Daddy Skills (music video) - [funny] [daddy rap]

>> Sam Deezy, what's happenin, man?
>> DJDave, man, good to see you, good to have you back in The Bay for a minute.
>> It's always nice to be here, man. Hey...
Every time I come, dude, you're further down this, like, road to full "daddyhood". It's crazy.
>> I guess so, man. That's my life right now, pretty much.
>> I believe it, dude. Hey, just checking it from my perspective, man?
Damn, dude, you got daddy skills. When did that happen?
I guess I kinda picked it up while you were busy rappin'
Man. That's a trip, it feels like just last year We were runnin' around playing beach football and drinking beer
I know, right? It's kinda crazy how time flies
I'm sayin', dude, look at you, all mature and wise
Well...
It's impressive man, I gotta say
But what's it like starting out every single day?
It's real early in the morning when the little one drops in
What, no sleeping in?
No, that's no longer an option
But once I did sleep until 7:08
Wait, that's a good thing?
Nah, man that was great! >> Damn...
It's cool though, I don't really sweat this
We play a bit and then we move along to breakfast
Which can sometimes feel almost like a dope deal
You want some eggs? >> No!
Cereal? >> No!
I got pancakes >> No!
Oatmeal? >> yeah.
Start the day with good calories
And keep your eye out for food allergies
No joking, man, this food can be too scary
But no choking cuz you know I cut the grapes AND the blueberries >> That's gangster.
Communicate with no anguish
She can use the words, or we got the baby sign language
I use all the techniques, it's all fair game
>> Even the classics? >> Even spoon airplane.
Damn, dude, you got daddy skills. When did that happen?
>> Well, I guess I kinda picked it up while you were busy rappin'
>> Man. That's a trip, it feels like just last year We were runnin' around playin beach football and drinking beer
I know, right? It's kinda crazy how time flies
I'm sayin', dude, look at you, all mature and wise >> Well...
It's impressive man, I gotta admit
But what's it like when they have to take a shhhhhhh?
I'm on point real quick when the diaper sags
I got the whole changing unit in the diaper bag >> Right...
And when the odor's getting riper...
In two minutes flat, yo, I can change that diaper! >> Whaaaaat?
The changing table set up nice
And get the deuce cleaned up with just two wipes >> Whoooo!
And get the outfit right and don't stress
Don't want the people saying: >> "I think her daddy got her dressed"
Barrette clipped in tight.
But no pig tails?
Man, those are daddy kryptonite
But now we're ready to hit the road >> No doubt.
Get the spare socks with the spare Crocs and we're out.
Damn, dude, you got daddy skills. When did that happen?
Well you know I kinda picked it up while you were busy rappin'
Man. That's a trip it feels like just last year We were runnin' around playin beach football and drinking beer
I know, right? It's kinda crazy how time flies
I'm sayin', dude, look at you, all mature and wise
Well...
It's impressive man, for real, no doubt
But what's it like when you have to leave the house?
Well, when its time to head out to the hustle n' bustle
Put her in the car seat and pull ALL my back muscles
But you gotta move quick, man, and fight through the pain
And keep the ride short! So we don't all go insane.
Hit the playground and everyone starin'
As we roll up in the tricked out Maclaren
Now we're bouncing all around with the ground squishy
And I'm a role model going down the slide on my tushie
Making this strange chatter with the dads and moms
>> How old? >> So cute! >> Well he's coming along!
But you gotta play the game, you can't hesitate
And if your game's right, you might even score yourself a playdate
>> Oh ok, I'm seein what you're talkin' 'bout
>> And pretty soon you see your kiddie gettin' tuckered out
But when my girl's gettin' hungry and a little chippy
I got the snack in the back AND a backup sippy >> Uh!
Damn, dude, you got daddy skills, when did that happen?
Well you know I kinda picked it up while you were busy rappin' >> Man...
That's a trip it feels like just last year We were runnin' around playing beach football and drinking beer
>> I know, right? It's kinda crazy how time flies
>> I'm sayin', dude, look at you, all mature and wise >> Well...
It's good stuff, you seem happy.
Well I hate to brag but I got shwag that says number one >> "Daddy!"
>> You got daddy skills.
>> (...riiiiight....)
>> Damn, dude, you got daddy skills.
>> Got, like, 6 copies of "Goodnight Moon", too.
>> Nah, I'm saying', you got daddy skills!
>> (hey dude, where is that green sheep... you seen that green sheep?)
>> For real, you got daddy skills.
>> Cuz we don't sleep!!!
>> (...no, seriously, we don't sleep nearly enough, man, I'm exhausted...)
>> (...is it naptime yet?...)
[the beat fades out...]