A Day in the Life of a Resident (episode 3)

Uploaded by SunnybrookMedia on 29.10.2012

So dealing with death is something that you're not taught, I don't think you can really be
taught how to do that, it's something, more of like a life skill

My first code blue I was in the emergency department
and it was my third shift in the emerg as a medical student.
I had this very young individual, a 37-year-old,
came in without vital signs so I was actively
involved in the code team doing chest compressions, helping push medications,
and set up IVs. And so we were able to bring back vital signs
three times, he coded three times, and after that
it was called off by the family.
And it was hard for me. I cried
um, I was very struck by it emotionally
and I actually had to go home early from the shift because I was so struck by it.
And I rememeber calling my mom
and it's all you can think about, what could I have done differently.
Did we miss something? And it's hard
but what I realized is you really need to talk about these things and you
want to respect confidentiality with patients but you also need to get out your own
emotions, you can't bottle that up. So I just talk about things now
and every death affects you
but since then it hasn't been that week-long thing
I realize it's a natural process of life. Sometimes I think I'm becoming
desensitized because you see it every day, you have a patient every day
who is dying but every so often you have that one patient and I always think
this is someone's loved one, this is someone's friend, this is someone's family member, mother, brother, sister,
father and so I always think of it in that context and that way you don't become
detached. You become better at dealing with it but you never
forget that this is somebody, and this is somebody to somebody.