So it s
an essential part of the process of seeing things drop away. The next phase is really
winter where this kind of like things have died and left you and now you re in this kind
of what some spiritual teachers call a void or some called a neutral zone or some call
the wilderness. Actually I like the term the wilderness because it describes how I feel
about it. It s like, Where am I? It s my uncharted territory. In this place, the game rules can
shift a bit. Like what particularly you were saying about the patterns just spiraling around
again and again. Here s this pattern again and again. In the wilderness, it s like that
pattern shifts dramatically because you can actually see, oh my god, I ve been doing that
in my life all the time. What am I doing? ve been dating those kinds of men. Why didn
t I see that before? I ve been limiting myself. I ve been scared of being too visible or whatever
it is. In the wilderness is a time of fallow, of reflection, of face shadow. You know the
shadow. Beryl: Sure. Steve: Of things we pressed about ourselves which is either light or dark.
This is what we re afraid of or ashamed of or what we think is too amazing about this
and the potential which we kept at bay because if we let it go, it could be we feel it s
dangerous for us in some way. That might not make any sense. You might think, Well, why
would I do that? But most of us do that because when we re young, we grow up and we realize
some things about this. It s just too much for the people around us. At school, we might
be accused of being too smart. I mean too intelligent, too beautiful, too creative.
A friend of mine who s a personal development trainer was telling a story about his two
daughters, both highly creative. One at the age of five painted on his white wall of his
beautiful house a picture. Daddy, here s a picture for you. Daddy went mad. Daughter
of five never pursued her creative talents anymore. Her sister became an artist. She
suppressed her ability. You can see why because she got her father exploded with anger about
her doing some amazing and creative drawing. So a lot of us go through that. Like you could
be kicked out of the choir at school, so I will never sing again or it could be when
I was younger, I was so ashamed around my sexuality so I was never sexual again really.
I was afraid to be too sexual or the kids at my school in my class were not that bright.
So when I got a bit ahead, everyone pulled me back and I might have got beaten up for
being too clever. People get bullied for that kind of thing. So do you see or Beryl: Yeah.
Steve: There s all kinds of things. Beryl: Yeah. What I want to ask you there Steve is,
In that wilderness, is that what some people would call like the dark night of the soul
where they go really deeper than they thought was even possible? Steve: Yeah. Well, in what
I call a big transition, which usually has a spiritual element. Not all transitions have
a dark night of the soul. The ones where we get radically shaken the egos get radically
shaken up tends to have a dark night of the soul aspect because the ego is important in
the kind of defrag. The soul is going, your ego has served you up to now but now it needs
to be kind of computer speak defragged. Some parts of it need to be updated. Some parts
need to be shelved, deleted, and of course we experience the world through our personality
and if that personality has been shaken up, we just don t know who we are anymore. We
re like so that [0:26:35] [Indiscernible] dark night of the soul. Another sign of the
dark night of the soul is all sense of intuition goes. All sense of gut instinct goes. All
sense of connection to a greater source goes. So if you re a spiritual person that feels
guided in the world and you go in the dark night, suddenly that s powerful. You don t
know where you will go. You don t know what you re doing. That was my experience. I had
the dark night of the soul which lasted many months and all sense of intuition and my intuition
is very, very strong [Indiscernible]. Then suddenly I realize I m in the world and I
don t know how to move in the world. I don t move intellectually. I don t obsess with
my options and systemize everything and I don t make choices that way. I just feel it
and go, That s the right way. I also run alternatives that way. One week, we get dozens of proposals
and I would instantly know that one, that one, not that one, not that one. Check it
out and usually 95 percent of the time accurate I would say. The Alternatives because a successful
organization based on intuition. An example of that would be back in 2002 or 2003 I think
it was. We got a phone call to the Alternatives office and we were asked. My colleague took
a call and a publisher came on and said, ve got a new author called Eckhart Tolle. Do
you want to put him on? Richard said, Has anybody heard of Eckhart Tolle? And a very
[Indiscernible] said just that guy. I had such a strong feeling in my body immediately
and he went, Really? Why? I said, I don t know. Just book him. We booked him. He came
three times. He sold out three or four times, I think. He sold out. Biggest selling [0:28:15]
[Indiscernible] in the world now. This was before he nobody knew of him. So it s that
kind of thing. I kind of just knew because Alternatives was almost bankrupt actually
back then in 2000 when I took it on. So I was asking spirit at that time, Show me the
way who to employ and what speakers to bring in. It did consistently, all the time, and
I got to trust it and just rely on it and take it for granted. So in 2010, after 10
years of solid, amazing results, suddenly it disconnected. I didn t know what to fit.
