I CANNOT stain these carpets - Craigery Morgan


Uploaded by crgmorgan on 17.10.2010

Transcript:
So, I thought that I would share with you guys what happens in my everyday life.
Daddy for my fifth birthday party I demand that you buy me a pony.
I also would like a silken coin skort from Ability to Purge.
and a life sized cut out of Susie Carmichael from the classic television show RugRats.
In addition, I require two male geishas in hello kitty backpacks.
I want these things and I want them now Daddy.
Daddy you don't want me to tell Mommy what you and the plumber were doing yesterday do you?
I believe it involved a pipe snake.
pipe snake.
Richard, richard this is your grandmother. Listen to me.
I need your help.
I can't move my hands because I was sitting on the couch.
and and I can't move my hands now because I was sitting on my hands
and they fell asleep. Richard my colonoscopy bag is about to overflow
and I need your help
I cannot stain these carpets.
Uh....uh...em.....my name's Trevor.
and...uh....I can't....uh.....really....it's hard for me to speak sometimes.
talk...and...uh....I have this thing with my mouth. I don't know if you noticed or not. It's uh....
My bros are like...what's wrong with your mouth? I'm like....
It just does it.....so.....
I'm like OOH.....true.
Hey, my name is Sharon. Uh.
Umm.... I work at planned parenthood.
Umm....it is just the funnest time.
It's just the greatest job.
Umm, planned parenthood. Umm. Is a great place.
to umm.... I love planned parenthood.
Thank you so much for for your time today.
My name is La'Trehl and I am a graduate of the Mount Everest Technical School.
At Mount Everest you can do anything you want. Like, you know like I have kids. Like I work a job, like from 9 to 5.
and like there's no reason you can't get an education for yourself. There is no reason you cannot get an education for yourself.
Like listen to me.
I am fulfilling my life goal of becoming a dental assistant. A dental assistant.
Do you understand what I'm saying?
So ain't no more excuses. Don't make no more excuses for yourself.
You need to get off that couch.
I completed my degree in only 8 month. It took me a short 8 month to complete my degree.
And look man, I know you got to hold the house down, okay you need to hold that house down.
so in order to do that it's all about that fast money. You gotta get that fast money.
Can we do another take?
June, june. I just swear to Pete. I just swear to Pete June.
I just swear to Pete. June. June. June. I just swear to Pete June.
You can either get in the car and go home or you can eat your dinner.
either way it's no shit off my ass!
Umm....sometimes these stop by too.
Umm hi. I'm Ja'mie. I'm from Hilford Girls Grammar.
It's like a private school so there's no pavo people in it.
Umm, and umm yea I'm doing an exchange program
from Hilford and I'm going to Summer Heights High
Umm, I'm like so nervous.
Cause today's like my actual first day.
and like I woke up with sweat
and I forgot to feed the guinea pig
and umm luckily Mr. Camron was there. He's so hot for a teacher.
and umm they set me up with this girl named Ashton and she's like supposed to take me to classes.
and introduce me to her friends and stuff.
Umm and like I don't mean to be a bitch but she's like the fugliest girl I've ever met in my life.
Buh huh huh huh click
Yea ya know well [click] uh huh huh huh out here
out here at the uhh [click] huhuhuh Orlando Florida here and uhhh
[click] me and Carl are uhh gonna go to the uhh [click] the Disney World
and you know see the [click] you know mmm you know see the mouse.
and you know [click] the [click] uh huhhh you know the dog or [click]
what's its name? Neptune? [click] uhhh uhh you know [click] Mercury? Or buhhhuhuh Uranus.
Let me ask you a question
I was on my way to the Pick and Save you know
We out of toilet paper in my house.
and I came across this flyer for this house honey there's way too many zeros!
I think they have a term for this .....