Born To Be Free: Episode 4: Surrender

>> DR. KARL YOUNG WHO IS ONE OF OUR MOST FAMOUS
OF OUR MOST FAMOUS PSYCHOLOGISTS OF ALL TIME HE
PSYCHOLOGISTS OF ALL TIME HE HIMSELF SAID HE COULDN'T CURE
HIMSELF SAID HE COULDN'T CURE ALCOHOLISM.
ALCOHOLISM. HE SAID MEDICINE DOESN'T HAVE
HE SAID MEDICINE DOESN'T HAVE THE ANSWER.
THE ANSWER. >> I DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE
>> I DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE THIS.
THIS. I CAN'T STOP.
I CAN'T STOP. I JUST CAN'T.
I JUST CAN'T. AND HELPED TO GET ME BACK INTO
AND HELPED TO GET ME BACK INTO DRUGS SO HE PULLED OUT HIS
DRUGS SO HE PULLED OUT HIS NEEDLE AND DRUGS AND PUT A
NEEDLE AND DRUGS AND PUT A TURN KIT AROUND HIS AROUND AND
TURN KIT AROUND HIS AROUND AND SHOT UP8DHT IN FRONT OF ME
SHOT UP8DHT IN FRONT OF ME AND I HAD NO PULL, NO PULL
AND I HAD NO PULL, NO PULL WHATSOEVER.
WHATSOEVER. ¶AMAZING GRACE
¶AMAZING GRACE ¶ HOW SWEET THE SOUND
¶ HOW SWEET THE SOUND ¶ I ONCE WAS LOST, BUT NOW I'M
¶ I ONCE WAS LOST, BUT NOW I'M FREE.
FREE. >> HI I'M LAVERNE TRIPP.
>> HI I'M LAVERNE TRIPP. WELCOME TO BORN TO BE FREE.
WELCOME TO BORN TO BE FREE. THIS EPISODE IS ONE OF THE
THIS EPISODE IS ONE OF THE MOST FRIGHTENING EPISODES
MOST FRIGHTENING EPISODES THERE PROBABLY WILL BE.
THERE PROBABLY WILL BE. HOWEVER, IT IS ONE OF THE MOST
HOWEVER, IT IS ONE OF THE MOST BENEFICIAL.
BENEFICIAL. TO THINK AND TO COME TO THE
TO THINK AND TO COME TO THE PLACE WHERE WE MAKE A DECISION
PLACE WHERE WE MAKE A DECISION TO SURRENDER EVERYTHING TO
TO SURRENDER EVERYTHING TO GOD.
GOD. THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S RIGHT. BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT?
BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT? AS YOU LISTEN TO THE STORIES
AS YOU LISTEN TO THE STORIES OF THE PEOPLE THAT'S ON THIS
OF THE PEOPLE THAT'S ON THIS WEEK AND I'LL BE SHARING TOO
WEEK AND I'LL BE SHARING TOO JUST A LITTLE BIT LATER, I
JUST A LITTLE BIT LATER, I HOPE YOU REACH THE PLACE YOU
HOPE YOU REACH THE PLACE YOU SURRENDER YOUR ALL, BECAUSE I
SURRENDER YOUR ALL, BECAUSE I PROMISE YOU, THERE'S NO LIFE
PROMISE YOU, THERE'S NO LIFE LIKE LIVING A LIFE THAT'S
LIKE LIVING A LIFE THAT'S SURRENDERED AND GOD TAKES
SURRENDERED AND GOD TAKES CONTROL.
CONTROL. STAY TUNED BECAUSE YOU WERE
STAY TUNED BECAUSE YOU WERE BORN TO BE FREE.
BORN TO BE FREE. >> THE SURRENDER ISSUE IN
>> THE SURRENDER ISSUE IN GAMBLING.
GAMBLING. >> WELL, YOU KNOW, I THINK
>> WELL, YOU KNOW, I THINK THAT WHEN YOU'VE GOT A BULLET
THAT WHEN YOU'VE GOT A BULLET HOLE IN EVERY SQUARE INCH OF
HOLE IN EVERY SQUARE INCH OF YOUR BODY YOU HAVE NO CHOICE
YOUR BODY YOU HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO SURRENDER.
BUT TO SURRENDER. I THINK THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED
I THINK THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED TO GAMBLING.
TO GAMBLING. I HAD LOST EVERYTHING.
I HAD LOST EVERYTHING. I WAS IN BANKRUPTCY COURT FOR
I WAS IN BANKRUPTCY COURT FOR SEVEN YEARS PAYING OFF
SEVEN YEARS PAYING OFF BANKRUPTCY.
BANKRUPTCY. TWO YEARS IN ALABAMA AND FIVE
TWO YEARS IN ALABAMA AND FIVE YEARS IN TENNESSEE.
YEARS IN TENNESSEE. I USED TO WATCH THE OLD JOHN
I USED TO WATCH THE OLD JOHN WAYNE MOVIES WHERE HE WAVED
WAYNE MOVIES WHERE HE WAVED THE WHITE FLAG TO SURRENDER
THE WHITE FLAG TO SURRENDER AND HE SURRENDERED AND I
AND HE SURRENDERED AND I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT I WOULD
ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT I WOULD DIE IF I SURRENDERED.
DIE IF I SURRENDERED. BUT I REALLY HAD NOWHERE TO GO
BUT I REALLY HAD NOWHERE TO GO BUT TO THE LORD.
BUT TO THE LORD. >> CONSTANCE, YOU CAN LIVE
>> CONSTANCE, YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT ALCOHOL.
WITHOUT ALCOHOL. YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT DRUGS.
YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT DRUGS. YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT
YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT PORNOGRAPHY.
PORNOGRAPHY. IT'S REALLY TOUGH TO LIVE
IT'S REALLY TOUGH TO LIVE WITHOUT FOOD.
WITHOUT FOOD. DOES THAT BRING SOME DIFFERENT
DOES THAT BRING SOME DIFFERENT ISSUES TO SURRENDER?
ISSUES TO SURRENDER? >> WELL, YEAH, I MEAN IT
>> WELL, YEAH, I MEAN IT COMPLICATES ISSUES, FOR SURE.
COMPLICATES ISSUES, FOR SURE. THAT'S THE BIGGEST PROBLEM.
THAT'S THE BIGGEST PROBLEM. YOU CANNOT SIMPLY LAY DOWN AND
YOU CANNOT SIMPLY LAY DOWN AND TURN AWAY FROM FOOD.
TURN AWAY FROM FOOD. YOU HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO
YOU HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO BALANCE THE ROLE THAT FOOD
BALANCE THE ROLE THAT FOOD PLAYS IN YOUR LIFE.
PLAYS IN YOUR LIFE. IT'S A VERY MUCH ONGOING DAILY
IT'S A VERY MUCH ONGOING DAILY THING.
THING. THE SURRENDERING THING--I
THE SURRENDERING THING--I THINK I FIND IT DIFFICULT TO
THINK I FIND IT DIFFICULT TO SURRENDER ANYTHING TO GOD.
SURRENDER ANYTHING TO GOD. IT'S JUST A REALLY, REALLY
IT'S JUST A REALLY, REALLY HARD THING TO DO, BECAUSE I'M
HARD THING TO DO, BECAUSE I'M INDEPENDENT AND CAN I DO THIS
INDEPENDENT AND CAN I DO THIS AND THAT AND THIS WORKS, AND I
AND THAT AND THIS WORKS, AND I FIND ESPECIALLY LATELY, OF
FIND ESPECIALLY LATELY, OF COURSE, THE CLOSER YOU GET TO
COURSE, THE CLOSER YOU GET TO HIM THE CLOSER HE DRAWS YOU TO
HIM THE CLOSER HE DRAWS YOU TO HIM.
HIM. AND LATELY HE'LL JUST KEEP
AND LATELY HE'LL JUST KEEP BRINGING ME TO MY KNEES.
BRINGING ME TO MY KNEES. THINGS WON'T BE RIGHT AND I'LL
THINGS WON'T BE RIGHT AND I'LL BE DOWN ON MY KNEES
BE DOWN ON MY KNEES SURRENDERED.
SURRENDERED. AND THERE'S SOMETHING VERY
AND THERE'S SOMETHING VERY COMFORTING ABOUT BEING IN THAT
COMFORTING ABOUT BEING IN THAT PLACE, BECAUSE WHEN YOU'RE
PLACE, BECAUSE WHEN YOU'RE DOWN ON YOUR KNEES THERE'S
DOWN ON YOUR KNEES THERE'S REALLY NOT MUCH FARTHER TO
REALLY NOT MUCH FARTHER TO FALL.