It had gone. I can t tell you how difficult an experience that was. So intuition gone,
sense of connection source gone. I had to rely on just [Indiscernible] and see. That
was the only all right, I will just try it. Does it work? No. OK. Does it work? No. Oh,
I went down many, many dark alleys but cautiously because I knew that I m not going to run down
any particular alley. So even when the person from America who just dropped me, I had no
sense of knowing that was coming. I would normally have known something is up but just
then dropped. So that s the dark night of the soul. Most mystics would talk about John
of the Cross. Thomas Moore, a modern day kind of mystic who talks about it. There s another
guy. I forget his name now. There s three people I think who have very excellent books.
Tom Bunion [Phonetic] I think has written books on dark [Indiscernible]. John of the
Cross and Thomas Moore, modern day mystics and [0:29:54] [Indiscernible] who s now dead.
They know about the spirits. It s radical but on the other side the dark night of the
soul is a rebirth which is after the [Indiscernible]. So if you ve gone through the dark night of
the soul, the potential is rebirth, spiritual rebirth. A lot of spiritual teachers [Indiscernible].
Byron Katie was out [Indiscernible] and crawling on the floor just to approach [Indiscernible].
A lot of people hit rock bottom before they awaken. Not everyone but Christ at the desert
facing the temptations, Buddha facing the demon Maya. It s like facing all your radical
inner demons. So it s just a kind of I don t really think that a guy with horns appeared
to Jesus in the desert. I think him facing everything dark that s inside that had to
be cleared and Buddha as well before they can really go on their mission. So what I
m finding on the other side of this dark night is that my intuition is firing up again with
more kind of power than before. I can sit opposite people now and kind of put my finger
on things much, much faster than before. My sense of connection is growing again just
in time, right? Because winter solstice is almost here. So I want to be kind of back
in some form of connection before we go sailing into 2013. So all of this is going on now
because of the global situation which is we re heading through to a new paradigm shift
and there are a number of people who are the advance guard for this I think, who are aware
of what s going on and embracing it. And the massive people, probably 98 percent of people
in the world are oblivious to what s going on spiritually. They know that at a kind of
physical level, systems are changing. Banks are kind of wobbling. Governments are shifting.
Arab Spring is happening. Loss of trust in our banks. Governments do not have the same
re not so obedient to governments as we were before. The 60s really started all that really.
Also the global village, the internet is opening us up to well the news has not been it has
been so biased and so focused on what s wrong with the world. Now with the internet, we
can open up and see there s such a different picture going on, that young people don t
trust in those. They go to Twitter or Facebook to find out what s really going on actually.
If people were like in Iran was that the green spring or the green rising? In Iran that didn
t actually work out. If you really wanted to find out people who are posting on social
media, so you really knew it was going on, don t trust the media because I mean the Iranian
government will tell you what s really going on. Our government doesn t always tell you
what s going on. They have issues of national security they don t want to tell you. So things
are getting more transparent now which is how it s going because young people are demanding
more transparency. They re demanding more say. They re not willing to put up with the
same old crap as before. They re not like marching to the sound of the drum like before.
Like my grandfathers were both in the army, king, country and all that. Very few people
would do that now. Beryl: It seems like these young people, Steve, and I have two sons who
are just in their early 20s myself. They don t seem to have this kind of deep patterning
that people of our generation have, do they? Steve: No. [Crosstalk] Steve: Yeah. Yeah,
yeah. I think there s a lot of people who have come in who do not seem to have that
patterning in a way partly because a lot of that pattern has been broken since the 60s
where people like our generation have actually done some work in ourselves. So actually the
children that have come in have not have to deal with the same crap completely. Carl Jung
said that the children are destined to live out the unfulfilled dreams of the parents.
