NHS Choose Well - Funny Christmas Special - Who am I?

JOHN>> Am I a Man?
TONY>> No.
JOHN>> No?
TONY>> Take a shot.
JOHN>> I’ve just had one.
TONY>> If it’s no, you take a shot.
JOHN>> Your go.
TONY>> Ok, right, I’m a woman, yeah?
JOHN>> You’ve asked this.
TONY>> I know I know I’m a woman, but am I fit?
JOHN>> No, well, yeah, you used to be.
TONY>> Is that a yes or a no?
JOHN>> Ask another.
TONY>> Am I alive?
JOHN>> Yeah. How long has he been in there now?
TONY>> Not long.
JOHN>> I wish he’d hurry up.
TONY>> Am I married?
JOHN>> Oh... I don’t know.
TONY>> I either am or I’m not!
JOHN>> You’re going to have ask another.
TONY>> Can I not just take a shot?
JOHN>> Go on then. Give me one.
TONY>> It’s hard this game, innit?
JOHN>> I tell you what - I might hang out here a bit more often.
TONY>> I know, there’s some proper totty in here tonight.
JOHN>> You’re telling me.
JOHN>> I wish Rick would hurry up. He’s been ages.
TONY>> I know, he can't be that long.
JOHN>> I’m up for moving on anyway.
RICK>> There’s nothing they could do. They said it would take a few days to wipe off.
It's not funny, I've got to meet my girlfriend’s Mum and Dad for the first time later.
BARBARA>> We get people like this in here all the time. Everyone likes a bit of fun,
but we all know that alcohol can make you do the daftest things.
So, if you’re out and about this festive season, remember that the A and E department
is for accidents and emergencies only.
Remember your local pharmacy, not A and E.
TONY>> There you go mate.