Fresh Off The Boat With Eddie Huang: Taiwan (Part 3/3)

EDDIE HUANG: All right, let's go see these hot springs
everybody talks about.
LOUIS HUANG: Well this place used because the Hell Valley.
EDDIE HUANG: Hell Valley?
Why?
LOUIS HUANG: Because of the smell.
EDDIE HUANG: Oh my god.
All right, we just made a quick pit stop at the famous
Taiwanese hot springs, and it smells like
Eva Devine's butthole.
She ate a cum burrito.
That bitch is disgusting.

Let's go, Dad.
LOUIS HUANG: Whatever.
[MUSIC - TIDUS, "DELANCEY"]
[MUSIC PLAYING]
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

EDDIE HUANG: The first time I went to Din Tai Fung, I
was 12 years old.
And I'm telling you, this was the single greatest bite of
food I've ever had in my life.
You experience it and you're like, yo, I can't explain it.
There's something in the motherfucking water.
Bagels from New York, burritos from San Francisco--
this is that shit, and it is definitely a
transformative food.
And I can't say that about many things.

I've been working out a lot.
Do I look like I lost weight?
LOUIS HUANG: No, you look good.
EDDIE HUANG: Yeah, I look like I lost weight.
SERVER: [FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
EDDIE HUANG: [FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
Whoa, yo, yo, yo, instructions to eat soup dumplings.
Wait, they say to poke a hole though.
That's bullshit.
Hooligans poke holes.
This is wrong.
LOUIS HUANG: To cool off the soup inside the dumpling.
EDDIE HUANG: No, but remember when your friend taught us the
first time we came here?
We put it in the vinegar and just let it sit in the vinegar
to cool by itself.
Then you don't need to poke a hole, right?
LOUIS HUANG: That was my brother-in-law.
EDDIE HUANG: That was your brother-in-law?
LOUIS HUANG: That was my brother-in-law.
EDDIE HUANG: Yo, original Jedi, that guy.
But see, isn't that a better technique than poking holes?
LOUIS HUANG: Why poke a hole?
You don't have to.
EDDIE HUANG: Why poke holes?
There's other things to poke.
Your brother-in-law saved the poking for someone else.
LOUIS HUANG: This needs to be cut.

[MUSIC PLAYING]
EDDIE HUANG: So the trademark of these soup dumplings is
every single soup dumpling here has 18 folds.
You can see every single distinguished fold,
super hard to do.
And you see how they're perfectly bite-sized?
You go to a shitty place like Joe's Shanghai Soup Dumplings
in New York.
They're like giant, nasty soup dumplings.
Big and flat, like large areolas, like Paula Abdul
saucer nipples.
These are nice little dumplings.
How is it?
LOUIS HUANG: This is awesome.
This is awesome, great idea.

EDDIE HUANG: I like these better.
So, I got a surprise for you, Dad.
This just came out today.
The cover came out today.
You see?
LOUIS HUANG: Oh really?
EDDIE HUANG: That's you.
LOUIS HUANG: "Fresh Off the Boat"
EDDIE HUANG: Yup.
LOUIS HUANG: "Eddie Huang--
A Memoir."
EDDIE HUANG: You could cry.
You like to cover?
LOUIS HUANG: Yeah, very much, very much.
Show her.
See?
That's the cover of his book.
It's coming out next Chinese New Year, in February.
He's got a million dollar book.
EDDIE HUANG: Million dollar book.
There we go.
LOUIS HUANG: Make sure you buy it, OK?
Amazon.com--
you can buy Eddie Huang's memoir.
EDDIE HUANG: Love it.
This is my hype man.
What other hype man got a perm like this?
This dude's killing this perm.
LOUIS HUANG: I thought I'd dress up for this occasion.
EDDIE HUANG: I know.
Dad, do the [INAUDIBLE].
Go like this, go like this.
Go like this, do the [INAUDIBLE].
No, no, one hand like this-- the mirror--
I'll teach you.
Do the Rico, the [INAUDIBLE]
just like this.
LOUIS HUANG: Next time we do this, I'll wish I
still had my hair.
EDDIE HUANG: You still got plenty of hair.
The Soul Glow is treating you well.

Ready.

LOUIS HUANG: It's amazing, I was so disappointed
when he quit law.
Because that was three years' hard work.
I was very proud of him.
When he graduated, he got a job right away.
He passed the bar on the first try.
I was very happy that he's set for his life.
And then six months later, he broke the news.
He said, I quit.
I thought, I don't have to worry about Eddie anymore.
His [INAUDIBLE]
got his career all set.
But I'm glad he made a decision and did what he liked
to do, what he loved to do.
So it's very, very brave, very courageous.
Yeah, I'm proud of him.
EDDIE HUANG: He's about to do some shit.

All right, one, two, three.
Awesome, good.
LOUIS HUANG: Thank you.
SERVER: Thank you.
LOUIS HUANG: You have a customer now.
Those are the Japs.
EDDIE HUANG: [LAUGHS]
Got em.
All right, ready to go see grandpa?

[MUSIC PLAYING]
LOUIS HUANG: Basically what we do is respect the god, the
sky, the earth, everything else in between.
Bless all these people here.
They accompany us here today to pay respect--
me and my son, Eddie--
to pay respect to my father.
And they are the working crew, and I wish
everybody give them blessing.
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
The incense, the smoke and everything, is a message.
It's a communication between the sky, the earth, and
everything else in between.

WOMAN: [FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
EDDIE HUANG: [FOREIGN LANGUAGE].

Grandpa kind of looks like Chow Yun-Fat.
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]




[MUSIC - CLAUDE DEBUSSY, "CLAIR DE LUNE"]

EDDIE HUANG: So the thing is, I only met this
grandfather one time.
But ever since I was a kid, of all the people in my family,
he was definitely my role model.
This was the one man in both of my families on either side
that everyone only had good things to say.

LOUIS HUANG: [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

EDDIE HUANG: Grandpa, this money here is for you.
Don't spend it all in one place.
Don't let anyone jux you.
Got you.
[MUSIC - CLAUDE DEBUSSY, "CLAIR DE LUNE"]

So we burned him some money to buy Ewings, because they don't
have Ewings here.
But now we're going to burn him some things at the store.
LOUIS HUANG: Mercedes.
EDDIE HUANG: Yeah, of course.
We gotta get the red one, the red whip, cherry red Benz.
LOUIS HUANG: And the iPhone.
EDDIE HUANG: [FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
[MUSIC - CLAUDE DEBUSSY, "CLAIR DE LUNE"]

EDDIE HUANG: I would talk to this
grandpa when I was asleep.
And my dad doesn't know, my mom doesn't know, but I'd
always be like, man, I want to be like you.
It's funny like, 21st century, we came and we showed grandpa
the cover of our book on an iPhone.
It's ill, man.

[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
LOUIS HUANG: [FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

EDDIE HUANG: All right, I always grew up playing ball
with my dad.
And he don't know it right now, but he's about
to get balled on.

[MUSIC PLAYING]
EDDIE HUANG: We're in Taipei, balling.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
EDDIE HUANG: Yo dad, this is what you say.
This is "Fresh Off the Boat" in Taipei.
I'm Louis Huang and this is my seed.
We out.
That's it.
You got it?
Let him do it.
No, we'll see.
If it doesn't work, I'll do it.
LOUIS HUANG: I need an attitude.
EDDIE HUANG: Yeah, you got it.
Just be yourself, dad.
LOUIS HUANG: Yo, this is "Fresh Off the Boat" Taipei.
I'm Louis Huang.
This is my seed.
EDDIE HUANG: We out.