We re also destined to live out the unfulfilled programs or unfulfilled frustrations of the
parents. The more we take courageous steps, step out, embrace a new world, a new way of
living, the more we will free our children. But particularly our grandchildren I would
say because our children are looking to go, Well, mom, you re a little bit weird but we
still love you. Wow, that s so amazing or when I look at my grandchildren, they kind
of look at me and they re like much, much freer than my children will ever potentially
be, I guess. Beryl: Yeah. Steve: Because I made the journey. I m a resource for them
and because [0:34:45] [Indiscernible] you re a resource for your descendants, if not
your immediate children because they re the ones who are going to really I think the grandchildren
would really take the next step. I think our world has started on a major shift that has
happened since the 60s but it s accelerating now in 2012. Now that I m fixated on the year
but I think 2012 and a few years coming up is a critical time because the world is facing
so many critical problems. We either solve them or die. You solve the ecological problem
or the planet goes. You solve the energy crisis or the planet goes. It would be war. I mean
all wars fall over energy nowadays, Middle East s energy. So they re not there because
they love the Afghanistan people. They re there because of energy and because of strategic
designs on the region. All of that is becoming much, much more transparent to people now.
When they look at it, they go, We know why they re there. We don t buy the old bullshit
that the government [0:35:47] [Indiscernible] to us. We know why they went into Iraq. They
went into Afghanistan, all of that. It s becoming more and more obvious to people but our grandchildren
really for them, what kind of world will they live in? Is it going to be a world of free
energy for example which is possible? The technology for free energy is already there.
It has been there since probably [Indiscernible]. I would say. In Alternatives, we ve had scientists,
ex-NASA scientists come and talk about free energy devices where we transform m not talking
about sun power. I m talking about technology that actually gives free energy, with very
little energy input. The technology has been around there for [Indiscernible] blocked consistently
by big corporations because there s money in oil. They ve invested billions in it. They
re not going to give it up just like that. If anybody is really interested in the subject,
they should research the life of Nikola Tesla who was I think [0:36:44] [Indiscernible].
The whole electric system now is a result of Tesla, not Edison. Edison invented the
light bulb but his ideas for how electricity was going to was very different from Tesla
s. Tesla s idea is one but if you look at Tesla s ideas, he was into [Indiscernible].
He lit a city. It s documented. It s true, or a town in America without any cables. He
sent electric charges through the air and through the earth to light up the town. Now
he went apparently the story goes his investor who invested in it was JP Morgan, the banker.
Story goes that he went to JP Morgan and says, I know how to give free energy to the world,
and strangely within a week, his laboratory was smashed and all his patents were blocked.
Strange. But basically it was like the world was not ready for free energy. But really
energy is one of the crucial things of how the world will evolve 20, 30 years and this
will resolve this issue unless free energy becomes more available. Like the free internet,
education. Imagine free energy. All will be transformed really. There s no more a need
to fight over energy resources. So what we re doing now is going to the path of the planet
is really going to be determining what to do now in these next few years. Are we going
to choose freedom, free communication, free energy, spiritual awakening or are we going
to choose tyranny? Which is I think the option really. One world government, one world banking
systems but owned by people of dubious intention. Then we re in trouble. But I think the young
people are not going to stand for that. They want transparency, openness and that means
we re standing at crossroads and we can go anyway really. But a number of people are
going through transition and they re opening up and so they re kind of clearing out the
inner feng shui you can say. They re clearing out the inner stuff and they can then see
the world clearly and see the world as our ancestors did. Tribal cultures and deep ancestors
took decisions for the benefit of seven generations. We don t do that now. Tribal culture would
say if we come to make a decision, they would look at it and they would say, How does this
affect the tribe seven generations time? Now we make decisions based on what? Nuclear power
stations. We don t think about seven generations. We think about the next five years. How much
money will that make in five years? ve got immediate problems that need immediate solutions.
There s no long term visioning at all. That s why we need to shift our focus because I
think really it s the most crucial decade we re going to face the next 10 years really.
