Game Program Attack! - Mineshaft (Ep #4)


Uploaded by MondoMedia on 18.05.2012

Transcript:
[Green:] Ah, when I get that loot, finally gonna get that boat.
Fresh air and sunshine for the rest of my life.
[Yellow:] That's dumb.
I'm gonna buy a drilling machine so I can get to the bottom faster.
[Green:] What? No, the point of these expeditions
is to get rich finding stuff, and to uncover lost civilizations.
[Yellow:] Nice try. I'm gonna get there first and then I'll win.
[Green:] Just remember your training.
[Yellow:] What? [Green:] You know!
Staggered, crisscrossing steps so we can cover a wider grid?
[Yellow:] Oh, is that the system? Because I have a different system.
Move dirt!
[Green:] You just dug straight down, didn't you.
[Yellow:] MOVE
DIRT.
[Green:] You're not gonna find any treasure
without following the system.
Oh ho ho!
I found tin ore!
See, this is how it works.
Tin can be used in a wide variety of manufacturing capacities.
I am contributing to society.
[Yellow:] Hey, I found a door!
[Green:] Great job...
Being lucky.
Mark the door and we'll cross-reference with those maps we found on the other dig.
[Yellow:] Hey, it's filled with gold!
And rubies or emeralds or whatever.
[Green:] Well... are they rubies or are they emeralds?
[Yellow:] What the hell do I know about rocks?
This is a dumb system for money.
[Green:] Well what do we have here?
Tie game, bro! Tied the whole game up.
Looks like ol' Green just got himself a door.
[Yellow:] Nice. I just found another door, too!
[Green:] Mark it.
[Yellow:] BOOB ROOM!
[Green:] What? That's not a thing!
[Yellow:] Oh, it's a thing.
It's a thing and it likes my thing.
And my thing likes it back.
HARD.
[Green:] What grid are you in?
[Yellow:] The boob grid!
Get over here and help me!
I only have two hands and one mouth.
[Green:] It's not on the map!
[Yellow:] I discovered it!
I'm god, king of boob room!
[Green:] Oh yeah? Well, according to the ancient map,
my room is filled with all-you-can-eat shrimp
and redheads with no standards.
Oh god, zombies!
Zombies that smell like fish!
[Yellow:] What color is their hair?
[Green:] The color of death!
Must dig way out!
Hey! I found another door.
[Yellow:] Me too.
Puppy room!
[Green:] Damn it!
Damn everything!
I'll show you! Show everybody!
[Yellow:] Their fur is so soft!
[Green:] Green wife? [Wife:] What are you doing here?
[Green:] Me? What are you doing!
[Wife:] I - I didn't want you to find out like this.
[Red:] Or at all, really.
[Wife:] Oh god, zombies!
[Green:] Don't change the subject, you green whore.
[Wife:] No. Zombies!
[Green:] Oh god, zombies!
(Screaming)
[Yellow:] Heeheehee, puppies.
Heh. C'mere.