FALL. >> I WOKE UP THIS MORNING
>> I WOKE UP THIS MORNING INCREDIBLY STRESSED OUT ABOUT
INCREDIBLY STRESSED OUT ABOUT PROJECTS I HAVE TO GET DONE
PROJECTS I HAVE TO GET DONE AND TIME MANAGEMENT PROBLEMS
AND TIME MANAGEMENT PROBLEMS AND THE TAPING TODAY AND
AND THE TAPING TODAY AND THINKING HOW IS EVERYTHING
THINKING HOW IS EVERYTHING GOING TO WORK OUT.
GOING TO WORK OUT. AND I REALLY FELT GOD REMINDED
AND I REALLY FELT GOD REMINDED ME WHEN WE TALK ABOUT
ME WHEN WE TALK ABOUT SURRENDERING TO HIM, WE'RE NOT
SURRENDERING TO HIM, WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT SURRENDERING TO
TALKING ABOUT SURRENDERING TO A REALLY NICE SET OF
A REALLY NICE SET OF PRINCIPLES THAT WE HOPE WILL
PRINCIPLES THAT WE HOPE WILL WORK.
WORK. CHRISTIANITY IS NOT JUST ABOUT
CHRISTIANITY IS NOT JUST ABOUT THESE GUIDELINES WE FOLLOW TO
THESE GUIDELINES WE FOLLOW TO LIVE A CHRISTIAN LIFE.
LIVE A CHRISTIAN LIFE. THIS IS A RELATIONSHIP.
THIS IS A RELATIONSHIP. I FELT HE WAS REMINDING ME I'M
I FELT HE WAS REMINDING ME I'M AN ACTIVE AGENT IN YOUR LIFE.
AN ACTIVE AGENT IN YOUR LIFE. YOU CAN CAST YOUR CARE UPON
YOU CAN CAST YOUR CARE UPON ME.
ME. I DO CARE ABOUT YOU.
I DO CARE ABOUT YOU. I FIND THE MORE I WORK ON
I FIND THE MORE I WORK ON INTIMACY WITH HIM THE MORE I
INTIMACY WITH HIM THE MORE I WORK WITH HIM PERSONALLY AND
WORK WITH HIM PERSONALLY AND INCLINE TO SURRENDER TO HIM,
INCLINE TO SURRENDER TO HIM, SURRENDER TO ME MEANS I AM
SURRENDER TO ME MEANS I AM SEEING MY LIMITATIONS AND
SEEING MY LIMITATIONS AND HONEST TO GOD BELIEVING HE HAS
HONEST TO GOD BELIEVING HE HAS MY BEST INTEREST AT HEART AND
MY BEST INTEREST AT HEART AND CAN I BELIEVE HIM.
CAN I BELIEVE HIM. >> AT MY POINT OF SURRENDER I
>> AT MY POINT OF SURRENDER I HAD ENOUGH.
HAD ENOUGH. I CAN REMEMBER SITTING UP WITH
I CAN REMEMBER SITTING UP WITH FRIENDS I GOT HIGH WITH AND
FRIENDS I GOT HIGH WITH AND THEY WOULD TAKE A HIT AND TALK
THEY WOULD TAKE A HIT AND TALK ABOUT HOW DISGUSTED WE WERE
ABOUT HOW DISGUSTED WE WERE THAT WE COULDN'T STOP, SO THAT
THAT WE COULDN'T STOP, SO THAT WASN'T THE ISSUE.
WASN'T THE ISSUE. I WAS READY TO QUIT.
I WAS READY TO QUIT. I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO.
I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO. AND I GUESS MY FIRST ACT OF
AND I GUESS MY FIRST ACT OF SURRENDER WAS TO GO INTO
SURRENDER WAS TO GO INTO TREATMENT NOT KNOWING ALL THAT
TREATMENT NOT KNOWING ALL THAT IT WAS GOING TO ENTAIL AND
IT WAS GOING TO ENTAIL AND INVOLVE.
INVOLVE. ONCE I GOT THERE, I'M HERE TO
ONCE I GOT THERE, I'M HERE TO GIVE UP CRACK COCAINE AND
GIVE UP CRACK COCAINE AND PROMISCUITY AND ALCOHOL.
PROMISCUITY AND ALCOHOL. THEY SAID, NO, YOU NEED TO
THEY SAID, NO, YOU NEED TO STOP LYING.
STOP LYING. [LAUGHING]
[LAUGHING] YOU KNOW, WHAT DOES THAT HAVE
YOU KNOW, WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO?
TO DO? >> WHAT'S THAT ABOUT?
>> WHAT'S THAT ABOUT? >> YEAH, WHAT'S THAT ABOUT?
>> YEAH, WHAT'S THAT ABOUT? YOU'RE A MANIPULATOR.
YOU'RE A MANIPULATOR. THAT'S THE FIRST TIME I HEARD
THAT'S THE FIRST TIME I HEARD THAT AND CONFRONTED ON THAT
THAT AND CONFRONTED ON THAT LEVEL.
LEVEL. I DIDN'T THINK I WOULD HAVE TO
I DIDN'T THINK I WOULD HAVE TO SURRENDER THOSE THINGS BECAUSE
SURRENDER THOSE THINGS BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I USED TO FUNCTION
THAT'S WHAT I USED TO FUNCTION AND LIVE.
AND LIVE. I MANIPULATED THE SITUATION
I MANIPULATED THE SITUATION AND YOU WERE SUPPOSE TO LIKE
AND YOU WERE SUPPOSE TO LIKE ME AND I WOULD LIKE YOU AND
ME AND I WOULD LIKE YOU AND EVERYTHING WOULD BE OKAY.
EVERYTHING WOULD BE OKAY. I THANK GOD IT WAS A CHRISTIAN
I THANK GOD IT WAS A CHRISTIAN TREATMENT FACILITY, BECAUSE OF
TREATMENT FACILITY, BECAUSE OF THE BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES THEY
THE BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES THEY TAUGHT ME, THAT TOOK
TAUGHT ME, THAT TOOK PRECEDENCE OVER ANYTHING ELSE.
PRECEDENCE OVER ANYTHING ELSE. AND THAT TOOK ME FOR A LOOP.
AND THAT TOOK ME FOR A LOOP. >> THIS OLD MAN CRIED OUT TO
>> THIS OLD MAN CRIED OUT TO THE LORD, AND THE LORD HEARD
THE LORD, AND THE LORD HEARD MY CRY AND DELIVERED ME OUT OF
MY CRY AND DELIVERED ME OUT OF ALL MY TROUBLES.
ALL MY TROUBLES. PSALMS 34:6.
PSALMS 34:6. I STARTED DRINKING BECAUSE I
I STARTED DRINKING BECAUSE I FELT, FIRST OF ALL, I SEEN MY
FELT, FIRST OF ALL, I SEEN MY MOTHER DRINKING.
MOTHER DRINKING. AND I SEEN IT WAS AN ESCAPE
AND I SEEN IT WAS AN ESCAPE FOR HER FROM REALITY.
FOR HER FROM REALITY. I DEALT DRUGS FROM SEVENTH
I DEALT DRUGS FROM SEVENTH GRADE TO 12TH GRADE MARIJUANA,
GRADE TO 12TH GRADE MARIJUANA, NEVER WAS BUSTED.
NEVER WAS BUSTED. IT STARTED WITH MY COUSIN
IT STARTED WITH MY COUSIN TELLING ME, SHOWED ME WHERE HE
TELLING ME, SHOWED ME WHERE HE KEPT HIS STASH, EVERY MORNING
KEPT HIS STASH, EVERY MORNING BEFORE SCHOOL I WOULD ROLL UP
BEFORE SCHOOL I WOULD ROLL UP 100 JOINTS OR 50 AND TAKE THEM
100 JOINTS OR 50 AND TAKE THEM TO SCHOOL AND SELL THEM.
TO SCHOOL AND SELL THEM. MADE ON THE AVERAGE OF $100 A
MADE ON THE AVERAGE OF $100 A DAY AND WHEN YOU'RE IN HIGH
DAY AND WHEN YOU'RE IN HIGH SCHOOL OR JUNIOR HIGH, THAT'S
SCHOOL OR JUNIOR HIGH, THAT'S GOOD MONEY FOR A 15, 16 OLD.
GOOD MONEY FOR A 15, 16 OLD. I PROGRESSED TO COCAINE.
