Fat Jew Confronts His Dad About His Dick


Uploaded by vice on Jul 17, 2012

Transcript:

FAT JEW: So, as a parent, you consistently tried to set
boundaries, and I consistently did not want to
exist within them.
SOL: That is what parents do.
You have to set boundaries.

FAT JEW: The thing is, I do have to say, I have to blame
you for my small penis.
That's your fault.
SOL: No, that's your mother's side of the family.
Yes, it is.
FAT JEW: I've seen--
I mean, not to make it weird, but I've seen your penis.
SOL: Yeah.
FAT JEW: I guess it's probably been about 10 years, but I saw
your penis about 10 years ago.
SOL: It was cold.
It was the middle of winter.
FAT JEW: You were in the house.
The heat was on.
And your penis just looked like a chestnut, like a fat,
little chestnut.
SOL: All right, son.
FAT JEW: That's your fault.
Not to be like, it's my dad's fault!
But you gave me a small dick.
SOL: OK.
FAT JEW: No?
SOL: No.
I still think you probably--
you know, you did have that nearsighted problem.
FAT JEW: So now it's my vision.
SOL: Yeah.
FAT JEW: All right, if you want to be a jerk about it,
not only your dick was fat like a chestnut, it was kind
of mangled.
It was not--
you don't have a good-looking dick.
SOL: Once again--
FAT JEW: You're a nice-looking guy.
I'm not saying you're not a nice-looking guy.
I'm saying you don't have a nice-looking dick.
SOL: OK, but, you know, I hate to lay this at your mother's
doorstep once again--
FAT JEW: Right.
SOL: --but--
FAT JEW: Don't lay anything involving my penis at my
mother's doorstep.
That's just--
that's weird.
SOL: Oh, well.
FAT JEW: That's weird.
SOL: Well, most parents would probably be embarrassed to
even sit here and talk to you about it.
FAT JEW: Yeah, but you're kind of an open dude.
SOL: Well, sure.
FAT JEW: You're an open guy.