Things - Black People Need to Stop Doing

Uploaded by ScooterMagruder on 07.06.2012

What's up, guy? Hope you're doing well.
Today I'm going to be talking about things black people need to stop doing.
So, let's get it started! Let's just start with the obvious, names.
Ok, we have got to stop naming our children with these ghetto names.
LaCretria, DeAnthony, and, what is that? Le-sheasha?
Ok, we don't pronounce dashes in the English language.
All you're doing is to make your child's life harder when you do that.
You're the boss of a company. You get two identical resumes.
Do you hire Thomas Smith or do you hire LaDanavian Smith?
Stop jeopardizing your child's future with these names!
You think Obama would have won if his name was LaDanavian?
LaDanavian Obama. And, the same thing goes for nicknames: Pooki,
Lay-Lay, Big Swole If your name is Shay, why do I have to call
you Shay-Shay? Why do I have to say it twice?
There's no reason for that. If your nickname is Boy-Boy, at what time
do you become Man-Man? I'm not going to sit here and be calling a
32 year old man Boy-Boy. We got to stop with these names.
Then again, I'm not one to talk, because everyone calls me Scooter.
Another thing black people need to stop doing: We just need to stop getting in the news.
As a black person, you need to understand you are a representative of all black people.
If you do something foolish, it looks bad for our whole race.
So this whole zombie eating face… You know how upset I was when I found out
this was a black person? And then, the story about the dude who killed
his gay lover cut him up with a switchblade,
and then ate his brain and his heart...what? Now, just tell me if this one is worse than
that! This was on the Huffington Post! I found this
on the Huffington Post. Two Detroit teens have been wounded after
a gun fight broke out over what eye-witnesses say was an argument
over who makes the best Kool-Aid? Please just stay out of the news!
Racism. I know it still exists.
I know. But gone are the days when you can say the
man is keeping me down. Stop blaming our shortcomings on other people.
It's just disrespectful. It's disrespectful to the people who came
before us and achieved so much with so much less.
Let's take the King, for example. Not LeBron, Martin Luther King Jr.
How disappointed would he be if you said you can't get an A in your calculus class
because your teacher doesn't like black people? He would slap you!
He would slap the heck out of you! These people did not give up their lives and
fight for our rights so you can blame the man.
Or, so that you could not vote either. Do you realize how afraid people would be
if black people started voting? People would just be afraid, it would be like
the zombie apocalypse or something. One of the biggest things black people stop
doing is being ratchet. We need to put an end up to all general ratchetness
and advanced level ratchetness also, including but not limited to:
Multi-colored weave. Ok, there's no reason for you to have 7 shades
of hot pink up in your hair, that doesn't look good.
Also, black women, if you have a short weave. If it's short on Monday, it can’t be down
to your knee on Tuesday. That's not fooling anyone.
Stop going on Maury. When has anything ever good come out of someone
going on Maury. We're just making black people look bad when
we do this. Stop getting money and blowing it.
Ok, I see you in the club, you're over here buying bottles for everyone, in the VIP section
making it rain on everyone. If you're doing that on Monday,
come Tuesday don't ask me to hold you 5$! I'm not going to give it to you!
Stop putting 22's on cars that cost less than the rims.
You're not balling when you do stuff like that.
Stop putting 2$ in a gas tank. Please stop showing out on public.
Please stop putting fourteen different designs in your head.
If you're over the age of twelve, your head should not be looking like a sudoku puzzle.
Do not put a chair to hold a spot in a parking lot!
Come on, no! Unless you're a professional tattoo artist,
do not cover your whole body in tattoos, because you know what that does?
That eliminates 79% of all potential jobs that you can now have, because you're covered
in tats everywhere. I'm not saying don't get tattoos, I'm just
saying you got to be reasonable. Stop renting to own TV and furniture, just
save up your money and pay for it! There's no reason for you to be paying 5$
a month for 20 years on a couch. And another, we need to show up on time.
If Hispanic people are beating you to your events that you need to go to,
you need to seriously re-evaluate your life. Of course, you know, stop having all these
children if you can't support them, pay child support.