I PROGRESSED TO COCAINE. FIRST I WAS SNORTING.
FIRST I WAS SNORTING. JUST SNORTING.
JUST SNORTING. AND I WOULD SNORT WITH FRIENDS
AND I WOULD SNORT WITH FRIENDS AFTER WORK AND STUFF LIKE
AFTER WORK AND STUFF LIKE THAT.
THAT. NEXT THING YOU KNOW I STARTED
NEXT THING YOU KNOW I STARTED MISSING WORK, COMING IN LATE,
MISSING WORK, COMING IN LATE, TAKING OFF, MISSING
TAKING OFF, MISSING APPOINTMENTS ALL BECAUSE OF
APPOINTMENTS ALL BECAUSE OF THE COCAINE.
THE COCAINE. I FELT IN MY LIFE THAT I WAS
I FELT IN MY LIFE THAT I WAS LOSING MY MIND.
LOSING MY MIND. I FELT ONE DAY LIKE I WAS OUT
I FELT ONE DAY LIKE I WAS OUT OF CONTROL WHEN I HAD JUST A
OF CONTROL WHEN I HAD JUST A MESSED UP WAY OF THINKING AND
MESSED UP WAY OF THINKING AND I WAS THINKING ABOUT SUICIDE.
I WAS THINKING ABOUT SUICIDE. I THOUGHT ABOUT SUICIDE A FEW
I THOUGHT ABOUT SUICIDE A FEW TIMES.
TIMES. ONE DAY I WAS SITTING HERE
ONE DAY I WAS SITTING HERE DRINKING AND I REALIZED I
DRINKING AND I REALIZED I COULDN'T FIX MY PROBLEMS
COULDN'T FIX MY PROBLEMS MYSELF.
MYSELF. I REALIZED I HAD A PROBLEM.
I REALIZED I HAD A PROBLEM. EVERYDAY I WAS EXTENDING
EVERYDAY I WAS EXTENDING MONEY ON ALCOHOL AND DRUGS AND
MONEY ON ALCOHOL AND DRUGS AND CRIME, ABOUT TO GET EVICTED
CRIME, ABOUT TO GET EVICTED FROM MY APARTMENT.
FROM MY APARTMENT. DIDN'T HAVE A DIME.
DIDN'T HAVE A DIME. I REALIZED THAT, I CAN'T KEEP
I REALIZED THAT, I CAN'T KEEP LIVING LIKE THIS.
LIVING LIKE THIS. I CAN'T KEEP LIVING FROM
I CAN'T KEEP LIVING FROM PAYCHECK TO PAYCHECK.
PAYCHECK TO PAYCHECK. I CAN'T KEEP GOING TO WORK,
I CAN'T KEEP GOING TO WORK, JUST LIVING LIKE THIS,
JUST LIVING LIKE THIS, SPENDING MY MONEY ON DRUGS AND
SPENDING MY MONEY ON DRUGS AND ALCOHOL.
ALCOHOL. I WAS A FUNCTIONAL ADDICT.
I WAS A FUNCTIONAL ADDICT. AND I HAD TO CHANGE.
AND I HAD TO CHANGE. I HAD TO CHANGE OR I WAS GOING
I HAD TO CHANGE OR I WAS GOING TO BE DESTROYED.
TO BE DESTROYED. I WAS GOING TO BE JUST LIKE
I WAS GOING TO BE JUST LIKE THAT MAN LYING IN THE GUTTER
THAT MAN LYING IN THE GUTTER WAKING UP EVERY DAY JUST TO
WAKING UP EVERY DAY JUST TO GET A BOTTLE TO DRINK HIS LIFE
GET A BOTTLE TO DRINK HIS LIFE AWAY.
AWAY. WELL I FINALLY MADE IT TO THE
WELL I FINALLY MADE IT TO THE DOOR STEPS OF TEEN CHALLENGE
DOOR STEPS OF TEEN CHALLENGE IN 1986.
IN 1986. REVEREND WAS WAITING THERE FOR
REVEREND WAS WAITING THERE FOR ME AND TOLD ME UP FRONT, YOU
ME AND TOLD ME UP FRONT, YOU HAVE TO GIVE UP YOUR DRUGS AND
HAVE TO GIVE UP YOUR DRUGS AND ALCOHOL.
ALCOHOL. >> HE WAS A VERY ANGRY PERSON
>> HE WAS A VERY ANGRY PERSON WITH BEING HERE.
WITH BEING HERE. HE HAD AN AGENDA OF COMING TO
HE HAD AN AGENDA OF COMING TO THE PROGRAM FOR A COUPLE WEEKS
THE PROGRAM FOR A COUPLE WEEKS TO SATISFY PAROLE.
TO SATISFY PAROLE. HE DID WHAT HE THOUGHT HE
HE DID WHAT HE THOUGHT HE SHOULD DO UNTIL HE HAD AN
SHOULD DO UNTIL HE HAD AN ENCOUNTER WITH JESUS CHRIST.
ENCOUNTER WITH JESUS CHRIST. >> I THINK WHEN I HEARD THE
>> I THINK WHEN I HEARD THE LORD JUST THROUGH PEOPLE
LORD JUST THROUGH PEOPLE TELLING ME, SHARING THE GOSPEL
TELLING ME, SHARING THE GOSPEL THAT JESUS LOVES ME.
THAT JESUS LOVES ME. JESUS CARES ABOUT YOU.
JESUS CARES ABOUT YOU. JESUS WILL GIVE YOU HAPPINESS
JESUS WILL GIVE YOU HAPPINESS AND JOY.
AND JOY. JESUS WILL MAKE A WAY OUT OF
JESUS WILL MAKE A WAY OUT OF NO WAY.
NO WAY. JESUS WILL FIX YOUR SITUATION.
JESUS WILL FIX YOUR SITUATION. I KNOW A PERSON WHO CAN CHANGE
I KNOW A PERSON WHO CAN CHANGE YOUR WHOLE LIFE.
YOUR WHOLE LIFE. PEOPLE WOULD TELL ME THAT.
PEOPLE WOULD TELL ME THAT. AND JUST FINALLY ONE DAY IT
AND JUST FINALLY ONE DAY IT SUNK IN.
SUNK IN. HE HELPED ME.
HE HELPED ME. I TRIED TO STOP AND GET HELP
I TRIED TO STOP AND GET HELP AND GO THROUGH COUNSELING,
AND GO THROUGH COUNSELING, SECULAR COUNSELING, HUMANISM,
SECULAR COUNSELING, HUMANISM, BEEN IN PROGRAMS THAT DIDN'T
BEEN IN PROGRAMS THAT DIDN'T WORK, PEOPLE WOULD TALK TO ME
WORK, PEOPLE WOULD TALK TO ME AND IT DIDN'T WORK.
AND IT DIDN'T WORK. BUT GOD BROKE THAT CURSE.
BUT GOD BROKE THAT CURSE. >> THE ANGER THAT WAS THERE
>> THE ANGER THAT WAS THERE BEFORE, BEFORE IT WOULD END UP
BEFORE, BEFORE IT WOULD END UP IN FISTS AND CLUBS AND CHAINS
IN FISTS AND CLUBS AND CHAINS AND BLOOD, NOW IS DEALT WITH
AND BLOOD, NOW IS DEALT WITH IN LOVE.
IN LOVE. >> HE SAID BY THE TIME YOU
>> HE SAID BY THE TIME YOU COME BACK IN HERE, HE SAID IF
COME BACK IN HERE, HE SAID IF YOU COME IN HERE GOD IS GOING
YOU COME IN HERE GOD IS GOING TO HEAL YOU, DELIVER YOU,
TO HEAL YOU, DELIVER YOU, YOU'RE GOING TO GET SET FREE.
YOU'RE GOING TO GET SET FREE. I CAME IN THAT DAY AND
I CAME IN THAT DAY AND ACCEPTED THE LORD JESUS CHRIST
ACCEPTED THE LORD JESUS CHRIST INTO MY LIFE, AND MY LIFE
INTO MY LIFE, AND MY LIFE HASN'T BEEN THE SAME SINCE.
HASN'T BEEN THE SAME SINCE. GOD TOLD ME THROUGH A BROTHER,
GOD TOLD ME THROUGH A BROTHER, IF YOU STAY IN THE LORD, GOD
IF YOU STAY IN THE LORD, GOD SAID HE'LL TAKE YOU PLACES
SAID HE'LL TAKE YOU PLACES YOU'VE NEVER BEEN BEFORE AND
YOU'VE NEVER BEEN BEFORE AND YOU'LL SEE THINGS YOU'VE NEVER
YOU'LL SEE THINGS YOU'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE.
