Kpop Music Mondays - B1A4 "Beautiful Target"


Uploaded by simonandmartina on 26.09.2011

Transcript:
[music]
This week's Music Monday is the Firefighter edition
with B1A4's "Beautiful Target"
[music]
With "OK" and now "Beautiful Target" we can see that B1A4
is definitely going for a cutey boy image
which I feel opposes their Conqueror of Kitties look.
Now, the cutey boy image is not my personal cup of tea,
but it actually doesn't bother me this time around
because all the members seem to be having a genuinely good time
You guise remember SHINee's cutey boy video "Hello"?
Taemin was a totally natural cutey boy
and he loved every minute of that video
While Minho seemed a little bit awkward
as he was straining to hold back his manly manly manfulness
I think that as bands start to get older,
that cutey boy image can begin to be a strain for some of the members
but so far B1A4 seems to be pulling it off nicely,
so I'm ok with it.
I was really surprised when I heard that
B1A4 CONQUEROR OF KITTIES
had a new Jamaican reggae member in it.
Wow. I have no idea what you're talking about.
Umm, did you hear the deep voiced Jamaican guy in the last song?
No?
That's what I thought.
HEAR ME NOW! LORDAMERCY!
ALL MY BEAUTIFUL DOCKET
JOOM JOOM JOOM LIKE A LOCKET SHABBA!
Girl flex! Time for have sex uh!
Ok so it's pretty clear that this video's not supposed to be taken seriously
it's supposed to be lighthearted and fun
so we're not going to hold it up to the same standards that we would
like, say, TVXQ's "Before You Go" or Beast's "Fiction"
They're just acting cute and fun and playing with each other
and they're doing the best job they can at
CONQUERING KITTIES AND TEENAGED GIRLS' HEARTS!
That being said, this song and video just aren't for us.
This is clearly a fanservice video
because it solely focuses on the bandmates
playing with each other and being endearing
and so, for all the Bana's out there, this video would be awesome.
But, if I tried to introduce my non Kpop friends into
B1A4
I think they'd be disinterested because of all the
closeup shots of them making cute faces
the extremely awkward fashion
and the hyperexaggerated overacting
I'm a little bit worried that this is the kind of video
that non-kpop fans would show their friends and be like
"wow, this video's so weird," instead of
"wow, Kpop is really cool"
Plus, I don't know what to make of the plot of the video
it feels like there's a plot in there,
but then it ends up being a clusterduck of different stories.
I think the beginning of the video starts off pretty clear
There's a monkeyman/scientist guy
and he creates a girl out of what seems to be Kool-Aid
And that shocks the hell out of his friends
who thought he was just like a dirty old hermit
and, due to his really weird and hermit-like nature,
he takes her on a date
TO THE CREEPIEST DESERTED TOWN I HAVE EVER SEEN
In the meantime, his friends have been secretly tailing him
in an attempt to cockblock their relationship
when the otel catches on fire.
That's right. Not hotel, OTEL
Then suddenly there's like a newsbroadcast about the fire
and then his friend turns into a firefighter
and then his other friend turns into a paramedic
who I'm sure is not certified
and then he starts hitting on his friend's girlfriend
and starts looking up her skirt and she's like "DON'T TOUCH ME"
and then the guy who's the camera guy
he's just so ugly, and then he's suddenly there
and he's like, blowing his crotch
and what's going on
and then suddenly they disappear and then they're all in court
and where did the girl go?
and then suddenly the news broadcast guy is defending the guy in court
and then the cameraman is there
and then he goes to jail
and his friends are like [WTF]
I don't understand what happened.
*sobs*
Ok, I think I can help out here.
By the end of the video, it degenerates into
what I can only call a bachelorette party gone wrong.
Hire a bunch of cute guise and dress them up as themed strippers
Oh! I'm a sexy fireman! Here to put out your fires! ANG!
Oooh! I'm a sexy paramedic! Can I give you mouth to mouth? ANG!
OOOH! I'm a sexy judge. Here to give you my...
Lethal injection. It's the death penalty for you baby. ANG!
And then you see them wear all that chachy plastic jewelry
that you can buy from party stores.
We got watch necklaces and party hats
and even blow me whistles.
That's right. His necklace says "Blow Me" on it.
Blow me.
Maybe in South Korea blow me has a different meaning
than what it means to me as a North American
because when I see "blow me" then I think
HAY SIMON!
He's got that big teddy bear on his sweater
you can talk about that!
Oh yes! A Teddy Bear!
That's a great thing to focus on instead of the Blow Me whistle.
[music]
The dancing in this video wasn't really typical of most Kpop videos
It didn't really focus on precise choreography
and everyone dancing in unison.
It was more just of them breaking out into dance periodically
and having a good time
and even though it wasn't that serious, I quite enjoyed it.
Even though the random Sprout dancing scene
was a cute addition to the courtroom
I still like the movie theatre dancing the best.
I really like how all the members joined in slowly
just kind of like windup robots.
[music]
[our poor cover of the song]
[more music]
As for the English of the song, we give this a
Negative 5 out of 5.
Wow. What a huge mess of garbled thoughts and terrible pronunciation.
And every last one of you can admit that.
We didn't even know that there was so much English in the song
until we looked it up online.
Joom Joom heart like a locket,
even if it wasn't terribly pronounced,
would still not make any sense.
It's very similar to T-ara's YAYAYA
In that both the English and Korean
are a terrible catastrophe of nonsense.
But you know what...I think I understand what happened here.
Ok people listen up.
I'm sick and tired of Martina and Simon
saying that Kpop Music Videos don't match the lyrics of the song.
so today we're gonna do something monumental.
we're gonna look at the lyrics of the song
and we're gonna match it to the kpop music video perfectly.
George! I need you to get on the phone and get me a monkey mask.
Don't ask any questions!
Suzy! Call up Mr. Brohoho. I need 200 awkward party shop prop necklaces.
Marina. Yes you! Get over here!
I need you to find me the ugliest and most awkward cameraman you can find.
Alright people. GOGOGOGOGOGOGGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGGO.
[awkard silence]
Oh! I've made such a terrible mistake!
BROHOHO!
Do you want 200 more of the Blow Me keychains,
Or do you want the awkward Dalmatian chef hat keychains?
Broho!
[music]
Last week we asked you which music video was sadder.
JYJ's "In Heaven" or 2AM's "You Wouldn't Answer My Calls"
And the winner was JYJ
Although I feel like you guise were just
voting for JYJ no matter what we said,
because I feel that 2AM's video was WAYYYY SADDER.
I teared up and choked up and cried when I watched that video.
Anyways.
For this week's firefighter edition
we ask you who makes the better firefighter.
Hyori in "Mr. Big" or B1A4 in "Beautiful Target"
Leave your votes in the comments, or in our Facebook poll,
and we'll announce the winners next week.
Also, thanks to the thousand minions of B1A4
CONQUEROR OF KITTIES AND DEVOURER OF TEENAGE HEARTS
who voted for "Beautiful Target" this week.
If there's a video you want to see us do for next week's Music Monday
head on over to http://www.eatyourkimchi.com/requests
and tell us who we should do a video for.
Don't forget to like and favorite this video
and subscribe for more Kpop Music Mondays.
Take it away Spudgy!
[music]