Beryl: So as it s happening in the outside world, so is it happening in the inner world,
Steve. Steve: Yeah. As within, so without. As above, so below. The old Hermetic saying
from the Emerald Tablet, wasn t it? Yes, more and more people are embracing this old adage
that the outer world does reflect here in the world. People talk about the law of attraction
but it s like in the 90s, they would say we create a reality. We are creating our reality,
our world. The more people [0:40:06] [Indiscernible] together and switch off the dark media, stop
watching horror films. Can you imagine the impact in the world of 10 million people watching
a horror file all at the same time. America now is really hooked on apocalyptic visions.
What happens? 9/11. We ve got to kind of mass level start moving away from those kinds of
things. So the actual if the planet was focused on much more uplifting visions, uplifting
things which is starting to happen. There are films coming through much more uplifting,
messages coming through more uplifting. The world will shift and I m seeing in Alternatives,
people in their 20s joining the Alternatives volunteers team like awakened [Indiscernible]
and these ones are going to determine the world. They re really awakened as I would
say I am now but in the age of 25. I m like how are they doing that? I think a lot of
souls are coming to the planet almost more awakened now. I m like, I just don t know
how you do that. When I was 25, I was lost in the world. Your wisdom is just incredible.
So just [Inaudible]. Beryl: So Steve, I m wondering. You ve obviously been through an
incredible time these last couple of years. What is the biggest thing that you ve learned
about yourself through all of that to give hope to others that perhaps are going through
their dark night right now? Steve: Yeah. I think the biggest things to learn of an unbidden
transition is around the awakening process is like [0:41:42] [Inaudible] go into the
chrysalis which is the dark and not be afraid of the dark. On the other side is the butterfly
positioned and biologists have studied the caterpillar and they found that actually what
happens in the biology of the caterpillar is that [Inaudible] new cells start to form
called imaginative cells. These are like the new caterpillar forming in the the new butterfly
forming in the caterpillar and the caterpillar s immune system attacks those cells thinking
they re the enemy. But they keep coming again and again and again until these new cells
start to overwhelm the old caterpillar and it surrenders and becomes the caterpillar.
Now I think surrender is a big part of it. Even if you s normal to resist the process.
Eventually trust and surrender is the way through. You won t find your way through by
planning it, strategy or left brain linear thinking. You go through surrender trust and
probably courage as well. You need a certain amount of courage to embrace the process,
even if that s a conscious heroic transition. You need courage to say, Oh, I will do it.
[0:42:49] [Inaudible] you need a certain amount of courage but you also need to surrender
throughout the process. Beryl: So when fear comes up as I m sure must come in these situations,
would you go as far as saying embrace the fear, make a friend of that fear rather than
resist it? Steve: Yes. You probably need if you re very, very new to the process, this
is the first time you ve hit something big, you probably would need to go out and hear
from people like Wayne Dyer or people who have been through some of this, to read or
hear. I mean I think his film The Shift is particularly very good. I recommend Wayne
Dyer s film The Shift. You can get I on Amazon for five quid I think. That s particularly
good particularly for people later in life going through a massive shift. For people
who are at any stage, Fee the Fear and Do It Anyway is a great book. It s a fantastic
book. Support is essential if you even if you ve been through it before, you need support.
Like I go to Alternatives every week. I listen to poetry, CDs. Things actually help me go
through the transition. I meet with friends who have an understanding but it may be that
you find yourself in a place that you have no friends, no support and then you go, What
do I do now? You ve got to find it. You ve got to find it. Support is essential. You
need to find some sense of encouragement. Otherwise, if the fear overwhelms you, you
will go into resistance and you will try and avoid it. What can I say? One of the lessons
of the transition is around the Buddhist idea of the law of impermanence. Everything is
impermanent and it s a hard thing to grasp but even the things you love, you have to
surrender and let go of. I was with a friend today who is in a big transition, lost a dear,
dear friend a year ago exactly to the week. And that s her transition but I m [0:44:45]
[Inaudible] because she still can t let that friend go. m saying to her, Look, you have
to let her go. She s kind of a little bit stuck and she knows she s kind of going around
and around. Impermanence, let people go. She has got her own journey this friend who has
passed on. The more she can let go, the more she can this friend will be able to live her
own life. Impermanence and non-attachment which is very, very easy in theory but the
practice is harder especially where love is concerned [Inaudible]. But there s a fine
line between love and attachment. You have to find [Indiscernible] attachment to your
old life that you love, attachment to the person you love. You have to let go. It doesn
t mean you don t love them anymore because we think, well if I let them go, I didn t
love them. That s [Inaudible]. You can love them and give them distance and love them
and just let them have space and love them and let them grow in their own way. It s a
classic thing parents do. I love my children and therefore I have to help them choose their
life or choose their direction or control them. The greatest love you can do with children
is hold the space and let them grow in their own way. That love and attachment, you know.