SEEN BEFORE. AND GOD DID IT FOR ME.
AND GOD DID IT FOR ME. GOD BROUGHT ME FROM THE JAIL
GOD BROUGHT ME FROM THE JAIL HOUSE, THE CRACK HOUSE, DOWN
HOUSE, THE CRACK HOUSE, DOWN TO THE CHURCH HOUSE.
TO THE CHURCH HOUSE. ONLY GOD CAN DO THAT.
ONLY GOD CAN DO THAT. ONLY GOD CAN TAKE A SOUL AS
ONLY GOD CAN TAKE A SOUL AS SICK AS MIND.
SICK AS MIND. >> GOD WANTS TO MAKE YOU OVER
>> GOD WANTS TO MAKE YOU OVER AGAIN.
AGAIN. HE WANTS TO MAKE YOU A NEW
HE WANTS TO MAKE YOU A NEW PERSON.
PERSON. THOEPTS MAKE YOU INTO A NEW
THOEPTS MAKE YOU INTO A NEW PERSON.
PERSON. AND HE WANTS TO MAKE YOU
AND HE WANTS TO MAKE YOU BEAUTIFUL.
BEAUTIFUL. HE WANTS TO TAKE OUT ALL THE
HE WANTS TO TAKE OUT ALL THE EVIL AND PAIN AND SORROW AND
EVIL AND PAIN AND SORROW AND DOWNTRODDEN AND ALL THE TALK
DOWNTRODDEN AND ALL THE TALK ABOUT AND ALL THE ABUSE YOU'VE
ABOUT AND ALL THE ABUSE YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH.
BEEN THROUGH. YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN ABUSED
YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN ABUSED MENTALLY PHYSICALLY OR
MENTALLY PHYSICALLY OR SEXUALLY BUT GOD CAN FIX IT.
SEXUALLY BUT GOD CAN FIX IT. HE DID IT FOR ME, AND HE'LL DO
HE DID IT FOR ME, AND HE'LL DO IT FOR YOU, IN JESUS' NAME,
IT FOR YOU, IN JESUS' NAME, AMEN.
AMEN. >> HAVE YOU TRIED TO RUN YOUR
>> HAVE YOU TRIED TO RUN YOUR LIFE AND IT DIDN'T WORK?
LIFE AND IT DIDN'T WORK? HAVE YOU HIT A WALL?
HAVE YOU HIT A WALL? HAVE YOU HIT THE BOTTOM?
HAVE YOU HIT THE BOTTOM? HAVE YOU DONE ALL YOU KNOW TO
HAVE YOU DONE ALL YOU KNOW TO DO AND IT'S NOT WORKING?
DO AND IT'S NOT WORKING? WHY NOT CONSIDER SURRENDERING
WHY NOT CONSIDER SURRENDERING YOUR WILL AND LIFE TO THE CARE
YOUR WILL AND LIFE TO THE CARE OF GOD.
OF GOD. YOU SAY YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
YOU SAY YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. MY LIFE IS SO OUT OF CONTROL.
MY LIFE IS SO OUT OF CONTROL. THINGS ARE SO MESSED UP.
THINGS ARE SO MESSED UP. I DON'T KNOW IF GOD CAN FIX
I DON'T KNOW IF GOD CAN FIX IT.
IT. THINK ABOUT THAT JUST A
THINK ABOUT THAT JUST A MOMENT.
MOMENT. THE ONE THAT CREATED THE
THE ONE THAT CREATED THE HEAVENS AND THE EARTH.
HEAVENS AND THE EARTH. THE ONE THAT CREATED ALL THE
THE ONE THAT CREATED ALL THE GALAXIES AND CREATED EVERY
GALAXIES AND CREATED EVERY LIVING THING AND CREATED US,
LIVING THING AND CREATED US, DON'T YOU THINK HE CAN RUN THE
DON'T YOU THINK HE CAN RUN THE UNIVERSE?
UNIVERSE? WE'RE ON EARTH, NOTHING IS
WE'RE ON EARTH, NOTHING IS HOLDING US UP, WE'RE FLYING
HOLDING US UP, WE'RE FLYING THROUGH THE UNIVERSE, WE
THROUGH THE UNIVERSE, WE CIRCLE THE SUN.
CIRCLE THE SUN. THINK ABOUT THIS.
THINK ABOUT THIS. IT TAKES 365 DAYS TO GET
IT TAKES 365 DAYS TO GET AROUND THE SUN.
AROUND THE SUN. THAT'S HOW SMALL WE ARE AND
THAT'S HOW SMALL WE ARE AND THAT'S HOW BIG THE SUN IS.
THAT'S HOW BIG THE SUN IS. WHILE WE'RE FLYING AROUND THE
WHILE WE'RE FLYING AROUND THE SUN WE MAKE A COMPLETE CIRCLE
SUN WE MAKE A COMPLETE CIRCLE EVERY 24 HOURS.
EVERY 24 HOURS. SCIENTISTS TELL US THE EARTH
SCIENTISTS TELL US THE EARTH IS 22 THOUSAND SOMETHING MILES
IS 22 THOUSAND SOMETHING MILES AROUND AND SHOULD WE MOVE A
AROUND AND SHOULD WE MOVE A FEW DEGREES IN ANY DIRECTION
FEW DEGREES IN ANY DIRECTION WE'LL BURN UP OR FREEZE TO
WE'LL BURN UP OR FREEZE TO DEATH AND THERE'S SIX BILLION
DEATH AND THERE'S SIX BILLION PEOPLE ON THIS LITTLE BALL.
PEOPLE ON THIS LITTLE BALL. IF HE CAN KEEP THE UNIVERSE IN
IF HE CAN KEEP THE UNIVERSE IN ORDER, DON'T YOU THINK HE CAN
ORDER, DON'T YOU THINK HE CAN FIX OUR LIFE?
FIX OUR LIFE? THE CHOICE IS OURS.
THE CHOICE IS OURS. IF WE MAKE THE DECISION TO
IF WE MAKE THE DECISION TO SURRENDER OUR WILL AND LIFE TO
SURRENDER OUR WILL AND LIFE TO THE CARE OF GOD, THEN HE
THE CARE OF GOD, THEN HE BECOMES THE EMPLOYER AND WE
BECOMES THE EMPLOYER AND WE BECOME THE EMPLOYEE.
BECOME THE EMPLOYEE. THE ONLY THING WE HAVE TO DO
THE ONLY THING WE HAVE TO DO IS STAY CLOSE TO HIM AND DO
IS STAY CLOSE TO HIM AND DO HIS WORK WELL, AND HE PROMISED
HIS WORK WELL, AND HE PROMISED US THAT EVERYTHING WE NEED IN
US THAT EVERYTHING WE NEED IN THIS LIFE AND THE LIFE TO COME
THIS LIFE AND THE LIFE TO COME IS TAKEN CARE OF.
IS TAKEN CARE OF. BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT?
BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT? IT COMES TO MAKING A DECISION.
IT COMES TO MAKING A DECISION. YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN
YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN DO THAT.
DO THAT. NO ONE CAN MAKE ME SERVE GOD.
NO ONE CAN MAKE ME SERVE GOD. I DON'T HAVE TO SERVE GOD.
I DON'T HAVE TO SERVE GOD. ANYTHING I WANT TO DO, GOD
ANYTHING I WANT TO DO, GOD DESIGNED IT THAT WAY.
DESIGNED IT THAT WAY. I DID WHAT I WANTED TO DO FOR
I DID WHAT I WANTED TO DO FOR A LONG TIME.
A LONG TIME. MY SELFISHNESS AND
MY SELFISHNESS AND SELF-SEEKING AND ME RUNNING MY
SELF-SEEKING AND ME RUNNING MY LIFE AND GET THINGS AND DO THE
LIFE AND GET THINGS AND DO THE THINGS I WANTED TO DO BROUGHT
THINGS I WANTED TO DO BROUGHT ME TO A POINT, A POINT OF
ME TO A POINT, A POINT OF DEATH.
DEATH. I WAS HOOKED, BOUND AND I
I WAS HOOKED, BOUND AND I COULD NOT MANAGE MY LIFE.
COULD NOT MANAGE MY LIFE. BUT WHEN I SURRENDERED MY WILL
BUT WHEN I SURRENDERED MY WILL AND MY LIFE TO HIS CARE, NOT
AND MY LIFE TO HIS CARE, NOT INSTANTLY, BUT ALL OF A
INSTANTLY, BUT ALL OF A SUDDEN THINGS BEGAN TO CHANGE.
