Game of Thrones? - 4/2/12 (FULL EP)

BETH HOYT: Hey guys.
I did not win the lottery.
I'm back from My Damn Channel Live.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
BETH HOYT: What's up.
I'm Beth Hoyt, and this is My Damn Channel Live.
It's Monday, and that means we have a tight,
10-minute show for you.
If you haven't subscribed yet, why.
But also, do it now, right now, do it right now.
I'm all business today.
I mean, kind of-- except for that, kind of.
But on Wednesday's show, we have more time together.
It's a full half an hour show, and this week, we have special
guest David Wayne.
OK.
Back to today.
Um, did you guys have a good April Fools?
I--
I played a really great joke yesterday.
I was like, um, if you buy the most expensive cupcake, then
it doesn't have any calories.
That's what I said.
And I tricked-- um, I tricked myself.
It was so good, I totally fell for it.
It was a $6 cupcake.
Get on my thighs.
Totally over it.
Um, but you know what I'm not over.
Have you guys seen April Fools YouTube Collections video?
Here's a bit of it.
-A YouTube Collection isn't just a sampling of YouTube.
It's all of YouTube.
Every YouTube video uploaded, ever.
As soon as you sign up, we'll dispatch a fleet of 175
YouTube trucks to your home.
Your nested video modules will arrive securely shrink-wrapped
on pre-categorized pallets.
If you live on a steep grade or in an area with low
overpasses, your DVDs will be delivered by pack mule.
BETH HOYT: I had to swallow.
Wow, we're live.
Can I just order a DVD of pack mules videos, is
what I want to know.
And then can I have it delivered on pack mules.
That would be--
that's what I want.
So you guys left a lot of comments on our YouTube page
after Friday's show, and I want you to know that you are
being heard.
So I'm going to try to answer as many of them in two
minutes as I can.
Let's go.
This is from Jesusisnotreal1.
He says, "You're boring." Um.
You're boring, and I don't like your face.
Xsuit says, "Am I the only one who'd like to see more of Beth
Hoyt singing?
It just had the cutest quirkiness to
it." Uh, thank you.
And you might be.
You might-- you might be the only one.
Uh, Max5tat5 says, "Was too busy getting my groove on at
the DISCO," capital letters--
DISCO--
"last night to watch." Now, I forgive you.
I--
I'm--
I think that's awesome you went to the disco.
I don't know enough people who go to the disco.
And you're forgiven for not watching it, but you can also
watch it later.
So if you missed it, you can go to mydamnchannel.com/live,
and watch it there.
So I think that my rule of thumb is that if you're at the
disco, that excuse is valid to me.
I will take that excuse.
Mrnividium says, "The audio for this
video was way too quiet.
I had everything on my laptop turned up 100% and could still
just barely hear what was being said." Uh, well then the
solution for that is when you [SILENCE]
so did-- if you-- did you do that?
And then that will solve it, I think.
Just kidding.
But also, for real, we are sorry about that.
We're a new show, and we're figuring it out.
So let's us know if that keeps happening or that's an issue,
and we'll get on top of that.
Uh, caminvasion said, "I missed it
today," uh, frowny face.
"Damn," dot dot dot "channel," dot dot dot "my," dot dot
"wut," spelled W-U-T. Uh, I don't know what that ending
part meant with the dots and the W-U-T. I don't--
I is that sign--
I don't know if that's some sort of secret code.
But also, you just missing it, with a frowny face.
I appreciate you letting me know, but I mean, like I said,
disco is an excuse.
Your excuses don't count.
Uh.
Joshua94ism, "There should be a day of the month that Beth
and Grace are on at the same time with each other.
But it would probably be too much awesomeness to handle."
Well, you better figure out how you're going to handle
that, cause that probably will happen.
So work on that.
Adamhenry3, "You remind me of the crazy girl from Homeland,
which is a good thing." It's Claire Danes, thanks.
Uh, I can do her cry face.