As parents particularly learn it or [0:45:56] [Indiscernible]. I give my husband space to
grow and still love him and be there. It s a dance, isn t it? We have to [Inaudible].
There s no easy solution. I can t say here s a solution in three steps but I can say
[Indiscernible] you need to look at. Does that make sense? Beryl: It makes perfect sense.
It makes perfect sense and I think it will give hope to a lot of people, Steve, that
are finding themselves in a similar dilemma. Steve: I m making it [Indiscernible] and this
has been the hardest transition I ve ever made in my life. A couple of points, I was
going to jump in the river honestly. I was standing in the Thames and I thought it s
easy to jump in than do this transition. But I m still here. I get to breathe [Inaudible]
is wonderful. Very simple breath. Buddhist breath practice is fantastic. A daily rounding
in the body is wonderful. It helps with fear as well actually. Melanie: So in the book,
you give some ideas that can support people who are going through this, do you? Steve:
Well I ve just written the book called The Enlightenment of Work which is our transition
in work. If anyone is going through a transition at work, they can buy that book and that will
help them. But if they re going for an all-embracing transition where everything is up for grabs,
then writing a book now won t be [0:47:18] [Indiscernible]. I m doing talks on it here
and there around London. I will probably do another one in the new year but nothing is
set yet. I just did one last week. Eighty or ninety people turned out and there was
such an engagement with the subject. I realized people are really interested. Beryl: Well,
we re mindful of your time Steve. We know you ve got lots of writing to do. Well I m
sure people are going to want to find out more about your story. Where can they get
in touch with you, Steve? Steve: My website is HYPERLINK "http://www.SteveNobel.com" www.SteveNobel.com
. If you go on there, there s access to my blog. There s access to podcasts where I ve
interviewed other people or I m being interviewed. There are videos as well there. You could
find me on Twitter under London_Has_Soul. Beryl: Right. Steve: On Facebook, you could
find me again, through my website, you will find me on Facebook and Twitter actually.
So you can find me [Inaudible]. Beryl: Yeah. There s some very interesting podcasts. They
look really fabulous on your site. They do look good. Steve: Yeah. Beryl: Great topics,
great topics that will enhance everything that you ve talked about today. Sorry, Melanie.
Off you go. Melanie: No, no, no. You ve summed up what I was going to say. Also Steve, you
would be willing to come back and answer comments if people want to ask you questions as a result
of this conversation. Steve: Sure. Melanie: Yeah. Beryl: And actually, will you come back
in a few months time and talk to us again? Because I m sure life will have moved on for
you again and tell us about more of your journey. Steve: [Indiscernible] actually. Yeah. Melanie:
Yeah. Oh you must because we could have gone on and on but Beryl: Lots of topics, lots
of areas we got into there, Steve. Melanie: Yeah. Beryl: You re a wealth of information.
Thank you so much. Melanie: Yeah, it has been great. Thank you very much indeed. So thank
you everyone for tuning in to today s episode of HYPERLINK "http://www.WiredforSuccess.TV"
http://www.WiredforSuccess.TV . We would just like to mention before we wrap up that if
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to tune in for the next episode of Wired for Success where we help you to master the seven
areas of life. So from me Mel and my co-host Beryl, and from our interviewee Steve, we
bid you farewell and next time. So ladies, if you would like to say good-bye. Copyright:
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