SUDDEN THINGS BEGAN TO CHANGE. I KNOW I WAS INSTANTLY
I KNOW I WAS INSTANTLY FORGIVEN, BUT IT'S A PROCESS.
FORGIVEN, BUT IT'S A PROCESS. OLD HABITS ARE HARD TO BREAK,
OLD HABITS ARE HARD TO BREAK, BUT IF YOU TURN IT OVER TO GOD
BUT IF YOU TURN IT OVER TO GOD AND LET HIM RUN THINGS, IF HE
AND LET HIM RUN THINGS, IF HE CAN RUN THE UNIVERSE, DON'T
CAN RUN THE UNIVERSE, DON'T YOU THINK HE CAN RUN YOUR
YOU THINK HE CAN RUN YOUR LITTLE LIFE AND MINE?
LITTLE LIFE AND MINE? HE CAN FIX IF WE LET HIM, HE
HE CAN FIX IF WE LET HIM, HE HAS THE POWER TO DO IT.
HAS THE POWER TO DO IT. MAKE THE DECISION TODAY TO
MAKE THE DECISION TODAY TO SURRENDER TO GOD AND LET HIM
SURRENDER TO GOD AND LET HIM TAKE OVER.
TAKE OVER. IT WORKS, IT REALLY DOES.
IT WORKS, IT REALLY DOES. >> TINY, WHAT ABOUT THE
>> TINY, WHAT ABOUT THE ISSUES OF PRIDE AND
ISSUES OF PRIDE AND SELF-CENTEREDNESS IN YOUR
SELF-CENTEREDNESS IN YOUR SURRENDER PROCESS?
SURRENDER PROCESS? >> WELL, I'M REMINDED OF
>> WELL, I'M REMINDED OF FRANK SINATRA, WHEN YOU THINK
FRANK SINATRA, WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT FRANK SINATRA YOU THINK
ABOUT FRANK SINATRA YOU THINK OF THE SONG, I DID IT MY WAY.
OF THE SONG, I DID IT MY WAY. SO EVERYTHING I DID, I WANTED
SO EVERYTHING I DID, I WANTED TO DO IT MY WAY.
TO DO IT MY WAY. I DIDN'T WANT TO LISTEN TO NO
I DIDN'T WANT TO LISTEN TO NO ONE'S DIRECTIONS BECAUSE I
ONE'S DIRECTIONS BECAUSE I THOUGHT I WAS IN CHARGE.
THOUGHT I WAS IN CHARGE. WHEN SOMEONE GAVE ME A
WHEN SOMEONE GAVE ME A SUGGESTION I WOULD TAKE IT AND
SUGGESTION I WOULD TAKE IT AND SAY WE DON'T WANT TO USE THAT.
SAY WE DON'T WANT TO USE THAT. WE'LL DO IT MY WAY.
WE'LL DO IT MY WAY. I WOULD DO IT THE SAME WAY
I WOULD DO IT THE SAME WAY THEY SUGGESTED IT.
THEY SUGGESTED IT. IT WAS A GREAT IDEA, BUT I
IT WAS A GREAT IDEA, BUT I DIDN'T WANT THEM TO MAKE THE
DIDN'T WANT THEM TO MAKE THE SUGGESTION.
SUGGESTION. THEY MIGHT HAVE MADE A GOOD
THEY MIGHT HAVE MADE A GOOD SUGGESTION AND I USED IT.
SUGGESTION AND I USED IT. I'M JUST REMINDED OF THE
I'M JUST REMINDED OF THE SCRIPTURE, PSALM 34:6 THIS MAN
SCRIPTURE, PSALM 34:6 THIS MAN CRIED TO THE LORD AND THE LORD
CRIED TO THE LORD AND THE LORD HEARD HIS CRY AND DELIVERED
HEARD HIS CRY AND DELIVERED HIM OUT OF ALL HIS TROUBLE.
HIM OUT OF ALL HIS TROUBLE. WHEN I CRIED OUT TO GOD, HE
WHEN I CRIED OUT TO GOD, HE DELIVERED ME FROM ME.
DELIVERED ME FROM ME. HE DELIVERED ME AND GAVE ME A
HE DELIVERED ME AND GAVE ME A HEART OF SURRENDER TO HIM, NOT
HEART OF SURRENDER TO HIM, NOT LET MY WILL BE DONE BUT HIS
LET MY WILL BE DONE BUT HIS WILL BE DONE.
WILL BE DONE. I WAS GOING ON MY OWN STRENGTH
I WAS GOING ON MY OWN STRENGTH FOR A LONG TIME.
FOR A LONG TIME. >> WHEN YOU'RE PROUD, THIS
>> WHEN YOU'RE PROUD, THIS GOES INTO THE WHOLE CONTROL
GOES INTO THE WHOLE CONTROL THING, YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO
THING, YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LOSE BY LETTING GO OF ANYTHING
LOSE BY LETTING GO OF ANYTHING THAT YOU HAVE TO MAINTAIN ALL
THAT YOU HAVE TO MAINTAIN ALL OF THESE THINGS THAT YOU GOT
OF THESE THINGS THAT YOU GOT GOING ON THAT GIVE YOU THE
GOING ON THAT GIVE YOU THE CONTROL THAT YOU NEED.
CONTROL THAT YOU NEED. WHEN YOU DO SURRENDER, THE
WHEN YOU DO SURRENDER, THE BEAUTY OF IT TO ME IS THAT THE
BEAUTY OF IT TO ME IS THAT THE FEAR IS GONE.
FEAR IS GONE. YOU'VE GIVEN AWAY THE HOLD
YOU'VE GIVEN AWAY THE HOLD THAT IT HAS ON YOUR LIFE.
THAT IT HAS ON YOUR LIFE. SO SUDDENLY YOU'RE FREE THEN
SO SUDDENLY YOU'RE FREE THEN TO BE WHO YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO BE
TO BE WHO YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO BE AND TO EMBRACE WHO YOU'RE
AND TO EMBRACE WHO YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO BE.
SUPPOSE TO BE. THAT WAS A BIG THING FOR ME.
THAT WAS A BIG THING FOR ME. EMBRACING WHO I AM.
EMBRACING WHO I AM. DOESN'T MATTER WHAT ANYONE
DOESN'T MATTER WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS.
ELSE THINKS. I CAN GO OUT OF THE HOUSE
I CAN GO OUT OF THE HOUSE WITHOUT MAKE UP.
WITHOUT MAKE UP. OH, WELL IT'S NOT THE END OF
OH, WELL IT'S NOT THE END OF THE WORLD.
THE WORLD. WHY DO I CARE WHAT THEY THINK?
WHY DO I CARE WHAT THEY THINK? BECAUSE THEY'RE JUST AS FLAWED
BECAUSE THEY'RE JUST AS FLAWED AS I AM.
AS I AM. I DON'T KNOW.
I DON'T KNOW. I COULD GO FOR HOURS ON THAT
I COULD GO FOR HOURS ON THAT SUBJECT.
SUBJECT. BUT WE GET SO ENTRAPPED IN
BUT WE GET SO ENTRAPPED IN THESE THINGS, I CAN'T LET GO
THESE THINGS, I CAN'T LET GO OF THIS, BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT
OF THIS, BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT MAKES ME FEEL SECURE.
MAKES ME FEEL SECURE. AND YET THAT PLACE OF
AND YET THAT PLACE OF SURRENDER, I'VE KNOWN WAY MORE
SURRENDER, I'VE KNOWN WAY MORE SECURITY IN THAT PLACE THAN
SECURITY IN THAT PLACE THAN I'VE EVER KNOWN IN TRYING TO
I'VE EVER KNOWN IN TRYING TO CONTROL ALL THE OTHER THINGS.
CONTROL ALL THE OTHER THINGS. NOW I HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE.
NOW I HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE. I'M WILLING.
I'M WILLING. >> AND YOU HAVE EVERYTHING TO
>> AND YOU HAVE EVERYTHING TO GAIN.
GAIN. >> YEAH.
>> YEAH. >> TALK ABOUT SURRENDER, I
>> TALK ABOUT SURRENDER, I HAD A BIG ISSUE WITH
HAD A BIG ISSUE WITH AUTHORITY.
