If Dogs Really Played Poker | Heavy Petting Originals


Uploaded by HEAVYPETTING on 09.10.2012

Transcript:
And then there were four: Max, Roxy, Jim Jam and Dr. Bones. On the outside, four noble
dogs. In here, the four best poker playing dogs in the world. Hey everybody, welcome
to the 2012 Canine World Series of Poker. I'm Gary Andrews. And I'm Lou Roberts, and
we have a tremendous event here for you today: Four of the titans of the canine poker circuit.
Let's get right to it. The first hand is out, let's go to the Cardcam to take a quick look.
Max starting off with pocket Jacks. Strong hand, Lou. Indeed. And then an interesting
move by all the players to not look at their cards. Ooh, check out Roxy -- she's hopped
off her chair and is now getting a drink from one of the complementary bowls. Roxy's been
going to that red bowl an awful lot. What do you think's in there? Roxy has a deal with
Cristal. She drinks it and they give it to her for free. Too rich for my blood, but boy
can Roxy slurp that stuff down. It's quite a deal. How does that benefit them? And we're
waiting for Jim-Jam to make the first bet. But I tell you what, he seems to be in no
rush, smelling things -- is that a tactic that's common practice, Lou? Well, it can
be. Getting your opponent to look at you smelling things often will get them off their own cards
and their own game. Or he could just be interested in the smells of things. He is a dog. I've
been there. What? How's Dr. Bones' hand looking? Whoa, things are not looking good for the
good doctor, Lou. We're not getting a lot of game moves out there, but we are getting
a lot of panting, drooling and the occasional barking. To be fair, that barking was in regards
to a loud motorcycle that drove by earlier. It deserved it. Um hmm. Max, I'll tell you
what, he maybe short on skill, but he is a good dog. Oh, look at him there now. He either
wants a new card or perhaps a treat. Either way, give it to him! Right. Look at him laying
down. Whoa, and there he pops up. Just when you think you know what he's gonna do, he
surprises you. A sign of a good poker player. Um hmm, and a good woman. Ooh. He's jumping
up, putting his paws on the table. There's someone who's very invested in the flop. He
needs a good card and he knows it. Give me that flop card. I need an Ace. I wanna kick
the spread. I use and English accent whenever I use his voice. Looks like he's eating a
treat off the table and walking away. Well, there's a dog well taught by Kenny Rogers.
You gotta know when to eat your treats and know when to fold them. Interesting note about
Jim Jam, Lou, he was rescued from Thailand and brought to America. Lots of dogs in Thailand.
Wow, that is interesting. Oh, now look at Jim Jam over there about to take a nap. Oh
man, I tell you what, look at that cuddly bed there. I could use a quick 40 winks. Well,
we still gotta do this, so let's continue on. Okay. I can't tell -- what is Dr. Bones
doing right now? He's being frisky. Dr. Bones is a frisky dog. Dr. Bones is clearly in the
lead. Yes, the good doctor with his trademark red bandana, seems to have control of this
match so far. Red as the day is long, Lou. That doesn't make sense. Didn't know they
could see color. Take a look at Roxy over there: She's got three medium size stacks
of only red chips. That's right, Roxy is sitting at $750 or 15,000 bones, depending on the
exchange rate. Would you take a look at that: Jim Jam is licking his cards. Gary that's
a clear tell. You can see that he likes his cards and is therefore licking them. See if
the other players can pick up on that. I do the same thing with women. He does. I'm on
probation. Hey, did you notice Roxy's hair? Would you say that's an intimidation tactic?
Yeah, the mohawk is there to intimidate your opponent, draw attention to it and away from
the cards. Then again, it could be up to her owner as to how her hair is styled, and Roxy,
clearly, is just living life second to second. That's what I say about me and my wife. I
didn't get that. She cuts my hair and styles it and I have no say over it. Oh, and then
it makes sense. Yeah. Oh, some frustration setting in. She has jumped up on the table
and is knocking things over. Yeah, Roxy is clearly a bitch. I can say that because we
don't know who her father is. That would be a bastard. And that's it for this week. What
a thrilling hand that was Lou. They almost did something related to poker. Right, and
even more amazingly, only one competitor left us a surprise over in the corner. Roxy, we
just took you for a walk! Brand new carpet and everything. Anyway, live from the East
Las Vegas Animal Shelter, it's the 2012 Canine World Series of Poker. We'll see you next
time. No begging. Please.