Do you wanna see.
Um.
OK.
Well, now I'm laughing.
But yeah, crying.
Uh--
Mom.
She just cries, like with everything.
Like, with, uh, her lashes commercial.
Like, when your lashes grow--
Anyway, she does that.
Music19910, "Wow that was quick," they say.
Yeah, exactly.
Ninjasaywhat says, "fo sho." It's spelled out like "fo
sho," I didn't choose to say that.
"Tell her to get some class and put down that Miller Lite.
It'll give you mud butt."
I don't know--
I don't know--
what mud butt is.
Also--
Miller Lite can be classy.
It's-- you know, depends on how you-- but also I don't
know what mud butt--
I hope--
is that when you poop in your pants?
Or is that when you like, fall at a concert when it's been
raining, and you're drinking and--
I--
I don't know.
I will try not to--
I don't know what that is.
Theplagueofarachnus says, I keep watching myse-- catch--
"I keep catching myself wandering while waiting for it
to start, then realizing it's like eight minutes after.
Then when I get here, there's like two seconds
left." Frowny face.
I mean, that's a lot of words to say you missed the show.
Also, I think your math is off, because
the show's 10 minutes.
Just figure that out for yourself.
I appreciate you letting me know, but figure it out.
Set a little timer.
OK.
That's all the time we have for the comments today.
That was a lot of comments.
I must rest for a moment.
Videos, take over now.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
-All right, you guys.
My Damn Channel is doing fantastic, but we do need to
get a little bit edgier.
Does anybody have any ideas.
-Um, what if we renamed the channel my [BLEEP]
[BLEEP]
[BLEEP]
Channel.
-Too edgy.
Little bit.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
[MUSIC PLAYING]
[KNOCKING]
-Let's go.
Running in place.
Let's move it.
Move those legs.
Move those legs.
Hands high.
Hands high.
Hands low.
Hands low.
[EXPLOSIONS]
[GUNFIRE]
-Billy, Billy.
Hang in there, Billy.
Hang in there.
-This game is awesome.
-No.
It's not, Billy.
[EXPLOSIONS]

[MUSIC PLAYING]
BETH HOYT: Oh, that was kind of violent, OK.
Let's take a break from all this war, and let's talk about
something fun.
And I have to warn you, we're going to be
talking spoilers here.
So you've been warned.
Now Game of Thrones Season 2 debuted last night, and
everyone is totally on board with this show.
I don't--
I don't know how I missed it.
I missed the books and the--
I--
I don't know anything about it.
But I love fantasy.
Remember The Last Unicorn and NeverEnding Story.
I need more of that my life, that kind of stuff.
So we brought in someone--
that is very, very special to get me up to speed.
You're probably wondering who this is.
Please welcome Eric Grundhauser.
He's our Game of Thrones expert.
Thank you for being here, Eric.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Hello, hello.
BETH HOYT: Yay.
So tell me what-- um, how do you play the game.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Well Beth, actually, it's more of a war
than a game.
BETH HOYT: Oh.
Oh, OK.
OK.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: But it's still a lot of fun.
BETH HOYT: Great.
Awesome.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: So I'll maybe run you through some of
the main characters are kind of bring you up to speed.
BETH HOYT: Cool.
Sure
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Uh, first off, we have Ned Stark.
BETH HOYT: Mm.
Sean Bean.
I love him.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Yes.
He's dead.
BETH HOYT: The main character is dead.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Yes.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
That's ballsy.
OK.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: So we'll move on.
Uh, this is uh, Queen Regent Cersei Lannister--
BETH HOYT: She's beautiful.
Mm-hmm.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: --and her brother, Jamie Lannister.
BETH HOYT: Ooh, very Orlando Bloom-y.
Yeah.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Uh, they're having sex.
BETH HOYT: The brother and sister are having sex.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Oh yeah.
BETH HOYT: So they don't know they're brother and sister.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: No, they know.
BETH HOYT: They know.