AUTHORITY. IF YOU PUT IN A POSITION WHERE
IF YOU PUT IN A POSITION WHERE EVERYBODY UNDER ME DIDN'T
EVERYBODY UNDER ME DIDN'T LISTEN AND EVERYBODY ABOVE ME
LISTEN AND EVERYBODY ABOVE ME DIDN'T KNOW WHAT THEY WERE
DIDN'T KNOW WHAT THEY WERE DOING.
DOING. I DIDN'T KNOW IF I WANTED TO
I DIDN'T KNOW IF I WANTED TO BE IN CONTROL OR FOLLOW.
BE IN CONTROL OR FOLLOW. I HAD AN ISSUE WITH AUTHORITY.
I HAD AN ISSUE WITH AUTHORITY. SURRENDER TO ME CAME FROM
SURRENDER TO ME CAME FROM LEARNING WHO GOD WAS IN MY
LEARNING WHO GOD WAS IN MY LIFE.
LIFE. MY FATHER WASN'T IN THE HOME.
MY FATHER WASN'T IN THE HOME. I DIDN'T HAVE THAT ROLE MODEL.
I DIDN'T HAVE THAT ROLE MODEL. IT'S SUCH AN IMPORTANT FACTOR
IT'S SUCH AN IMPORTANT FACTOR IN ANY CHILD'S LIFE, AND HE
IN ANY CHILD'S LIFE, AND HE WASN'T THERE.
WASN'T THERE. AND I LOVE MY FATHER.
AND I LOVE MY FATHER. HE'S PASSED ON.
HE'S PASSED ON. BUT HE WASN'T THERE TO GIVE ME
BUT HE WASN'T THERE TO GIVE ME THAT EXAMPLE, THAT AUTHORITY
THAT EXAMPLE, THAT AUTHORITY FIGURE IN MY LIFE, SO WHEN YOU
FIGURE IN MY LIFE, SO WHEN YOU SAY GOD IS MY FATHER AND HE
SAY GOD IS MY FATHER AND HE WAS GOING TO TAKE CARE OF
WAS GOING TO TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING, I DIDN'T HAVE
EVERYTHING, I DIDN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO COMPARE THAT TO.
ANYTHING TO COMPARE THAT TO. I HAD NO IDEA.
I HAD NO IDEA. BUT MY PASTOR TOLD ME, HE
BUT MY PASTOR TOLD ME, HE SAID, THERE'S SAFETY IN
SAID, THERE'S SAFETY IN OBEDIENCE.
OBEDIENCE. AND THAT OPENED UP, WHEN YOU
AND THAT OPENED UP, WHEN YOU WERE TALKING, CONSTANCE,
WERE TALKING, CONSTANCE, THAT'S WHAT I WAS THINKING
THAT'S WHAT I WAS THINKING ABOUT.
ABOUT. THERE'S SAFETY IN OBEDIENCE.
THERE'S SAFETY IN OBEDIENCE. HE'S RESPONSIBLE FOR ME.
HE'S RESPONSIBLE FOR ME. IF I'M LIVING ACCORDING TO HIS
IF I'M LIVING ACCORDING TO HIS WILL HE'S PREPARED TO TAKE
WILL HE'S PREPARED TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR ME.
RESPONSIBILITY FOR ME. IF I'M IN LINE WITH HIS WILL,
IF I'M IN LINE WITH HIS WILL, THAT'S WHERE SURRENDER CAME
THAT'S WHERE SURRENDER CAME FOR ME.
FOR ME. >> WELL IN THAT TERM
>> WELL IN THAT TERM EVERYTHING, YOU BROUGHT UP
EVERYTHING, YOU BROUGHT UP SOMETHING SO IMPORTANT FOR ME.
SOMETHING SO IMPORTANT FOR ME. THE BEHAVIOR I FOUND IT SUCH
THE BEHAVIOR I FOUND IT SUCH EASIER TO SURRENDER THAN THE
EASIER TO SURRENDER THAN THE CHARACTER ISSUES THAN THE
CHARACTER ISSUES THAN THE CRACK OR BOOZE OR SEX
CRACK OR BOOZE OR SEX WHATEVER, THAT'S TOUGH BUT I
WHATEVER, THAT'S TOUGH BUT I THINK IT'S SIMPLER TO DEAL
THINK IT'S SIMPLER TO DEAL WITH THAT THAN THE ISSUES OF
WITH THAT THAN THE ISSUES OF THE HEART.
THE HEART. >> LIKE THE OLD SAYING IF YOU
>> LIKE THE OLD SAYING IF YOU GET KNOCKED DOWN FLAT ON YOUR
GET KNOCKED DOWN FLAT ON YOUR BACK YOU GOT TO LOOK UP.
BACK YOU GOT TO LOOK UP. I HAD USE GOD IN THE PAST TO
I HAD USE GOD IN THE PAST TO HELP ME ALONG IN THE WEAK
HELP ME ALONG IN THE WEAK SPOTS.
SPOTS. AS SOON AS I WAS BACK ON MY
AS SOON AS I WAS BACK ON MY FEET I SAID, THANK YOU, AND
FEET I SAID, THANK YOU, AND THEN GO ON ABOUT IT.
THEN GO ON ABOUT IT. BUT I CAN TELL YOU WHAT REALLY
BUT I CAN TELL YOU WHAT REALLY HELPED ME, UNDERSTANDING THAT
HELPED ME, UNDERSTANDING THAT GOD WOULD TAKE CARE OF ME.
GOD WOULD TAKE CARE OF ME. WHEN I WENT INTO THE MINISTRY,
WHEN I WENT INTO THE MINISTRY, I'LL NOT BE A GOODY TWO SHOES
I'LL NOT BE A GOODY TWO SHOES PREACHER.
PREACHER. I'LL TELL IT LIKE IT IS, THE
I'LL TELL IT LIKE IT IS, THE REAL WORLD.
REAL WORLD. AND I SAID GOD'S GOING TO TAKE
AND I SAID GOD'S GOING TO TAKE CARE OF ME, AND HE HAS.
CARE OF ME, AND HE HAS. I'M NOT EVEN SURPRISED
I'M NOT EVEN SURPRISED ANYMORE.
ANYMORE. FIRST YEAR I WAS SURPRISED.
FIRST YEAR I WAS SURPRISED. I DIDN'T HAVE A CAR.
I DIDN'T HAVE A CAR. PEOPLE CALL ME ON THE PHONE.
PEOPLE CALL ME ON THE PHONE. I'M BUYING A NEW CAR, DO YOU
I'M BUYING A NEW CAR, DO YOU WANT MY OLD ONE?
WANT MY OLD ONE? I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY.
I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY. NO, I'M GOING TO GIVE IT TO
NO, I'M GOING TO GIVE IT TO YOU.
YOU. MY WIFE LEARNED NOT TO WORRY.
MY WIFE LEARNED NOT TO WORRY. I DON'T WORRY.
I DON'T WORRY. YOU KNOW.
YOU KNOW. GOD LITERALLY, I BELIEVE AND
GOD LITERALLY, I BELIEVE AND HAVE GREAT FAITH HE WILL TAKE
HAVE GREAT FAITH HE WILL TAKE CARE OF ME.
CARE OF ME. >> A FRIEND OF MINE, FRIEND
>> A FRIEND OF MINE, FRIEND JOE WAS IN THE EXACT SAME
JOE WAS IN THE EXACT SAME CONDITION.
CONDITION. HE WAS MY DRUG DEALER FOR A
HE WAS MY DRUG DEALER FOR A GOOD PORTION OF THE TIME.
GOOD PORTION OF THE TIME. HE USED TO SUPPLY ME WITH
HE USED TO SUPPLY ME WITH HEROIN.
HEROIN. IF I REMEMBER RIGHT, WE WERE
IF I REMEMBER RIGHT, WE WERE HANGING OUT WITH A LOT OF
HANGING OUT WITH A LOT OF PEOPLE IN THIS SMALL PARK IN
PEOPLE IN THIS SMALL PARK IN LOWER MANHATTAN, AND HE COMES
LOWER MANHATTAN, AND HE COMES RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE GROUP AND SOMETHING IS
GROUP AND SOMETHING IS DIFFERENT ABOUT HIM.
DIFFERENT ABOUT HIM. HE LOOKED DIFFERENT.
HE LOOKED DIFFERENT. AND HE STARTED TALKING TO ME
AND HE STARTED TALKING TO ME ABOUT NO LONGER USING
ABOUT NO LONGER USING METHADONE THAT HE'S CLEAN.
METHADONE THAT HE'S CLEAN. AND SO PEOPLE STARTED TO SAY,
AND SO PEOPLE STARTED TO SAY, HOW DID YOU GET CLEAN?