These are things that I don’t even need to say, I feel.
But please, please, please, stop claiming other children on your taxes!
If they're your kids, then claim them! If you don't take care of them, they're not
your children, don't claim them. Black guys, let me talk to you for a second.
Ok, we got to step our game up. Right now, it's more likely for a black guy
to be incarcerated, to go to prison, than it is for us to graduate from college.
We got to stop our game up. And also, cut the sagging, percent of the
pants, 50%. It needs to be cut 50%.
You can sag, but it needs to be cut by 50%. If you're over the age of 25, there's no reason
to sag your pants anymore. You're a grown man, you don't need to be sagging
your pants like that. I got 2 more years left.
You have no excuse. Stop thinking everyone is hating on you.
Everyone is not hating on you. You may need to be doing something with your
life. And they’re just pointing it out.
Like you're still living in your parents house and you're 37.
People aren’t hating on you, you need to get out of the house.
On twitter, stop with the teams. Team "Light Skin", team "Proud Mom", team
"Drop It Low". Unless you have a uniform, a jersey, don't
put team anything on twitter. That just got out of control.
That pretty much sums up general and advanced level ratchetness.
But here's another thing that black people need to stop doing:
Stop hating on successful black people. When a black person gets to a position of
power, a lot of the time people consider them to be sell-outs.
Isn't that the point? To get out of the hood and provide for your
family so they can have a better life? Isn't that the point?
All my black friends hate on me because I grew up in the suburbs, because I'm not from
‘’The lo”. They say I act white, they say I talk white.
But just because I don't talk like you, just because I didn't grew up in the hood, does
not mean I'm not black. Our experiences, our struggles may be different,
but the truth is black people come from all walks of life.
Dark skin, light skin, rich, poor, we all have unique backgrounds, and until we can
understand that and embrace that, we're not going to grow as a people.
However, on the flipside, some people need to remember where they came from.
That they are actually black. Prime examples include, but are not limited
to: Condoleeza Rice, Clarence Thomas, and Tiger
Woods. 97% of all black people dislike Condoleeza
Rice and Clarence Thomas. I'm just putting it out there.
It's true, take a poll. We love Tiger Woods.
Black people love Tiger Woods. But Tiger...your dad is black, Tiger.
I don't care what your mom...your dad is black, you are black, Tiger Woods.
None of this multi-cultural...Asian. Nahh, ok you're black.
Once you make it, give back to those communities from where you came from.
Don't just up and leave and get all white friends, and act like you weren’t doing
hood-rat foolishness. Because it's documented, there are iPhones
nowadays. But these are some general suggestions that
I have to improve the state of our race. Honestly, we're the best race ever.
I wouldn't want to be any other race. The media and everyone is just so in love
with us. And why wouldn't they be?
We can dance. We are some of the best athletes.
And we invented swag, according to J. And for all the trolls out there, potential
trolls who may be coming to this video. I need you to understand that fried chicken
and watermelon is delicious, no matter what you say.
I don't even know what the big deal about black people liking fried chicken and watermelon.
Everyone likes fried chicken and watermelon! And don't get me started on that Kool-Aid.
Kool-Aid, Lay-Lay, if you're watching this, have the Kool-Aid on deck.
I'm not playing. But in all seriousness, I love black people,
I love us. I think we just need to continue building
each other up, strengthening our communities. Let's not waste opportunities that our ancestors
fought for us to have. And that's all I got for now.
Let me know what your race needs to stop doing. Leave a comment below.
New videos every Sunday. No jugamos juegos.
Throw me the alley. I hate it when women dress a certain way,
and then want to be treated differently. If you’re dressed like a street walker,
in scantily-clad clothing, I'm not going to be expecting to have very deep conversation
with you. That's all I'm saying.
I hate it when girls act like they don't know you.
Like we didn't go to the same middle school and high school together.
Ok, oh, you have double D's now? Wonderful!
I knew you when you were flat-chested. I'm a grown man.