And they're OK.
Wow.
So that's just going to go there.
OK.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Um this-- this is their son, the current
king, Geoffrey.
BETH HOYT: Sure.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Yes.
He's also a bit of a--
a psychopath.
He-- he cut out a man's tongue for fun.
BETH HOYT: Oh my god.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: In front of him on the court.
BETH HOYT: Wow, he's a-- that is a bad boy.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Boys will be boys.
BETH HOYT: Sure.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Um, this is Tyrion Lancaster.
BETH HOYT: Oh, this one looks bad.
I bet he's bad.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: No, he's actually the most-- one of the
most honorable people in the kingdom.
Uh--
BETH HOYT: Really.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Yeah.
He only kills people when he absolutely has to.
BETH HOYT: Oh, gosh.
That-- they also seem to do that, huh.
So those are-- those are the main characters.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Well, I mean--
there's 30 or 40 more main characters, but it, you know--
BETH HOYT: Wow.
Yeah, OK.
So.
Ma-- let's how about you debrief me, like maybe like
the bullet points of the plot of season one?
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Sure, sure.
We'll just do it-- yeah, OK.
Well, season one.
Starts out when a 10-year-old boy is pushed out of a window
and then paralyzed from the waist down because he
witnessed the royal incest.
BETH HOYT: Oh.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Oh, then-- oh, well, actually.
I gotta--
I have to mention.
There is also the exiled 12-year-old princess who, uh,
was married off to a murderous Dothraki horse lord.
But it's OK, he stopped raping her once they got
to know each other.
BETH HOYT: Oh my--
OK.
Sorry.
And then what happened with Sean Bean.
What happened there.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Oh.
He was beheaded in front of his daughters.
BETH HOYT: Why?
What did he do?
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: He--
tried to be a good man.
BETH HOYT: OK.
And that's not a-- that's not a good thing.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Not-- not in Westeros.
BETH HOYT: Sure.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: But-- but--
his daughters made it out OK.
Uh, his one daughter is now the captive of
Geoffrey and Cersei.
And his other daughter managed to escape.
Uh, she just had to pretend to be a boy and, uh, duh kill
someone on her way out of the castle.
BETH HOYT: Wow.
That seems like a--
OK.
So that was season one.
Cool.
What happened--
what happened last night in the first
episode of season two?
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Oh, it was incredibly exciting.
And very complicated.
BETH HOYT: Yeah.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: All you kind of have to know is they had
gathered all these babies together, right--
BETH HOYT: Aw--
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: --and they began to kill them.
BETH HOYT: Oh my--
OK, OK.
Oh my god.
This-- is it just seems--
really awful.
It just seems really bad.
I don't-- why does everyone love it.
I don't understand.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Well, I mean, the
storytelling is amazing.
And the special effects are incredible.
I mean, the-- the-- you know, it's a very high budget show.
Oh, and lots of nudity.
BETH HOYT: OK.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: I mean, lots and lots of nudity.
BETH HOYT: Mm-hmm.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Uh, oh-- oh-- and baby dragons.
BETH HOYT: It has baby dragons?
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: There are absolutely baby dragons.
BETH HOYT: I love-- you should have said that earlier.
I love baby dragons--
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: I have a lot going on--
BETH HOYT: I'm all in.
I'm-- so thank you, Eric, I'm totally a hardcore fan.
Love it.
ERIC GRUNDHAUSER: Great.
BETH HOYT: So is this guy.
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OZZIE OSBOURNE: I'm Ozzie Osbourne, and you're watching
My Damn Channel.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
BETH HOYT: That's it for today.
I love you.
Thanks for watching.
Now please like--
I mean--
please, um, like the.
I want to say, Like, Comment, and Subscribe.
Yes.
Not please like-- like-- you know.
I'll see you tomorrow at 4:00 PM Eastern for another 10
minute show, and then on Wednesday for a big half an
hour show with party tricks and David Wayne.
Also, be nice.
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