HOW DID YOU GET CLEAN? JESUS CHRIST.
JESUS CHRIST. I FOUND MYSELF GO FROM THE
I FOUND MYSELF GO FROM THE PLACE INSIDE OF ME MOCKING
PLACE INSIDE OF ME MOCKING HIM, TO WANTING TO LISTEN TO
HIM, TO WANTING TO LISTEN TO HIM AND TO BEING DRAWN TO WHAT
HIM AND TO BEING DRAWN TO WHAT HE WAS SAYING ABOUT JESUS
HE WAS SAYING ABOUT JESUS CHRIST.
CHRIST. AND THEN I BEGAN TO DEFEND
AND THEN I BEGAN TO DEFEND HIM, WHEN MY FRIENDS MOCKED
HIM, WHEN MY FRIENDS MOCKED HIM AND SAID GET OUT OF HERE
HIM AND SAID GET OUT OF HERE AND USE CURSE WORDS, NO LET'S
AND USE CURSE WORDS, NO LET'S LISTEN TO WHAT HE'S SAYING.
LISTEN TO WHAT HE'S SAYING. HE'S OBVIOUSLY OKAY.
HE'S OBVIOUSLY OKAY. LOOK AT HIM.
LOOK AT HIM. WE WENT UP IN THE PARK HOUSE
WE WENT UP IN THE PARK HOUSE SORT OF LIKE A LITTLE KID, I
SORT OF LIKE A LITTLE KID, I BEGAN TO PRAY AND ASK JESUS IF
BEGAN TO PRAY AND ASK JESUS IF HE WOULD FORGIVE ME FROM MY
HE WOULD FORGIVE ME FROM MY SINS AND COME INTO MY LIFE AND
SINS AND COME INTO MY LIFE AND SAVE ME FROM THE LIFE I WAS
SAVE ME FROM THE LIFE I WAS IN, THE CONDITION I WAS IN,
IN, THE CONDITION I WAS IN, THE DEPRESSION AND EVERYTHING,
THE DEPRESSION AND EVERYTHING, I'M CRYING OUT TO HIM AND ASK
I'M CRYING OUT TO HIM AND ASK HIM IF HE WOULD FORGIVE ME AND
HIM IF HE WOULD FORGIVE ME AND SAVE ME AND BE MY LORD.
SAVE ME AND BE MY LORD. THE NEXT MONTHS THAT BEGAN TO
THE NEXT MONTHS THAT BEGAN TO FOLLOW I STILL HAD A STRUGGLE
FOLLOW I STILL HAD A STRUGGLE WITH HEROIN.
WITH HEROIN. IT JUST WOULD NOT BREAK.
IT JUST WOULD NOT BREAK. AND ONE PARTICULAR NIGHT WE
AND ONE PARTICULAR NIGHT WE WENT UP TO A ROOF A BUNCH OF
WENT UP TO A ROOF A BUNCH OF US STARTED TO SHOOT HEROIN WE
US STARTED TO SHOOT HEROIN WE BEGAN TO PASS AROUND A NEEDLE,
BEGAN TO PASS AROUND A NEEDLE, A BUNCH OF US SHOT.
A BUNCH OF US SHOT. A COUPLE OF MONTHS LATER I
A COUPLE OF MONTHS LATER I CONTRACTED HEPATITIS.
CONTRACTED HEPATITIS. AND I WENT TO MY BEDROOM AND I
AND I WENT TO MY BEDROOM AND I LITERALLY FELL DOWN AND SAID,
LITERALLY FELL DOWN AND SAID, LORD, I DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE
LORD, I DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE THIS.
THIS. I CAN'T STOP.
I CAN'T STOP. I JUST CAN'T.
I JUST CAN'T. I WANT TO FOLLOW YOU BUT I
I WANT TO FOLLOW YOU BUT I CAN'T STOP.
CAN'T STOP. I CRIED OUT TO THE LORD AND I
I CRIED OUT TO THE LORD AND I BEGAN TO SENSE THE PRESENCE OF
BEGAN TO SENSE THE PRESENCE OF THE LORD VERY, VERY STRONGLY
THE LORD VERY, VERY STRONGLY LIKE HE WAS OUTSIDE OF ME AND
LIKE HE WAS OUTSIDE OF ME AND IN ME AT THE SAME TIME.
IN ME AT THE SAME TIME. AGAIN, I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND
AGAIN, I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING THAT HAPPENED BEYOND
ANYTHING THAT HAPPENED BEYOND THAT EXPERIENCE.
THAT EXPERIENCE. BUT THE FOLLOW MONTH I WENT TO
BUT THE FOLLOW MONTH I WENT TO VISIT MY FRIEND GEORGE WHO WAS
VISIT MY FRIEND GEORGE WHO WAS MY SHOOTING PARTNER WHEN WE
MY SHOOTING PARTNER WHEN WE DID HEROIN TOGETHER, AND HE
DID HEROIN TOGETHER, AND HE WANTED TO GET ME BACK INTO
WANTED TO GET ME BACK INTO DRUGS SO HE PULLED OUT HIS
DRUGS SO HE PULLED OUT HIS NEEDLE AND HIS WORKS AND
NEEDLE AND HIS WORKS AND PULLED UP THE HEROIN AND PUT A
PULLED UP THE HEROIN AND PUT A TURN KIT AROUND MY ARM AND
TURN KIT AROUND MY ARM AND SHOT UP IN FRONT OF ME AND I
SHOT UP IN FRONT OF ME AND I HAD NO PULL WHATSOEVER.
HAD NO PULL WHATSOEVER. I LEFT THAT.
I LEFT THAT. GEORGE WASN'T OPEN TO THE
GEORGE WASN'T OPEN TO THE LORD.
LORD. I LEFT HIM AND I REALIZED GOD
I LEFT HIM AND I REALIZED GOD HAD DONE SOMETHING IN MY LIFE.
HAD DONE SOMETHING IN MY LIFE. THE NIGHT GOD BAPTIZED ME IN
THE NIGHT GOD BAPTIZED ME IN THE HOLY SPIRIT HE ABSOLUTELY,
THE HOLY SPIRIT HE ABSOLUTELY, ABSOLUTELY TOOK OUT OF ME THE
ABSOLUTELY TOOK OUT OF ME THE DESIRE TO GET HIGH.
DESIRE TO GET HIGH. FROM THAT TIME DECEMBER OF
FROM THAT TIME DECEMBER OF 1972, I'VE NEVER USED DRUGS
1972, I'VE NEVER USED DRUGS AGAIN.
AGAIN. BUT YOU SEE, HE DIED FOR OUR
BUT YOU SEE, HE DIED FOR OUR SINS.
SINS. HE DIED TO REMOVE THE
HE DIED TO REMOVE THE CONDEMNATION.
CONDEMNATION. ACTUALLY, SO THAT WHEN WE COME
ACTUALLY, SO THAT WHEN WE COME TO HIM IN THESE PLACES OF
TO HIM IN THESE PLACES OF BONDAGE HE WANTS TO TOUCH US.
BONDAGE HE WANTS TO TOUCH US. HE REALLY WANTS TO TOUCH US.
HE REALLY WANTS TO TOUCH US. THERE DOES HAVE TO BE THAT
THERE DOES HAVE TO BE THAT OPENING UP, THAT CRYING OUT IN
OPENING UP, THAT CRYING OUT IN THAT PLACE OF, LORD, I GIVE
THAT PLACE OF, LORD, I GIVE YOU THIS ABSOLUTE AUTHORITY TO
YOU THIS ABSOLUTE AUTHORITY TO CONTROL THIS THING.
CONTROL THIS THING. I GIVE IT TO YOU.
I GIVE IT TO YOU. SAVE ME HERE.
SAVE ME HERE. HE WANTS TO DO THAT FOR YOU.
HE WANTS TO DO THAT FOR YOU. >> WELL WE'VE BEEN LISTENING
>> WELL WE'VE BEEN LISTENING TO SOME PEOPLE THAT MADE A
TO SOME PEOPLE THAT MADE A DECISION TO SURRENDER THEIR
DECISION TO SURRENDER THEIR WILL AND LIFE TO THE CARE OF
WILL AND LIFE TO THE CARE OF GOD.
GOD. YOU KNOW, ALL MY LIFE, EVERY
YOU KNOW, ALL MY LIFE, EVERY TIME I WOULD COME TO GOD AND I
TIME I WOULD COME TO GOD AND I KNOW YOU'VE PROBABLY DONE THE
KNOW YOU'VE PROBABLY DONE THE SAME THING, BECAUSE I KNEW I
SAME THING, BECAUSE I KNEW I WAS GUILTY, I KNEW I HAD
WAS GUILTY, I KNEW I HAD SINNED AND DONE WRONG, I SAID,
SINNED AND DONE WRONG, I SAID, GOD, IF YOU FORGIVE ME I'LL
GOD, IF YOU FORGIVE ME I'LL NEVER DO IT AGAIN.
NEVER DO IT AGAIN. WELL, I DID IT AGAIN.
WELL, I DID IT AGAIN. SO I FELT LIKE I HAD LIED TO
SO I FELT LIKE I HAD LIED TO GOD.
GOD. SO I MUST NOT BE FORGIVEN.
SO I MUST NOT BE FORGIVEN. DO YOU KNOW WHAT?
DO YOU KNOW WHAT? BY TAKING THE APPROACH WE'RE
BY TAKING THE APPROACH WE'RE TALKING ABOUT AND THAT IS, I
TALKING ABOUT AND THAT IS, I MADE A DECISION TO SURRENDER
MADE A DECISION TO SURRENDER MY WILL AND LIFE TO THE CARE
MY WILL AND LIFE TO THE CARE OF GOD.
OF GOD. RATHER THAN PROMISING GOD I'LL
RATHER THAN PROMISING GOD I'LL NEVER SIN AGAIN.
NEVER SIN AGAIN. I DON'T WANT TO SIN, BUT I
I DON'T WANT TO SIN, BUT I KNOW IF I LIVE I'M GOING TO.
KNOW IF I LIVE I'M GOING TO. AND I KNOW HE LOVES ME.
AND I KNOW HE LOVES ME. BUT MY WILL AND MY LIFE AND MY
BUT MY WILL AND MY LIFE AND MY THOUGHTS AND MY EMOTIONS, MY
THOUGHTS AND MY EMOTIONS, MY EMOTIONS, MY ACTIONS, MY
EMOTIONS, MY ACTIONS, MY THOUGHTS AND MY ACTIONS, WHEN
THOUGHTS AND MY ACTIONS, WHEN I SURRENDER MY THOUGHTS AND
I SURRENDER MY THOUGHTS AND ACTIONS TO HIM, SOMETHING
ACTIONS TO HIM, SOMETHING WONDERFUL HAPPENS.
WONDERFUL HAPPENS. YOU SEE, GOD LOVED US SO MUCH
YOU SEE, GOD LOVED US SO MUCH THAT HE SENT HIS SON INTO THIS
THAT HE SENT HIS SON INTO THIS WORLD TO DIE FOR US.
WORLD TO DIE FOR US. JESUS DID FOR US IN THE FLESH,
JESUS DID FOR US IN THE FLESH, GOD DID FOR US IN THE FLESH
GOD DID FOR US IN THE FLESH THROUGH HIS SON JESUS AND THAT
THROUGH HIS SON JESUS AND THAT IS LIVE A PERFECT LIFE,
IS LIVE A PERFECT LIFE, PERFECT LAMB THAT TAKES AWAY
PERFECT LAMB THAT TAKES AWAY THE SINS OF THE WORLD.
THE SINS OF THE WORLD. I NEED THAT.
I NEED THAT. IF I WOULD SURRENDER TO HIS
IF I WOULD SURRENDER TO HIS WILL, HE HAS A WILL, HE HAS A
WILL, HE HAS A WILL, HE HAS A PLAN FOR OUR LIVES, HE HAS A
PLAN FOR OUR LIVES, HE HAS A PLAN FOR YOUR LIFE.
PLAN FOR YOUR LIFE. YOU MAY NOT KNOW WHAT IT IS,
YOU MAY NOT KNOW WHAT IT IS, BUT IF YOU SURRENDER YOUR
BUT IF YOU SURRENDER YOUR WILL, HE'LL SHOW YOU.
WILL, HE'LL SHOW YOU. AND IT WILL BE THE MOST
AND IT WILL BE THE MOST WONDERFUL LIFE YOU COULD EVER
WONDERFUL LIFE YOU COULD EVER DREAM OF.
DREAM OF. YOU SAY, HOW DO I DO THAT?
YOU SAY, HOW DO I DO THAT? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT THE BIBLE
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS, NOT RELIGION SAYS, BUT
SAYS, NOT RELIGION SAYS, BUT WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS, WHAT GOD
WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS, WHAT GOD SAYS.
SAYS. IN ROMANS 10:9 IF YOU CONFESS
IN ROMANS 10:9 IF YOU CONFESS WITH YOUR MOUTH THE LORD JESUS
WITH YOUR MOUTH THE LORD JESUS CHRIST AND BELIEVE IN YOUR
CHRIST AND BELIEVE IN YOUR HEART GOD RAISED HIM FROM THE
HEART GOD RAISED HIM FROM THE DEAD YOU SHALL BE SAVED.
DEAD YOU SHALL BE SAVED. VERSE 13 OF THE SAME CHAPTER,
VERSE 13 OF THE SAME CHAPTER, WHOSOEVER SHALL CALL ON THE
WHOSOEVER SHALL CALL ON THE NAME OF THE LORD SHALL BE
NAME OF THE LORD SHALL BE SAVED.
SAVED. SAVED DOESN'T JUST MEAN WE
SAVED DOESN'T JUST MEAN WE WON'T GO TO HELL.
WON'T GO TO HELL. IT MEANS THAT, BUT IT MEANS
IT MEANS THAT, BUT IT MEANS WHEN WE CALL ON HIS NAME, AT
WHEN WE CALL ON HIS NAME, AT THAT MOMENT WE WILL BE BROUGHT
THAT MOMENT WE WILL BE BROUGHT OUT, BROUGHT OUT OF DEATH INTO
OUT, BROUGHT OUT OF DEATH INTO LIFE.
LIFE. OUT OF BONDAGE INTO FREEDOM.
OUT OF BONDAGE INTO FREEDOM. SO LET'S DO IT.
SO LET'S DO IT. PRAY THIS PRAYER WITH ME.
PRAY THIS PRAYER WITH ME. IF YOU'LL SAY THESE WORDS, SAY
IF YOU'LL SAY THESE WORDS, SAY THEM LOUD ENOUGH SO YOU CAN
THEM LOUD ENOUGH SO YOU CAN HEAR THEM.
HEAR THEM. SAY THEM FROM YOUR HEART.
SAY THEM FROM YOUR HEART. PRAY THEM TO HIM.
PRAY THEM TO HIM. GOD WILL DO WHAT HE PROMISED.
GOD WILL DO WHAT HE PROMISED. PRAY THIS PRAYER WITH ME.
PRAY THIS PRAYER WITH ME. LORD JESUS, I BELIEVE YOU'RE
LORD JESUS, I BELIEVE YOU'RE THE SON OF GOD.
THE SON OF GOD. I KNOW I'M A SINNER.
I KNOW I'M A SINNER. AND I NOW SURRENDER TO YOU.
AND I NOW SURRENDER TO YOU. FROM THIS MOMENT ON, YOUR WILL
FROM THIS MOMENT ON, YOUR WILL BE DONE.
BE DONE. NOT MINE.
NOT MINE. I GIVE YOU MY BODY, MY WILL
I GIVE YOU MY BODY, MY WILL AND MY LIFE.
AND MY LIFE. THANK YOU, JESUS FOR THE GIFT
THANK YOU, JESUS FOR THE GIFT OF LIFE.
OF LIFE. IF YOU PRAYED THAT PRAYER, WE
IF YOU PRAYED THAT PRAYER, WE WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU.
WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU. THEY'LL BE A NUMBER COMING UP
THEY'LL BE A NUMBER COMING UP IN JUST A MOMENT ON THE
IN JUST A MOMENT ON THE SCREEN.
SCREEN. THEY'LL BE AN ADDRESS YOU CAN
THEY'LL BE AN ADDRESS YOU CAN WRITE TO.
WRITE TO. I WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU.
I WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU. YOU SURRENDERED, GOD'S IN
YOU SURRENDERED, GOD'S IN CONTROL, I PROMISE YOU, YOU'RE
CONTROL, I PROMISE YOU, YOU'RE HEADED TO THE LAND OF PROMISE.
HEADED TO THE LAND OF PROMISE. IT'S ALL YOURS BY LETTING GOD
IT'S ALL YOURS BY LETTING GOD GUIDE YOUR LIFE.
GUIDE YOUR LIFE. YOU WERE